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female
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anonymous
writes: My first love, who dumped me after I decided to move away for school, has now - a year after me - moved to the same city. Ever since he told me that he wanted to move here I have been confused and now that he's here I realize I still love him. Do I ask him if he still loves me and see if we could get back together or will I just end up feeling stupied and hurt?
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reader, pops +, writes (28 September 2005):
Nothing ventured, nothing gained Has he contacted you? Does he know you are still here? How did you find out that he has moved back? The answers to these questions might give you a clue as to whether he has any interest in renewing the relationship. Short of that, you are going to have to show the courage to contact him. Invite him out on your dime. He will probably refuse, graciously, of course, and pick up the tab. Unless he is married, or engaged, I suspect he will be interested in seeing you again. Of course, I don't know how bad the break up was, either. Was it bad? Did he break with your, or you with him? Hurt lasts a long time, and if you hurt him, expect him to not be interested in going there again. If he hurt you, why would you want to go there again?
A
female
reader, MissMo +, writes (28 September 2005):
Dont' live life regretting the things you did not do. Let him know how you feel. His answer might make you feel stupid and hurt, but it might also make you really happy. It's better to know for sure than live your whole life wondering "what if...?" Good luck!
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 September 2005): There is nothing more confusing than trying to work out what a guy is thinking!
In situations like yours you have no choice but to come right out and ask however, I think the success of being so direct is down to how you go about asking the question! I would arrange to meet up, go for something to eat a chat and catch up on things. During the evening just generally enquire is he seeing anybody right now or has he got his eye on anybody blah blah blah...then slowly turn the conversation round to you two and the 'old days', then end up with something along the lines of 'oh wouldnt it be strange us two getting back together again after this year apart,.... You will know from his reaction to that whether that is something he intends to happen! Good luck.
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reader, helpfull girl +, writes (28 September 2005):
ask him. u wont end up feeling hurt, if he moved to the same city as you out of 1000 citys there is isnt that showing something? the reason why he may of finished it in the first place is because there is no such thing as a distants ralationship i mean you never know what the other person may get up to, being distants you get use to it and adventually its like your not even together thats how many cheats are coursed these days he didnt want to face the fact of going to cheat on you! so he finished it. let go of the past and move on with the future rather with this person or with some one else that is up to you?
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