In love with my late husband's brother - is it wrong?
Q. Hi! This is going to be long, so please be patient! I'm a widow. My husband died suddenly four years ago leaving me with three children, then aged six, three and one. I was devastated and it took me a long time to come to terms with his death. H...
A. 8 October 2013: It's 100% ok. Feel free to go ahead.... (read in full...)
Thoughts on writing to your ex?
Q. Is it a good idea to write a letter to your ex? I've been doing the no contact rule, but it has been really hard. I've been thinking about writing a letter to let her know how I feel and how much I am hurting. Will I be making a fool of myself by ...
A. 8 October 2013: Go out and date more. No point picking at old scars, you'll just bleed and hurt and all for what?
... (read in full...)
Should I try to start something with a crush that works at my school?
Q. I'm 17 and in year 13 at school, I've had a crush on a member of staff that works at the school, however he's not my teacher, he just works in the school as a social helper, he's about 22 I think and we do talk quite a lot. I'm not sure on what to ...
A. 8 October 2013: Take down his email and phone number and call him when you're no longer a student of that school. Simples.... (read in full...)
How to give a married man the brush off without causing offence?
Q. To keep it brief, a married man who works in the same field as me has been flirting and inappropriate since an event a few months ago. I have no intention of doing anything untoward and keep steering things back to a professorial level in our ...
A. 8 October 2013: Better be prepared to cause offence unless you're ready to be really uncomfortable for a reeally long time. You will not be guilty of anything and he will keep his distance. He's a dog and is trying to take advantage of your quiet nature to do ... (read in full...)
The man I loved made a complete volte-face after marriage and my life is hell with him. What do I do?
Q. I kindly need your opinion regarding my marriage situation.I have been married for 5 years with the man I loved with all my heart.We've been together for 11 years prior to marriage(since high school).We couldn't marry and live together because of ...
A. 1 October 2011: Just tell him to respect you and address you as an adult, no yelling. You seem to be under greater stress than he is. Let him know that. Is he flexing muscles because his mum or some stupid friends have told him to rule over you because he is a man ... (read in full...)
Something changed since I lost my virginity
Q. I lost my virginity back in january and my discharge has never been the same. it's extremely thick and basically a solid and is sort of cottagecheese-like. when I clean it up, it is SUPER dry and uncomfortable down there. som...
A. 14 June 2010: Wash in there with warm water and salt until it normalises. It worked for me. I had a pH imbalance and it corrected it.... (read in full...)
Terrible Twin Trouble!
Q. Help! Me and my boyfriend have been going out for 3 years and I love him dearly, and I feel so guilty for this but he took me to his family reunion back in the carribean islands and introduced me to all his family I met his twin brother, who is the ...
A. 14 June 2010: Just hang around your guy a lot more than usual. It'll keep u safe from the big bad wolf.... (read in full...)
Is it wrong trying to court someone else's wife?
Q. Through the searching and hunting i have finally found a good chemistry and connection with someone. One problem, she has a husband. I have also met him and he's such a cool guy! I met her through a friend that both her and i are close to, met her ...
A. 14 June 2010: Leave her alone. She's taken... (read in full...)
Was he doing this to try and get my attention, does he like me?
Q. I was walking down the hall chatting to my friend and I saw him walking in my direction from the corner of my eye. I usually say hi to him, but I didn't think I was going to as I was busy chatting to my friend, so I thought he would just walk by. ...
A. 27 March 2010: He's a flirt. Don't read any meaning into what he says. And trust me, all guys are like that with 70% looking for an easy lay. They know flirting makes girls weak at the knees and I mean c'mon! You're tripping already. Just don't read any meaning ... (read in full...)
Old love still stirring....
Q. I have been married for almost 4 years...we have one child and another one on the way. We dates for a long time before we got married. Before I met him I knew another man. It was love at first sight for me. We never dated because it was never ...
A. 27 March 2010: The other guy doesn't love you. He only lusts after your body and will dump you like a rag when he gets bored (which won't take long) Your husband knows the meaning of true love. Turn all your attention to your husband, show him some respect and ... (read in full...)
Do I continue to pursue my sister in law after my wife's passing away?
Q. Have known my sister in-law for 15 years, during the time of my wife's illness and passing I and the sister in-law where together and made all the decisions together during this time. Now 4 Months after my wife's passing my sister in-law stops by ...
A. 27 March 2010: Since she's married, you'd better leave her alone. Spread your net outside the family. If you're so lovable you'll surely meet your own woman and not have to steal from another man. Good luck.... (read in full...)
I feel unloved, both by my hubby and by the guy I had an affair with
Q. I am married and started seeing a married man. A little bit of history... I knew him back when I was 16 (he was 21) and we worked together. He never lead on like he liked me, of course I would catch him looking at me. I totally was crushing on ...
A. 26 March 2010: Don't feel suicidal. Neither of them has rejected you. But you seem to have tied your appreciation of yourself to whether men want to be with you or not. I think you need to stop thinking about men for a while. Just be a little selfish and do ... (read in full...)
Being raped - can you experience it and it not then affect your relationships?
Q. *OP's own title* My girlfriend and I have been together a few months, we are both in our early 30s and things have been developing very quickly. We're seeing each other once during the week and at most weekends. A few weeks ago, I disclosed t...
A. 26 March 2010: If it's not an issue for her then it shouldn't be an issue for you. Go ahead and stop nitpicking.... (read in full...)
Should I tell my wife to stop mailing the guy who has a crush on her?
Q. Hi everybody, My wife of 6 years went on vacation with her aunt for a week recently. Apparently she met another guy (I don't think anything happened between them, at least that's what she told me) but that guy had, and still has, a crush on her. He ...
A. 26 March 2010: Ask her to stop, I'd be seriously upset if I were you. Just ask her to block his email address, or better still, do it for her. A silly guy isn't worth shaking up a marriage over. She's not single anymore and that means there are certain kinds of ... (read in full...)
Is there anything I can do to be more attractive physically or am I just too old to be considered attractive?
Q. I would like to hear a sincere answer. Not a mean one, but a sincere one. I've been feeling very depressed about my age and my appearance lately. I feel like I'm very plain and unattractive and I want SO BADLY to be attractive and desir...
A. 22 March 2010: 1. Get rid of your baggy clothes. Wear fitted clothes, preferably pants and a blouse with a collar of any style, they make you look smart and when you look smart, you tend to feel and also act smart.
2. Change your hair, change the colour and choo... (read in full...)
I'm a pupil and I can't deal with my teachers backstabbing me...
Q. hi im a fifteen year old girl, and recently i found out that some teachers have been talking about me. im a fairly good student, a bit loud i admit, but nothing too bad. however, my friend's mum works in the school office, and the other day she over...
A. 22 March 2010: Yes, you feel bad because you feel guilty. You feel guilty because you know some of the stuff is true. So what can you do? Sit down, search yourself, identify your faults and consciously start to change for the better. If they were lying 100% you ... (read in full...)
Astrology!
Q. hello I would like to ask what do people think of astrology did anyone read some predictions of his horoscope and it really happened! please give me your experience...
A. 22 March 2010: It's rubbish. Horoscopes are very general statements that can be interpreted 200 different ways. My advice? It's not worth the trouble, you'll simply confirm your worst fears and put yourself in a ton of trouble.... (read in full...)
I'm very well spoken, and am not sure if this is a good or bad thing.
Q. Hello all. When i am talking to boys, i find my voice extremely annoying. It dosn't change, but i am quite well spoken, and im not sure whether this is a good or bad thing. would it irritate people? i would love a straightforward answer, thankyou ...
A. 22 March 2010: Everybody does it, don't get freaked out. It's normal. You subconsciously try to sound your best when talking to someone of the opposite sex. Like I said, we all do it.... (read in full...)
My best friend is getting married to my ex-girlfriend! How do I get over this?
Q. My best friend and girlfriend left me? I cheated on her several times. And thought she would never find out but after a while my bf and her started talking and they got very close he realized what a asshole I have been to her he fell in love wit...
A. 12 February 2010: Bad karma. You can't eat your cake and have it. You did not deserve wither of them because from your own description you are a very selfish and uncaring person. She's not a toe rag to hang around and take your rubbish for ever. The solution to your ... (read in full...)
Fiance won't marry me because of ex sister-in-law's behavior!
Q. My fiance of two years (we've been together a total of 7.5 years and have a two-year-old daughter together) recently told me that he never wants to get married. He proposed on New Years 2008 right when the ball dropped. That summer we had some ...
A. 18 January 2010: He sounds like a spoilt brat , while you sound as if your biological clock is your main motivation to get hitched. Sounds like a bad combination because you'll end up constantly hearing him say "Well it was you who wanted to get married" My advice? ... (read in full...)
I've had genital warts, what do I say if she says she's on the pill?
Q. i want to have sex with someone but i have had genital warts before. its advised that i should wear a condom all the time, but what if she says 'im on the pill its fine you dont have to wear one?' i dont want to tell her ive had the warts before. ...
A. 23 December 2009: Even a condom won't protect her against warts because the virus also lies dormant in the skin of the scrotum and thighs. If you actually care for her health, you'd better tell her. If you're lucky and she has also had it before, then you're in luck. ... (read in full...)
How can I get my friend back
Q. Hi My question is what should i do about this situation my best friend tried to have sex with me and i hurt her feelings and now she hates me. My best friend is a girl she ive known her for forever we just get along so well and have alot of fun...
A. 23 December 2009: You don't have to sleep with her as a favor. that's the worst reason to sleep with anyone, especially a virgin. Tell her the stuff you just said, "She's a really great person, she's pretty and can get any guy she wants but you wouldn't want to ruin ... (read in full...)
I kissed my cousin by accident what do I do
Q. I kissed my cousin i dont know why we was talking about something and we where close and i just kissed her i didnt mean it i felt like i was dreamin. I have this huge crush on her like huge but was never gonna tell. she didnt even move when ...
A. 23 December 2009: Reduce the number of occasions you have to run into her. And try to be friends with other girls. It's a crush and you'll get over it. But you have to work on it. She's family and that makes her totally off limits to you.... (read in full...)
How do I figure out which employee to cut?
Q. The company I work for needs to down size my office by one position. Since I'm the manager it's up to me to figure out which position can be eliminated and create a strategy for re-directing the work load to the other 4 workers. There are two ...
A. 18 December 2009: Cut the single mom. She's unproductive. Whatever personal issues she's got aren't your business. as for the old lady, well you'll just have to endure her presence for a tad longer.... (read in full...)
She did me wrong and I broke it off, but why isnt she begging for me to come back?
Q. So, my ex has done me wrong--undeniably. I broke it off. She cried and still wanted to be friends. I said no. She got angry. It's been 4 days. Why hasn't she called me back begging? I don't really (only kind of) want to talk to her, but it sure...
A. 18 December 2009: You're a cruel man. What do you take her for? Your slave?... (read in full...)
I just want to know what do I do to stop being so attached to him!
Q. well, i have been in a relationship for 1 and a half year. day after day seems like he doesn't want me anymore. i have to force myself on him. i beg for attention. this morning i knew he starts work early so i rung him so many times but his phone ...
A. 18 December 2009: "I need to stop putting him first and just do my own things and make myself happy." You own words. Please take your own advice. Look for stuff you can do by yourself with your free time and don't call him anymore, wait for him to call you from now ... (read in full...)
Can someone take what I've just posted and make sense of it all?
Q. Is it possible, once a women says she doesnt feel in love with you anymore, to ever feel in love with you again? the relationship was rocky for the last year, I got to comfortable, and didnt really pay much attention to her, as we rarely talked, she ...
A. 18 December 2009: you're not getting any younger. You deserve a stable and happy relationship. Let her go and move on.... (read in full...)
I'm friends with a guy at work but I feel there is more in the air, please advise.
Q. im friends with a guy at work and because hes new ive been helping him a lot with the paperwork etc so he calls me a lot. im probably being paranoid but the last two nights ive been on the phone to him for at least 2 hours. the weird thing is i fin...
A. 18 December 2009: Chill a bit. Don't go after him. If he's actually interested he'll come after you by himself.... (read in full...)
Sharing a bed with my girlfriend has become a nightmare. What should I do?
Q. Hi, I'm having some real problems in bed with my girlfriend, but not in the way you would immediately think. Sharing a bed with her has become a total nightmare, specifically when we stay at her flat. I'm usually awoken at nights when she pulls m...
A. 18 December 2009: Sounds like she's on something or else she's got anger management issues. This has serious implications for the future of your relationship. Unless of course you look forward to a happily ever after in twin beds.... (read in full...)
Is it wrong to tease my female best friend when I only like her as a friend?
Q. hello everyone, just a simple question, is it wrong to tease a female bestfriend? like hugging too much, acting romantic toward her a lot, being overly nice to her, holding her hand. i only want to be friends and only like her as a friend though...
A. 14 December 2009: Sounds like you like her more than a friend but you're trying to test the waters first without hurting yourself. My advice? Unless you're willing to actually date her, cut it out.
... (read in full...)
I'm worried I could end up marrying the wrong person! Should I accept him or let him go?
Q. I've been with my fiance a year now, he proposed to me 8mths ago, but since then he's been going off and on. for no reasons he'll start avoiding me later he'll come back and beg me. Last 2 month he came to my house i saw him off, when he got home...
A. 14 December 2009: Can you spend the rest of your life with a hot and cold person? the time to decide is now.... (read in full...)
My married neighbour kissed me, do I let it go or should we talk about us?
Q. Okay here goes, I am unhappily married and have been attracted to my friend/neighbours husband for about 6 months now. It was never anthing but harmless flirting. My husband and I would get together with him and his wife and have drinks and let our ...
A. 14 December 2009: I totally agree with everyone else on here - don't go looking for the guy, ask your husband for forgiveness and work on your marriage. The neighbour only wants to sleep with you. DO you only want no strings attached sex for the rest of your life? ... (read in full...)
Help! I want to get married and he doesn't. He says that he doesn't believe in marriage!
Q. This is the first time i've done anything like this and so here goes....... I am living with my partner in a house purchased together, who I absolutely love and adore and he feels the same, this i am confident about. We have been together fo...
A. 11 December 2009: What can I say? Most registries will not join you unless you have two witnesses anyway so I guess he really does not want to commit. That is the issue. Give him some time though(not an ultimatum) and don't let him know you're studying him for signs ... (read in full...)
How do I cope with losing my virginity to the wrong guy? Dumb dumb dumb!
Q. lost my virginity last night - still feel like a virgin. It hurt and it was completely with the wrong guy - i remember crying after nad just wanting a cuddle - he feel a sleep and i was left in the darkness thinking about what i had allowed. I was ...
A. 7 December 2009: Lest i forget absolutely DO NOT tell anyone about it as richtea advised. ... (read in full...)
How do I cope with losing my virginity to the wrong guy? Dumb dumb dumb!
Q. lost my virginity last night - still feel like a virgin. It hurt and it was completely with the wrong guy - i remember crying after nad just wanting a cuddle - he feel a sleep and i was left in the darkness thinking about what i had allowed. I was ...
A. 7 December 2009: So we've all made dumb mistakes and taken rash decisions. What is done is done. Look to the future and try not to sleep with dumb guys any more. At least you now know the value of your body. Don't give it so freely next time.... (read in full...)
Help! I want to get married and he doesn't. He says that he doesn't believe in marriage!
Q. This is the first time i've done anything like this and so here goes....... I am living with my partner in a house purchased together, who I absolutely love and adore and he feels the same, this i am confident about. We have been together fo...
A. 7 December 2009: Sounds like you love the idea of a lavish wedding more than actually being married. Unfortunately your loving fiancee is shy. My plain advice is this - take the registry option PLEASE. At least it's a start and it is also a wedding. Just see if you ... (read in full...)
How do I get her to realize that I'm the right guy who can treat her the right way?
Q. Ok so here it is... I work with this girl... I've really begun to like her... she and I tend to work one double a week... And on lunch break I take her out to eat every time... We talk on lunch break about ourself and things of that nature... But we ...
A. 7 December 2009: If it's worth losing the friendship, then be a man and ask her out. Life is a risk.... (read in full...)
He says he loves me like a sister!
Q. Sorry if this is just obvious and it sounds stupid but one of my best guy friends said to me he loves me like a sister. He's said in the past once when someone went and spread a load of lies that he loved me as a friend. But now he says he loves...
A. 7 December 2009: Oh it's a lovely thing. It means he feels very comfortable around you. Of course he may also be testing the waters to see how you'd react if he actually asked you out. Next time he says it, watch his eyes, he may just be lying.... (read in full...)
What is the average age people get their first kiss?
Q. what is the average age people get there first kiss i think theres this social status there such as "go for it perverts?age 12-13'' ''mr. popular age 12,13. ''not losers but not popular 13,14 ''losers 'nerds' 15,16. tell me if im wrong im probably ...
A. 7 December 2009: It's not when that matters, it's who you're kissing and if they're worth it. Note though, that hundreds of diseases can be caught through kissing including STDs. So think hard before you go around kissing anybody.... (read in full...)
Why won't my husband sleep with me?
Q. My sex drive seems out of control. My husband doesn't really like to have sex with me as much as I think I need. Not only that, but when I do have sex with him, I feel disappointed. He has never been able to make me orgasm. He is the only person I ...
A. 7 December 2009: Are you sure his work is not stressful - Laborious, long hours, a bullying boss? Does he get to eat dinner before you pounce on him? Just asking, cos the guy just sounds stressed out to me.... (read in full...)
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