Gf is mad because she thinks I want to spend xmas eve drinking with my mates and I don't! What should I do?
Q. I need help because my girlfriend is driving me up the wall. Yesterday at some point she said she hates Xmas eve because she's 17 (I'm 21) and therefore too young to drink (in the UK) at the end of the day i text her saying do you mind if i go out ...
A. 16 October 2006: just apologize and tell her that you want to be with her on xmas eve. when you're in a relationship, she comes first - before friends. tell her this. and apologize, apologize, apologize for being insensitive and inconsiderate. (you sort of were ... (read in full...)
Fallen for my best buddy's girl! I don't know what to do...any suggestions?
Q. I have just fallen in love with my best friend's girlfriend, they really love each other and dont look like they will ever break up. Shes told me she fancys me 2 and i dont know what to do, what can i do??...
A. 16 October 2006: if you go after her, you're going to lose him as a friend. and that GOES AGAINST all the rules of friendship.... (read in full...)
I went as far as losing my virginity to him but he doesn't seem to want a relationship with me. What's happening?
Q. My problem is sorta complicated. I'm 17 and there is this boy i have strong feelings for, i might even love him. I have done things for him that i wouldnt normally do wit any one my past boyfriends. This boy lets say his name is John is not my ...
A. 16 October 2006: The bottom line is this: You are going to do what you want to do. But my feeling is that he's going to end up being a painful lesson learned.... (read in full...)
I'm starting to give up on waiting to have sex with the right person! Should I visit a prostitute?
Q. I'm starting to give up on waiting for the right person to have sex with. I can't a girlfriend because I'm unattractive (my parents say thats not true but it is) all my friends are having sex and I'm theonly one who hasn't. I read a question on here ...
A. 16 October 2006: i have 25 year old friends who are virgins. They're waiting for the right person, and when they find him, it'll be special. My first time was with a virgin (he was 21), and i was really happy about it. I think your first time should be special. ... (read in full...)
I'm 21-she's 13. I fallen in love with her and I think she likes me. She's self-harming to get my attention! What should I do?
Q. Hi, I’m a 21 year old lad who has fallen deeply in love with a 13 year old girl! I asked for advice on here a couple of months ago, read what people said and tried it but with no success and now the situation has got worse! Some people sa...
A. 16 October 2006: ok, she sounds immature and unstable. Why exactly are you attracted to this? You also sound emotionally troubled. Real LOVE is not supposed to be dramatic and emotionally draining like that. In order to know what love is, you have to love ... (read in full...)
He's 56 and in a loveless marriage. I'm 40 and he and I have had sex..am I doing the right thing?
Q. I am 40 well nearly 41 is it right to date a man of 56 (old enough to be my father) he is in a loveless marriage and loves me no worships me, we meet when we can in secret of course, we make wonderful love, we have so much ic common. We live in ...
A. 16 October 2006: BAD IDEA! You know it's a bad idea, that's why you're asking if you're doing the right thing. You're in for a lot of hurt if you let yourself be his secret lover. It may be exciting right now, but soon enough it'll start to hurt. Be honest with ... (read in full...)
He wants me to shave my fanny and I don't know how!
Q. hey i met this guy when i went to austria with the school and hes coming over to see me but he wants me to shave my vagina and i really dont no how to go about it please help its really embarsing!!!!x:X:x ...
A. 16 October 2006: My boyfriend had the same request. I thought it was strange, but I figured that I'd try it and see whether or not i liked it. If your hair is long, cut it a little with scissors or trimmers. It's easier to shave once the hair is shorter. Then just ... (read in full...)
Would it be ok if my husband said it was?
Q. I have a confession...i went out for a drink last night with a really good friend who i've known for over 10yrs and had a great time..I did not get drunk!! We had a great evening talking together we enjoy each others company (we go to quizes ...
A. 21 April 2006: i would suggest NOT having sex with your friend until you clarify things with your husband first.
your husband might have told you to go find someone else to have sex with as a defensive reply... guys get kinda touchy when you let them know tha... (read in full...)
We just moved in an argue like crazy. What if we get married and STILL argue!?
Q. My boyfriend just recently moved in together and we don't stop arguing. He alwaays thinks I am in a bad mood and it bothers him so much and he gets mad at me for being in a bad mood. Hes such a great guy and everythign but someimes he really pushes ...
A. 21 April 2006: if you 2 really want to work it out, you should definitely check out couples counseling. you seem to have begun these patterns of fighting which are VERY HARD to break out of, and you need an outsider to help you look at ways of improving these ... (read in full...)
Do you think he is cheating?
Q. I have been with my bf for 6 years and i think he is cheating, he gets texts late at night from the same woman but he just delets it and does not say anything. We don't live togather but i think she texts him often. do you think he cheating?...
A. 21 April 2006: he's definitely hiding something. he's either cheating or is dealing with an ex who won't let him go. secrecy and hiding things is no good for building trust in a relationship. talk to him and see what's up.... (read in full...)
The special pendant is arriving late...so do I just go ahead and propose to her without it? Or should I wait?
Q. Hey there. Need some quick advice. I'll be proposing to my partner very soon. But we've discused that we'll be getting our wedding bands together. I want to make it official, and ask her. Since we're getting the rings together I want to get some...
A. 21 April 2006: of course you should wait for it!! it will make the day extra memorable! i know it's exciting, but hold off until you can get everything together. a proposal is a once (sometimes twice ..) in a lifetime opportunity. Make sure it's a day she'll ... (read in full...)
Guys..a question about porn. Where do men draw the line between 'normal' and 'abnormal' porn?
Q. Advice mainly from men please! I have always felt pretty liberal over porn where women choose to display themselves or have sex as some like to it, but you 'normal' guys out there, where do you draw the line between normal and abnormal? My ...
A. 21 April 2006: The incident with your 2 year old obviously bothers you and makes you question your husband, otherwise you would not mention it. It sounds like your husband has some perverse fantasies. A couple of porno files dealing with animals or "rape" might be ... (read in full...)
How Can I Make This Long Distance Relationship Work, When She Is Being Cold?
Q. I have been engaged now for 18 months and we plan to marry in two months. We have maintained a heathly relationship over the long distance of the Altantic ocean. There is aways a little awkwardness when we see each other for the first couple of ...
A. 21 April 2006: It sounds like there's something going on with her. She might be reconsidering the relationship, and she needs to be fair to you and let you know her intentions. Ask her if she's committed, if she loves you, and if she's happy in the relationship. ... (read in full...)
I always tell my bf "I love him' , first...he never does! Why is that?
Q. Dear Cupid I'm in a relationship with this great guy and hes really nice. I recently told him I loved him and he replied that he loved me too. Since then I've said it to him a couple of times and he always agrees, but he never says it first! ...
A. 21 April 2006: There could be a lot of things going on here, depending on the age and maturity of your boyfriend. One possibility could be that he might not really love you but feels pressured to say it to avoid hurting your feelings. If you haven't been together ... (read in full...)
My cousin and I have an "attraction". Should we suppress it or make a move?
Q. I was have always felt a connection to my "cousin", his mother is my mothers half or step sister, (still unsure as to which). But recently we were at a family event together and when he left I felt a deep saddness and come to find out so did he. ...
A. 24 March 2006: i'd pursue things, just to see how well you two get along and what kind of physical chemistry you have, but keep it just between the two of you. If you really feel that you're falling in love, then most likely your families are going to find out. ... (read in full...)
Should I persue this relationship with my tutor?
Q. Hello. I'm a post-graduate student and I'm in another country studying in an exchange program. I have a lot of new teachers...and I think I'm falling in love with one of them. We only had onde nice and big chat and we like and pay attention to the ...
A. 24 March 2006: you're both adults, and you can handle it. i would wait until this person was no longer your teacher/tutor to pursue anything, though. my last boyfriend of 5 years was my tutor.... (read in full...)
Not sure I can let my best friend's older brother get married without telling him I love him!
Q. I love my best friends older brother. He is like a brother to me, only I feel more for him. He's getting married in the next year or so, and I wondered if it would be bad to tell him? Im pretty sure it wouldn't affect him profoundly (meaning, it ...
A. 24 March 2006: Don't tell him. Just let him get happily married. You'd ruin all your relationships with those people (with him, and your best friend) if you told him. Just write it in your diary, talk to all your friends about it, and move on. Why would you regret ... (read in full...)
A hidden text broke my heart. Are kisses cheating and can i ever feel secure with my partner again??
Q. 9 months ago i found a hidden text on my partner of 5 years mobile from a work colleague saying thanx for not taking advantage of me last night but i really enjoyed our kisses ... im still racked with worry that he may want other relationships ... ...
A. 24 March 2006: you have no idea what went on that night. for all you know, he could have given her chocolate kisses. it may just have been a silly text with a double entendre. but if he really was kissing some other woman, then you need to know. i definitely ... (read in full...)
Me and my bf have not had sex in 5 months and now we are fighting about it. What can i do??
Q. I have a problem in my relationship and it's regarding our sex life. My boyfriend has not been interested in being intimate with me for 5 months now. We fight about it and he can't tell me why. All he ever says is he is under too much stress. ...
A. 24 March 2006: when men are stressed or preoccupied with other things, their desire for sex goes down. why not make a sex date? that way, you become one of the things on his busy To Do list. Mention it casually, good-naturedly. Pencil yourself in on his calendar. ... (read in full...)
I don't want sex that much anymore with my partner, is this a problem?
Q. I have this problem, me and my mate of five years have always had sex regularly and just this year I just don't want to could it be because I am falling out of love or do we need to spice it up more?...
A. 24 March 2006: when i don't feel like having sex with my boyfriend, it's usually because i'm annoyed at him, upset about something, or feeling unattractive. A decreased sex drive is pointing out some sort of problem. Is there something about him that has been ... (read in full...)
I want him so badly..but he won't leave his gf! What shoulld I do?
Q. Hi. i currently work at a firm and since i have started there i have liked the look of him, but i never took any action. anyway we had a works doo at christmas and we started talking and began to get closer as the night went on. i found out that he ...
A. 24 March 2006: if it's meant to be, you two will eventually get together. you can only wait for him for so long, though. i hate playing games, but sometimes they work. why not go on dates with other guys, and let the news travel to your office buddy? maybe it'll ... (read in full...)
My fiancee keeps running hot and cold, what should I do?
Q. I have been dating this woman for 9 months and got engaged 3 months ago. We are in the process of buying a house together at present. Up to 3 months ago, we were all about each other, doing things together and loved each others company. The problem ...
A. 24 March 2006: you shouldn't have to guess about your fiancee's committment to you, especially when you're about to get married. i would stop talking about marriage and a future together, and give her space to figure out what she wants. she may be confused about ... (read in full...)
He lied about looking at porn for 3 1/2 years!!!
Q. Sorry this is a little long, but I am desperate for advice!!! I didn’t find out my husband looked at porn until after we got married and lived together (he lied to me about it for the 3 1/2 years before we married). I am 21 (still get hit on by ...
A. 24 March 2006: Good luck finding a man that doesn't look at porn occasionally. Most men do it, and as the other person said, it MEANS nothing about how much they love you or how desireable they find you.
He married you - he must love you. He's not having s... (read in full...)
Cheated with my "office man", got caught and went back to my boyfriend. Was that a mistake?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years now. We live together and I love him. For the first year or so iIwas totally infatuated with him. He was all that I lived for. We got together soon after my ex boyfriend of five years left me for a...
A. 7 February 2006: it seems like you went into your relationship kind of fast, unsure of your destination. you say it started as fun, but now you're living together?
you say you love him... but what kind of love is it when you're having sex with another man and fant... (read in full...)
Says he regrets sending raunchy texts to an ex, so can I trust he won't do it again?
Q. Hi, I'm new to all of this but would love some advice please. I have been seeing a lovely guy for 5 months. After a long abusive relationship I never thought I could love again but he has been so caring and loving. I recently found out he was sendi...
A. 7 February 2006: How exactly did you find out about these text messages? Were you going through his phone? If so, then there are some trust issues here that need to be ironed out. You need to be able to trust the man you're with.
It seems like you're still up... (read in full...)
The girl I like won't even talk to me when her ex is around, in case she hurts HIS feelings...
Q. Over the summer me and this girl became very close. We would talk every day and we hung out a lot and eventually I started to have feelings for her. All of her friends said she always talked about me and likes me but there is a problem. She and ...
A. 28 September 2005: She probably knows that her ex-boyfriend isn't over her. Thus, seeing her interact with another guy would make him feel really bad. She might not be over him either, and might want to avoid beeing seen with another guy to keep up her ex's hopes of ... (read in full...)
I'm too paranoid around my boyfriend!
Q. I'm scared my boyfriend is cheating! I'm 19 years old and I'm going out with a guy. We've been together for 6 months now. I love him so much! The thing is he has alot of contact with this girl and he says she is really nice, which makes me paranoi...
A. 28 September 2005: Trust is essential to any relationship, and it sounds like there needs to be more honesty in your relationship. You do not trust your boyfriend, which is why you are looking at his phone. He is hiding information from you, and you need to find out ... (read in full...)
My ex-girlfriend is a bit messed up, but she she says she still wants to be with me...
Q. I'm 16 I have been seeing this girl for a couple of months. She's great but she is really messed up. She does drugs and lots of other stuff. She has had lots of relationships over the last year, not all with blokes. We broke up befor the end of t...
A. 28 September 2005: I think you know what you should do. You're young, and there are still plenty of people and experiences to look forward to. She doesn't seem committed to staying in the relationship if she broke up with you and went out with some other guy. She says ... (read in full...)
Should I make a move on the hot, funny and intelligent guy I work with?
Q. I have a bf have been with him for three years in November but I am not sure how I feel about him anymore because I find he is too controlling and we have not much in common. I just started a new job and have met this new really gorgeous, funny, i...
A. 28 September 2005: I hope you've already broken up with your boyfriend and aren't just holding on to him until you get this co-worker situation worked out. It's unfair to your boyfriend, which I'm sure you're aware of. As for the co-worker situation - He seems attra... (read in full...)
Walked in on my husband with the Page Three girl and I need reassurance that all men do this...
Q. I know all men masturbate and have had numerous conversations with my Partner about this, he always said he never did it if I was in the house. Recently I was still quite sleepy so he got up to have a shower. I decided to get up shortly after and ...
A. 28 September 2005: Yes, all men masturbate and it says nothing about their character, love for you, or commitment to your relationship. They watch porn, stare at other women, and fantasize about what it would be like to have sex with them. The important thing is that ... (read in full...)
I'm feeling overworked and underappreciated... and I exploded about it...
Q. My husband and I have been constantly arguing, since he hasn't worked a steady job in over 6 months, and really doesn't seem to want to work. My son (15) and his daughter (16) both live with us, I work 7 days a week overnights. I get no help around ...
A. 28 September 2005: Take some time to calm down and revisit the topic with your husband again. Apologize for the hurtful things that were said and tell him that you care about him and want to work together towards a solution. You feel unsupported and overworked around ... (read in full...)
I slept with my boyfriend's best friend a time or two, so when I see the friend I still get the urge...
Q. I am dating this guy I've been on and off with for about 5 years, and during one of the times that we broke up, I slept with his best friend a number of times. Now, I'm back with my ex and every time his best friend is around me, I get these urges ...
A. 28 September 2005: I'm questioning why you're still in this on and off relationship. Not only has it been unstable for five years, but you also have recurring fantasies about sleeping with your man's best friend. It seems like you're not happy, committed, or ... (read in full...)
My friend doesn't want to risk our friendship, but he doesn't know how strongly I feel...
Q. I have liked one of my best friends for ages, and we flirt heavily. We are very close, but he doesn't want to go out with me cos he thinks it will ruin our friendship. The problem is I think I love him and am desperate for us to have a go at it....
A. 28 September 2005: If he really likes you, he'll try a relationship out regardless of his fears. Talk to him and find out how deeply he cares about you. If he wants to be with you, but is just really scared, then he needs to overcome those fears, which you can help ... (read in full...)
I'm a serial dater. I just keep meeting guys, getting bored then moving on!
Q. I have no problem attracting guys, but have a huge problem keeping them. I get bored easily, because after a while they start losing interest in me and I don't get what I want, so I move to the next guy. I'm talking to this guy right now and I wa...
A. 28 September 2005: You said you have no problem attracting guys, which makes me believe that you're a fairly attractive woman - guys like what they see when they look at you. You say that eventually they lose interest. This may be because the only thing that was ... (read in full...)
I didn't realise how much I still loved my ex, until he moved to my city!
Q. My first love, who dumped me after I decided to move away for school, has now - a year after me - moved to the same city. Ever since he told me that he wanted to move here I have been confused and now that he's here I realize I still love him. Do ...
A. 28 September 2005: Dont' live life regretting the things you did not do. Let him know how you feel. His answer might make you feel stupid and hurt, but it might also make you really happy. It's better to know for sure than live your whole life wondering "what if...?" ... (read in full...)
I had another sexual experience after she said to "get it out of my system." Now she doesn't trust me!
Q. Hi, I have dated someone on and off for about two years. During the summer we happened to bump into each other again. We started to hang out again, things became more serious and I told her that I loved her. However, the problems from the ...
A. 27 September 2005: Sometimes we say things we don't mean. Sure, she told you to get it out of your system, but that didn't mean she wanted you to go do it. Imagine if you were in her shoes... would it bother you, and would you have problems trusting her if you knew ... (read in full...)
My ex keeps hanging around, saying he loves me. So why is he stalling on getting together?
Q. Alex and I dated for 4.5 years, but in February 2004 I broke up with him over a petty fight. He spent the next year begging to get back together with me. When he found out that I would be going to school in Florida starting in Fall 2005, he ...
A. 27 September 2005: It's understandable that he has a lot of fear about getting back together with you, and it's really good that he's expressing it to you. Unfortunately, now it seems like he's having problems committing to a relationship with you. Something needs to ... (read in full...)
My old ex lured me back from my new ex. Now my new ex won't take me back again!
Q. hi, I really need some advice. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years. Earlier this year, I got to know a guy from work and I really started to like him. I told my boyfriend I needed a break and we split up for 2 months. In this...
A. 27 September 2005: It's understandable that your heart would go back and forth like that between these 2 guys. After all, you broke up and got with the new guy rather quickly. It doesn't seem like you gave yourself the time necessary to reflect on your old ... (read in full...)
How can I give him the unmistakable message that I'd love oral sex?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for a number of months now. I really care for him, and our relationship is perfect....well almost. We have sex most days, and although the sex itself is fantastic he hasn't once given me oral sex. I don't know ...
A. 27 September 2005: When it comes to things of this nature, it's best to talk about it. As previous responses have stated, hints don't work. You should open up and have a conversation about your sex life. You can start the conversation by bringing up something you ... (read in full...)
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