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female
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anonymous
writes: hi,I really need some advice. I have been with my boyfriend for 2 and a half years. Earlier this year, I got to know a guy from work and I really started to like him. I told my boyfriend I needed a break and we split up for 2 months. In this time myself and this new guy got together. Unfortunately I kept in touch with my boyfriend and he persuaded me to get back with him. I broke it off with the new guy and a month later decided I had made the wrong move and wanted him back. He told me that he couldn't go back. I became bitter and sent an email to a friend saying that he just wanted sex. I accidentally sent this email to him and he hasn't spoken to me since. I really love him and I want him back but he just won't speak to me. I really do not know what to do. Help....
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female
reader, MissMo +, writes (27 September 2005):
It's understandable that your heart would go back and forth like that between these 2 guys. After all, you broke up and got with the new guy rather quickly. It doesn't seem like you gave yourself the time necessary to reflect on your old relationship and get over it. This led you to be confused in your new relationship and break it off to try working it out with the old boyfriend. Now things seem really messed up. You say you really love this new guy... Unfortunately, you hurt him and your actions made him lose interest in wanting to be with you. The only thing you can do is focus on yourself... hang out with your friends, develop your interests and hobbies, and move forward. During this time you'll clarify your mind and figure out what you really want in a relationship. If you and this guy are truly meant to be, then you'll get back together. If he really loves you he'll want to work it out. People need time to think and get over their anger, though. You really need to leave him alone for now... if you keep talking to him, you're just going to annoy him and push him further away. Just focus on stabilizing and improving yourself... if he doesn't come back to you, all it means is that you were meant for someone else... someone better.
A
reader, I Dont Lie +, writes (23 September 2005):
 Accidentally sent the email to him??!! Call me crazy but I really dont think you 'accidentally' sent it to him. I think you deliberately accidentally sent it to him, if you know what i mean. You want to hurt him as u became bitter!! Look, im not judging you and i never will, but u were indecisive and now uve lost someone u dearly love because of your immatureness!! Let this be a lesson to you as I dont see there is any going back on this one, unless the new guy decides to change his mind, but I honestly doubt that!! I for one would never ever take a girl back if she left me for another guy.
As for what to do, there're many fishes in the ocean girl! So stop thinking about it (as theres nuthing you can do) and start fishing again!!
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A
female
reader, missdee +, writes (23 September 2005):
Nothing you can do about that one. You made your bed now you are going to have to lie in it. Sorry, but that's life. Ever think the old boyfriend might have just wanted you back so he could break you and the new boyfriend up?
You can't play with people. Somebody always end up hurt.
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A
female
reader, Starr +, writes (22 September 2005):
This is something that you need to get over.You have to realize that you can't play with peoples feelings you left one guy for another and now you want to leave this guy for the one you left him for before? you are going back and forth someone had to stop you.You can't make up your mind about which one you want to be with and he has had enough before it even started.My opinion is you got what you deserved now it's time for you to move on you've learned your lesson.You can't make him take you back and you can't get mad at him for something you caused.This is the game that you and your first boyfriend like to play,you can't bring a third party into it. SORRY!
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