| A
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: dear cupid,soo, i've been talking to this guy for a little over a week now, and we've been getting REALLY well. we've already hung out several times, and every time has been absolutely AWESOME. we text every day as often as we can, and that's been going pretty great, too. there's just one little problem. sometimes, we stumble upon those horrible little "awkward silences"--when neither one of us quite knows what to say and the conversation just kind of comes to a little lull. soo, i'm looking for advice about how to keep this from happening in the future. and i would also like to know if it's okayy for these lulls to happen sometimes. or, does it run the risk of destroying the relationship that we're trying to build??? any help is GREATLY appreciated.
View related questions:
text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, angelDlite  +, writes (5 April 2011):
 hi don't worry about this, or you will make it feel like a bigger problem. maybe if you texted a bit less, you might have more things to talk about when you get together. its ok to have quiet moments together, just give him a kiss or hug if you don't have anything to say at that momentxx
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (4 April 2011):
 I agree with Dirtball... you do not have to talk talk talk every minute you are together... sometimes just sitting... and being is nice.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2011): They are only awkward at first, but when you get used to each other its not a problem, and can actually be a nice experience, making them more attractive and intriguing, while increasing the bond between you as long as you do have conversations sometime.For the moment learn to relax, don't force conversation. If its too awkward just smile or laugh and it will release the awkwardness.
...............................
A
female
reader, catcher00 +, writes (4 April 2011):
This is a tough one, and something I've struggled with. I've had relationships with these awkward silences and I've SEEN relationships where the couple didn't always seem to have something to say to one another...here's the conclusion I've reached: It's only a big deal, if it's a big deal to you. It's only going to have the power to "destroy" the relationship, if it's THAT important to you and you give it that power. So..is it a deal breaker (prob shouldn't be,)? Is it so unbearable that you can't go on like this? (that's pretty dramatic.) Do you really feel like the two of you have no common ground at all? Silences can be just as comfortable as they can be awkward. Maybe, not so much the silence itself, but moreover your strong reaction to it, that is more of a threat to your relationship..and perhaps more of an indication that he may not be the guy for you.
...............................
A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (4 April 2011):
 There's nothing wrong with them, and sometimes if you're together in person they are a great moment to move in for a quick kiss or cuddle. I find the ability to be silent together yet comfortable one of the things I work toward in a relationship. Sometimes all you need is just to BE with the other person, conversation or no. As long as you do have good conversation, this isn't something to worry about. Try to relax if it happens again and just lose yourself in his eyes, or snuggle up with him.
...............................
A
male
reader, thomas1214  +, writes (4 April 2011):
no there are always silences. think about them as like a calm before the storm or calm after a storm. sometimes silence is good. it helps balance things you can think things through ect. have fun
...............................
A
male
reader, honestman  +, writes (4 April 2011):
Every relationship comes to awkward silences and lulls, so don't worry, stay calm. Those little silences won't do harm at all. It won't ruin your relationship. This guys seems so very into you!
...............................
|
