Does sex with a girl (if you're a girl) count as losing your virginity?
Q. When you ask people what losing your virginity means they usually say intercourse.. so what does this mean for lesbians? Like do lesbians not lose their virginity? And does it mean bisexuals lose it twice?...
A. 11 July 2011: Giving your virginity is this: When you have an entirely consentual encounter with any other person, and during that encounter your genitals are manipulated for the purpose of sexual pleasure.
So this means if you are a girl and another girl pla... (read in full...)
Obsessing over my ex math teacher
Q. Im 14 years old and im a lesbian and im in love with my ex maths teacher. ever since i saw her i new i loved her but its getting to the point were its affecting me as a person. Im becoming ver obsessed by checking her facebook account to see if she ...
A. 11 July 2011: One of the previous posters is right. Obsession is never good for a relationship, not good for any individual person. You say you know everything about her, but list all superficial things. To truly know a person is to know things like, what's ... (read in full...)
I dumped her before but I like her more now, how do I mend things??
Q. I´m going to be a sohpmore girl in high school. In eigth grade I breifly dated a seventh grader. I was severly depressed at the time and struggling with my orientation. We ended up dating for only two days befre I cut it off. She says she holds no ...
A. 10 July 2011: That's a tough one. I've been there, at a private (christian) school, in love with another girl, and all. My advice is, if it is a christian school, don't openly date. In fact, don't date at all. Just be really good friends. Most all of the ... (read in full...)
I'm engaged but I am wondering if this girl likes me. Does that suggest I might be gay?
Q. I need advice on whether or not this girl likes me. I work opposite her, so see her regularly across the road and such. I go see her a lot of the time but she's seems distant? I'm 26 and engaged to my boyfriend but I seem to find myself going to s...
A. 6 July 2011: OK, here's the thing: DO NOT get married unless you have settled your sexuality; DO NOT get married to someone if you fancy someone more than your spouse.
Do yourself, your fiance and potential future children a favor, sort these things out befo... (read in full...)
Is it illegal to have gay sex at 16?
Q. Ok, i'm a lesbian and recently i started going out with my best friend, we made out once and we've been on several dates now for about 2 months, but now she wants to take it further, i agreed to do it at hers next weekend, but i was sort of drunk ...
A. 2 July 2011: It's legal in UK at 16. The real issue, regardless of the law is, are you ready? From what you said, she seems to be pressuring you into doing something you don't seem quite ready in your own mind to do yet. Whether you are a virgin or not, if ... (read in full...)
She doesn't believe that she's beauiful! Should I ask her out?
Q. hi i'm 16 and i am a lesbian, and i am friends with a girl who is also a lesbian (she told me) She is beautiful but doesn't belive me when i tell her, slim, athletic, smart funny and really nice, And she just got dumped by her ex, and she is really ...
A. 1 July 2011: Try saying something like: "Of course you're beautiful. I would love to go out with someone as beautiful as you. If we were dating, I could say that I have the most beautiful girlfriend...and I wouldn't be telling a lie."... (read in full...)
He is bisexual and chose a heterosexual life with me but is missing out and even brought up the subjects of threesomes.
Q. We've been together for 11 years and have a beautiful daughter together we both adore and cherish. He's a Bisexual man who has chosen a heterosexual life with me. But I fear he is missing his bi lifestyle. recently he's brought up the subjects of ...
A. 22 June 2011: Rule #1 of all relationships: Do not have a relationship with any man or woman who has sex with who has sex with any person other than you--this includes them wanting to have threesomes. If he wants to have sex with someone other than you, that is ... (read in full...)
I just can't do oral on her
Q. Howdy... So I'm in a long distance relationship with another woman and I have been for quite a while. I love when she uses her tongue and her mouth on me, and so I'd like nothing better but to reciprocate, yet... I cannot. We have tried about ...
A. 17 June 2011: Believe it or not, diet has a major effect on taste/smell. Have her eat a lot of fresh, non citrus, fruit, such as mango, apple, pears, and avoid highly acidic foods with vinegar or lots of citric acids, no sodas like coke, as they have, well ... (read in full...)
Help, am I gay?
Q. im 14 and i have a boyfriend but im sure that im a lesbian. what should i do im sure a lesbian and i think i like a girl at my school do u think im gay and what should i do??...
A. 9 June 2011: Why are you sure you're a lesbian? People don't wake up one morning and suddenly realize, "Woa! I'm a lesbian now." You're not a lesbian until you've come to that conclusion after much inner-discussion and soul searching. I'm not saying you a... (read in full...)
Why is she trying to break us up? We don't even know her. Help!
Q. I've just started dating a girl and a complete stranger to both of us has just started emailing my girlfriend telling her I'm a fake and that I'm not genuine, I'm really confused because I've never spoken to this person before and neither has my ...
A. 9 June 2011: Again, don't be afraid to have the police investigate. They have the power to get phone, internet records, and can find out the true identity of this person. Once her identity is revealed, don't confront her in person. If she is in school, take ... (read in full...)
Why is she trying to break us up? We don't even know her. Help!
Q. I've just started dating a girl and a complete stranger to both of us has just started emailing my girlfriend telling her I'm a fake and that I'm not genuine, I'm really confused because I've never spoken to this person before and neither has my ...
A. 8 June 2011: If you're in school, and she happens to be going to the same school, then if you talk about this to your administrator you can have the other person disciplined, possibly removed from the school. This is called cyberbullying, and you do NOT have to ... (read in full...)
I don't want my friend to think I am a pervert, what should I do?
Q. I have been having this strong urge to make love to my female friend. We had sex once before, but that was a drunken night... Now, every time she is around me, I become so sexually aroused to the point of my having to avoid her. She is one of my ...
A. 6 May 2011: If you've had sex with someone, drunk or not, you've had sex with that someone. If a person is straight, and I mean straight, not bi-curious, then they would not have sex with you. So, by having sex with you, she obviously had something insider ... (read in full...)
Should I continue to date this guy even though his bisexuality turns me off?
Q. Hi, i have a boyfriend and he is bi sexual and i really don't like dating bi sexual guys. But I really do like him. Should I continue to date him??...
A. 22 April 2011: Dating Rule # 1: Don't date someone who has sex with someone other than you.... (read in full...)
My 'straight' friend fingers me in her sleep
Q. Okay well, I think my 'straight' friend is a lesbian. I'm absolutely okay with homosexuality as I have many bi/lesbian friends. But this is different. I don't want to confront her or anything as it's kind of a touchy topic, I can't really go up to ...
A. 14 April 2011: What you really need to do is tell her, gently, not in an antagonistic way, that what she's doing is wrong. It doesn't matter if you like it or not, what she did to you IS sexual assault. If you were on a date with a guy and he suddenly started ... (read in full...)
I don't know if I should have sex with him, I don't want him to disappear!
Q. Hello! I'm 20 years old, right now i'm dating a guy that i've been crazy about him for a year. We've been seeing each other for like one month, and thing's are getting a little bit crazy. He is 28 year's old, I had sex with one person, one time, and ...
A. 12 April 2011: Don't ever have sex with somone to get them to do anything, especially to get them to stay. Never do that, never, never, never! It will only go badly for you.... (read in full...)
I'm really interested in her and can't tell if she is in me. I just sent 101 roses. Now what?
Q. I'm really interested in this girl. Like, really interested. We both work in the same neighborhood, in bars. I manage a big nightclub and she works the graveyard shift in the café across the road from me. Anyway, for the last about three week...
A. 8 April 2011: That's an awful lot of money to spend on being anonymous. LOL I'm not saying you're wrong in sending roses, but, goodness, you're spending a lot of money on something that could very well backfire.... (read in full...)
I'm really interested in her and can't tell if she is in me. I just sent 101 roses. Now what?
Q. I'm really interested in this girl. Like, really interested. We both work in the same neighborhood, in bars. I manage a big nightclub and she works the graveyard shift in the café across the road from me. Anyway, for the last about three week...
A. 8 April 2011: 101 roses? Holy crap! Isn't that a bit overkill? Did you stop to think that she might be put off by all the attention and think it might be a bit creepy? I mean, a dozen roses, that's romantic, but 101 roses, that's like something from a movie. ... (read in full...)
About to be married, but still have strong feelings for a girl I was once crazy about.
Q. I am in love with this girl. 11 yrs ago I left our school because our love life was disturbing my education. Yet since then i have not found love in any other be it man or woman. the worst of it all is that i am preparing for my marriage this month ...
A. 7 April 2011: If you are going to be married and yet are having ANY doubt about your sexual interest in any other person, be it male or female, then you are NOT ready for marriage.... (read in full...)
She said "DO U WANNA"? Is she asking me out or does she just want to have sex with me?
Q. Okay so my girl best friend and I are really great friends. Last 5 months, She told me that she's Bi and I told her that I'm bi too. So today, Things got kinda awkward.. We were chatting online and she kept telling me this question like DO U WANN...
A. 3 April 2011: Like trance says, from what info you provided, it does sound like a sexual come-on. But, without knowing the full context of the conversation I can't tell for sure, or even close to sure.... (read in full...)
I've had a lesbian relationship before and now find I am in love with my son's teacher.
Q. I've been head over heel in love with my son's teacher for nearly 18 months. I've been in a lesbian relationship once a long time ago and now I know that she is the right one and all I want. Cheesy but true. I wish I knew what to do!!! Let her know ...
A. 2 April 2011: If you're still trying to get her to "look your way" after these warnings, perhaps this warning will be the most powerful: if you don't want your son and any other children you have to go through SERIOUS depression issues, if you don't want your son ... (read in full...)
My bi-sexual wife has made friends with a lesbian. should I be worried?
Q. should i allow my wife to be friends with someone she's attracted to? my wife is bi and the person she's attracted to is a gay girl. i just found out about. shes been hiding it from me by deleteting her text messages. when i confronted her about it...
A. 1 April 2011: As I've commented before, as someone who's been there, done that with a married woman being involved in an affair with another woman (as the other woman), if she's hiding things about her relationship, this kind of thing usually goes badly for ... (read in full...)
I've had a lesbian relationship before and now find I am in love with my son's teacher.
Q. I've been head over heel in love with my son's teacher for nearly 18 months. I've been in a lesbian relationship once a long time ago and now I know that she is the right one and all I want. Cheesy but true. I wish I knew what to do!!! Let her know ...
A. 1 April 2011: eyeswideopen is 100% right. I've been there, done that with a married woman involved with another woman (as the other woman). It's best to get things completely sorted out with him before you get involved with another woman. If you don't, trust ... (read in full...)
Would this be called cheating the new Gf? If I just asked my ex to strip while we were on webcam.
Q. Is it cheating if? Let's say you have a girlfriend. And you know your ex still loves you and you still have feelings for her, but you don't want to be in a relationship with her, but you drunk call her telling her you love her, and miss her, et...
A. 25 March 2011: "I guess, I don't know what i wanna do at this point." You're not going to like my advice but here it is: grow up. At 26-29 you should be mature enough by now to not do those kinds of things. You're above college age but you're acting li... (read in full...)
Was my teacher genuine or will he forget me while I wait? He told me to cool until I'm no longer a student
Q. Okay, so I've been crushing on this teacher for a couple of years now, and we've gotten pretty close lately but he's been scolded and he told me we should cool things off for a while because he says he doesn't want to get me in trouble. He said he ...
A. 25 March 2011: If you're going to be leaving the area (re: your "I'm going to have to say goodbye soon..." comment) within a short period, I suggest you just cut him off, politely but completely. If there's no chance of a long-term committment, then that could be ... (read in full...)
Was my teacher genuine or will he forget me while I wait? He told me to cool until I'm no longer a student
Q. Okay, so I've been crushing on this teacher for a couple of years now, and we've gotten pretty close lately but he's been scolded and he told me we should cool things off for a while because he says he doesn't want to get me in trouble. He said he ...
A. 22 March 2011: "he says he doesn't want to get me in trouble." He might say he doesn't want you to get into trouble, but really it's HIM he doesn't want to get into trouble. I'm not trying to make you feel bad, but it's a truth that when an adult tries to s... (read in full...)
I like porn and get turned on by women. Am I bisexual?
Q. Hey, well im sort of touching a senstive matter and i could perhaps use abit of advice. Im 14 years old and well im a girl and i like to watch porn. i watch metro sex porn, the thing that i dont really understa...
A. 22 March 2011: Honeypie has a very good point. Unless you've had multiple sex partners, watching porn is a bad, very bad way to try to understand what sex is like. It's acting and the things they do is not what 99.999% of the population really does during sex.... (read in full...)
Would this be called cheating the new Gf? If I just asked my ex to strip while we were on webcam.
Q. Is it cheating if? Let's say you have a girlfriend. And you know your ex still loves you and you still have feelings for her, but you don't want to be in a relationship with her, but you drunk call her telling her you love her, and miss her, et...
A. 22 March 2011: It's called having an "online affair," and it's what people go to jail for, when they do it with cops pretending to be underaged girls/boys. It doesn't mean you can't be entirely faithful to your new girlfriend in the future, but if you have any ... (read in full...)
I want my mistress to go away. I'm NOT leaving my husband!
Q. Hi Aunts, I'm in a quandary. I'm married and I've been having an affair with a female coworker for the past 3.5 years. I promised her that I'd leave my husband for her this June after my youngest child graduates from high school. How do I gently let ...
A. 24 February 2011: Blonde30s is 100% right when they say "I dont see how you can be (in love with your husband) if you have cheat on him." If you were in love you'd never have cheated. Love is forsaking all others. Sorry, my advice is, tell your husband, break it ... (read in full...)
How do I meet someone?
Q. Dear Cupid..... hi, i'm 16, i'm lesbian and i need a girlfriend! How do i meet someone??? i've crushed over loads of girls now, older and younger and i'm feeling really really horny a lot of the time. I touch myself a lot, but i want more now, do ...
A. 24 February 2011: "i need a girlfriend"
Actually, you need to find yourself, establish your path, and once you've begun the journey, you'll find the right companion. Rushing into a relationship before you're ready, before you have become the person you want to ... (read in full...)
Does my college lecturer have feelings for me?
Q. I know you’re all going to think I’m being childish here, but please hear me out. I’m 18, and very mature for my age. Last year, I met my college lecturer, and we hit it off straight away. There was one point though where I got close to this boy and ...
A. 16 February 2011: Like I said, it sounds like he's trying to hit on you, but if he really has been treating you negatively because of jealousy when you're NOT in a relationship with him, he's very likely going to be abusive to you if you are in a relationship with ... (read in full...)
I'm getting feelings again for my ex but she has a boyfriend now!
Q. Ok, right. I'm 17 and I'm a lesbian, I have known since I was little and I've no doubts about my sexuality whatsoever. Anyway, I found my ex girlfriend on a website a couple of weeks ago and we started talking again. I met up with her and her ...
A. 14 February 2011: Why in the heck did you play truth or dare? The only reason she would have played it with you is if she wanted to do something naughty; meaning she's intending on not being faithful to her current BF. Clue, clue, clue!
Like Alexxmo said, if... (read in full...)
If I leave, I will bring shame to my family, and they will break all ties with me! What should I do?
Q. Hello everyone, I am a 24-year old girl from Bordeaux. My family comes from Pakistan and we are quite a traditional family with close family ties. They do not allow me to meet my friends and my only occupation is staying at home and doing my house...
A. 14 February 2011: A male reader, anonymous, writes "You will be stuck in this horrid 1950's view on what a womans role is."
1950s? Are you kidding? Try 1350s. It's a sad thing that at one time muslim culture was more liberal/tolerant and just than pretty m... (read in full...)
Bisexual, in a relationship but want to experiment more...
Q. Ok so I'm bisexual and I've known since I was young, around 12/13. I watch lesbian porn but to me that does not determine my sexuality or anybody else's for that matter. but what I do want to do is experiment more with other girls but I'm already in ...
A. 13 February 2011: Oops, I forgot to mention earlier that one thing I admire is that you do not seem to have a problem staying committed to someone, and I like that you aren't wanting to cheat, at least in a way that would hurt the partner. When you are at a point ... (read in full...)
Bisexual, in a relationship but want to experiment more...
Q. Ok so I'm bisexual and I've known since I was young, around 12/13. I watch lesbian porn but to me that does not determine my sexuality or anybody else's for that matter. but what I do want to do is experiment more with other girls but I'm already in ...
A. 13 February 2011: Good, I hope you understand that we aren't trying to argue with you about anything, we're trying to give you advice/warning that things very well could go wrong. I've been the other girl in one of these relationships with a bi woman, and it went ... (read in full...)
Bisexual, in a relationship but want to experiment more...
Q. Ok so I'm bisexual and I've known since I was young, around 12/13. I watch lesbian porn but to me that does not determine my sexuality or anybody else's for that matter. but what I do want to do is experiment more with other girls but I'm already in ...
A. 13 February 2011: You're a A female age 16-17, and you write "i've been in 2 committed relationships that have worked fine and for a long period of time." A committed, long-term relationship is for life, not for a long period of time, especially if it's only for a ... (read in full...)
If I leave, I will bring shame to my family, and they will break all ties with me! What should I do?
Q. Hello everyone, I am a 24-year old girl from Bordeaux. My family comes from Pakistan and we are quite a traditional family with close family ties. They do not allow me to meet my friends and my only occupation is staying at home and doing my house...
A. 12 February 2011: aunt honesty is really right in that the only person who can answer the question of if you should leave is you. I cannot tell you that if you leave everything will work out and you'll find the greatest happiness of all. I cannot tell you that if ... (read in full...)
Bisexual, in a relationship but want to experiment more...
Q. Ok so I'm bisexual and I've known since I was young, around 12/13. I watch lesbian porn but to me that does not determine my sexuality or anybody else's for that matter. but what I do want to do is experiment more with other girls but I'm already in ...
A. 12 February 2011: If you're in a committed relationship with someone, you don't explore feelings for other people. Love isn't about denying who you really are. It's about finding happiness in the partner's happiness, not at all costs, but if you love someone, you ... (read in full...)
Does my college lecturer have feelings for me?
Q. I know you’re all going to think I’m being childish here, but please hear me out. I’m 18, and very mature for my age. Last year, I met my college lecturer, and we hit it off straight away. There was one point though where I got close to this boy and ...
A. 12 February 2011: The fact that he's treating you badly when he's not in direct control of your life (if there's someone else you're seeing, and such) should be a warning to you that if you have a relationship with this man, your lecturer, he will be controlling, and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend can watch my one night stand but I don't want him to join in!
Q. I'm bi-sexual and have been with my boyfriend for seven months. I've had past relationships both physical and emotional with other women and I desperately want to have another physical one night stand with a woman. Now, my boyfriend is the...
A. 1 February 2011: I don't know why people think that having sex with a person of the same sex isn't "technically cheating." If you have an affair, yes that's what it is, even if he condones it, and you're concerned that he'll want to join it, then maybe it's time ... (read in full...)
My lesbian friend suggested we have sex before I can be her gf. Is this how it operates?
Q. I'm a virgin and a lesbian. There's this girl who goes to the same college as me and she's also a lesbian. We met in our history lecture and have become tight. She's been out for 6 years and has had lots of girlfriends. She keeps telling me that...
A. 30 January 2011: How old is this girl? It sounds like she's trying to be a sex predator. Get away from her.... (read in full...)
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