A
female
age
30-35,
*ensesfail101
writes:Hello im going thru some crazy times, but im sure a lot of other people are too. I just wanna know why is it soo hard to let our first loves go? He says he will go if thats wat I want and i cant give him a straight answer. I know we cant work together but i love him! Is anyone in the same boat as me??? I cant let him go but staying will make things worse! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): ~CHOICE~
Now that I know what it is to be in love, I will turn my back to it and walk away with the first red flag of it potential m(erialization.
~I DON'T PLAY RUSSIAN ROULLETTE~
A
male
reader, lionelhutz +, writes (11 December 2010):
It's always difficult to walk away from someone you truly love, especially when you are doing it for the first time and have no experience on how to deal with the situation. It will take time, maybe longer than you want, to get over it. But you will eventually get over it and move forward a stronger person.
best of luck
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A
female
reader, alexia846 +, writes (11 December 2010):
i am on the same boat, with him for five years, but i know deep down it cant work, im not happy.. CHECK YOUR VALUES. WHAT ARE YOUR VALUES. SUCCESSFULL COUPLES SHARE THE SAME VALUES.. its tough i am going through it right now but sometimes ppl dont speak the same language. let it go if it is meant it will come back okay
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (11 December 2010):
 It's always hard to let someone you love go. Be that your first love, second love, third love..., 10th love. When you love them it is always that hard.
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): hello sweetie,
i know exactly how you feel... its so so hard...
the way i see it is...
when you part from someone you love.. there is parts of you that hold on to that person and its hard to get rid of wanting and longing for that persons affection and love..
loosing someone you love... is like greivng... it takes time to build yourself back up again... sometimes it feels like your never be able to move on and it hurts...
just dont be afriad to cry, crying is a form of healing, if you know your not rite for one another but you still love him .. this must be so heart braking for you but my advise is concentrate on yourself.. and build yourself back up as a person, be strong and consentrate on what else is important in your life.. if you have a dream of any sort go and follow it.. focus on your future.. and put yourself 1st..
it seems impossible and you wont beleave it now.. but this will get easier and you will look back on this situation and reilise everything happens for a reason.
this will make you strong!!
x
karla
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A
female
reader, hijacked_dignity +, writes (10 December 2010):
 I was on the same boat you are, and I think everyone has gone through this before. It's really hard, I know, but you have to believe me when I say that there are better loves out there for you that you have yet to find.
If you really know deep down that you two aren't meant for each other, it's time to move on and let go. It's going to be really hard getting over him, but it will be worth it in the end. Our first loves are so hard to let go because we are in love with the idea of spending the rest of our lives together with one person. You have to stop saying that you 'can't' let him go, because you can. Everything is a choice. Obviously things aren't working out, and you need to let go.
I broke up with my first love after being with him for almost two years. I was a wreck for weeks, and I still think about him every now and then. I thought I'd never be happy again and that I'd never find anyone that was as 'good' as he was to me. Now I'm in my second serious relationship in my life and I know now what love is, and I realize how bad my first relationship was. My current boyfriend loves me so much, I am so thankful that I ended it with my first (as hard as it was).
So start getting some confidence and break the relationship off if you know it's over. Give yourself plenty of time to heal and start seeing new people after a while. It'll be worth it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 December 2010): Because first love means a lot. And love should stick. Love is forever. First love shouldn't be called that at all. Just "love".
If he loves you back, then stay with him. If he could not care less and can just move on, then you deserve someone who feels for you what you do for them.
(If men and women Love the same, that is. Love is love and lasts, period, but I often think the feeling is different... sorry to sound against- the- contemp.- grain... but it seems to me that men own and women are owned (sorry to use that word, but another would be less catchy)... friendship and passion are equal, but fatherly love is different from motherly, making relationships different... Also everyone is very individual and different... so how they define their feeling of Love will vary. Thoughts and analyses vary.)
You didn't ask for that 'bout of theoryorwhathaveyou, but there you are,
Tante Victoire
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