I feel that his actions disrespect our relationship
Q. My boyfriend has been talking to another girl recently and I'm wondering if I should be worried? This is what my boyfriend says happened: she is friends with my boyfriends friends and they met while they were all hanging out one night. Her and m...
A. 2 February 2014: I agree with you 100%. "You should trust me" is a weak excuse for him to do what he wants. Next he'll be using shaming tactics like telling you that you're crazy and irrationally jealous. When he tells you that YOU should trust him he's doing two ... (read in full...)
Four years and I still haven't moved on from my first love
Q. So here is my problem. I cannot seem to get over my ex boyfriend! He was my first love, we were together for 6 years and for 95% we were happy. However it ended with us both cheating on one another (I know - couldn't have been that happy right...
A. 2 February 2014: No judgements. Just advice. Stop texting him. It does you no good. You could make one final plea and confess your feelings but I personally don't think that's a good idea and it's unfair to his current gf. It may end up back firing on you too if ... (read in full...)
My husband told me he doesn't find my body attractive! What now?
Q. *Sorry if it is lengthy** I am in desperate need of advice. To be blunt to start out with, my husband reluctantly told me that he doesn’t find my body to be attractive. I am 24 years old, about to turn 25 next month. My husband is 28 going to...
A. 23 January 2014: You seem like a lovely couple. You're overlooking the fact that love and marriage go far deeper than beauty, which is only skin deep. Your husband is wise. He knows this. He has had his fill of other types of women. He deliberately and willfully ... (read in full...)
Her training to fight makes me feel insecure.
Q. I'm in a fairly new relationship with a woman I adore. Our courtship lasted a bit long but we didn't want to get into a relationship just after a few weeks of admitting we liked each other. After a little over a year, we became happily official. T...
A. 22 January 2014: It seems as if this is a hobby of hers. I dated a guy who loved to hunt. I lost a lot of sleep over the moral decision to stay with a guy who shot living creatures "for fun," given this was such a drastic departure from my own moral compass. In the ... (read in full...)
Should I continue seeing this guy?
Q. So I met a guy on this dating site and and we started talking and we exchanged numbers and went on one date- the date actually went great we spend 5 hours talking it felt really comfortable and at first I never took it serious because I thought omg ...
A. 21 January 2014: Of course you should continue talking to him. The two of you are probably logging in to check on each other. You're not wrong to give in to urges and more importantly you're not wrong to want exclusivity and above it all you're right for being ... (read in full...)
Did she end our friendship (again) because she likes my husband and cant stand seeing us happy?
Q. So I've been best friends with a woman for 15 years. The first 5 we were inseperable. We met husbands around the same time 5 years later but after the birth of my son, she dropped me. I called and left messages but never heard from her again for 5 ...
A. 6 February 2013: Obviously she's humiliated that she threw herself at your husband and was rejected. She probably figures you wouldn't want to continue this friendship and why do you?... (read in full...)
We tried to move past his cheating but I'm recently starting to resent him for many things, how do I approach this situation?
Q. I don't even know where to start with this be here goes. So I have been in a 3 and half yeah relationship with my boyfriend. He cheated on me but we decided to move on together and move past the situation. We have gone on to have a little boy and...
A. 6 February 2013: What you have described epitomizes the downfall of the modern woman. The relationship you are settling for is very common. He expects more of you than you do of him . He expects you to be in better shape than him. Not only did he cheat, but he made ... (read in full...)
Why did he go out of his way to NOT mention that he has a Gf when he talked to me so often, and more recently flirted with me?
Q. I went out with my coworker two years ago. Things didn't work out between us, and we both (especially him) moved on... but lately we'e been flirting a lot again. [Please don't tell me it won't work out because we work together. If he had expresse...
A. 6 February 2013: @so_very_confused -- I don't know how long the kiss was as I didn't linger to watch it lol. I kept my steady walking pace and saw her lean into kiss him , and he leaned forward to meet her lips and I adverted my eyes and walked faster bc he and I ... (read in full...)
I hate kissing
Q. So, I know this may sound weird and it is but I really don't like kissing. Like, I hate it. I don't even know if I can get over it? Anyone have this problem? Btw, I have a boyfriend now and this problem has been since my first boyfriend like 5 years ...
A. 5 September 2011: I didn't like kissing until I found someone who was amazing at it.
... (read in full...)
What does it mean for a relationship to 'move forward'?
Q. Yo so I got a question. My girl broke up with me last week because she says our relationship wasnt movin forward. I asked what that meant, I asked if it meant she wanted me to propose marriage. She said no, she didnt mean that, it was just that the ...
A. 4 August 2011: It depends. It could mean any one of several things. Maybe she has noticed that you haven't taken it to the next stage in a bunch of different ways-- moving in, introducing her to your friends and family, spending more time w/ her, treating her as ... (read in full...)
Am I wrong to be jealous or does my boyfriend like this girl?
Q. We work together. We've been together for 4 months. The girl has worked there for 3 months... she started a month after he and I began talking and dating... Two days after she started, she had his number. Bc she and I were walking to the hap...
A. 4 August 2011: Thanks for the input everyone. I fear I was a little unclear-- he and I ARE exclusive already... the girl, by now, has a sense that he and I are seeing each other bc as you know, word spreads. Her not being aware occurred her first week with the ... (read in full...)
How can I make myself more attractive?
Q. How can i make myself more attractive about me im 5`7 i have black hair its down to my shoulders i always wear it down, i have a big butt and my chest is medium sized. umm people say they like my personality my laugh and my smile umm my arms are a ...
A. 4 August 2011: I actually went through this not long ago. I just got tired of being a dowdy debbie, so I basically gave myself a makeover. You don't have to spend a lot of money by going to get facials etc (although you can if it's within your abilities!) I just ... (read in full...)
Am I just helping her back to health so she can go on to meet someone new?
Q. I have talked about my situation before but will give a bit of context. My ex left me 5 months ago for another man claiming that although she was still in love with me she had major issues with my family, especially my mother, ex-wife and daughter ...
A. 4 August 2011: Sadly, I think you are giving more than you are receiving. I would advise you to seek a more fulfilling and mutually beneficial relationship.... (read in full...)
Doe it mean he's trustworthy if he wants to be your Facebook friend?
Q. Simple question, if a guy you're seeing wants to be friends on facebook, is this a good sign that he is genuine? Because i think that if were friends on there, then he is honest about not having a girlfriend or dating anyone else. Like he doesn't ...
A. 3 May 2011: I dated a guy who i MET on facebook and it was the worst experience of my life. He was the LEAST trust worthy guy I knew. Sure enough, he was "single," if that's your main concern, that he's likely not married. You'll be able to tell if those 30... (read in full...)
My boyfriend lied about sleeping with a close friend while we were seeing each other.
Q. My boyfriend recently confessed that he slept with a close female friend of his. It's a little bit complicated because this girl, C, was a long time girlfriend of one of the other guys in their group of friends and she and him would often spend time ...
A. 27 April 2011: I see your perspective. I do understand. However, you can't complain much. When women agree to a no-strings-attached, or FWB arrangement, they forfeit their emotional rights. Lying to you wasn't a good sign, but people in general are so wrapped up ... (read in full...)
He talks to other women...what do I do?
Q. I found my husband has been talking to a lot of women. He has started hiding things better now that I found out he slept with one. He mashed up his cell phone because he didn't want me to see who was on it. He even went as far as changing the ...
A. 26 April 2011: Either he is two-timing you and going to elaborate extremes to conceal his other life from you (which could be very dangerous, be careful...) or you are a very very jealous, suspicious person by nature and he has to hide even business contacts from ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has no ambitions for his career! Should I be concerned? Is there any hope for a future with him?
Q. I've only been with him for 2 months and have only known him for about 4 months. We work together. I just started. He's been with the company for 3 years. He's 28, about to be 29 in a matter of weeks. He comes from a very good family--I don't mean ...
A. 26 April 2011: Thank you, Drew, for taking the time to lend some insightful input.
Well, first of all, your "unrelated" point--the high school degree. lol I'm from Pittsburgh (Pennsylvania for all of our international friends,) which is a blue collar town and... (read in full...)
My son just had a baby with his GF, who was sexually abused by her mom's boyfriend. Now they've buried the hatchet and my grand daughter is left at home with this sick man!!
Q. I have a problem my 17 year old son is dating a 17 year old girl. They have had a baby recently but the worse problem besides they are teens is a year to year and half ago my sons girlfriends moms live in boyfriend sexually abused her. she had ...
A. 20 April 2011: That is a huge problem and you have every right in the world to be outraged. Everyone needs to sit down and have a talk. Be assertive and strong. Firmly state your position that this man has NO right to be alone with your grand daughter. First try ... (read in full...)
How can I lose weight on my limited food options and budget?
Q. I am aware this is not a diet or healthy eating site but I need help. I quite literally have no money anymore (don't ask long story), I cant afford to buy my own food and drink so I have to eat whats available at home. Which isn't much, we h...
A. 19 April 2011: If you can't control the quality of food, control the quantity. Portion control. Ppl who have the luxury of affording nutritious food are encouraged to eat often but in small portions and healthy food. In your case, id suggest you just focus on not ... (read in full...)
Do you think girls who go with guys to a strip club are trashy?
Q. Guys, do you think it's trashy for a girl to accompany a group of guys to the strip club? I think it's a certain type of girl who is willing to go along on this "adventure," and I dont't think she's the type you wanna bring home to mom/MAKE the ...
A. 19 April 2011: "I think you are very judgemental" that sounds a little judgemental to me.... (read in full...)
Do you think girls who go with guys to a strip club are trashy?
Q. Guys, do you think it's trashy for a girl to accompany a group of guys to the strip club? I think it's a certain type of girl who is willing to go along on this "adventure," and I dont't think she's the type you wanna bring home to mom/MAKE the ...
A. 19 April 2011: I'm sorry, my question was unclear. I was specifically not referring to going as a couple, with your bf or husband...but rather going with a GROUP of guys.... (read in full...)
My ex likes me quiet, but bugs me until I scream. How can I get his attention more? I still like him!
Q. The other day i was messing with one of my ex's because i still like him. Well he asked me if i still like him and i was afraid what he would say if i say yes so i told him i dont know, and he kept bugging me about it so i told him no. But now i am ...
A. 18 April 2011: He's got you right where he wants you. He is playing games and you are falling into his traps. Walk away now in order to maintain your dignity and sanity.... (read in full...)
I still have his jacket...should I give it back?
Q. Hey, My ex broke up with me about 6 months ago- but we've had this back and forth thing where he'll call me every 2-3 months (drunk and sober) saying that he misses me, that i scare the shit out of him. There's an age difference between us I'm 2...
A. 18 April 2011: Nope. I don't think you should return it. I think it'll fuel the fire you feel for him. ... (read in full...)
What guy wants a girl with no personality?
Q. i was in a long term relationship for 7 months until it got too much and we split, we split as i had enough of him making me do things like not letting me go out or sometimes even speak to boys, he also stopped me going out with my friends as much, ...
A. 13 April 2011: Who is to say you have no personality? Someone out there just may love you for who/what/how you are right now. The trick to gaining confidence and attracting a partner is to accept yourself... don't TRY to be anything you're not, which is what it ... (read in full...)
How do I figure out whether I really can't trust him or if I'm just insecure?
Q. I have a problem regarding my relationship- hope you can help. My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost two years,unfortunately we are in a long distance relationship. The problem is that even though we speak on the phone every night, k...
A. 13 April 2011: It sounds like you already know that you're the problem. You haven't given one reason for the distrust but your own insecurities. So either learn to control them or get ready to be single.... (read in full...)
Husband could never cum from anything other than actual sex?
Q. I wonder ,if you can help me figure out this strange sex problem. I live in a long term marriage, and we had good sex life. My husband was very highly sexual, and good lover. Now ,he has very serious sexual dysfunction. He is not medically ill, b...
A. 12 April 2011: I've been w/ a few guys like this. After I while I stopped taking it personally and was just like, "whatever" not the snippy kind of "whatever," just the--"whatever you need to do" type of whatever. I was even w/ a guy who could only get himself ... (read in full...)
I told fiance I was going to miss being with her while away and she started to cry. What did I do wrong?
Q. I am a 28 year old guy. My fiance is 24. We are separated for a few days as I had to go on a work related trip (in my hotel room now) and she could not come with me because of her own responsibilities. When we were in bed the other night, I told ...
A. 12 April 2011: Maybe they were tears of sentiment? If she didn't seem angry, then she was prob just emotional and you uttering those words touched a soft spot in her heart. ... (read in full...)
Why did my husband fondle me then go masturbate in the bathroom when we were at a friend's house?
Q. I do not have any idea how to title this question. I am 31 and my husband is 32. We were at some friends' house recently. He came to me and asked to come with him. We went into a bedroom and he closed and locked the door. He said to me to get ...
A. 12 April 2011: Um....okay? Something must've happened to get him REALLY horny, the type of hard-throbbing-impossible-to-ignore surge of sexual energy, but felt weird having sex in his friend's house. SO he did the next best thing that would relieve the tension ... (read in full...)
He ignores my texts and only contacts me when he wants sex
Q. I'm a gay guy. I met a guy a few weeks ago and we've seen each other a few times since.We always have amazing sex, and he always says how great the sex is.Thing is i text him and it gets ignored.Then maybe a couple of weeks later he will text to ...
A. 12 April 2011: Why is this hard to understand? He says you have AMAZING sex, and you agree--he doesn't say you have amazing conversations or you have a spiritual connection or anything along those lines... so it's purely physical. If that's not what you're looking ... (read in full...)
Is it illegal to date a step cousin?
Q. Is it illegal to date a step cousin? Or better yet, a first step cousin? I have a huge problem. Over the past weekend, me and my step cousin have gotten really close. I may have some strong feelings for him, and im pretty sure my family would ...
A. 12 April 2011: No. Not that I condone incest--but in most states in the US it isn't even illegal to marry first cousins. ... (read in full...)
Do I believe the manipulative ex wife or the lying boyfriend?
Q. I have known my fiance for two and a half years. He moved to my town for work. We lived together until his contract ended and are now in a long distance relationship. We planned to marry in September. Last week however I felt as if my world had ...
A. 12 April 2011: Take a little from her story, a little from his story, and the most important ingredient: Your own intuition and you'll have the answer. ... (read in full...)
I had sex with my GF and my sister heard. What do I do if she mentions it to me?
Q. im 15 and have recently had sex with my girlfriend. people started to know and it got to my sisters friend. her friend told my sister and now she knows. im really paranoid that it will come up in conversation. im really close to my sister but now i ...
A. 11 April 2011: Make a joke and exit stage left quickly. She'll get the hint you're not comfortable w/ the topic.... (read in full...)
He'll never be anything more than a liar. We had 2 weeks planned. What should I do?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been in long distance relationship for almost two years now. We see each other every weekend, and yesterday he arrived here and is going to stay with me for 3 weeks (we did this before, in August last year and it was grea...
A. 11 April 2011: Honestly, it sounds like you rummaged through his things--either phone or computer. As you won't go into detail about what you discovered, it's hard to say. He "Might" have cheated?? If you are distrustful, maybe that alone warrants a break. Esp if ... (read in full...)
Any advice for menstrual irregularities?
Q. I am having bad menstrual irregularities, i used to be sexually active two years ago, i would take the morning after pill very regularly, however i totally went off sex, and last year my period was reasonably regular, this year however, i have had ...
A. 11 April 2011: The morning after pill. I wouldn't trust it. It hasn't been out that long and it's a foreign concoction that you're allowing into your system where it may mix and disassemble your natural system. I don't take any of those birth control ... (read in full...)
He walks all over me. I want him to respect me. How do I do it?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have low self esteem. My boyfriend senses this so he feels that things are super "safe" with me because I will never leave him. So sometimes he enjoys driving me up the wall and rarely apologizes anymore. Most days he's sweet but some...
A. 11 April 2011: It sounds like you already know what you need to do. Just stick to it. If, after time, he isn't adhering to the rules of conduct you've set for the relationship, decide which is more important to you: him or yourself.... (read in full...)
Sexual encounter btw an 18 yr and 25 yr? legal yes but is it ok?
Q. Thoughts on a recent high school graduate having sex with a 25 yo? Or a college sophomore dating a 26 yo? I know its legal but is it appropriate?...
A. 7 April 2011: Ok. I just wanted to do a poll to see if I'm alone here, turns out I am! Hehe. I know its legal, bc the law considers 18 to be the age when adulthood has been reached. Also, I understand that 7 yrs is not a huge age gap...when you're 32 and 25. But ... (read in full...)
Awkward silences and lulls..are they ok?
Q. dear cupid, soo, i've been talking to this guy for a little over a week now, and we've been getting REALLY well. we've already hung out several times, and every time has been absolutely AWESOME. we text every day as often as we can, and that's ...
A. 4 April 2011: This is a tough one, and something I've struggled with. I've had relationships with these awkward silences and I've SEEN relationships where the couple didn't always seem to have something to say to one another...here's the conclusion I've reached: ... (read in full...)
He charmed me, so I'm back with him. What do I do if he goes back to his old ways?
Q. I broke up with my boyfriend before 4 days, because he didn't treat me well ... and since that day he always text me that he loves me and he can't live without me and he can't stand that I'm faraway from him, and he want me to get back with him ... ...
A. 4 April 2011: He will revert to his old ways bc you've shown him that he can do what he wants and get you back. You'll probably break away again, and take him back again...so on so fourth til one of you finds someone else. Have fun. (been there, done that... (read in full...)
My boyfriend who was arrested for domestic violence against me says he is changing. Can I believe him?
Q. I had my boyfriend arrested for domestic violence after he pushed me while he was drunk. We have a no contact order until his court date at the end of April. We also have a 2 year old son. Although he is not supposed to contact me or our son, he p...
A. 1 April 2011: You have not only your safety and well being to consider, but your son's as well. I realize you have the no contact order, but I would not even consider taking an abusive man back based solely on facebook posts. I would actually never take an ... (read in full...)
He lives nearby, he calls and texts everyday...Why can't we just hang out?
Q. I met this guy about a month ago. We live 15-20 mins apart, but we haven't hung out since we met. He texts me and calls me everyday, and he works here in my town. I just don't get why we can't hang out. I mean, whats stopping him? I'm starting...
A. 1 April 2011: This is strange. He must not be that interested truthfully. Maybe he has a gf and wants to keep you interested as a backup possibility? Or he's talking to another girl and actually seeing her, but again you're the backup? Maybe he just likes ... (read in full...)
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