My relationships only last a few weeks....I need advice on HOW to love someone!
Q. I have been having problems with almost all the girls i have met, the relationships just won't last, plz is there something i have to do to keep girls more closer to me?, we start having problems in a couple of weeks and thats how it ends. plz i ...
A. 5 May 2007: You need to first deal with yourself as a person...
How you feel about yourself depends a lot on how you relate to others.
Learn to love yourself first, as a person.
Self-esteem is an important factor when dealing with partners.
Are you putti... (read in full...)
Should I lose my virginity to him?
Q. I'm 16 and all my mates have lost their virginity to their long term boyfriends. I have been going out with my boyfriend for just over three years. I love and i know that he loves me back. We haven't gone any further than kissing. Should i lose my ...
A. 5 May 2007: The point here is... you are still a child!
Been together for 3years, at 16?
What are your parents thinking to allow this?
The fact that you are unsure & are asking this question, should be a big red flag to you...
No, you should not have sex jus... (read in full...)
I'm getting married this summer but I think I'm in love with a work colleague!
Q. I'm engaged. The wedding is this summer. My fiance and I have been physically separated due to circumstances beyond our control for the past year. In that time, I have become good friends with a woman I work with. We have both often joked that...
A. 5 May 2007: See here... the mere fact that you think you are falling in love with another girl, tells me that to go ahead with this marriage will be a big mistake!
You cannot be feeling this way & say you truly & deeply love your fiance, or you would not have... (read in full...)
How do I get revenge on him without him knowing it was me?
Q. Hi, A guy ditched me just before xmas, made me feel hurt and humiliated. Is there anyway I can get revenge on him but not, so it's a giveaway that it's me....
A. 21 December 2006: You know, This is the best advise I can give you right now...
The best revenge is success... be successfull in what you do in your life.Your enemies hate that, plus you have the added advantage of not attracting bad karma while you are doing it. ... (read in full...)
I confronted my wife about the affairs I found out about and she claims they're over - the last email was 4 days ago!
Q. My wife and I have been married 23 years. We have two daughters, one in college and one in third grade. I love her deeply, passionately, and openly. She is always saying how lucky she is to have me. I pay attention to her, I notice new clothes, ...
A. 16 December 2006: This woman is a real piece of work...
I think she is using you to her own advantage... she is selfish & unappreciative of just how lucky she is to have a husband of your calibre.
Sorry, I have no sympathy for her, she has turned you into her own ... (read in full...)
I Think My penis is small is there anything I can do to help it grow?
Q. I Think My Penis is Small is there anything i can do 2 help it grow? i'm in my 20's got a 6 inch cock and it's mega thin. is this normal? my last girlfriend loved it. she told me her boyfriend before me had a smaller one. do you think a 6 inch i...
A. 16 December 2006: Well, I think you should feel blessed with your measurement... some guys would kill for what you have...seriously.... (read in full...)
I fell for a woman at work and I'm married! How do I forget this woman and work on my marriage?
Q. What's the cure for love? Please help me! I'm married and I accidentally fell for another woman. (Not having any affair, and she doesn't care about me) I feel miserable. I think about her every 5 minutes or so, wishing so badly I could be with he...
A. 16 December 2006: To start with,falling for someone else happens accidendally!
Of that you can be sure.
Secondly, you must have had something in common with your wife in the first place, or you would not have married her..
you must have been attracted to her surel... (read in full...)
New to dearcupid..is it okay to post a question that is quite long?
Q. hi. i'm new to using dearcupid. most or all posted questions and answers are viewed by everyone, right? is it ok if posting a question is that is quite long? probably even take nearly whole page to write or discuss problem. what do you suggest?...
A. 16 December 2006: I personally feel that I like to get straight to the point of the problem, so long winded questions tend to put me off a tad... as long as you are clear & concise & not too long winded, I would be happy to be of assistance.... (read in full...)
A mutual friend keeps calling round to discuss her sexual problems with my HUSBAND!
Q. Sorry but i don`t know what to do. A mutusal girlfriend is forever calli ng round to discuss her sexual problems withj my husband. The sexual tension is palpable and despite telli ng him i feel threatened he calls me paranoid. To get the agony over ...
A. 7 May 2006: Oh sweet girl, you just cannot allow this vixen into your home anymore. She is in the process of stealing your husband out from under your very nose and it is up to you to put an end to it ...
Cut your ties with her. She has no business discussi... (read in full...)
Do I go back to the woman who stabbed me in the chest? I've fallen for her again!
Q. Hi, I meet a girl four years ago and we was going out for the 1st two years and was really happy. I moved in with her and her 10 year old daughter, and my two kids stayed at the weekend.Two years ago on Boxing day we had a party and both got drun...
A. 11 February 2006: Yes, I agree, this is one psycho chick for sure,
you must be either very brave or very stupid.
No, seriously....
What has she done to prove she can control her temper now?
Are you willing to take that chance?
And please, whatever you do...
... (read in full...)
We split and I got with his friend but now I find I still have feelings for them both...
Q. I was going out with this guy for a year and a half. My feelings eventually changed and i broke up with him. He was really hurt and got suicidal and stuff for like a month. During this month i had been spending a lot of time with my friend.. who is ...
A. 11 February 2006: Sweeetie, You must take a break from both these guys and step back,
then see which one comes seeking you out first.
Men are hunters...not the hunted, let them do the hunting & stop running around in circles for these guys.
Wishing You T... (read in full...)
I'm shy and need lots of advice for when my boy's parents take us both out for dinner!
Q. My bf's parents want to take him and me out to ahve dinner and I'm so nervous. This will be my first one on one with them and I'm freaking out...I hate to admit I'm shy and I tried my best not to be that way around them and talk and be relaxed and I ...
A. 11 February 2006: I would say don't dress revealingly or too formally, don't hug or kiss in front of the parents, holding his hand might help for moral support, smile a lot & don't get drunk.
Go & enjoy the dinner together, his parents have had experience of life... (read in full...)
What does she really want from me??
Q. Dear cupid, What kind of relationship is this? Ok people we've probably remmeber that i broke up with my ex 4 weeks ago, an last friday we realized we both still had feelings for each other. This evolved into this: she sed she wants 2 be ...
A. 7 February 2006: Hey Barnzy,
This girl is really calling all the shots....
Everything is on her terms... this is just wrong.
Yes, you do need to tell her it must be out in the open or nothing,if you still decide you want to persue this.
My view, standing h... (read in full...)
He smokes and drinks and parties. I don't and I'm a virgin. Should I try to make a move on him?
Q. I'm 19 years old female and I have a crush on this 19 year old guy at my college. I heard from my friend that he has a crush on me too. The problem is he doesn't want to start anything with me because he drinks and smokes and I don't. He has it i...
A. 6 February 2006: You must ask yourself whether you would be prepared to fit in with his kind of lifestyle, and think about how different your life is compared to his.
You obviously have different moral values to him as well.
How will a relationship with guy con... (read in full...)
Is there something suspicious about my friend's text relationship? I'm worried about her...
Q. My friend has recently been texting this boy all the time and they have had a good texting relationship but when she asks if she can meet him, he says that "he does not want to rush into things". They have been texting for six months now and he has ...
A. 6 February 2006: I reckon this guy is married, old, and fooling with her.
It it so obvious there is a lot that is not kosher with the whole scenario.
Unfortunately, young girls can be so gullible in these situations.... (read in full...)
I've met the woman I know I want to spend my life with, and now I have to tell my wife...
Q. I am a 44 year old man. I have been with my wife for 25 years and we have four children - aged 23, 21, 16 and 15. The eldest are both in their own professions and lead happy and successful lives away from home. The two youngest at home with us. ...
A. 5 February 2006: You are sorry that your post is so long??
If I were you, I would be sorry for a hell of a lot more than that...
You are a sorry individual & I also do not have any sympathy for you...
And for saying so, I am not sorry.... (read in full...)
Even though I have a great boyfriend, I find myself talking to the guy who raped me! Why?
Q. I was raped a couple years ago, and I never pressed charges. I have a boyfriend now who is very supportive. However, the guy who did it still talks to me all the time. And I find myself talking back and wanting to talk to him, but I can't figure out ...
A. 5 February 2006: Hi Sweetie, my pleasure ...
Ok, I am beginning to understand your circumstances a bit better now, thanx for coming back to me ...
You can in fact report a rape to the authorities up to 10 years after it has taken place, here in South Africa... (read in full...)
What does she really want from me??
Q. Dear cupid, What kind of relationship is this? Ok people we've probably remmeber that i broke up with my ex 4 weeks ago, an last friday we realized we both still had feelings for each other. This evolved into this: she sed she wants 2 be ...
A. 5 February 2006: She doesn't want to be seen with you in public & she does't want anyone to know you are together...
Well, it sounds like she either has something to hide, or she is ashamed of you...
Do you really want to get involved with someone like tha... (read in full...)
The average size??
Q. Hey, i am 15 and am curious to know if a 6.5" penis is below average?.....any answers?...
A. 5 February 2006: Go to website www.average-penis-size-chart.com
You will find all the answers there.... (read in full...)
I want him to be my date fir Valentines...what do I do?
Q. There is a guy. I like him. I've liked him for almost a year. I asked if he liked me about 5 months ago, and he said no. Now, my friends say he is starting to show signs that he likes me. I don't want to ruin our frienship, by asking if he likes me. ...
A. 5 February 2006: He told you 5 months ago that he doesn't like you...
By asking him to be your valentine date, I guess you have nothing to lose...
The worst that could happen is he can say no.
Good Luck.... (read in full...)
We've had phone sex and I would like more though I'm married...
Q. hi im a married women that met a guy while helping my cousins find a property i met this estate agent he i taught was nice anyways he gave us his no. and shortly after i began texting him and i told him who i was we began to have phone sex which has ...
A. 5 February 2006: Oh pleeaasse....
Do you have a brain?
Then use it....... (read in full...)
What do you think is the definition of Love?
Q. I was told this, do you believe this is love or the starting point of it. “mmmm I don’t know what the definition of love is, but it's a feeling that you get for someone. Sometimes you don’t really notice it is there. Like when the person you l...
A. 5 February 2006: The definition of love... here is my point of view...
I rather like acronyms & these two say it all...
Life's
Only
Valid
Expression
***********
Life's
Only
Valuable
Experience
***********
And also,
Love never qu... (read in full...)
Why doesn't she take the hint that I want to break up?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for a year now but I've wanted to break up with her for months. She's very possessive and I feel she's smothering me. I have no time for myself, my family, my friends or school. All I ever do is spend time with her and ...
A. 5 February 2006: I agree... if she cant take the hint, tell her...
You have too many plans for the future which I am not wanting to share with you.
You are too much for me.
I want to break up with you.
See? Easy!... (read in full...)
I'm a virgin and I can't believe anyone will ever want to marry me one day, or have kids!
Q. Hi, I am 18 and still a virgin but I feel really embarrassed when my friends talk about them losing their virginity, and I feel that no one will want to marry me one day or have chidren. What can I do about this? I want to lose it with someone I ...
A. 5 February 2006: Firstly, I would like to congratulate you on still being a virgin at 18.
This is very commendable 7 you should be so proud of yourself!
You have the right attitude... I only wish there were more
young women in the world like you!
You will... (read in full...)
Does my ex want me back?
Q. Dear Cupid, I broke up with my girlfriend just over 3 weeks ago. Basically we haven't been on speaking terms till last Friday night. We spoke on the phone and we really did click. It felt like the old days again. However I invited her to a party ...
A. 5 February 2006: Hi again,
Well, in answer to your next question...
She is obviously wanting an open relationship & is not willing to commit to you exclusively, so you are unfortunately wanting different things...
As you are not happy to have this arran... (read in full...)
Follow my heart..?
Q. One simple question: Is following your heart REALLY the smartest thing to do ? I mean yeah, it sounds really cute and romantic, but is this truly the wisest decision for yourself? I keep telling myself and my boyfriend, that the reason I'm s...
A. 5 February 2006: I have always relied on my inner voice... my intuition to help me make decisions in my life & this has always paid off... the heart is full of desires & emotions...which often lead to making the wrong choices.... (read in full...)
She's younger, has a child and my parents don't approve. But she's so alone and I keep coming back to her!
Q. Hi, I met a girl 4 years ago through a friend. She is 9 years younger than me. She was 15 and I was 24 at the time. We had 18 great months together. We saw each other every day over that 18 months, then she cheted on me with a guy a couple of years...
A. 5 February 2006: This woman has loose morals, she cheated on you in the past, she now has an illegitemate child by some other guy
who beat her up & now she expects sympathy from you...
I feel that you know in your heart that she is not good for you.
Your b... (read in full...)
We walked home, talked and kissed. Then, next day, she texts and says "just forget about it"...
Q. I met a girl in a nightclub over a month and we started got on well, at the end of the night she mentioned she lives with her boyfriend of 6 years who has a short temper and is very possessive (so she has to be careful). I didn't think to much ...
A. 5 February 2006: What?? She is living with her boyfriend of 6 years who is possesive and has a short temper?
And she is out clubbing without him? Then she leads you on
and proceeds to drop you...
I am sorry, but something is wrong with this picture.
She s... (read in full...)
We had a special professional relationship, and the attraction was mutual. Should I get back in touch?
Q. I care about a younger guy. I didn't know he was younger until it was too late. He's the trainer and I am the student, he gave me some private training at his home which I paid for. He knows I care about him and there would be 'excuse' touches ...
A. 5 February 2006: Well, you have left your door open & put the ball in his court...
If he promised to be in touch the last time you had contact, then you best see if he can be true to his word.
It would be unwise to go chasing after him, wait and see if he delive... (read in full...)
Lost two boyfriends because I wouldn't let them feel my breasts. What should I do?
Q. I am 15 and I go out with boys, but I admit I get frightened when I am kissing my boyfriend and he tries to feel my breasts so I stop him. I have lost two boys because of this. Should I let him do this and if I do, will he want more?...
A. 5 February 2006: If you are uncomfortable with something, say no!
This is a good rule of thumb for anything in life.
If these boys have dumped you for saying no to feeling your breasts, then good riddance to them!
Never, and I mean... never... let anybody do a... (read in full...)
Feel good about getting over my ex, but sorry her BF cheated on her. Should I send V Day flowers?
Q. I cut off contact from a woman I was seeing when she went back to an ex boyfriend. She wanted to stay in touch, but I didnt answer her phone calls, to help me get over her. It's now been 7 weeks of no contact, the hurt has gone and I feel good abo...
A. 5 February 2006: Well, what a sweet gesture...
If it will make you happy to send her flowers anonymously,
then by all means, do so... it will at least bring a bit of joy to her life & brighten her day.
She might have a bit of explaining to do to her boyfriend... (read in full...)
Even though I have a great boyfriend, I find myself talking to the guy who raped me! Why?
Q. I was raped a couple years ago, and I never pressed charges. I have a boyfriend now who is very supportive. However, the guy who did it still talks to me all the time. And I find myself talking back and wanting to talk to him, but I can't figure out ...
A. 5 February 2006: You dont say in what circumstances you were raped...
Was it date rape, or otherwise?
I mean, were you violently attacked by this rapist & did you know him at the time?
Ok, sure, I realise rape is rape, but there must be some deep psychologic... (read in full...)
I'm shy with women and lack confidence. Because I'm so afraid of failure, chatting is awkward... What can I do?
Q. Dear Cupid, I am what has frequently been described as a very good looking mixed race guy (3/4 black) who is "off-puttingly" shy and lacks confidence. Because of this I believe I have never had a proper lasting relationship or anything when I'...
A. 5 February 2006: People are by human nature, attracted to those who have a happy disposition & a positive attitude to life in general.
You will never find a depressed, negative person drawing people to them... it repells them.
Dont just walk into a room... E... (read in full...)
My Dad reckons that guys only go for girls with big boobs no matter how pretty... Is it true?!
Q. ok, I'm 15 and I am just wondering, what is it that attracts most guys to a girl in the first place? I know the whole thing about how everyone likes something different etc etc, but my stepdad says 90% of teen guys want someone with big boobs no ...
A. 5 February 2006: Yes, the information your dad has given you is very incorrect, but please dont direspect him and call him names, & show consideration for your mom, she is only concerned for you.... (read in full...)
I turned her down a couple years ago..but now I really like her. What should I do?
Q. I am 16 years old and a couple of years ago I was asked out by this girl. At the time I didn't think she was anything special so I said no. Ironically now its me that fancies her and I don't know if she still likes me. The problem is that I ...
A. 5 February 2006: There's a good old saying that goes...
Don't burn your bridges... cause you never know when you might need to cross them again.
Perfect advice from Bev, take it.
Good Luck!... (read in full...)
My friend's online dating guy is a cheating rat! How do I tell her this?
Q. Hi all, I really need some advice about this. I joined an online dating site about a month ago. I joined this particular site because a couple of friends of mine have had some successes. One of these friends, met a guy last summer and has been...
A. 5 February 2006: Yes, I also say tell your friend... she needs to at least know!... (read in full...)
The photos on her camera were pretty devastating. I left and haven't spoken to her in 3 days. Am I overreacting?
Q. My girlfriend and I have been in a serious relationship for 2 1/2 years now. I am going to be 30 and she is 23. We have all along talked about marriage, kids, our age difference, etc. It never really mattered. I was really careful in the 1st year ...
A. 5 February 2006: I don't think your girlfriend is quite ready for marriage & motherhood & just wants to be a girl for a little while longer & be with her friends without pressures.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with this.
The photos you describe are also ver... (read in full...)
My school friend sucks up to all the teachers and thinks she's better than me. I'm so annoyed with her!
Q. hi, its just my friend is really annoying me. In school she sucks up to all the teachers i think she loves them or something and she always has to do better than me in everything. im really starting to hate her shall i say something to her? please ...
A. 5 February 2006: Sweetie this girl is not your friend...
Friends are people who will stand up for you & not bring you down... they are the kind of people who make you feel good when you are around them...she is toxic for you & does not deserve to be called your frie... (read in full...)
Need some answers about sex the first time, please!
Q. Everytime I get a boyfriend they always want sex. I do want to do it but I'm really scared of getting pregnant. What would be the best type of contraception? Would the pill and condom be good together? Is sex sore the first time and can anyone give ...
A. 5 February 2006: Sweetie you don't sound as if you are at all ready, or mature enough to be having sexual experiences with boys.
Focus on your studies for now, and wait till you are mature enough to be having sex... at least wait till you are out of school! ... (read in full...)
I want to know if my guy has really broken up with his girlfriend. They're together a lot!
Q. How can I know for sure that this guy I really like dumped his girlfriend? He has a really bad history of lying, and I've asked him millions of times and he tells me they are not dating anymore, But he still hangs out with her and sleeps there ...
A. 5 February 2006: Well, if he has a reputation for lying & you can't ever believe a word he says, ask yourself if he is the kind of guy you want to get mixed up with...
That is what concerns me.
The other point of concern, is that he is still hanging around with ... (read in full...)
Does my ex want me back?
Q. Dear Cupid, I broke up with my girlfriend just over 3 weeks ago. Basically we haven't been on speaking terms till last Friday night. We spoke on the phone and we really did click. It felt like the old days again. However I invited her to a party ...
A. 5 February 2006: well, you both still have feelings for each other... this you have established..
She got asked out by another guy & she turned him down..
She chose to tell you about this, when she didn't really have to.
I think it would be safe to say tha... (read in full...)
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