Like what
he writes?
... Add *r.Insignificant to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *r.Insignificant a private message | | *r.Insignificant's Ratings | |
| | *r.Insignificant's profile:I am a 37 yo male. I was married for 6 1/2 years before I finally fessed up and admitted that I wasn't in love with my wife (she is an exceptional woman by the way and there is nothing bad to be said about her!).
I have been divorced for 3 1/2 years now and try to live a much simpler life. I am single by choice and not looking for a relationship, or a fling for that matter! :)
I do not have any children but have paid for the abortion of my first child. My second child died 3 years ago. Yes, I am heartbroken but I am not broken altogether.
I have been very selfish in my life but through God I am trying to live with more humility and humbleness. I am assured by God that the best days of my life are ahead of me and for that I am grateful.
I try to live my life everyday according to the following motto:
One should never put themselves in a position to take from someone else. |
|
My BF called me his ex-wifes name
Q. I have been seeing a wonderful man for 20 months now and we have had a few problems with his former spouse as they have remained very close friends. However, in the last month he has called me by her name 2 times (not in bed) just while we were out ...
A. 29 July 2009: I think these are just innocent mistakes. It sounds like he has an active relationship with her for his daughter's sake. Has he ever called you by his daughter's name?
He has three women active in his life: His daughter, you, and his ex wife.... (read in full...)
Any men willing to share their views on platonic friendship?
Q. Thanks for reading this - this is a rather open-ended question. Without going into the details of my situation, I was wondering what attitude men have towards being platonic friends with women. I have a new-ish straight male friend who is si...
A. 18 May 2009: I do not have one female friend that I am not attracted to in one way or another. Any female friends that I spend time with, I have an attraction to in some capacity. The more time I spend with them or the more intimate event, the more I am to ... (read in full...)
I am anxious about her touching me "there" because of size
Q. I have a problem... okay im in a very open relationship with my girlfriend and we really like eachothe. everythingis great and we've been going out for a few monts...but lately i've noticed she's been getting a little touchy feeely...i know she...
A. 18 May 2009: This is every guys insecurity...well every guy that is average in size; there are a lot of us! Let her touch you there and enjoy the touch. It wouldn't hurt you either to do some research on how women like to be touched.
Just always be prepared... (read in full...)
Should I tell him I cheated? What he doesn't know won't hurt him, right?
Q. I have made a huge mistake, And when I was drunk last week at a party I cheated on my boyfriend and had sex with another guy. My boyfriend doesn't know as i'm too frightened to tell him, because I know it would be over as soon as I do tell him. ...
A. 18 May 2009: Yes I think you should tell him and risk the consequences. I don't think you can say that you would never do it again because well, you have already done it once - something that you probably thought you were never capable of doing altogether.
... (read in full...)
I told him its either her or me
Q. I have been living with someone whom I love more than anything. He works on a tugboat and is gone most of the time. I recently found out that he is texting his friend's girlfriend (His friend works on the boat with him). I confronted him about his ...
A. 16 May 2009: Well it sounds like that is a deal breaker for you. I am not going to tell you that you need to trust him more or that you had every right to react the way you did. I am not going to speculate on what is going on between the two of them. For you, ... (read in full...)
Feels like hell
Q. First off, I'm a guy, and while this may seem unusual coming from a person of the male persuasion, I feel utterly lost and confused by my current predicament, so let me try and explain as best I can. Let me begin by saying I'm madly in love wi...
A. 16 May 2009: "...I'm madly in love with a wonderful woman. She brightens the horizons of otherwise cloudy days, and every moment I spend with her feels easily worth the world itself bathed in gold and platinum. My love for her barely meets expressionable ... (read in full...)
I can't stop thinking about my stalker!
Q. This man has been harassing me for years! We had a brief relationship 3 years ago, it was very intense but it ended quickly. He cheated on me with a hooker! We were sort of on a break though, and I was cheating on him too, though I don't think he ...
A. 15 May 2009: It is because you crave the attention no matter how unhealthy it is. Go see a counselor as this is not normal.... (read in full...)
Does he want out? Or is he just sulking?
Q. I really need some advice! My partner, whom I live with, had a big tantrum. He was having trouble with his internet and asked me to call up the provider about it. I used to work for the company and was having a chat with the operator as the systems ...
A. 14 May 2009: I think you are doing the right thing! Good for you!
And of course it is all your fault, it certainly couldn't be his! NOT!
Welcome to a brand new day! The sun shines on your face :)... (read in full...)
Low Libido, Can't Talk About It
Q. An interesting thing has happened in my relationship with my wife. I suppose the proper thing to do would be to ask her, but she really gets uncomfortable when talking about sex. This is not new but a condition that has increased over the years. ...
A. 14 May 2009: Has she gone through menopause yet? Menopause just wreaks havoc on a woman and God bless them for being the superior beings and having the strength to go through it. God bless you too for being on the receiving end!
I am concerned that she may ... (read in full...)
What do you think the chances of me being pregnant are?
Q. What do you think the chances of me being pregnant are? I'm kind of worried and would really appreciate any input. I don't always take my birth control at EXACTLY the same time every day but always before bed and I would rate my forgetfulness at...
A. 14 May 2009: Signs to look for:
breast tenderness
exhaustion
sweating at night as you sleep
nausea
slight spotting
Regardless if you have skipped your period, if you are pregnant, your hormone levels will be off the charts. Take an at home pregnancy te... (read in full...)
How can I know when a girl is in love with me?
Q. So there is this girl at our church who smiles at me all the time. She hardly takes her eyes of me when ever she see me,be it at church, bus etc She is very cute but only 17 yrs old while i'm 23. So i ignored her all the time. But now that i ...
A. 14 May 2009: My friend, I wish it were that simple. :)
The best advice I can give to you is:
Have humbleness in your heart.
Love unconditionally but know that Love is not always accepted.
No ONE is perfect, be forgiving & patient.
Don't put yourself in... (read in full...)
Do you think he'll miss me enough to give me a second chance?
Q. As soon as I met my now ex I had a huge crush on him, but he completely dissed me. So a couple of months later when I had completely forgotten about him I had him for a class. We started talking for about two or three months then he asked me to be ...
A. 14 May 2009: He most certainly misses you but he is deeply hurt, feels violated/betrayal, and doesn't trust you.
Betrayal and breaking one's trust are the proverbial lines that most people draw that shouldn't be crossed. They are ethos that make a persons ... (read in full...)
Why does having sex with someone make me start to have feelings?
Q. Why does having sex with someone make me start to have feelings? I've been having a sexual relationship with a guy I hardly know off and on for a year and sometimes I feel like I love him I know this can't be true just wondering why sex causes that ...
A. 14 May 2009: I can't speak for all the men but as for me, I can't sleep with a woman unless it is a real relationship. I wasn't always like that but.... Sex is a fabulous thing! It is good for our health, reduces stress, connects our souls, lowers inhibitio... (read in full...)
Can he hold a grudge and be over me at the same time?
Q. I was with my boyfriend for almost a year. We broke up and really it was my fault. I had cheated on him and during the first months of our relationship i actually liked his friend, which he later found out. However, after i told him that i had been...
A. 13 May 2009: First I want to say that I am proud of you for owning your role in the break up.
I am concerned that he is keeping you just close enough to verbally abuse you and make you miserable. It is passive agressive but he can get away with it because ... (read in full...)
They pick on me..do they like me?
Q. I am in highschool. A freshmen. There is this girl that started to pick on me. Then she tells me to shutup when i talk. Then she tells me she hates me than that she is just joking. But she finds anything to say to talk to me. Does rhe like me. ps. ...
A. 13 May 2009: Be on the offensive and ask one of them out. Don't be rude and don't be mean to them but don't be passive either.
If you show confidence, be playful with them, and ask one of them out, this will polarize them picking on you.
Telling you t... (read in full...)
She showed up late, made me pay, then texted another guy during a date
Q. Heya, this is going to sound rather stupid but whatever. Not too long ago, I went to the cinemas with a girl who comes into the shop I work at. I was very optimistic about how the evening would go, but I knew it was going to go bad when she sho...
A. 13 May 2009: You are a young gentleman and she is not grateful of you. Move along mate, there are a ton of women out there that appreciate a man such as yourself. ... (read in full...)
Mister sadness
Q. Yea i was dating a girl for over a year and she started talking to another guy to date while we were datin. NOW we broke up and i moved on and i still have feelings for her and now she wants me back because i started datin another girl what do i do ...
A. 13 May 2009: Be true to you your feelings and speak with her. Be sure you understand your concerns and discuss both your and her concerns and feelings.
... (read in full...)
Was this misunderstanding blown out of proportion or was I being insensitive?
Q. Please help, I am completely baffled. So yesterday, my boyfriend and i made plans to play tennis. On the way to the court, my friend was checking his stocks on his blackberry and then when we got to the court, it was being occupied. The players ...
A. 13 May 2009: The only thing that is bigger than this guys ego, is his ability to be an ass!
This boy is a big, selfish baby and needs to be sent packing. Really now, what does he bring to the relationship? I am sorry to say but when it comes to you, you are ... (read in full...)
I can't stop thinking of this former nephew, (by marriage)!
Q. Hello all, Just over a week ago, I was at a funeral for my children's grandmother on their father's side. We have been divorced 7 years now, he's remarried and all is good. So, I was re-acquainted with everyone, including one of my nephew's (by...
A. 13 May 2009: A river will always flow along the path of least resistence. Are you the river or the dam that prevents this flow?
A. The timing seems to be right
B. If you do not act on this you will always wonder
C. I think you would be bonkers NOT to p... (read in full...)
My girl wants to use a strap-on, on me
Q. My girl friend asked me if i would let her use a strap-on on me.i told her i would have to think about it and i just dont know what to tell her now.i dont know if that would make me gay...
A. 13 May 2009: It doesn't make you gay and I say go for it!
I think you should do more research about prostate stimulation and the sexual upside that can be had by this xp.
Incidentally, and I don't know why I know this, but the official term for this situati... (read in full...)
How can I know when a girl is in love with me?
Q. So there is this girl at our church who smiles at me all the time. She hardly takes her eyes of me when ever she see me,be it at church, bus etc She is very cute but only 17 yrs old while i'm 23. So i ignored her all the time. But now that i ...
A. 13 May 2009: Communication is key here to determine her level of interest in you. Simply put, you should ask her how she feels about you.
She may be intimidated by the age difference as well so be sensitive to that aspect. ... (read in full...)
How to get a straight answer from a guy?
Q. Ive slept with this guy a couple of times, and its been really great and we get on so well. but i dont know if its just me hes sleeping with or ..i just dont know? (btw its long to explain but hes your typical guy that doesnt make much effort t...
A. 13 May 2009: Just tell him that you are moving on as you feel that the relationship has run its course. Don't wait on him to respond to you, tell him you are moving on, period.
It will be your closure.... (read in full...)
Cheating with a married man, but I know its not right
Q. i am 21yrs,in luv with a married man with 4 kids,my concience is now telling on me and i want to quit him but is pretty tough on both side cos he is more now like my best friend and i believe he loves me that he wish to marry me but i cant, cos of ...
A. 13 May 2009: Leave him now, today. It is the right thing to do. Leave him and tell him that you can not see him again.
... (read in full...)
I want to sing but have a confidence issue
Q. Hey guys, I'm sorry that this isn't much of a relationship issue, but i couldn't think of anyone else to ask... Right, my issue is, i want to do something different with my life, i want to sing! And i don't mean in the local forum etc, i mean b...
A. 13 May 2009: "What would you attempt to do if you could not fail?"
When I was your age, I wanted to go to the Air Force Academy and become an Astronaut but I also doubted myself. That was 1990. Just a few months ago, I lost my job doing something that I p... (read in full...)
Does he want out? Or is he just sulking?
Q. I really need some advice! My partner, whom I live with, had a big tantrum. He was having trouble with his internet and asked me to call up the provider about it. I used to work for the company and was having a chat with the operator as the systems ...
A. 13 May 2009: Would you leave without saying a word or turn your phone off to avoid his calls? If you did, he would blow a gasket.
He is being a baby and sounds incredibly selfish. He is more than sulking, yes, the relationship is failing, but I don't th... (read in full...)
IF he wanted to fix it why hasn't he called?
Q. My ex and I were together for a couple of months but we were never official because he didnt see the need to label everything and just wanted to "be with each other" He wanted to have sex but I said I only do that with my boyfriend and he thought I ...
A. 13 May 2009: He is playing the victim only to get you close enough to him to hopefully sleep with but to also keep his options open if something new comes along.
If you sleep with him and then he gets a new girlfriend, you will use the sex as a point of refer... (read in full...)
Should I stay or go after my husband's affair?
Q. My husband had an affair with a work colleague last year they told each other they loved each other, she was married with a kid aswell. She looks like me and he told me she acted like me. I do not know if i should leave him. He says he regrets it ...
A. 13 May 2009: :(
If you are willing and you think it can work, I recommend both personal counseling for you as well as marriage counseling for the two of you.
I think it would be wise for you to keep your communication about how you are feeling frequent... (read in full...)
Best friend cheated with my b/f, don't know if I can forgive her
Q. my best friend slept with my boyfriend at the time they both say it was a mistake but they allways text and have been meeting up behind my back. i ended it with my boyfriend because i couldnt trust him. and i say... once a cheater always a cheater!...
A. 13 May 2009: Ah man that sucks! My former best friend slept with my brother's girlfriend which as you know, is universally not cool!
I am not sure how women are but when it comes to men, the guilty friend is told that they have to tow the line on their ow... (read in full...)
His "bedroom talk" really confused me and now he doesn't contact me
Q. ive been kind of seeing this guy since january i found that he really liked me and made the mistake of sleeping with him the first night.He started talking about would i have anymore kids and marriage and i freaked and later on i told him i wouldnt ...
A. 13 May 2009: I think the two of you need to make time to discuss things so that there is closure for you. Stop guessing on this one.
As a man though, based on what you have said, I can tell you that he is not interested in you.
Not sure you can say that... (read in full...)
I really like him but don't want this to just be a "work thing"
Q. I need some advice, I have liked this guy I work with for a couple of years, he shows an interest and is always checking me out, we have never been on a date (I have asked once and something came up and he couldn't make it), we french kissed about ...
A. 13 May 2009: Relationships at work are a very difficult topic. I would strongly advise against it because it will most likely only hurt your professional image and future growth.
Dating a coworker will more than likely become the topic of discussion in the o... (read in full...)
How do I help my friend clear her name up? They had sex in the school park & everyone is talking about it
Q. Hello cupids, ok so my friend and her boyfriend (now her ex) has had sex in a school park..so while they were having sex this one girl claimed that she seen them.so now the girl who have seen them been going around our whole school telling ppl what ...
A. 13 May 2009: Her is how she can clean up her rep:
1. Stop having sex
2. If she must have sex, stop having sex in public
3. You need to stop confirming that your friend did indeed have sex.
4. Assume that EVERYONE knows the truth already and just sto... (read in full...)
Is her stomach hurting because she hasn't had sex?
Q. Hello everyone,okay so my friend is 14 years old and she is has had sex with multiple partners,she has told me she used condoms everytime and her stomach has been hurting lately and she told me she hasnt has sex for a while..could that be the ...
A. 13 May 2009: It could be any number of reasons and your friend should consult with a doctor.... (read in full...)
I never get asked out properly, but am offered "one offs"
Q. Can I ask a question about blokes, I mean I have always thought if a guy likes you he will ask you out proper but guys never ask me out they always offer one-offs, my friends keep saying that's what blokes do now, they don't want to commit to going ...
A. 13 May 2009: You thinking is spot on and kudos to you for maintaining your virtuous sensibilities.
The next time one of those chaps gets dodgy with his question, tell him "I am a lady and only date gentlemen with the sense to ask me out on a proper date!" o... (read in full...)
8 years together and he's leaving me, but I still love him!
Q. i want to know , how do i get over a man i loved for 8 years . he broke up with me 2 weeks ago saying he just wanted to be friends,we have built a life and family together , 3 children,buying a house...we sometimes would fight like most people do ...
A. 13 May 2009: First let me say that my heart goes out to you. Second, you don't just "get over" someone. It is ok for you to still love him, don't deny yourself that truth. I was with my wife for 9 years and have been divorced for over 3 years but I stil... (read in full...)
How do I tell a guy I want to get sexual?
Q. I have been on 2 seperate dates with this guy I like. Ive known him for awhile but just recently let him know I liked him. Hes made several sexual comments (nothing involving us two-but hes def not the prudish type). I would have sex with him but...
A. 13 May 2009: Find time to make out and once you are both aroused, let your fingers do the talking. A subtle yet deliberate over-the-pants quick stroke of his manhood should get things going. If he is still slow to catch on, whisper in his ear and tell him that ... (read in full...)
How can I win back the control with my fella?
Q. For the past couple of months i feel as though i have lost control in my relationship and now all i do is hang on to my partners every word. i want to feel in control again! i seem more keen than him these days, and when we argue i am always the ...
A. 13 May 2009: I see the real issue being that you are afraid that he could go off with someone else. Why is that do you suppose? You should ask yourself that question.
Has he marginalized you or made you feel insignificant?
Does he disrespect you?
Do you... (read in full...)
Why was I wrong to entice older men?
Q. I started having sex when I was 13, and every one of my partners were adult men. There was no coercion or force involved in any of them. I consented to the encounters, and I initiated the sex on each occasion. This did not negatively impact my life. ...
A. 13 May 2009: Do you feel it was wrong?... (read in full...)
How can I know when a girl is in love with me?
Q. So there is this girl at our church who smiles at me all the time. She hardly takes her eyes of me when ever she see me,be it at church, bus etc She is very cute but only 17 yrs old while i'm 23. So i ignored her all the time. But now that i ...
A. 13 May 2009: I am not certain if you are in the US or India. Obviously there are laws to abide by as well as religious/ethnic traditions that one may choose to follow. An Indian friend of mine that lives here in the US actually had his marriage arrange... (read in full...)
I really don't know what to do...
Q. I really don't know what to do... ive been with my boyfriend for only 8 months, and i love him so much... its that kind of love that isnt exiting but its always there kind of love. like youde do anything for them... almost everything. but about 10...
A. 13 May 2009: You are not happy with the relationship that you are in now. That is ok. You are allowed to be you and feel the way you feel. You say that your current relationship is, "reasonably happy" meaning that you are comfortable with it...as a second ... (read in full...)
How should I take this friendship?
Q. My guy friend at school that I've known since september is weird. At school he stares at me, makes me laugh, texts me occasionally, and sometimes he mentions a teacher I hate that he loves just to make me talk to him. Today I was talking to his ...
A. 13 May 2009: The two of you like each other, that is obvious. The both of you are also playing games and being coy about things. It is at times like this that I ask myself, "WWPD" Or rather, What Would Peter Griffin Do? Peter would probably point at ... (read in full...)
| *r.Insignificant's friends
These are mutual friends, so *r.Insignificant has
added them and they have added *r.Insignificant!
|
