| A
male
,
*arnzy
writes: Dear cupid,What kind of relationship is this?Ok people we've probably remmeber that i broke up with my ex 4 weeks ago, an last friday we realized we both still had feelings for each other. This evolved into this:she sed she wants 2 be together with me, she wants us to be more than friends but not as boyfriend and girlfriend. Then i say ok but as long as i know that u wont just go away with some other guy. She then sez ok but she said that she doesnt want anyone to know we are together, also sed she doesnt want us to meet at dinner and stuff. So what does she really want? Is she using me?
View related questions:
broke up, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, smeedle  +, writes (9 February 2006):
 Bin her Barnzy, she just aint worth the hasstle!!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 February 2006): Blank her for good! She sounds like she's not ready to date anyone..let alone you, hun. Be distant, casual friends with her but don't hold out for anything more than she is willing to give you. Get out there and date..have fun meeting new people. This is what dating is all about. It's getting your feet wet...learning about love and relationships, preparing you for life, building social skills, building self-esteem, dealing with one's emotions in a mature way. All a huge learning process. Focus in on a girl who isn't so wishy washy and has more sensibilities about her. This girl sounds like she doesn't know what she wants, dear. She sounds like she could end up 'playing with your heart!" Be careful and Take Care
...............................
A
female
reader, fairyangel  +, writes (7 February 2006):
 Hey Barnzy,
This girl is really calling all the shots....
Everything is on her terms... this is just wrong.
Yes, you do need to tell her it must be out in the open or nothing,if you still decide you want to persue this.
My view, standing here on the outside, is that she sounds a bit dicey to me. Really.
But that is just my opinion... use it/ dont use it...
I wish you well & sincerely hope the decisions you make
from now on, are the right ones for you.
Good Luck.
...............................
A
male
reader, Barnzy +, writes (7 February 2006):
Barnzy is verified as being by the original poster of the question Update on the situation...OK so i agreed to what she wanted but she also agreed not to go off with any other guy. But we did that over the phone. The last time i saw her in person was at the party. When i asked to meet her yesterday at college she said yes after college. But after college she said that she can't because shes got to go home early and practice on her guitar for her lesson. Then i ask to meet her today at dinner and then she said that she can't becasue she made over plans. Does this sound suspicious or what?The only advice i ask for now is should i confront her and tell her its either having a relationship with me in public or non whatsoever, or should i blank her forever?
...............................
A
female
reader, smeedle +, writes (6 February 2006):
Hi Barnzy, you have answered your own question, she does not want a full on relationship with you what she want is the power holds over you, by having a kind of secret relationship with you she gets to keep you dangling which is a very powerful thing, she is calling all the shots and you would be letting her use you in this dreadful way if you continue, before long your confidence will dwindle and you will loose sight of the wonderful and strong person you are, you do not want to be her shadow and under her command, ditch her and move on, tell her that you will not be treated in this way and it is a full on relationship out in the open or not at all.
...............................
A
female
reader, fairyangel +, writes (5 February 2006):
She doesn't want to be seen with you in public & she does't want anyone to know you are together...
Well, it sounds like she either has something to hide, or she is ashamed of you...
Do you really want to get involved with someone like that?
She does't know herself, what she wants.
...............................
A
female
reader, shania +, writes (5 February 2006):
 Im confused as well.She said that she wanted to be more then friends but not as boyfriend and girlfriend...why? Well it seems to me that she is keeping her options open until another fella comes along...and in my book that is using someone.If i was you i would just let her go.
...............................
|
