We love each other but he got drunk and kissed another girl.
Q. I really need help on this on. I'm extremely confused at mo. My bf of 3 yrs broke up recently, he kissed a girl from work, told me a few days later, said he had ruined it all, never thought he'd ever ever do such a thing, especially to me, doesn't ...
A. 7 December 2005: You need to be away from him for a while. You think, of course, that you love him and you should be with him. If you stay with him right now he will lose respect for you. When a guy TELLS you that you shouldn't be with him at the moment, that isn... (read in full...)
I am not attracted to my wife physically..should I have sex with an old gf?
Q. I love my wife very much and would never want to hurt her. We get along very well and are very connected, except for one area: sex. I am no longer attracted to her physically. In the meantime, an old girlfriend of mine has contacted me and really ...
A. 7 December 2005: Why make your life more complicated than it already is? If you want to have sex with your old girl so badly just get a separation from your wife. Don't go out and have sex with someone else and come home to her. That's just bad form. Be honorabl... (read in full...)
How can I understand the mixed messages he's sending?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have this relationship with my friend,(whose male) that i'm not sure of. I'm pretty sure I'm in love of him as I think about him all the time. However, sometimes he's my friend, other times he's more flirty and romantic, and other ti...
A. 7 December 2005: If he "used" to like you two things are true: 1. For some reason, he stopped liking you like that 2. If he liked you once, you can probably get him to like you again. Try to find out why his feelings ended so abruptly (without you ever knowin... (read in full...)
We have a son but I no longer love him...I feel stuck!
Q. I dont know what to do. I am not longer in love with my partner. We have a 3 year old son together. I haven't cheated or anything like that but I am definitely finding myself attracted to other people. We had our son very early in our relationship ...
A. 7 December 2005: Have you told him you feel stressed? If you are truly not in love with him you should leave, of course. There is no reason to stay and be miserable. Your son is very young and if you try you can make this separation very easy on him.
Before you ... (read in full...)
My long distance bf wants to meet my children..but he keeps putting it off.
Q. I am a divorced mom and I have had a long distance boyfriend that I met online a little over a year ago. We have met 2 times. He says he wants to be with me forever, but also says he never wants to marry again. He says he wants to meet my ...
A. 7 December 2005: If he wanted to meet your kids, he would have done so by now.
This man is sending you mixed messages.
He wants to be with you forever, but doesn't want to marry you (which really is just saying the same thing-legally)
He wants to meet your ki... (read in full...)
Is he cheating on me or is this drunken stupidnees on his part?
Q. I made the mistake of snooping through my bf's phone. Ever since, I can't get it out of my head he's cheating, and it's making both our lives miserable! We've been dating about 8 months, and there were texts to his ex saying "whats up babe" and ...
A. 7 December 2005: I'm sorry, but I would be happier if he sent those texts sober. Then he it could be friendship. A drunk text??
When your boyfriend was lying around bored and drunk he wanted to see his ex-girlfriend.
If he is not messing around with her he has t... (read in full...)
I can't stand thinking of my ex gf with someone else..I'm wallowing in self-pity!
Q. I'm torn up right now. My EX-gf and I have been together now for 2 1/2 years. I hurt her pretty badly a year ago when I broke up with her. I was confused at that time and felt that I needed to change. After three months apart and a rebounder for ...
A. 7 December 2005: C'mon. Grow some cahones. You hurt her, honey. She has to hurt you if you ever have a chance at getting back together. What if she didn't do this? Would you respect her as much if she just forgave everything and jumped into her arms?
She w... (read in full...)
No guy can live up to my boyfriend who died 8 years ago..I just can't feel love. Help
Q. I think my heart evaporated! I am 24 and at age 16 my boyfriend died in a car accident. I think he might have been my soulmate. I have never been able to feel love since I just never feel anything. I have him on a pedestal and no one has ever come ...
A. 7 December 2005: Maybe he was your soul mate. That doesn't mean that you can't be happy with anyone else. Be careful that you aren't hanging on to the idea with him to avoid having to become close to anyone else. I know you are scared that the next one will leave ... (read in full...)
Why do bright attractive women fall in love with married men? Help me understand
Q. I am a 38 yr old attractive, intelligent woman. My problem is that I am in love with a married man. His marriage is loveless there is no physical contact and has not been for 3 years. He has 2 children 11yrs 4 yrs owns his own business and ...
A. 7 December 2005: The real reason women do this? It is the perfect relationship--mostly. Sociologically speaking, married men live longer than single men. Single women, however, live longer than married women (it is true--look it up!). You love it because you get ... (read in full...)
My husband hates my job, spends all the money-I pay for everything and I feel used!
Q. dear cupid, i met my husband when i was 17 he was 21 i was and still am an exotic dancer. He has been with me for 8 years and knows all about it. i have never cheatd on him. we have 2 kids together he is always throwing my job in my face but he ...
A. 7 December 2005: First of all, you may want to get him some counseling, it sounds like he may actually be bipolar. However, before we becoming diagnosing donnas, we should look at what's going on with your job. He obviously likes to throw it in your face to make ... (read in full...)
Do I lie or tell my Mom the truth about my online friend?
Q. Hello all, a fast response would be appreciated, im 19 and i have been talkin to a guy on the net but my mom doesnt approve so i havent told her yet and he asked to meet to talk and he wants to be friends. The bad thing is its in two days and i dont ...
A. 7 December 2005: The question is: why doesn't your mom approve? Is he some lecherous aging gangster? Or does your mom simply not like you dating? You can tell her now or wait for her to find out--which she will if this continues. It is almost impossible to hide ... (read in full...)
I am crazy about her...but she has a male friend. Do I end this?
Q. Hello I divorced some seven years ago and have had a hard time coming to terms with this as I suffered a breakdown quite soon after, in fact it has taken up until recently to really get over my ex wife. In terms of new relationships I ...
A. 6 December 2005: There are many factors to consider in terms of opposite sex friends: 1. How long have they known each other? If it is less than 3 years or so, he is probably still trying to sleep with her, diminishing the level of understanding yo... (read in full...)
She had an abortion...should I have broken up with her?
Q. I recently started seeing a girl, however she told me she had an abortion with her previous boyfriend after two weeks after we had been going out it killed me! i couldnt believe that this girl who i had spent time with came out with this, she was ...
A. 6 December 2005: The only reason to break up with her is if you are so morally opposed to an abortion that it hurts your sensibilities to be with her. If, however, you are one of our modern day believers in women's rights, you have no standing to end it. Here's a ... (read in full...)
My best friend doesn't know that I'm bisexual... or that I'm interested in her...
Q. My best friend and I have known each other for about 2 years (we are both teenage girls). I have never dated or kissed anyone, but I thought I was straight. She has had loads of boyfriends, she's popular, pretty, confident and flirty but I am quite ...
A. 6 December 2005: Understand that she probably has no idea you feel this way and probably doesn't feel the same way about you. What is really striking here is not her, but you. You have started to realize that you may have romantic feelings for girls, which is ... (read in full...)
I'm so shy that I'm afraid I'm coming across as "cold"!
Q. I’ve met a guy who I think is wonderful. In fact, I would go as far as to say he is ‘the one’ - trouble is, I am extremely shy. I find it really difficult initiating and continuing conversations with people generally, but in particular to people I ...
A. 6 December 2005: You need to hang out with him in group situations. With all of your friends, etc. Also, a venue with some distractions always takes the heat off and makes it so you don't have to be outgoing. Suggest an outing to the zoo (having a kid with you ... (read in full...)
Can I get pregnant through irregular use of the pill?
Q. I have been sleeping with my boyfriend for 4 months now and i love every second of it, i have been on the pill and also been taking other mecicines. For the last week i came off the other medication and back on the pill... i been back on the pill ...
A. 6 December 2005: Birth control can be rendered useless with some other medications, for example, antibiotics. Irregular use also hampers its effectiveness. To be safe, whenever there is a month when you are irregular, use a second form of birth control, like a ... (read in full...)
I got drunk and did a sex video-my ex is blackmailing me with it! Help.
Q. I got really drunk at a friends house and ended up having a 4 some w/ 2 guys and a girl. We all took turns video taping it and now Im in trouble. My ex bf, who is also my son's dad, was in the video and it was his camera we were using. My problem ...
A. 6 December 2005: Don't let your baby daddy manipulate you like that. What he is doing is extortion and it is illegal. Trust me, if you can get him to put down in writing (printed email, note, recorded phone call) that he will expose the tape to your ex unless you ... (read in full...)
This guy sends me mixed messages...I feel so lost!
Q. hi, im totally lost and have no idea what to think about my guy. I have known him for about 3 months but we have began a relationship about a month ago. I was hesitant form the start because he is a player. all the girls like him he's good looking ...
A. 6 December 2005: Your problem is that you are having a normal relationship--with an abnormal male. It is perfectly ok, and may even result in a healthy and strong long term relationship but you have to adjust your behaviour to his. He is obviously making ... (read in full...)
She has a boyfriend but kissed me...what do I do?
Q. Hello basicly I was seeing this girl in the summer around 4-5 months ago I realy liked her even though I only saw her for a short period of time . She has a boyfriend now of 4-5 months but i have kept in contact with her and on more than one ...
A. 5 December 2005: You are in the prime position of a man trying to get a girl with a boyfriend. You have gotten her to cheat, which is not only because of you, but also because of him. (no happy woman cheats). Your job now is to play aloof. She will have to make ... (read in full...)
When I meet someone-at first, I can't get enough of them...then I get bored too fast and they turn me off!
Q. I meet someone and all of a sudden I just cant live without seeing and talking to them everyday. It lasts until they start to bore me or somehow just turn me off. But usually its when they start to get to close to me and I just dont want them in my ...
A. 5 December 2005: You want to be in love, but you are more interested in playing at love. If you act as if you are in love with someone, for example, seeing or talking to them constantly when you begin dating, it is only natural that the other person will fall in ... (read in full...)
Why can't I get my girlfriend's past sex life out of my head?
Q. Hey out there, I'm going crazy. Well I'm having trouble with my girlfriend's past. She has had sex with 15 other guys and had sexual relations with at least 6 more. I try not to bring it up but it comes up in my head a lot, to the point where I get ...
A. 3 December 2005: You two are not right for each other. You need a woman you can be proud of and if you are this worried than you are not open minded enough to accept who she is. You need a woman who you don't have to worry about and she needs a progressive man who ... (read in full...)
I want her but she pushes me away...what do I do?
Q. Hi, i'm Chris (17) an i have a female friend (17)called Sam, we are friends and have become very close lately, she has had a few problems and she pushes people away sometimes because she thinks people don't care about her, she is such a beaut...
A. 1 December 2005: This is not about you. She is going through a tough time and wants to be able to lash out and know that someone does care. She knows you care, and she pushes you away because it makes her feel secure that you come back. She is feeling like the ... (read in full...)
In the 5 years of our relationship, we've only ever had 30-second sex!
Q. I am 25 and have been going out with my boyfriend for 5 years. I have been avoiding bringing up our issues with him cos I think it will make the problem worse and I felt that there were more important aspects of our relationship that mattered more. ...
A. 1 December 2005: Men can orgasm as soon as they wish. It sounds as if he doesn't care that you are not having a good time. Unless he has a medical problem there is no reason why he would be consistently pre-ejaculatory unless he is simply having sex with you to ... (read in full...)
My husband spends time with our female friends without me
Q. My husband goes out and spends time with our female single friends with out me, at night for hours. I am not a jealous type but they show him the sexy underwear they buy and fawn all over him. Is it fair for me to be upset with them for crossing ...
A. 1 December 2005: You definitely have a problem. You must be very careful in dealing with it--make sure to cover all your bases or you could upset everyone you love and come off looking like a loon.
First things first: Of course your husband knows on some lev... (read in full...)
Six months of dating and he's so wonderful...is this too good to be true and will it last?
Q. There are times when my bf seems to good to be true: meaning that he listens, is considerate, takes time to come see...we've been going out for about 6 months..could I confidently say that this is a part of his character and be confident this good ...
A. 1 December 2005: I was in the exact same place as you . . .and then I made a grave mistake. I kept telling myself he was perfect and I made unreal standards for him. I kept waiting for him to mess up. Of course, he could feel it and so he was walking on eggshells ... (read in full...)
Feels like I can't compete with my boyfriend's relationship with his ex!
Q. Okay so here's the story. I'm 17 and my boyfriend's 18. We've been dating for 10 months now. His last relationship ended about two years ago. Him and his ex were together for two years. At the beginning of our relationship he would always talk about ...
A. 1 December 2005: It definitely sounds as though he was still in love with her when he started dating you. You know what that makes this--a rebound relationship. You can hope to turn a rebound relationship into a long term sure thing but that would be some kind of ... (read in full...)
My husband just isn't affectionate. No cuddles, no sex... I feel so unloved!
Q. My husband and I have been married 22 yrs. But, we have known each other since I was 13 and he was 15. We started having less and less sex about 2 yrs. ago. He was having problems keeping an erection. About 4 months ago he had to have a triple by...
A. 5 November 2005: There are many reasons a man would act this way. He could be unfaithful. In addition, if you met him and when you were on birth control and now currently are not, (or vice versa) it could be a result of hormone problems. Studies have shown that ... (read in full...)
When we meet, we can't keep our eyes off each other. It's just that we're both with other people...
Q. Hi, I desperate for some advice because I'm so confused over this situation. Basically I met this bloke when I was 17 and he was 26. He's part of the regular town social scene and although he's not that amazing looking I'd always had a bit of a ...
A. 5 November 2005: If he wanted you as badly as you wanted him he would want to be with you. In a real way. And he would make an effort not to make you feel used.
You are with your boyfriend because under it all, you know that.
Try not hooking up with him the next... (read in full...)
We only have time for sex now and then, but we cuddle often. Are we abnormal, like my friend says?
Q. I have been happily married w/ my husband for the past 2 years. ours was a love match and we were together for 5 years. Though we are from different backgrounds, economic, social and caste, our families get along great too. in short life is perfect. ...
A. 5 November 2005: People unfortunately believe that the state you are in signifies a dead relationship. This is entirely untrue. You are in a comfortable phase, and are complacent. There is nothing wrong with being happy. People as mistaken, as the true ... (read in full...)
My husband has said he wants to wait to have sex... until we're 60!
Q. I am 24 and my husband is 29. I promised to him that we would not have sex until we were married, as we are both virgins. Now he's saying that he doesn't want sex with me until we're in our early 60s - and I find it odd. He said to me that he me...
A. 5 November 2005: There is always a problem if your husband does not want to consumate the relationship. There is a concrete reason that he is not telling you. You are married and in love, as two adults. Consider possibilities. He may have a madonna/whore complex ... (read in full...)
We're broken up, but I can't get my ex to leave my house!
Q. I split up with my partner last week, as things weren't going too well, but now this person just won't leave my house. I have asked but I'm trying to get her out the house without hurting any more. How can I get her to leave? Also there's someone ...
A. 4 November 2005: You are a sweetheart for being so considerate of your ex's feelings but it is time you realized that if she didn't want the relationship to end, she will not leave the house until she has some sort of closure. You could either wait for this ... (read in full...)
During sex, my boyfriend says he sometimes doesn't "feel anything"...
Q. My boyfriend says he mostly can't feel anything when we make love, yet when it is good, it can be amazing and he can feel me (he also says I don't always move correctly which affects things). It has got to the point now where he will pull off duri...
A. 4 November 2005: Well, a surefire trick to temporarily inject lust into the bedroom is to try something new . . .that turns YOU on. When he sees you getting excited, odds are that he will get turned on as well. It is hard to have sex when you are in your own head, ... (read in full...)
We couldn't agree on some big issues, so we mutually agreed to end it. Mistake or not?
Q. My girlfriend and I were virtually perfect for each other. Everybody thought that we were the perfect couple. However, there were a couple of things that we disagreed on and we couldn't compromise. Religion, our life's goals, and location (she's a ...
A. 4 November 2005: Of course it was. The two of you decided that you had very different dreams. If your love was more important than those other life choices niether of you would have allowed the breakup to proceed. You both know you can't be together and that ... (read in full...)
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