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*luntasaspoon agony aunt

*luntasaspoon

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*luntasaspoon's profile:

i have had quite a lot of relationships and all my mates are always asking and taking advice from me (even my dad)! i am a divorcee and have 2 kids. i have been the cheater, the one who has been cheated on, the one who has had an affair with a married amn and also the one who has had a relationship with an older and younger man.

i hate falsness and i also hate seeing people in a relationship that obviously aint right for them.

12Next > [2 pages, 57 answers]

We got into my argument over my husband's drinking and he hit me!

Q.   My husband and I got into am arguement over him drinking and coming home smelling like alcohol, so the other night he informed me that he was drinking a beer while driving home, that did not sit well with me, all I ask os that he not come home ...

A.   1 April 2012: i was in love with someone like that, everytime it was an "i'm so so sorry that happened, i swear it will never happen again, i will get help if you promise to stay with me" so i stayed with him and he kept hitting me. i finally realised that the ... (read in full...)

Has he moved on and is he a womanizer?

Q.   Mod note: This is two questions put into one. Hi every one. I would be happy if you would answer my question. I'v been in a relationship with a guy. We were both happy. He always tells me how he loves me when we are chatting(sms) but the thing is...

A.   1 April 2012: the answer to both in my opinion is yes. your friend sounds like an enemy, someone who see's your happy and hates it. my advise is to leave him be, dont reply to the txt's, ur only 16-17 so go out there and find someone who loves you and wants ... (read in full...)

Has he moved on and is he a womanizer?

Q.   Mod note: This is two questions put into one. Hi every one. I would be happy if you would answer my question. I'v been in a relationship with a guy. We were both happy. He always tells me how he loves me when we are chatting(sms) but the thing is...

A.   1 April 2012: the answer to both in my opinion is yes. your friend sounds like an enemy, someone who see's your happy and hates it. my advise is to leave him be, dont reply to the txt's, ur only 16-17 so go out there and find someone who loves you and wants ... (read in full...)

I'm tired of being alone!

Q.   I feel so alone, i sit and watch all my friends be with their partners and i long to be close with someone. I've been single for a couple of years now and i'm tired of being alone. Guess i just need some encouraging words as i'm not sure how to ...

A.   1 April 2012: look hun your only in your 20s for crying out loud, you have plenty of time to find somebody and settle down. i think everyone i know complains when their single then complains when their in a relationship as well and i am one of these people who ... (read in full...)

Should I become a bad girl to get his attention?

Q.   Hi i am 16 years old and have never had a boyfriend. I really like this guy but I know he doesn't like me in return and even if he does I don't have the confidence to ask him out. The thing is I am just too nice: i have good manners, i am polite and ...

A.   1 April 2012: be exactly who you are and whatever you do dont worry about losing your v plates, i know someone who lost his at 18, and he was good looking and had the girls after him all the time. but he waited until he found the right person. you shouldn't ... (read in full...)

Is it weird to be single at my age?

Q.   I am 25 and have been single now for almost 6 years. I still live at home with my parents and have just a handful of friends. I was recently seeing a guy but that has fizzled out. I worry so much what other people think....is it weird to be single ...

A.   1 April 2012: you take life by the goonies and go it alone. just because your friends are settled down does not mean you have to be. dont worry about going on holiday on your own, its much more fun when you can do what you want, when you want and with whomever ... (read in full...)

I'm 36 years old but still not sure whether I am interested in men or women

Q.   Hi all, I'm already 36 yo but still not sure whether I should commit with a man or woman. When I was a teenager, I had a strong feeling toward girls. However I was also interested in guys. Time went by, my interest in guys has increased while ...

A.   1 April 2012: hey hun, sounds to me like you are one confused bunny. you obviously know what you want which is a family, you are also not the only one out there who has a bdsm fetish, find like minded people online and join some groups to do with the bdsm fetish ... (read in full...)

Time spent on the computer is interfering with my schooling

Q.   I am 17 years old,, n I am grade 11 student. I want to be Computer Engineer.., I usually spent my time on computer.., incase of this I am not doing good at my education.. n my dad is sad of me.. n wants me to concentrate only on my education...

A.   1 April 2012: if you want to be a computer engineer then would'nt it be wise to get a good education? no one will hire someone who has amazing experience with computers but has no qualifications. go to school and limit yourself to an hour a day on the comp.... (read in full...)

Never been in a relationship, would like to let him know I'm interested

Q.   hi I'm 17 years old. I've never been in a relationship cause i usually freak out when asked on a date. I honestly don't know whats wrong with me.there are quite a number of guys that asked me out but i rejected them. Recently my friend told me this ...

A.   1 April 2012: Hey hunni, ok so 17 is a great age to be, i think that your best bet is not to tell him you like him as that could make things really awkward, esp if his mate was just playing you, talk to him on msn, facebook or skype. get to know him a bit before ... (read in full...)

How long should I stay mad?

Q.   How long should I stay mad?? My husband and I were out last night my husband went outside to check the car and when he came back reeked of pot, we are very religous and he could get in a lot of trouble! When I asked him he lied at first. How long ...

A.   9 October 2008: ok i know this sounds silly but staying mad at a bloke for a few days never works. they just see you as uptight, annoying and probably controlling. you have obviously had a major head fit at him and good on you for that. but seriously staying away ... (read in full...)

How do I increase my libido? It's ruining my life. I feel molested when we have sex because I do it just to please him...

Q.   Does anyone know of any natural remedie to increase female libido? My Husband is a scorpio and he wants sex 24/7. I don't have any desire at all or I am just not sexually attracted to him, it's a problem I am only 30 years old. Please help, I...

A.   9 October 2008: ok here goes... now i dont know you from adam but i am gonna do what i do.. and that is going by my instincts... i really hope i dont hurt your feelings and i really really dont want u to go mental. it seems to me that at some point in your past, ... (read in full...)

Should I give up my studies to become a model?

Q.   Hey, I am 19 years old. Do you think giving up my studies and doing modelling is a good option? I really am interested in acting and modelling but I am doing medicine, pursuing to be a doctor. I don't know if its worthwhile. Advise please!...

A.   9 October 2008: ok here goes... if u do the moddling and the studies then u will always have options but if u just do the moddling and it falls thru then u gotta re do ur college. and if u just do the college then u will always wonder what if. so my adv... (read in full...)

I have just found my daughters diary while sorting out her clothes for washing.

Q.   I have just found my daughters diary while sorting out her clothes for washing. I know I should not have done but I read the last few pages that she had wrote on and I am worried she is going to do something stupid. The last entry says that ...

A.   9 October 2008: basically ...AAARGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH every mums nightmare. but... goodness this goes against every bone in my being but... at least she is on about getting condoms and going on the pill. thats the silver lining no matter how dull it is, she is at ... (read in full...)

I need help coming up with some romantic ideas!

Q.   Hi, I was just wondering if any one knew or could think of any romantic ideas for me and my partner. My partner has been away for two weeks and would like to do something romantic on his return. Thanking you in advance x...

A.   4 September 2008: ok i did this once and it knocked my hubbys socks off. first get a soft blanket or throw and put it on the sofa. get dressed in the nicest undies that u own and put a dress on that is easy to take off. cook a meal (steak works best)make su... (read in full...)

What do you do if your partner is hiding porn and lying about it?

Q.   iv been with my boyfriend for over 2 years now we have lived together for nearly 2 yrs, hes never been into porn so i thought hes never mentioned it or anything although weve watched it a few times. im okay with him watching porn but not when hes ...

A.   4 September 2008: yes u are over reacting a bit. he isnt sleeping with them and as he is away for so long each time he needs some form of release lol. he is only a man after all. maybe u could take some pic's of urself and hide them in his travel bag next time he ... (read in full...)

This stunning girl I met at a club is only 17! Is this okay?

Q.   I met a girl in a club few weeks ago and we hit it off really well im 25 and was surprised when this stunner started talking to me. We had a lot in common and she told me she was 19 and at uni! We exchanged numbers and then since then we ha...

A.   4 September 2008: ahh not good. lying to someone about their age is bad. my 17 yr old brother only just found out that a girl he was seeing who first told him she was 18 then told him she was 17, and then!! he saw her birth certificate in her bedroom stating that she ... (read in full...)

Should I be angry or have mercy? My dad cheated on my mom.

Q.   hey i dont know whats right anymore! ok so my father cheated on my mom... and then he is still living in our home but he is being insulted by my other relatives and others are saying he is a shame to our family...a part of me feels sorry for him i ...

A.   4 September 2008: ok u seem furious at the moment and have just blurted out whats annoying u. a few questions that would help us give u good advice are when did this happen, does ur mum know, do u know who it was with and are your parents still talking to eachothe... (read in full...)

Should I just 'go for it' so she'll know I'm interested?

Q.   Hey there, I am really liking a girl at the moment- to the point where i can't stop thinking about her and am having trouble sleeping but i can't tell how she feels about me. I am very unexperienced in these situations so am feeling pretty lost. I'...

A.   4 September 2008: aww bless ur in love. if she has agreed to meeting u out for two drinks already and it is just u two then i think that u have got a good chance with her. i wouldnt make a move just yet though, take her for an "official date". phone her up and just ... (read in full...)

Beard or Sheared?

Q.   I am trying to get close to girl at the moment and am hoping to make a move over the few times we go out but i am wondering if i should shave. I have about 10 days worth of growth and like to keep it that way because i think i look far too young ...

A.   4 September 2008: a few questions..... has she seen u freshly shaved? has she commented on ur appearence when u shave/do not shave? u need to think what suits u as well as what she likes. personally i hate it when my hubby leaves his beard for a few days coz it looks ... (read in full...)

Am I being unreasonable by wanting to leave my house to my children rather than my husband?

Q.   Hi. I have been with my husband for two years. He moved into the house that I own from proceeds of a settlement from a previous relationship that produced children.. he came with basically nothing just a good wage. Since we were married my ...

A.   4 September 2008: ouch! if u guys are having problems and he is not listening to and going into the i dont belong here speech, i think that maybe he has totally changed since u got married? if so then tell him straight. it's your house and u will do with it what u ... (read in full...)

Is it normal to want kids, but not want the sex or the husband?

Q.   Is it normal to want kids, but not want the sex or the husband? People say i'll grow out of this feeling but i am not sure whether i will. I would love to be a mother but a sex slaving wife, no thanks. Is what i am feeling normal as i am not a child ...

A.   4 September 2008: i recon that u have had a bad relationship with someone(mum probably?) and u dont want to make the same mistakes as she/he did? dont worry about that as we learn from our's and others mistakes. dont be afraid of having children with or without ... (read in full...)

My mate has told me the biggest secret any woman can tell another woman. What do I do?

Q.   right b4 u say it no it is not me..... i have been duped with the biggest secret any woman can tell another woman. basically my mate slept with her ex of 6 yrs ago about a month ago. thats not all.... she is married to my husbands cousin an...

A.   4 September 2008: just an update. i have asked her not to keep talking to me about it as it kinda hurts my feelings to see her openly talking about it to me whenever we are alone. her relationship with her hubby has got better thankfully but the thing is, now she ... (read in full...)

Will he be faithful if he decides I'm the one for him?

Q.   This is a follow up to this question http://www.dearcupid.org/question/how-do-i-know-if-he-does-decide.html Ok I spent all of Monday with him....we even ended up having sex on the back porch...smh....but before and after any of that happened He ...

A.   20 August 2008: just wait a while longer, it sounds like he has already kinda made his mind up by telling and showing this other girl that he is with u. but dont pressure him, enjoy it as it is at the moment and when the time is right u will know coz he will tell u ... (read in full...)

Is it ok for us to masturbate together?

Q.   Hi, I've been wandering whether it would be alright for me(male and my cousin(female) to masturbate together? We're both the same age and are really close. Please reply, Thanks...

A.   20 August 2008: ok then i personally think that it is a bit wrong especially if u dont want a relationship. but if u are both consenting the why not? i'll tell u why.... u are both a bit too young and should realy think about how it will affect your friendship with ... (read in full...)

Am I moving too fast?

Q.   i am 14 ,15 in december and i had sex wif my girl friend i have only been goin out wif her 4 2 weeks am i movin 2 fast...

A.   20 August 2008: i think that u may well be moving to quickly. just imagine if it was your daughter who had had sex with a 14 yr old? how would u feel?. i also think that u know that u are moving too fast or u wouldnt have asked.... (read in full...)

She said the age gap was to small - what's a 'proper' age gap for couples?

Q.   me and my girlfriend met two years back and i had to leave my country a week after we met for studies an stuff. We had a really good connection since then, we trusted and respected each other. We had a short holiday 3 months ago which i decided to ...

A.   20 August 2008: she may want a more serious relationship and feels that only realy older men can give that? or maybe she liked the idea of having a long distance relationship but without the commitment? either way she has split up with u and used the age gap ... (read in full...)

Am I being unreasonable by wanting to leave my house to my children rather than my husband?

Q.   Hi. I have been with my husband for two years. He moved into the house that I own from proceeds of a settlement from a previous relationship that produced children.. he came with basically nothing just a good wage. Since we were married my ...

A.   20 August 2008: i think that he is being unreasonabl in asking that of u but at the same time i feel that u may be being a bit harsh as well. when u die u dont want your husband to be left out on the street's. how about your children get to decide what to do with ... (read in full...)

I want to break up with my boyfriend who helped and supported me through my breakdown...

Q.   right, well... i sent a question a few hours ago, explaining that i had a nervous breakdown wen i had a miscarrige, n that resulted in me breaking up with my boyfriend, and i got back with my ex who helped me through the breakdown... ...

A.   20 August 2008: just tell him straight. get it over and done with and dont shout! he wont think that ur being serious if u do. i know that it is hard to split up with him coz of how much he has supported u but if ur not happy then split up. if u do it soon then it ... (read in full...)

My boyfriend thinks it's his job to parent me on chores. Is this normal male behaviour?

Q.   My boyfriend and I are having some issues. He thinks its his job to parent me on chores. I have been doing better to remind myself to do things since I also have other things I focus on like school, and job hunting. He says I have gotten better then ...

A.   20 August 2008: ok then. here goes.... tell him straight to stop treating u like a child. and remind him that u are not his daughter. also ask him why he is treating u like this. i think that it is really wierd behaviour, especially from a man, normally its us w... (read in full...)

Is it normal to want kids, but not want the sex or the husband?

Q.   Is it normal to want kids, but not want the sex or the husband? People say i'll grow out of this feeling but i am not sure whether i will. I would love to be a mother but a sex slaving wife, no thanks. Is what i am feeling normal as i am not a child ...

A.   20 August 2008: completly normal hun. but in all honesty it is like that for the first few yrs then u kinda find ur groove, me n my hubby bin together 6 yrs got 2 kids under 4 and we have only just realised that it works a lot better if we treat each other as ... (read in full...)

I can't remember what I did with my tampon at my friend's house!

Q.   Argh!!! I had a blank spot and I took out my tampon at my friends house and I can't remember what I did with it!!! They didn't have a bin and it's really bugging me that I flushed it down the loo, coz, though I'm not sure, it could get stuck. even ...

A.   20 August 2008: aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrgggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!! dont worry about it hun it dont matter if u flush it they dont normally get stuck unless there is a problem with the waste pipe. but i can probably guarantee that if they did find it they ... (read in full...)

I'm stressed, and sexually weak. I never used to be like this.

Q.   i am 22 yrs old male.i am felling some sexual weak ness from last 3 months.sometime my penis doesnot erect some times it erect,and it's losing it's length, i am feeling very stressed.i don't what should i do,my physical condition is very good. i ...

A.   20 August 2008: sounds like u have a bit of depression. dont fret and please go to the doctor. u done the right thing by asking about it here so now u need to take the next step and go to ur gp. ... (read in full...)

I'm stressed, and sexually weak. I never used to be like this.

Q.   i am 22 yrs old male.i am felling some sexual weak ness from last 3 months.sometime my penis doesnot erect some times it erect,and it's losing it's length, i am feeling very stressed.i don't what should i do,my physical condition is very good. i ...

A.   20 August 2008: sounds like u have a bit of depression. dont fret and please go to the doctor. u done the right thing by asking about it here so now u need to take the next step and go to ur gp. ... (read in full...)

I'm in love with a teacher. Will these feelings go away?

Q.   I'm 16 and I've been in love with this teacher for 2 years now. At first it was obsession. I know so much about him because he's my cousin's best friend. So its like he's a part of the family. Always at family parties and stuff. But anyway it reall...

A.   20 August 2008: hey hun i wouldnt tell him how u feel coz it may get him into trouble as u are still in school. but as for the feeling thing i think that u may have a really really big crush on him. try not to think about it all the time and hope that these ... (read in full...)

I haven't seen my boyfriend all summer. Should I run over and kiss him when I see him? I'm 12 years old by the way.

Q.   Hi, I'm 12 years old, and I'm going into 7th grade soon. The thing is, I haven't seen my boyfriend ALL summer. And I miss him terribly. I have a slight chance of seeing him when he gets back, but I dunno if I will. I was wonderng, what should I when...

A.   11 August 2008: its not that bad honest! when i was 13 i went to a type of summer camp, i left my boyfriend at home and when i got back it was me that ran up to him and gave him a big hug not the other way round. so dont worry about what others say or think just do ... (read in full...)

I don't trust my boyfriend - what should I think about this...

Q.   so, i met a great guy, or so I think, he tells me he loves me althought hasn't been that long, calls me constantly, emails, texts, talks about a future, the whole 9 yards. The problem is, last week I was with him and he got 2 messages from 2 other ...

A.   11 August 2008: hunny i think that u might be being played, either that or he is keeping his options open. either way u need to ask yourelf this "do u really want to be with someone like this?"... (read in full...)

Other women would have left, should i? or am I over reacting?

Q.   ok i really need help! frist off i know i might be over reacting abit but i really am stressing out ok here goes my fiance and i live together right a two bedroom one bath house im the only one who cleans as i dont work at the moment a...

A.   11 August 2008: no hun ur not wrong and if it was me i think i wud leave and go back home. u are too young to be dealing with this kinda crap and i think that u really need to speak to ur partner and explain to him that while they are there u will not be? i hope ... (read in full...)

Sex mad husband and making me have sex whilst drugged?

Q.   I am writing about my 10 year marriage, that I feel so burn out on at the moment. My husband and I have never had a fabulous sex life; in fact, I have never been that physically attracted to him at all. We conceived our daughter after only knowing ...

A.   11 August 2008: if i remember rightly, when u wake up in the morning after one of "those nights" take a urine sample of your own and take it too the doctors. speak to a female doctor and tell her your suspicions, give her the sample and ask her if she could test it ... (read in full...)

Should I tell his family my version of the story if it will assist me in getting over this?

Q.   I have been in an 8 year relationship with a man and he has dumped me over and over again so he could go sit out at the lake all summer without feeling guilty.He has promised me twice that we would move in together, then has literally put me and my ...

A.   10 August 2008: yeah go to the police... (read in full...)

He tells me their affair has ended, can I believe him? Why are they still talking??

Q.   My husband had an affair. We have been married for almost 13 years. He has apologized and said that he would not cheat again, and that he wanted to close the door to that part of his life. He said he wants to work things out with me. For the ...

A.   10 August 2008: sorry to say this but i think that he may be still having this affair. after all who calls up an ex and asks her about a confrence at stupid o clock in the morning. i think that a councillor may be in need for u 2, and also if his ex said to ask him ... (read in full...)

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