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female
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anonymous
writes: Are women treated with less respect from society once they become mothers. I dont know if its just me or if this is common but I have noticed that since beoming a mother it seems that Im totally disregarded by society in a lot of ways. It kind of feels like I dont even exist. It seesm that once women become mothers we are totally desualised as well. Its almost as if we become 'only what we do in looking after our family' and are considred less than women who arnt mothers or men.Ive been a mother for 8 years and have noticed this from the begining. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Angel ron +, writes (13 January 2006):
 I feel the same way as you do for I get the same treatment too. It seems that modern society don't know how to respect women and women like me and you are constantly crying out to be treated equally and fairly. It also seems that the way we are treated is simply down to manners in that the majority of people inclding men lack manners, decency and respect they have no standards at all. It seems that the days of chivalry have died down and we have turned into a country called rude britannia. so don't worry its all to do with manners. In todays society women should be treated equally , fairly and with respect reagrdless of their age or status.so sweet heart i am toally on your side.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2006): To be honest, I've never noticed this happening, either. I think it has more with being content and happy with the role we play, in the lives of our children and family. And most importantly, being happy with who we are, as people. When I raised my children, I stayed home and went back to work as they got older. I really never cared what society thought. I was too darn busy! Being a Mom, doesn't mean you should give up your vibrancy or your ability to have fun. In my opinion, you're of more value. You have everything, you have life experience, you have knowledge, sophistication, you've learned so much. These are important things, and it really just comes down to self-value. As for becoming "invisible"...no way! I'm out there, front and center and having the best years of my life. It all attitude, hun.
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A
male
reader, harshbutfair  +, writes (13 January 2006):
 Hey anon don't shoot the messenger! I can't change the world but I can tell it like it is. And of course I'm generalising.
Anon, you ask why you are you less attractive. It's biological programming. Your face is just as pretty as before you had kids (and maybe your body too - hell I don't know).
But in terms of biology, you've done your job, men are looking out for fit young women to impregnate... And not those with kids. Hypothetically speaking.
Sorry.
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A
female
reader, purrfectionist84 +, writes (13 January 2006):
 The comment about being less employable and less attractive to men was sarcastic. You're reading into it too much.
I live in the United States, and I haven't really noticed women being treated with less respect upon motherhood. Generally, motherhood is considered a respectable thing. In most cases, mothers are favored over women who choose a lifetime of self-indulgence in lieu of the sacrifices that are required to have children and do a fine job with it.
The attitude regarding motherhood could certainly differ from culture to culture, as the first response suggested.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2006): What I mean is if Im walking down the street without my kids how does the fact that I have had kids even make a difference to my attractivenes as opposed to before kids? Im not saying your wrongjust wanting to understand better?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2006): I dont think Im less employable as I am a teacher who is university trained and also have a degree in another area. My children are all school age. Why should I be less attractive though to men?. I dont understand this thinking.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2006): Australia
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A
male
reader, harshbutfair +, writes (13 January 2006):
Yes. As a mother, you've done your job. Well done.
You're suddenly less employable and also less attractive to men.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 January 2006): Depends on the culture. The question can't be answered unless you at least tell us which country you are from.
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