A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:i am 21yrs,in luv with a married man with 4 kids,my concience is now telling on me and i want to quit him but is pretty tough on both side cos he is more now like my best friend and i believe he loves me that he wish to marry me but i cant, cos of his status and i wldnt want him to divorce his wife cos i know her and she is a good woman wat do i do?
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female
reader, bellaaddison  +, writes (13 May 2009):
I speak from personal experience when I tell you that this is a dead end road. I had a best friend too, once. Now we don't speak. We have nothing left between us other than bitterness and anger. I too knew his wife and thought highly of her as well. I'd hate to tell you the things she's said about me and how she feels about me now and the worst part of it all is that she's justified in what she says and how she feels.
Believe me when I tell you, he will not leave her, ever, and sooner of later she will find out. Not only will he dismiss you like yesterday's garbage but you will question your own self worth because of it all. And that's only the selfish debris that's left behind... THEY will have to fight to rebuild trust, rebuild their family; they will struggle with issues for years to come, ultimately affecting their children. THE WHOLE THING IS A NIGHTMARE! If you can get out before you earn the starring role in this horror show, do it! You'll feel better about yourself in knowing you did the right thing and sooner or later, you'll find someone who you can love that will be capable and able to love you in return.
Good Luck!
Bella
xoxo
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2009): you know what to do - sleeping with a MM, with 4 kids. a big NO NO. and you know his wife. how do you even face her. or how do you even face yourself. where are the morals? you are just this man's f*ck buddy. what best friend and what status? is he your married lover or your best friend??? are you not sleeping with a married man, well newsflash for you below.
if you are feeling soooooooooo guilty just do the right thing, that is if you even know what the right thing is. i hope the good woman wife gives him what is really coming to him - a painful divorce, i hope she milks the situation for everything and that she gets a hefty financial settlement. aLSO more wives are now getting more divorce settlements because they attack the husbands lover ( meaning YOU) for breaking hom their home. Yes, you. if the wife can show that she had a happy marriage and then you came on the scene and stole her h/b's affection then babes, she will make mincemeat out of you.
you have a choice, so please choose wisely. if you enjoy being the homewrecker that you are, just continue in the manner that you are. the wheel will turn and babes, it's an ugly wheel when it is flattening you. and you can then have him and HIS 4 CHILDREN as well. Nice, step momma you will make! and nice sugar daddy he will make!
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A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (13 May 2009):
 I understand that you are in love with this man but you cannot continue this relationship. He will never leave his wife for you and he will never marry you - you are just his bit on the side, something to make life more exctiting.
You deserve to be with a man that can give you his full undivided attention, someone who truly loves you and can give you everything you need. This married man can only offer you a tiny ammount of his heart and time - the rest is devoted to his children and wife.
Think of the children in this and it should make it easier for you to end things - could you imagine as a child finding out that daddy had been having an affair with another woman? You would hate your father for doing that and you would hate the other woman for wrecking the family. Affairs never end well, and they only end up hurting people in the process. While you will be hurting because you cannot be with the man you love, this pain will be much less than the children's pain if they found out or the wife's pain if she found out what her husband is doing with you.
Be the bigger person here - if you can end this and stay away from him for good then it shows that you are a good person with a conscience. Marriage is sacred and should not be played around with. This man is a poor excuse of a man, he clearly has no heart if he can do such a thing to his wife and children. Would you really want to marry a man when you know he is capable of cheating? If he has cheated on his wife with you, then why would he be any different if he was married to you?
End this now, and never go back. You will be doing the right thing, even if at times it is hard and hurts you a lot.
I hope this helps!
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A
female
reader, Lilly Rose +, writes (13 May 2009):
 If you can carry on like this for another 15 years....and be happy and can share him with another women then i would say stay with him.....love is hard just to say end it becoz its a bad situation. Talk to him see what he wants for the future...does he want to leave his wife? Your always be the 'other women' if you can live with that and your enjoying life with him, then carry on...but the guilt will catch up with you...so just make sure its worth it and that he loves you the same way you love him!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2009): How old is this man?? Get a grip on yourself and stop doing what you know to be wrong. Your subconcious mind is playing up for a reason. Be a decent person and get out and find a single man to play with. I mean, afterall a man that will cheat on his wife sounds like such a catch, doesn't he. And a silly little girl who will cheat with a married man sounds like a catch too - what's so bad in your life that you have to behave like this??
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A
male
reader, Mr.Insignificant +, writes (13 May 2009):
 Leave him now, today. It is the right thing to do. Leave him and tell him that you can not see him again.
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A
female
reader, BethyBoo  +, writes (13 May 2009):
 End the relationship. It's wrong for everyone. He is being unfaithful, you are obviously on the other side of that and this will hurt his wife and children greatly.
Cheating is so easy but you need to draw the line and tell him what he is doing to the ones he loves.
I don't mean to sound harsh but imagine if you were his wife and he was cheating on you and your children. It's just not fair.
I hope all goes well xx
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