A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Why do I go through phases of finding him very attractive, and then not so much so?I love my boyfriend, and generally speaking he is a good looking guy. I find myself wildly attracted to him sometimes...and then other times...not really. I know it's shallow and I love him for who he is-and he's far from unattractive-I just go through phases where I don't feel attracted toward him.I don't understand it. I mean, if he's a good looking guy by most people's standards and I love him for who he is, why are there times when I don't find myself attracted to him? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (27 February 2014):
 When you say you don't find yourself attracted to him what do you mean?
do you mean that there are times you don't want to have sex?
that's normal. it's normal after a relationship settles down to have days or sadly even weeks, where DAILY LIFE interferes with passion and attraction for some.
A
female
reader, Nime +, writes (26 February 2014):
 This is most likely related to your hormone cycle. Do yourself a favor and look into the research done on how the reproductive cycle affects female attraction towards males. We find different types of males attractive at different points during the month and it's largely out of our control. This is why women can appear to be so 'fickle' about what type of guy they find attractive - it changes throughout the month, largely based on facial symmetry and smell. For example, women can 'smell' a male's immune system, and depending on how much it overlaps with hers, and the time of the month, will find him attractive or not attractive. The bottom line is we're still animals. Do some logging on times where you are more or less attracted to your guy and I'll bet you'll find it follows a cyclical pattern.
...............................
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (25 February 2014):
 Here's the key. You write: "I love him for who he is, why are there times when I don't find myself attracted to him?"
It's because you really DON'T "... love him for who he is." It seems that you are attracted to his APPEARANCE (by your own admission)... and your "... love (for him) for who he is" really ISN'T genuine and without compromise. IF/when you plow through that, the "answer" to your dilemma will be clearly evident to you....
Good luck...
...............................
|
