I don't want to go to my husband's father's funeral because the women he had an affair with will be there, is this wrong?
Q. My husband has been having an affair with a friend of his family. This has been going on for a while and although my husband is sorry I am still trying to come to terms with it. This lady is well liked by his family and I have never met her. My ...
A. 5 January 2011: I think if you had a good relationship with your father-in-law, then out of respect you should consider attending.
If you didn't have a good relationship with him, then if the family still likes this other woman AND were aware of your husband'... (read in full...)
There is a chance my little girl may not be mine, how do I handle this?
Q. My girlfriend and me have been together for nearly 3 years and we have had our ups and downs but we always stay together because we love each other. We have just had a baby together and now it turns out that she slept with someone else around 9 ...
A. 4 January 2011: Until a blood/dna test is done, there is no way to know for sure (if that's what you want). But even afterwards, you are the only one who can decide whether or not you want to continue raising this child. Definitely NOT something that can be ... (read in full...)
When guys ask women about their sexual pasts, do they really want an honest answer?
Q. This question seems like a no-brainer at first... who's going to say they DON'T want honesty? But then I read all the posts on here from people (mainly guys, it seems) who are insecure about what their partners have done before them, and with whom, ...
A. 4 January 2011: Depends on the guy really but I think Odds below hit it perfectly. Beyond that, if he wants numbers fine but best to leave out the details. ... (read in full...)
How can I have safe sex without the use of birth control and condoms?
Q. how can I have safe sex without the use of birth control? My boyfriend doesn't like to use condoms and I trust him to pull out but sometimes I'm afraid. I would like to be on birth control but I can't be prescribed because I'm on chemotherapy pil...
A. 2 January 2011: There is no safe way. Sooner or later you will get pregnant. You're boyfriend may not like condoms, but if he really cared about you, he'd use them. ... (read in full...)
He's angry because he found my diary from BEFORE we were together that has pictures of an ex!
Q. soo my bf was looking for something in the spare bedroom and came across my diary. Which of course had pics of my ex and the last time i wrote or even looked in the diary was before my new bf and i were even together! He said he didnt read it...just ...
A. 1 January 2011: You had a life before you met your current boyfriend as I'm sure he had as well. If everything (the diary entries, pictures, etc) was done BEFORE you met him like you said, then it's none of his business. The bigger issue was his lack of respect ... (read in full...)
How do you break a relationship that isn't honest to start with?
Q. I've been in an open relationship with someone for almost 3 months but I've been treating it as if it was a real relationship. I know open relationships are shallow and I really hate them but she didn't want a real one. The worse thing is that I ...
A. 25 December 2010: Just tell her it isn't working for you and think its best you both go your seperate ways. I did something similar for a woman I loved with all my heart. She liked me but never reciprocated the feelings I had for her. I stayed in that open ... (read in full...)
Why was he so quiet during oral sex?
Q. I hadn't seen my boyfriend of 11 months, in 6 days. When we met up, I thought I'd surprise him with a blow job, our first, and because I was on my heaviest day of period. I did not feel comfy with regular sex. It was amazing for me, and I hope for ...
A. 21 December 2010: Just because he was quiet does not mean he did not enjoy it. If he didn't, I'm pretty sure he would not have asked you to do it a second time. Some guys might just react differently for different sex acts. I can be a little vocal during ... (read in full...)
Emotionally upset with boyfriend after anal sex and his past with prostitutes.
Q. I am feeling upset and insecure in my relationship of 10 months now. My partner is 53 and I am 38. He told me early on in the relationship that he went to prostitutes when he was in his 38 for about 3 months but stopped because he was wasting his ...
A. 16 December 2010: From what I can gather, between the prostitutes, the porn and the desire to have sex so often, he may be a nice guy but he seems to be way too occupied with sex. Maybe he does have a good libido, but I'd wager he's taking something because most ... (read in full...)
I'm not a virgin and that bothers him, we are starting to get 'physical' but I'm concerned about the arguments.
Q. I have been with my boy friend for a year we are getting physical now but there is a problem. I am not a virgin and he is, and that bothers him so we always get in arguements for that reason. What should i do if we fight alot but still want to get ...
A. 16 December 2010: I think it's a combination of feelings of jealousy and inferiority on his part, though he has no reason to feel either. Some guys can deal with it, some can't. Perhaps his age is contributing to it, but seems to me he simply can't deal with "the ... (read in full...)
Should I try to help my sister or just let her get on with things?
Q. I'm very concerned about my younger sister, she's recently turned 18 and has moved in with her boyfriend of 6 months. What worries me is the fact that their relationship is not stable; they have both cheated on eachother within the 6 months of being ...
A. 15 December 2010: As the older sister, you can definitely talk to her and express how you feel, what she should be aware of and any concerns she may not be thinking of. But ultimately, she's 18 years old. Sometimes the only way some people can learn is to make the ... (read in full...)
Why is it so hard to let our first loves go...?
Q. Hello im going thru some crazy times, but im sure a lot of other people are too. I just wanna know why is it soo hard to let our first loves go? He says he will go if thats wat I want and i cant give him a straight answer. I know we cant work ...
A. 11 December 2010: It's always difficult to walk away from someone you truly love, especially when you are doing it for the first time and have no experience on how to deal with the situation. It will take time, maybe longer than you want, to get over it. But you ... (read in full...)
She doesn't like to hear "I love you" Why?
Q. My girl friend doesn't like to hear me say i love her,why?...
A. 21 November 2010: Has she ever said those words to you before? If not, it's possible she doesn't want to hear them because then she feels obligated to respond and its not how she feels or maybe it's hard for her to say/express how she feels.... (read in full...)
Swinger wanting to be monogamous with me!
Q. ok this is gonna sound really weird but anyways. i met this guy a couple of months ago and we both hit it off. a few days later he told me that he was a member of swingers club i was like oh cool. it doesnt really bother me i was happy that he was h...
A. 12 November 2010: Is it possible he wants to 'give away his thrills for you?' Absolutely. Maybe that's his way of proving to you he doesn't need or want anyone but you. But you shouldn't think of him as giving away something he wants because it's unlikely he ... (read in full...)
Should I dump the girl I love to go for a hotter girl?
Q. Hi I am currently in a relationship with someone I love. My friends say she is gross and ugly. A "hotter" girl likes me but I don't like her. Should I dump my current gf and go for the other one?...
A. 15 October 2010: Is this a serious question? If you are happy with someone, why are you letting your friends' opinions dictate your life?... (read in full...)
How long should we wait until he introduces me to his children?
Q. So I'm 19 my boyfriend is 33 and has 3 kids. I was wondering when would it actually be the right time for him to introduce me to his children. He has 2 girls, one is 9 and the other one is 2 and he also has a boy but he's about 10 I'm really n...
A. 13 October 2010: I don't think there's anything wrong with talking about it with your boyfriend, so you both know where you stand on the issue. But ultimately, this is something that only he can decide and he should do it only when he feels both he and his children ... (read in full...)
EX FWB partner says he doesn't see you enough?
Q. Why would an EX FWB who has a gf and has been with her a while just suddenly say "i don't see you enough :(" i have stayed in contact with this person as friends. Are they hinting at something?...
A. 11 October 2010: It's possible this guy's girlfriend isn't as good at sex as you are and he misses that. But it's also possible he thinks of you as more than just a "friend." ... (read in full...)
He slept with a girl while we were broken up, is that cheating?
Q. I'm so confused with the situation I am in now with my boyfriend. I broke up with him in May because I felt that he was way too overprotective with me..that it always lead to arguments. He kept asking to come back and I always said to give it some ...
A. 9 October 2010: If the two of you were broken up at the time he was with other girls, no it is not cheating. ... (read in full...)
Does playing hard to get work on a shy guy?
Q. So this guy and I have a tiny bit of history, ie one night (just kissing). Anyway now he's acting like a bit of a prat. He is the one that didn't want a relationship, no matter how casual. So the other night we were out together because we have a ...
A. 9 October 2010: If he is really shy, I think it's a risky choice. He may not take the bait. Or worse, he may not even recongnize what you're doing. ... (read in full...)
FWB turning into a dating situation?
Q. For the past two months are so I've been engaging in a friends with benefits. He and I started seeing eachother after we met for the first time through mutual friends. Neither of us were really looking for relationships, we ended up enjoying ...
A. 8 October 2010: From the picture you paint he definitely seems to have developed feelings for you. If you don't want to lead him on, the best thing is to talk to him. Better to get it out in the open and deal with it now than down the line.
best of luck... (read in full...)
Has anyone used sex toys to acquire multiple penetration with your partner?
Q. Has anyone used sex toys to acquire multiple penetration with your partner? He would like this too. I would like multiple penetration without the guilt, and problems of asking other people into our bedroom....
A. 6 October 2010: My ex-gf loved using toys during our playtime. She loved the feeling of being DPed but I had NO interest in inviting anyone else into our bedroom. So it was a great compromise.... (read in full...)
I am ignored when girlfriend is stressed, what am I doing wrong?
Q. When my girlfriend of 5 years gets stressed at work mainly she practically ignores me but continues doing things with her son family and friends and then get annoyed when I raise this issue and accuses me of not being supportive, what am I doing ...
A. 6 October 2010: I was in a somewhat similar situation with my ex-gf. I did my best to be helpful and supportive but she seemed to want her space when it came to us in those siuations. So in that regard I agree with Fishdish, give her space IF that's what she ... (read in full...)
Husband after marriage asked about my past and then served me with divorce papers!
Q. My husband and I are married for 10 months. Right after we got married he strictly asked me if there was anything about my past I wanted to share. So I believe in you marry your best friend and I told him somethings that I had done that I'm not so ...
A. 5 October 2010: I don't believe in lying but I believe our past is our past and there's nothing wrong with keeping a few things for ourselves.
As to your experience, call me flat out wrong but reading your story I get the feeling that once you were married,... (read in full...)
Weird behaviour -- is she breaking up with me, or pregnant?
Q. I have been dating this girl for almost a year now. The situation is complicated. She is married, her husband knows it is over. They sleep in seperate rooms just in the same house until her house sells. Neither one of them can afford to the morgage ...
A. 4 October 2010: I wouldn't jump to any conclusions yet. It's only been two days, could be any number of reasons she hasn't been in contact. ... (read in full...)
It hurts like hell, how do I get over him?
Q. I ended my relationship with my lover 2 weeks ago and im trying to forget him but its hard.I miss him and i have crying spells but i had to end it because i felt that it was all one sided.How do i get over him? Because its hurting like hell....
A. 30 September 2010: I think as in all deep relationships, time is the only cure. You can certainly help yourself by putting your mind to other matters (hobbies, friends, work, etc), but in the end time is the best healer.... (read in full...)
I need to get over my ex so I can move on and give my heart to my new guy
Q. ok so i dated a guy for 2 1/2 years! i did everything for him. bought everything, just showed him my love, gave him my whole heart.but he did nothing for me. never held my hand or told me how pretty I was, and he was controling. so i broke up with ...
A. 30 September 2010: If you're trying to forget you ex, maybe being friends and texting with him "all the time" isn't helping. ... (read in full...)
I think my very conservative mother found my vibrator!
Q. Hi everyone! I used to live with my extremely conservative mother, but last year I decided to move to my mother's empty loft. She agreed because the alternative was to live farther to where she lives and we like spending time together every other da...
A. 30 September 2010: If your stated age is correct, 26-29, you are an adult. What you do is your choice, not hers. I wouldn't bring it up at all and if she does, don't worry about it as you have nothing to be ashamed of. ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend says she wants an open relationship?
Q. My Girlfriend want's an open relationship and i don't. We have been together for 3 years and are gonna get engaged and married. Still she is barely able to see me because of my job and college. I don't know what i should do....
A. 30 September 2010: If the two of you have been together for 3 years but you just don't have the time to give her (I'm sure despite your best attempts), is it possible this is her way of trying to manipulate you into giving her more time? Moo is right, if the parties ... (read in full...)
I am not sure how to tell my parents about my 10 years older than me boyfriend
Q. Okay this is going to sound odd at first but im 19 and my bf is 29. I will be 20 next month. He just turned 29. I am not one for age if its reasonable like this....but how am I suppose to tell my parents? I dont want them to judge me or him....
A. 29 September 2010: Provided you started seeing him after you turned 18, you're are an adult and free to make your own decisions.... (read in full...)
Why haven't I heard back from him? I made it clear it was just casual.
Q. A few months ago I slept with a guy in another state that I had just met. He is a family friend of the friend I was visiting the state with. He had literally JUST broken up with his girlfriend, so I wrote it off when I saw him two weeks later and ...
A. 27 September 2010: I understand what you wrote to him. But again, it's just my opinion, but it could very well be interpreted that you are looking for just sex...in hopes that it might turn into something more. And as far as the exchanges you had with him about ... (read in full...)
Broke up with boyfriend of 6 years because he wouldn't propose!
Q. First of all, this really sucks. I have been with my boyfriend for six years and we have been through a lot. I'm currently in graduate school and he moved to be with me. The only problem is he hasn't proposed. It's not like he's one of those guy...
A. 26 September 2010: If you truly love him, why did you break up with him solely over the issue of proposing? It sounds like you are more interested in the idea of being married than actually being with someone you love. Everybody looks at marriage differently but in ... (read in full...)
Why haven't I heard back from him? I made it clear it was just casual.
Q. A few months ago I slept with a guy in another state that I had just met. He is a family friend of the friend I was visiting the state with. He had literally JUST broken up with his girlfriend, so I wrote it off when I saw him two weeks later and ...
A. 26 September 2010: You may not want a "real relationship" but if it was just a hook-up before, maybe by talking about doing more than just having sex now, that's how he is seeing it. That you are trying to turn a one-time(?) hook-up into a relationship, even if that ... (read in full...)
Am I being ridiculous for asking him to never stop in on the "boys" after work and just come straight home?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have been married to my husband for almost 10 years. For the most part we get along really well. I consider us being very close friends. I always find it important that we make sure that our needs are being met in our relationship...
A. 26 September 2010: There's nothing wrong with wanting to spend time with your husband. In fact after 10 years of marriage, that's great. But like the previous responder said, wanting his time every day and denying him the opportunity to spend some time with ... (read in full...)
I'll never be the "wild ride" she had with others!
Q. I just can't get over my girlfriends past. It's not that I have an issue with the fact she's had sexual partners before me, or even that she had great sex with them. It's the fact that those relationships were almost purely sexual, and the sex was ...
A. 25 September 2010: You seem to place a high value on sex (as opposed to love). She said you're the best love she's had, but maybe not the best sex. Well, if she was looking for the best sex and only the best sex, she wouldn't be with you. Right? She wants to be ... (read in full...)
Ex broke up with me 5X and now wants to try again
Q. here we go, my ex boyfriend who ive been dating for about a year (on and off) but not dating anymore, just told me he loved me , i know somwere i will always have a place for him in my heart but he broke up with me 5 times within our relationdhip. ...
A. 14 September 2010: If your boyfriend broke up with you twice, my question is why did you try 3 more times? You can keep going back but I don't think things will ever change. As for this new guy, if you like him, what difference does it make if others (including your ... (read in full...)
I'm 18, he's 40. Can it work?
Q. hi! my agony is that i just met a man online, i am still 18 and he is 40 years old. now the problem is i have been searching for many years of my love and i think i found him. we respect our age differences, we feel compatible with each other now. ...
A. 14 September 2010: It's entirely possible that the two of you may have that once in a lifetime connection and have a really great relationship.
But forgive me for being cynical, but most 40 year old men who are interested in 18 year old women (who are also vir... (read in full...)
Uncomfortable in an interracial relationship?
Q. Is it normal to feel a little uncomfortable in interracial relationships at first? I'm white and he's Chinese, and he's really sweet. It just seems kind of awkward sometimes like if he wants to kiss me in public or something or hold hands when ...
A. 13 September 2010: If you are uncomfortable being with him solely because of his ethnicity, which is definitely how your question reads, then you should just move on now. ... (read in full...)
Should be concerned if my partner meets other guys without telling me, even if it is purely friendship?
Q. Should be concerned if my partner see's other guys without telling me, even if it is purely friendship? My partner sees other guys without mentioning to me that she is doing so. This all came to a head last week when we nearly finished our five yea...
A. 13 September 2010: I think trust has clearly been broken. There is nothing wrong with having friends. But if your partner is purposely lying or trying to decieve you about them, something is wrong. If it is purely friendship, why lie???
And as far as the coun... (read in full...)
How do I get my husband to enjoy showing off his sexy wife?
Q. Hey all some advice please, so thanks to good genes and hard work I have a good body and I love showing it off. I like the looks I get and it gives me a lot of confidence. Some people might say I dress like a slut but that's their opinion and I do...
A. 12 September 2010: Did your husband "enjoy" showing you off when you were dating? If not, you're not going to get him to change now. Besides what makes you think he isn't proud to be with you now? ... (read in full...)
Fell in love with a married woman who says that God wants her to work on her marriage!
Q. My story started about 6 months back when I met this girl at my work. I felt an immediate attraction to her. It wasn't just a physical one either, I mean she had the perfect personality type to me. We started talking and flirting back and forth at ...
A. 9 September 2010: I can understand what you mean about being with a woman who is the first one to show you affection in a way no other has. But you shouldn't let that affect your judgement. If you want to be her friend, fine. It sounds like she really values your ... (read in full...)
Haven't heard from LDR guy in 3 days
Q. Once again I need some help from My Agony Aunts. I'm in a LDR for 6 months now. It has its trials but I love my b/f enough to make us work. Now I have not heard from hi in three days now. No message, phonecall, emails nothing. What in the world is ...
A. 27 August 2010: Having been in a LDR, I know how you feel. But it could be anything; maybe he's been caught up with work, family matters, maybe there was a personal emergency. I'm guessing the two of you talk everyday, otherwise not hearing from him in three days ... (read in full...)
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