He only has one friend who clearly is in love with him, am I being selfish for wanting him to stop talking to him?
Q. Hi, my boyfriend is older than me and has no real friends, the only person in his life is his German friend/ex, I say ex because they've had sexual relations before we met, he told his wife a few years ago he was gay and she learnt to live with it, ...
A. 16 November 2011: There totally is something wrong with your relationship. It's either he has lost interest in you, or just has this greater care and attention for the German guy than you. It's like, you're just there as a caretaker, the gardener, the cook, the ... (read in full...)
Has this run it's course? Lately, it's almost like we can't be in the same room without fighting.
Q. Hey guys. First of all, I'm gay and I've been in a relationship with a really great guy for 8 months. Unfortunately, he and I have been fighting a lot lately and I don't know what to do to bring us back to normal. Even though I'm gay, I'm a pret...
A. 6 November 2011: Abella said it all.
I'll just add that, maybe he is in a phase? But I'm feeling more that he's trying to find a way to break up. Maybe the love had died? But it's clearly not in your end of the bridge cuz, as you've said, you've been trying t... (read in full...)
Can anyone help me with my confusion? I was positive that I was straight, now I'm not sure?
Q. i'm here because i'm confused about my sexuality and i don't know what to do. For awhile now i have been thinking about men, specifically kissing and having sex with them and even having a relationship with another man. I try not to but when i g...
A. 30 October 2011: Well, they've pretty much said what's there is to be said.
I'll just add a little. You should give it a try. I mean, it's never wrong to choose to discover yourself. Try to work something out with a guy. Maybe a guy really is for you, and is w... (read in full...)
I got attracted to an online guy too fast and then he deleted me!
Q. Hello dear cupiders have a problem and would really want some advice. Last friday, the curious me got the better of myself so I tried to go to some online gay chat sites. There I met tons of people ranging from oldies to guys who wants to do peop...
A. 10 August 2011: Thanks guys. I really appreciate your advices. I'm now learning to leave it behind. The somewhat disturbing pain is somehow coming to an ease. Well, at least I'm managing right? And thanks, I won't chase him anymore. I'll just let him realiz... (read in full...)
20 year old straight employee got sexually involved with me, took money and favours from me, and now his wife is pregnant and he's changed his job. I feel terribly used, betrayed and hurt
Q. OK, here's one that has to top it all. I am a boss, I met this straight man 20 years old. I am 50. This is so crazy that it is hard to believe it happened. At any rate, I told him about me, and when I did, he said, well anything is possible for ...
A. 31 July 2011: Okay, little part of it is your fault. Okay I lied, a big part of it is your fault. Honey, if you really were that strong of a person, you'd know right then and there when to stop because it's going too far. You're the boss of your life. No one ... (read in full...)
Where do I start to meet other gay men?
Q. I'm 23, have Asperger's syndrome, and although I've had some struggles in life, things have got a fair bit better over the past 2 years (well, since November 2008 to be really technical, but...). I find it difficult to make friends, unless ...
A. 31 July 2011: Ohh.. there are tons of gay people out there. The thing is, the places they live in. It's hard to have a long-distance relationship too since you can't see each other that often. That's a pretty hard dilemma you have there.
I've been having t... (read in full...)
Is this guy actually gay or am I getting played?
Q. Alright, guys. Here's the tough one, and I need to know what to do. Until recently, I've been with this girl for five and a half years. She is beautiful, caring, reserved, and I can't help but feel that she really loves me. Recently, our li...
A. 27 July 2011: ahhww... (insert teary eyed-bunny)
Well, yea, you can't do much about it now. All you could do is cross your fingers I guess. And boy, even if you two, IF EVER & in the worst case scenario, ever broke up. Then atleast, till the very end you stay... (read in full...)
B/f thinks he can control me with sex!
Q. I have a boyfriend that acts like he can control me with his d¤•k, how can I stop him from acting that without giving up sex?...
A. 25 July 2011: Wow, his d*ck's a walking joystick huh? lol, seriously, the probs not really with him. It's with you. Don't ever allow anyone to control you in a way you don't like. If this continues , fight on, learn control him with your *ss .. okay? Two can play ... (read in full...)
Why did he like me then reject me so swiftly?
Q. Hey. My question is more of a story and then a question, just so whoever reads this has some background information of how I've ended up in the situation which I'm in now. So hear we go. I am 17 and have been for a while trying to find some new pe...
A. 25 July 2011: Naa... i don't think he really liked you. He was just tasting you're cup of tea, then he got bored, and just put you aside. Being mean and nasty is just his means to send you away. Don't take it seriously or whole-heartedly, just move on. Ask one ... (read in full...)
How do I tell him or make it known I don't want to be with him and that friendship is all I want?
Q. Hello, I discovered a lad over a trusted website where people of my sexual orientation socialize. A lad message me and I liked his pictures and he seemed an amazing person. I am not over my ex boyfriend sadly even though we broke up 7 months...
A. 25 July 2011: You just have to tell him now, point-blank. It'll be hard for him to process what you're saying if you're still all cutesy about it. Tell him directly, and let him feel where he stands and stuff. Also, even if you're telling it straight to the ... (read in full...)
Is this guy actually gay or am I getting played?
Q. Alright, guys. Here's the tough one, and I need to know what to do. Until recently, I've been with this girl for five and a half years. She is beautiful, caring, reserved, and I can't help but feel that she really loves me. Recently, our li...
A. 25 July 2011: Yea, you're played. You're girlfriend .. oopss.. ex-girlfriend's a pretty good actress too! You know what, for me it seems you're girlfriend has fallen out of love for you. This happens especially to those who live together because you see each ... (read in full...)
Can a relationship last without sex?
Q. I haven't had sex yet, but I always knew I was gay. I've been trying to find the right guy, but couldn't all this 10 years. Last year I met this guy and when he noticed I was always avoiding sex he got himself checked and unfortunately he's ...
A. 25 July 2011: Dear anonymous writer,
You're situation is one of the plots I'm planning on writing about.
I salute you for keeping firm into not having sex with him because he's positive. You can't give yourself away just like that. You also need to love your... (read in full...)
Is he secretly gay? Or do I just want to believe that he's gay?
Q. I'm 20 years old and I'm bisexual. I have a friend who is pretty cool with me and at first I think I had mistaken some signals I was getting from him as just mere "bromance", but I just have this feeling in my gut that he likes me but he's too ...
A. 22 May 2011: His gay. And you should know he's into you. Just don't let that get into your head. Just be you and act like everything's normal. Wait for him to give in, swear, the dam's breaking.... (read in full...)
Is this a date? Or just 2 friends going out?
Q. Dear Cupid, I need your help with a great urgency until WEDNESDAY. Three weeks ago I started to become close with someone from my office. I am bisexual but I never fell in love with a guy before and I think he is straight. We become closer an...
A. 19 May 2011: I think he just wants to be friendly with you. Being friendly doesn't really mean he's into you or something. Never ever misinterpret his signals, you'd get hurt in the end if you expect too much though.
Go with him to this restaurant and be like... (read in full...)
How can I coax guys out of the closet and have a boyfriend again?
Q. OK, so, in March, I ended a year and a quarter length long-distance relationship to be with a guy who was in my local area, who I then got broken up with by for stupid reasons, long story xD Basically, the latter of the two was my first 'real' boy...
A. 19 May 2011: 16, hmm... and you've just got out on a long relationship... My best advice for you now is to not find one yet. Concentrate on your studies. You're now given the chance to focus more on and to fix somethings(if there is) with yourself. My less bet... (read in full...)
Not sure whether my best friend if giving off signals
Q. Hi all, i have one of the weirdest questions in the world lol. i am gay and my straight best friend is confusing the hell out of me. Basically I'm not out yet but I'm 99% sure he knows i am gay, and i have no idea if hes giving off signals. ...
A. 19 May 2011: Do absolutely nothing. Wait for him to make them move. Just continue on what you're doing and act like things are all normal. He'd realize for himself what an idiot he has been for saying all those shitty things and could possibly choose you to come ... (read in full...)
I go to private school, he goes to a public school....but I like him! What should I do?
Q. can you guys help me? this summer i took a taekwondo class and i met a few people and then there's this guy he keeps looking at me and smilling. and he asked me if he could court me, i honestly like him but there's one problem. he's from public s...
A. 6 May 2011: Girl, if you think that him, being in a public school is the problem, then maybe the thing gone wrong is you. Why make it such a big issue?
If you like the guy, then go for it, don't mind or care what your friends think. Besides, if they're peop... (read in full...)
Please help. Boyfriend and I have serious problems with sex.
Q. Hi everyone, I’m in a real dilemma at the moment, and I don’t know what to do. I’ve posted on here a few times before. I’m a 24-year-old gay guy who has been in a relationship with the same guy for over four years now. We have serious problems...
A. 3 May 2011: Other people have said most of it so I'll just add a few. If your boyfriend can't pleasure you in sex or do the things you wanted him to, then don't have sex with him at all. It's okay to be selfish sometimes because it still boils down to you. Who ... (read in full...)
Could gay/bisexual guys possibly fancy effeminate ones?
Q. First things first, I'm an 18yo gay male, and have been wondering quite a few things for a while. A description of self: I'm gay, and I've been out of the closet since the prehistoric. I act, think, and talk like a femme, and somewhat dress, b...
A. 30 April 2011: Thanks guys for all who've given advice. And I've noted you're ideas and experiences, and hopefully, apply them. I like cross-dressing.... (read in full...)
It started as something casual, now it's awfully complicated
Q. Backstory, Gay man, 21... studying at Uni. Decided before I started that I would NOT be getting into a relationship while at uni (previous experience of stress + exams = not good!). So I meet this guy 7 months back... was meant to be casual fun, a...
A. 27 April 2011: That casual-turned-complicated relationship you have is something you really need to do up with. You assess, whether it's still healthy,(for you and he) or is already creating quite a stir. Ask him, what are you guys really? Are you officially an ... (read in full...)
B/f says he loves me and then runs back to his spouse!
Q. I am in a gay relationship and love the guy I am dating. The problem is he tells me that he loves me and cares for me and wants to spend the rest of his life with he, then he runs back to his cheating ,thefting husband. I love him with all my heart ...
A. 26 April 2011: You should find someone else, who's single, and more caring. And fast! Time is running out.. tick tock tick tock..^.^... (read in full...)
My boyfriend texted a gay man saying he had "enough of chics" and I don't know what to do!
Q. OMG...I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO... I come across this message my boyfriend had sent april last year. I dont know what to make of it. I know he has never really been into sex with me... like he does it but yeh... I always just thought it was because I...
A. 26 April 2011: I really admire you're melancholy, cuz some girls, after knowing that kind of thing with their boyfriends, they'd go ballistic and wouldn't even have to time to asses the situation pretty well. YOu even went to the extent of asking what to do which ... (read in full...)
How should I handle confused/confusing bi guy
Q. So theres this guy I know because his girlfriend goes to my school and he hangs out there waiting for her so we've talked more than a few times then. He later told me he's bi and a little confused, and tn he texted me. Idk what to make of this, be...
A. 21 April 2011: Wee... he could really be into you. And at the same time, be totally confused.. We just don't know! Is the girl your friend? or just a schoolmate? Oh, be careful too of what that guy had said to you. You must be extra vigilant on sweet talks cuz ... (read in full...)
How do I talk to my unresponsive gay online friend ?
Q. So this guy I 'used to' like is giving me some doubts, making me nervous. So we "met" online, we go to school together and I found him, and now we're friends on facebook. Anyways, I guessed he was gay, hit the nail on the head, he's openly gay, lik...
A. 21 April 2011: That's nice, but I think you should refrain from doing so. He could be busy or simply not interested. And if you kind of, re-message him and stuff, he might take it the wrong way and see you as someone annoying or so chase-y(if there's such a word) ... (read in full...)
Should I just stop talking to him and not wish him a happy birthday?
Q. ok, many of you know some of the story since I have asked a couple of questions regarding to this. anyway, I met a guy online (I'm gay btw) like 2 months ago. i'm 19 and he's about to turn 24 this week. everything seemed fine at the beginning, we ...
A. 19 April 2011: Yes get him something. Greet him on his birthday. If I were you, I'd get him something,(I can't really suggest something because I don't know the guy) maybe a card/letter. I'd write in it everything, the angst I have, the love, the wanting, the apol... (read in full...)
How do I break free of the feelings of anger/resentment I have?
Q. Okay, so here's my dilemma: I'm 16 and gay, and currently having major problems regarding a guy I like. This guy, we'll call him "D" for simplicity's sake, has been the object of my affection for quite a while now (upwards of 6 months), but it's ...
A. 19 April 2011: I think when you confessed to him, it was a bit too soon. Like taking the apple pie too early from the oven. But, on a lighter note, the guy could possibly have feelings for you, yet it seems he too doesn't know how to deal and react to it. You ... (read in full...)
If he is not interested in me, why does he make such efforts with me?
Q. Hi, I just turned 30 and am very attracted to a man who is 46. I am in the US from a different country originally and am still closeted. This guy knows that I like him and we spend all our time together - we laugh, joke and discuss history ...
A. 19 April 2011: Nah.. I think that friend of yours likes you. Men vary on how they show affection to others, especially to those whom they love. Some, try to go and buy the world, while there are some who shy away. When he said, he made peace of living in solidari... (read in full...)
I need help on how to approach someone who liked me but now seems to be ignoring me
Q. hi, hears how it goes... this guy approached me whilst i was at work and i had absolutely no idea he liked me even though he had spoken to me a few times that night, at the end of the night, kick out time, he asked me for my number, i had no idea ...
A. 19 April 2011: Nice to hear that from you.. keep those fingers crossed...
YKW - You know what?? ... hehe... (read in full...)
I need help on how to approach someone who liked me but now seems to be ignoring me
Q. hi, hears how it goes... this guy approached me whilst i was at work and i had absolutely no idea he liked me even though he had spoken to me a few times that night, at the end of the night, kick out time, he asked me for my number, i had no idea ...
A. 16 April 2011: Okay first things first, don't build a world around him. You'd only get hurt if you attach yourself too close to a guy you're unsure of. Just because he showed interest in you once doesn't mean he's the only guy worth your investment. He could ... (read in full...)
I'd love to be the confident person I appear to be. How?
Q. I don't want to bang on so I will keep this brief. I have no confidence what's so ever, after years of bullying cause I used to be a bit chubby, now that I've lost a lot of weight and some what attractive I can't bring myself to date and do thin...
A. 16 April 2011: With the infos you've written, and presumably, I don't think you have anything more to worry outside.
You're biggest problem now is the way you think about things. I really advice you to; DON'T BE NEGATIVE!
Always think things positively. Things a... (read in full...)
I've fallen for a girl and not sure if it's reciprocated?!?
Q. Hi, I have been in a relationship for the last 3 and a half years, which has not been particularly healthy in the last 6 months, about 3 months ago I started doing a show(theatre) with someone I've been friends with for a long time but kind of lost ...
A. 16 April 2011: I feel a bit bad for your newly-separated girlfriend of 3 years. The years of efforts and making things work out would simply go to waste. I really don't want to see any long relationship end just like that. x.x Hmm Guys, esp. those that had b... (read in full...)
Masturbation every night. Should I get help?
Q. Hello, I'm 16 and I masturbate every night. I was wondering if this is common or should I get some help? Please help...
A. 13 April 2011: Well, as long as you're not peeking at or stealing someone's lingerie while doing it night after night, that's no biggie. Hormones tend to burst up around that age. Once you're a bit older, that wanting would somehow subside.
Still, enjoy the mome... (read in full...)
Desperate to be touched again
Q. Looking for a reality check here, particularly from people in longstanding relationships. I’ll try to keep it as short as I can, but I suppose a certain amont of background is necessary. I’m 49, been married for 25 years. The last time I was phys...
A. 13 April 2011: I might be a bit young to comment on your situation there and all. But I would like to suggest to you not to. Yea, there is that urge to feel 'it' again, but what about your family? Your kids? Your wife?
If you do it, then you'd have something that... (read in full...)
I left my alcoholic ex so why do I feel so badly?
Q. Its been 2 and a half years he drink endlessy, accused me of being with other men, disrespects me,and make me feel worthless when he questions my love for him. I love him and only him with my whole heart, mind, and soul. The drinking brings about a ...
A. 13 April 2011: That feeling of resentment must probably be because of the feelings that still lingers in your heart. Part of you wants to leave him, lead a better life and follow your dream. Yet, another part of you wants to stay, and still hopes to make things ... (read in full...)
Does he like me as more than a friend?
Q. Does he like me more than a fren? Well, i did make the first move already. I invited him to go with me to movies and even go have a dinner in a hotel... Of course, i invited but then he paid for it.. We actually talked a whole lot, he shared his ...
A. 13 April 2011: There could be something between you guys, but whatever it is I am pretty sure that it's still budding and too young, and anything too fast or too soon might truly affect in any imaginable way.
One thing is, that simple low-toned laugh might just... (read in full...)
Are these feelings for this other guy just a crush or love?
Q. hi,i have a relationship of three years and thing have been great since.my boyfriend lives far away from me because of studies.we are close to 400km apart but we visit each other every now and the.i met a guy this year and we started as friends,he ...
A. 12 April 2011: Girl, i think you're just infatuated with the guy. Maybe because you're boyfriend is so far away and you don't see him often.
But please please, don't ever pursue that forbidden/budding relationship with that guy. If you do, you're not just dest... (read in full...)
Does he like me as more than a friend?
Q. Does he like me more than a fren? Well, i did make the first move already. I invited him to go with me to movies and even go have a dinner in a hotel... Of course, i invited but then he paid for it.. We actually talked a whole lot, he shared his ...
A. 12 April 2011: For me, I think you're choking him a bit. Sorry for the bluntness, but I do think so. Hmm.. maybe he feels you've become too clingy, or too attached to him and that you're building you're world around him .. men don't like that(well atleast that's ... (read in full...)
He's asked me to a dance. is it ok to date a guy I don't have feelings for?
Q. This is a question I had thought over even before I came to this site, I just wondered if it's okay to date a guy without having feelings for him. Previously, my affiliated school's student president asked me out. Wow, back then, I was only 13 and ...
A. 12 April 2011: In your question -- i think there's nothing wrong going to the dance with that guy. But since you've already promised to a previous engagement, I don't think you should cancel it. Not unless, if supposed-to-be-date is okay if you go out with the ... (read in full...)
He says he loves me and then laughs. Is he into me or just messing about?
Q. I know I asked a similar question a few months ago but, since then, things haven't changed a whole lot with this guy I really like. I recently turned 18 and I am almost certain that I am gay. I am not out of the closet yet. If I ever do come out ...
A. 11 April 2011: For me though, it doesn't really matter if he's gay/bicurious or whatever. He probably is the type who's okay with it. There are people who see and interpret things differently. In his case, saying stuff as such, slapping the @**, or showing off ... (read in full...)
Do I continue trying to move on or do I call him and let him know my feelings?
Q. Hey I'm looking for some advise on what to do... heres my situation it's really long so please bare with me... I had been in a 2 year relationship with someone I thought was my soul mate. Things got complicated and I felt trapped (Had moved in to...
A. 11 April 2011: Woah! Stammered. Well, straight to the point, if I were in your heels, I wouldn't go and pursue it anymore. Honestly, I could even say you're previous boyfriend of 2 years was a better man than your latest. That latest ex of yours isn't worth your... (read in full...)
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