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... Send *harmmyKitty a private message | | | *harmmyKitty's profile:I'm an athropological enthusiast, so hearing and trying to help with other peoples problems is a bit of a passion for me. I consider myself level-headed and intelligent, so I think I'm able to give good advice. (but then again, who doesn't?)
However, when it comes to my own problems, I can never help myself! So this is the perfect place for me.
I've only just discovered this site, but it really seems like a great place to reach out to others.
My goal is to help at least one person, even in the smallest of ways. ^-^
I live in Orlando Florida, and I'm single single single.
Some of my other passions include reading, writing, videogames, learning new languages, traveling to other countries and meeting new people! But that's just to name a few. |
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Do I get out?
Q. Do I get out? I am a 30 yr old female. With husband for 10 years and married for 4.5 with no children. I am very unhappy with my relationship and with my husband. I have been unhappy for years. And I hate to admit it but I was unhappy before w...
A. 18 September 2009: It doesn't seem like this is a very hard decision at all. You've clearly realized you're not happy, and haven't been for a long time. Should you have married him in the first place? Probably not, but you can't get that time back, so don't lose any ... (read in full...)
What does 'Enjoy your company' mean?
Q. For starters I am 42 years old and have been divorced for 4 years now I did not start dating until Feb of this year - About a month ago I met a women who is 48 - We get along great - and we compliment one another on a wide variety of different ...
A. 9 October 2008: If you feel like she's being vague, then I'd just ask her directly. Taking things slow is fine and dandy, but you deserve to know if your actually going anywhere. Tell her you're developing feelings for her, and just want to see if shes feeling the ... (read in full...)
I need direction. Something. Please.
Q. This is long, but I really need the help. Thanks. Um, well I'm 16 years old, and I'm a junior this year. I come from a very very very Christian family, who does not under any circumstances accept sex before you get married. I believe in God, and...
A. 9 October 2008: I think your making things out to be way more complicated than they really are. You clearly seem to like this "A" fellow more than the other, so what more is there to think about?
You don't owe him anything just because you lost your virginity to h... (read in full...)
When did you first have a boyfriend/girlfriend - that actually lasted a few months?
Q. Poll: When was the first time you had a relationship, and what age did you have your first kiss? I'm not talking about a peck on the cheek or peck on the lips type of kiss, I mean a toungue kiss? And when did you first have a boyfrien...
A. 3 September 2008: I was 17 when I had my first boyfriend as well as first kiss, and that relationship lasted over a year. ... (read in full...)
How do I get over my heartbreak if he's right there?
Q. In the past couple couple weeks I have been going through a painful rollercoaster of emotions. My boyfriend, who I sincerely love, went to visit an online friend for a week and broke up with me after returning, preferring to be with her. He said ...
A. 3 September 2008: I wouldn't hold on to any kind of hope. Honestly, even if for some reason he said he wanted to get back together, could you really ever put your trust in him again? You'd spend everyday wondering if it's going to happen again. I think his action... (read in full...)
Should my girlfriend pay more than her equal share when we go out to dinner?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for little under a year. We both make decent money. She enjoys eating out at finer places more so than I do and I pay for a majority of these meals. Since I'm mainly going out to these finer establishments for her, ...
A. 31 August 2008: In this day and age, I hardly think it's unreasonable for a woman to pick up the tab once in a while, especially if she's the one that wants to go out all the time.
I think I'd start by letting her know you'd like to stop spending so much money go... (read in full...)
I am not attracted to my husband anymore, we fight all the time, and I keep thinking about this other man.
Q. I need some help with my marriage.. Here's the deal we have 3 kids been married for 7 years and together for 13 years. Things have gradually been getting bad. We barely can open our mouths with out fighting, we are at each others throats all the ...
A. 8 August 2008: Even though you're feeling so strongly repelled by your husband, there was obviously something there for you to feel like you wanted to marry him, and have children with him in the first place. And that seems like it should be worth at least an ... (read in full...)
I really want to feel chemistry again but it's not happened since I was in high school
Q. okay. here it goes. i'm an eighteen-year-old female. when i was a freshman in high school, i developed this horrible, unreciprocated crush on this older guy, a bass player i knew. it was one of those butterflies-in-the-stomach, obsessively-chec...
A. 8 August 2008: I think you're spot on. Sometimes we really just want the thrill of the chase. Like those stuffed animal catcher machines... you pump in cash trying to get a certain toy when you could just as easily go to the store and buy something similar for a ... (read in full...)
I am trying to forget this idiot and move on. Not knowing what happened is making moving on really hard and I can’t stop analyzing everything!
Q. Sorry for the length but it's all relevant. A year ago this guy asked me out but I was unavailable so I said no. He kept asking why and after so many messages asking why not I just ignored him. Six months later i decided to contact him, just say...
A. 7 August 2008: He's definitely jerking you around. Texting doesn't take that much effort, no matter what you have going on, and I think those huge gaps in communication are a clear indicator that he's not that into you. Looks like things were rocky in his rel... (read in full...)
I'm heartbroken. I want to confront him about what I discovered, but I don't want him to know how I found out. Please help.
Q. i have been with my boyfriend for only like a month. i have fallen pretty hard for him. everything about him is perfect to me...and everything always seems to fall into place. the other day he lost his cell phone and i found it today at my house. I...
A. 1 August 2008: I agree with the other aunts here about the photos. I wouldn't be too worried. I'm sure I have a few photos on my phone of things I wouldn't really want my boyfriend to see, just because I never go through them. You've only been together a month, ... (read in full...)
I feel she's changed, and now it's making me feel very insecure. What should I do?
Q. I've been seeing my girlfriend for about 6 months now. Since she got back from holiday she has been different. We were very much in love. Telling each other every day how we felt. Since she has been back we have been different. She doesn't tell me h...
A. 1 August 2008: It seems like your in that point of your realtionship where you get past the exciting, lovey-dovey stage. (Or at least she has). And she might be re-evaluating things. Doesn't mean she wants to break up, she just might need you to tone it down a ... (read in full...)
Does it hurt to have sex the first time?
Q. I know you must get many of these questions, however, did it hurt the first time you had sex? How long will this go on for?...
A. 12 June 2008: To be honest it hurt ALOT. When me and my boyfriend decided we were ready, it still took 4 or 5 seperate occasions before it actually happened, because each time it would hurt so bad that I had to stop. After the first time, it still took at least ... (read in full...)
Should I feel insecure for my boyfriend going to meet an ex?
Q. Would you feel insecure if your boyfriend went out to meet his ex girlfriend of 6 years with plausable reason? he says he had the intention of you going with him....he is still friends with her and all of his friends are her friends....what advice ...
A. 10 June 2008: Honestly, I would also feel uncomfortable and insecure, even if he had a perfectly good reason. But I don't think it's necessarily founded. I think it's natural for everyone to feel a little leary about this kind of thing.
You'll just have to ... (read in full...)
I like this guy who keeps asking me for sex and I don't trust him. What do I do?
Q. thre is this guy that i met and he is 17 and i'm 15.he is really cute and i like him. we went out for 2 days and then i broke up with him cause he kept ansking me to hve sex with him and i do not feel like doing that right now and when i tell him ...
A. 10 June 2008: There's nothing to even think about here!
He's clearly told you that he's ONLY interested in sex, and ONLY with you because you're a virgin!!
You'll have to trust me that NO man who cares about you will ask you for sex (let alone your virgini... (read in full...)
Should I just go full out and ask ex how she feels about me now?
Q. Okay this is to do with my ex, we weren't together an incredibly long time, 5 months. We used to get on so well, same interests etc (music likes, tv shows, film genres), then she became confused about what she wanted. I was kinda expecting it by the ...
A. 10 June 2008: Actions like this are never really easy to read.
As far as the texting goes, I think I would have said the same thing to her. SHE was the one who said she wanted space after all. You can't really make the transition from dating to 'just friends'... (read in full...)
Not sure why we broke up but he wants to be friends. Should I stay in contact?
Q. Hello everyone, I'm feeling very confused right now. My boyfriend of nine months broke it off a little over a week ago. I knew he'd been having a few doubts after attending some of his friends' weddings, but we had decided to talk things over and ...
A. 9 June 2008: I guess it's up to you if you really want to meet up "one last time." I think you probably know, deep down, what's going to happen. It's possible that this could give you some kind of closure, or it's possible that you'll just end up repeating the ... (read in full...)
Not sure why we broke up but he wants to be friends. Should I stay in contact?
Q. Hello everyone, I'm feeling very confused right now. My boyfriend of nine months broke it off a little over a week ago. I knew he'd been having a few doubts after attending some of his friends' weddings, but we had decided to talk things over and ...
A. 9 June 2008: I know that you probably don't want to hear this, but I honestly think you ought to cut contact. I've been through the same thing so I do understand how you're feeling now. But you can always see the "Big Picture" more clearly when you look at it ... (read in full...)
Should I trust him even though he has admitted he cheated on his ex while with the same group of mates that he might be meeting up with tonight?
Q. Hey everyone, I don't know what to do. I have a problem. I love my boyfriend very much and he says he loves me and wants to marry me. We have been together for six months but he has admitted that he cheated on his ex with a girl that he is meeting ...
A. 1 April 2008: Trust isn't conditional. If he's really that worried then its his own responsibilty to either not go, or not drink. You can't really be telling him what he can or can't do, it's up to him. Whatever the outcome, it'll show you how dedicated he ... (read in full...)
I was so mean to my ex should I apologise or just let it go?
Q. My ex and I broke up in august and he pretty much hates me. i messed up, i lied to him about something big and continued lying even when he found me out. Obviously he was devastated and furious and i really hurt him. he cut all ties with me and...
A. 29 March 2008: If you really do care about him, maybe you ought to leave him in peace. If you contact him to apologize, you'll just be opening old wounds that probably took a long time to heal for him. It might make you feel better, but I'm sure it would just ... (read in full...)
Mommy's 'Baby Girl'...how do I handle this?
Q. My 5 year old blew me away recently. She said her private area was tickling her. I let her know it is important that she can talk to me about things. I did express my concern that this should be private to her. I've noticed stuff that I don't want ...
A. 28 March 2008: I'm unsure of exactly what your asking, so maybe I'm thinking in the wrong direction here, but it's natural for children that age to 'explore' themselves. You've done right by telling her that she can confide in you, also that such things are ... (read in full...)
I am not over him and think about him 24/7...
Q. Last year I got really hooked on this radio station, it was a right wee hobby of mine! I became famous in its own wee world with the djs and the listenors who all called in and it was alot of fun. At the time I got very close to one of the djs. At ...
A. 28 March 2008: Even if you both truly deeply love each other, he's made it clear that he won't leave his wife, so whats the point in torturing yourself? You've done the right thing by cutting contact with him. You can't possibly 'get over' him if you keep in t... (read in full...)
How can I prevent her getting hurt again?
Q. hi everyone, just recently one of my best friends found a boyfriend. She had been in a relationship a few months ago and the guy didnt treat her with any respect. I comforted her after this and became very emotionally attached to the girl. I ...
A. 28 March 2008: She has to live and learn, so you really can't prevent her from getting hurt. All you can do is be there for her again if you want to be a good friend. But like LazyGuy said, if you treat her like just a friend would, that's all she's going to see ... (read in full...)
Can a partner taking dancing lessons without you affect your relationship?
Q. Can a partner taking dancing lessons without you that requires a partner affect your relationship?...
A. 28 March 2008: I seriously doubt it... but why not take dancing class with that partner? ... (read in full...)
Should I ask her to let me watch porn to get me aroused when we have sex?
Q. Been in a relationship with a girl for 5 years now... she's my second long-term girlfriend. Before I met her I was into porn, and lad mags, and generally just liked looking at women all the time. After I ended my relationship with my first long term ...
A. 28 March 2008: Well for starters, even though this will be a touchy subject for a girl, you ought to express to her your concerns. Communication is essential to any relationship, and by the sounds of it, you really want things to work out.
You might want to ... (read in full...)
Why does he still contact me?
Q. Ok...ex bf dumped after 2+yrs together saying he wanted space and wasn't sure whether he loved me as gf or a friend. Gave him space then few weeks ago said he doesn't want to be with me anymore and wants to be friends with me. I never bothered to ...
A. 28 March 2008: Even though he's told you that he's not in love with you anymore, I'm sure that you still mean a lot to him as a person. Feelings change, but you've given eachother a lot and two years is a long time...
It'd be great if you guys could stay fri... (read in full...)
I found him in bed with another girl..we split, now he wants to get back together..Should I forgive and forget ?
Q. I've been really impressed with this site so far, so I'm hoping that maybe someone out there can give me some advice, or share a similar story... I met my last boyfriend about 8 months ago, and we clicked immediately. We had text book compatabili...
A. 28 March 2008: Thanks to everyone for their advice. It really helped to have some objective opinions on the situation. I decided to cut ties with him, and haven't seen or spoken with him for a while now. I'm still pretty sore over it all, but things are ... (read in full...)
My first boyfriend ever and I love him so much. He's going away with the army for six months, how will I cope?
Q. Hi There I have asked questions here before which has been a lot of help to me. Now im about to face the biggest challange of my life and need as much help as possible to do it Im 24 And i am in a reletionship This is my first relationship. I ...
A. 27 March 2008: You should start by thinking about how lucky you are to have someone that you feel so strongly about! The fact that you've found your true love is a real blessing, and that's all you need to get you through this. Of course it will be hard that he ... (read in full...)
Need your opinion...I'm feeling unsure about our relationship.
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for almost 9 months and I love him to death but I feel very unsure about our relationship. I have been very insacure since I've met him. I have had alot going on in my life and have told him I need the support from him ...
A. 27 March 2008: I know exactly what you mean. I was in a relationship with a guy like that for over a year. It was nice at first, but after a while I felt constantly anxious because he wouldn't treat me like he cared. And the sadest thing is that I couldn't even ... (read in full...)
Why would my 15 year old have open diapers inside her closet? I have not mentioned my discovery yet.
Q. Well, I was cleaning through my daughters room as usual while she was at school and I go through her closet to clean it up and all and I find a bag of diapers (open) inside her closet. I wasn't really sure what to think at the moment besides that I ...
A. 27 February 2008: There's really no obvious answer here. But I think we can both agree that this is not normal for any 15 year old. I would recommend talking to your daughter about why she feels like she needs these. It could be something medical that she's too... (read in full...)
Does he like me? what do I do?please help!
Q. Okay, I know there's so many questions about this but I really need help with my situation. I started to like this teacher at my school when i was 13, and now i'm 16 and leaving the school i've realised I do love him. Don't tell me it's a crush or ...
A. 27 February 2008: I know this is the last thing you want to hear, but how can you be so sure it's love?
When I was 16, I thought I knew too, but my perseptions have totally changed. I'm 21, and I'm still finding out that I really don't know as much as I thought abou... (read in full...)
Why does my husband treat his family this way?
Q. I need some level headed opinions Please. My hubby and I have always had lots of disagreements and rows over our 20 year marriage. I always felt that I could do no right and if he disagreed with me over something it wasn’t talked about but massive ...
A. 27 February 2008: I think you know what you need to do here.
There's really nothing that makes this behavior acceptable.
From what you've written, it seems like this guy is just sort of 'the only thing you've ever known' deal, and that's why your compelled t... (read in full...)
My wife has a low sex drive, I can live with it but would really like if she gave me blowjobs, any ideas to convince her?
Q. I have a sad and serious problem. I have been married to a fantastic woman whom I love very much for almost 5 years. But our sex life is not satisfying for me. She has a very low sex drive and basically only likes the missionary position and ...
A. 27 February 2008: I wonder if maybe there is some other underlying problems with your wifes overall view on sex?
You didn't provide much detail on the matter, so I'm being presumptuous, but perhaps she's looking at sex the wrong way all together. Some people grow... (read in full...)
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