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... Send *our big sis a private message | | | *our big sis's profile: I have always been drawn to help others out whether it's emotionally, physically, and financially. I had a great role model- my mother. She was dedicated to helping women and children suffering from domestic abuse and I can't remember how many people my mom helped- there were so many, but I do remember the faces of relief when help was offered. We had one vacant room in our house and it was always occupied by a family in need. And sometimes we'd have the living room as a camp refuge. Seeing what an impact one person can do by helping another in need is my drive.
I am the oldest of 5 children. My parents divorced when I was 6 years old and we lived with my mother growing up. I helped my mother raise my younger siblings and have experienced about every question, problem, disagreement four young people could muster up. And of course, my own life trials. I guess you could say that's where I get my need to help someone in need. I'm a wife and mother of two residing in Dallas, Texas. |
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Barbie theme...any ideas?
Q. I'm planing my 17th Birthday party and i want to have a theme party. I thought what about a 'barbie and friends' theme? I know it may seem babyish, but i loved barbie! so she means alot to me and this theme relates to me alot. but one of my friends ...
A. 27 January 2006: How about calling your barbie party "The Forgotten barbies." Tell your guests they can come if they wear basically any outfit with a long blond wig, blue eye shadow, and red lipstick. IE: Gangsta barbie, Goth barbie, alien barbie, and so on. As ... (read in full...)
When my in-laws come and stay they practically take over the place!
Q. I am really struggling for some answers on how to deal with my situation. My wife and I are struggling with a certain issue which on this subject has really driven a spike between us. My wife's parents regularly come to visit at least twice a...
A. 27 January 2006: Try this: Ask your parents to stay a spell and take your parents side in the same situations you had with your in-laws. Your wife won't give in until she's in your shoes. It seems harsh, but maybe she'll see that it's not normal to have 2 months ... (read in full...)
Dumped after 5 years, I want my ex back! But he wants to have fun and sleep with other people...
Q. Me and my ex boyfriend met 5 years ago through a club we both attend. We started dating nearly 2 years ago. Although I am 18 he was my first boyfriend. It wasn't a fantastic relationship; we argued quite a bit, which was my fault. He broke up with ...
A. 27 January 2006: You and your ex are still young. And your ex even younger. You can't make him be with only you. Both of you are at a time in life where everything is new and trying new things. He's simply experimenting and enjoying his youth. It's really very ... (read in full...)
Will my girlfriend want to go further in our relationship?
Q. Hi! I'm 17 and have been with my girlfriend a month now. I've never been happier. But there is one issue that I find hard to overcome. My girlfriend was told by other people at the start of our relationship how far I had been with other girls, ...
A. 27 January 2006: There may be another reason for your girlfriend's resistance to your fast actions (c'mon 4 weeks is nothing), your ability to kiss and tell. She doesn't want to be just another girl on your history list. She's wise to wait it out to see if you're ... (read in full...)
Is she really shy or not interested, what are the behavioural differences?
Q. Is she really shy or not interested, what are the behavioural differences? Hello potential saviours and helpers Every girl I’ve ever known has been from college and my part-time job and every girl I’ve ever taken an interest in has had a boyf...
A. 27 January 2006: Sorry pal, I know it's hard to hear it but she's not interested. You've known her for seven months and she still avoids eye contact which for us ladies means we're not interested. She's being polite about it because she doesn't want to hurt your ... (read in full...)
I'm married with a baby on the way..so why can't I stop thinking of this other married man?
Q. Hello. I have been married to my husband almost four years now and we have a two year old daughter and another baby is on the way. I thought I was happily married, but I often find myself thinking of this man who is the manager at the restaurant we ...
A. 27 January 2006: During pregnancy, our libidos increase greatly because of increased bloodflow to our pelvic region which could be to blame for your attraction to the restaurant manager. I know when my hubby and I were expecting our second child this was very true. ... (read in full...)
He said he will leave with my son...
Q. what do you do when your husband tells you that you cant go out and if you do, he will leave and take your son?...
A. 27 January 2006: Your husband is abusing you. Abuse is not an accident. It is an intentional act used to gain control over another person. Be warned these are three of the first signs of domestic abuse. There are 8 paths to an abusive person's power and control. ... (read in full...)
He said he will leave with my son...
Q. what do you do when your husband tells you that you cant go out and if you do, he will leave and take your son?...
A. 27 January 2006: Your husband is abusing you. Abuse is not an accident. It is an intentional act used to gain control over another person. Be warned these are three of the first signs of domestic abuse. There are 8 paths to an abusive person's power and control. ... (read in full...)
I'm confused as to what he really wants...help!
Q. HI there, My ex, and I broke up about 11 months ago. We went out for over a year, however our relationship wasn't a proper one. I wasn't ready at the time, and he was dying to go out with someone, me (well so he claimed)! In the end, I couldn't ...
A. 27 January 2006: Dear A Very Confused Lady,
You are beating yourself up over this. Darlin' we all make mistakes at one time or another. But we learn from them and grow into better people. Your situation reminds me of the old saying, "Don't know what you got unti... (read in full...)
Is he too tight with his money??
Q. Hi iv'e been with boyfriend nearly two years but theres constant arguing. He can be elusive and tightfisted with money. I believe in splitting cost but even when out for coffee or meal, i always have to get out my exact 50%.He says this normal but ...
A. 27 January 2006: If after two years he still taking out the calculator for coffee? No, it's not normal. Everyone makes compromises in a relationship including in money matters, but this is extreme. Take him out on Valentine's Day, say it's a surprise just for ... (read in full...)
I don't feel that he's into me...
Q. I am dating a man.. at first he was very hot and heavy with me .. wanting to be with me all the time.... he now seems too busy working and doing projects with his friends and keeps saying he is too busy but would like to see me...on occasion..once a ...
A. 27 January 2006: If you had sex with him and this is the result, I'm sorry to say honey but you got used. If you did not have sex and wish to wait for that special moment, then he realized that he's not going to get sex without getting involved. Either way, his ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is threatening and capable of carrying out his threats! What do I do to get out?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been living together for about two months. It has been nothing but hell. He is emotionally and physically abusive. I'm afraid to go to the police as he has already said that after he gets out of jail, he will kill me. I know ...
A. 27 January 2006: Your life does not have to be miserable. Please call the police, tell them he has be abusing you and is now making threats on your life. A detective can refer you to a secret women's shelter at no expense to you. There are good people in the ... (read in full...)
Suddenly after 5 years together, my boyfriend hit me when he disagreed. Am I wrong not to want to sacrifice what we have over this?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 5 years and just recently I've seen a side to him that I've never seen before. We had been out drinking and something made him mad. He wanted me to go home because he was going to his house. I didn't want ...
A. 27 January 2006: Five years is a long time to be together, but it's also enough time for people to change and sometimes for the worst. Think of your personal safety. Your boyfriend has committed domestic violence which is a Class A Misdemeanor punishable by fine ... (read in full...)
Been chatting to a nice guy online... But how will he see past my "size" when we meet?
Q. Hi all..okies... i have recently been chattin to a really nice guy who i met on the internet via my holiday discussion board. Since we have been chattin for the last few weeks we've discovered that we have loads in common. The trouble is we seem ...
A. 27 January 2006: Send him a picture of yourself. You mentioned that you have seen what he looks like. It's only fair to give him the same privilege. I don't want to play Devil's Advocate but well, if he was unattractive by your standards, would you still be ... (read in full...)
What do you think his intentions really are?
Q. DOES HE REALLY LIKE ME...OR AM I FOOLING MYSELF? I need advice on a Man in my life.... I just cannot seem to work him out. Usually I am pretty good at this sort of thing so please if any one can shed some light, I would be truly grateful! My...
A. 26 January 2006: His comment to the staff member is a clear sign of previous "kissing & telling." Apparently your trainer is known to people there at the gym that he has a history of duping woman into sex. And what's worst is he's so big-headed on himself that he ... (read in full...)
What do you think his intentions really are?
Q. DOES HE REALLY LIKE ME...OR AM I FOOLING MYSELF? I need advice on a Man in my life.... I just cannot seem to work him out. Usually I am pretty good at this sort of thing so please if any one can shed some light, I would be truly grateful! My...
A. 26 January 2006: His comment to the staff member is a clear sign of previous "kissing & telling." Apparently your trainer is known to people there at the gym that he has a history of duping woman into sex. And what's worst is he's so big-headed on himself that he ... (read in full...)
What do you think his intentions really are?
Q. DOES HE REALLY LIKE ME...OR AM I FOOLING MYSELF? I need advice on a Man in my life.... I just cannot seem to work him out. Usually I am pretty good at this sort of thing so please if any one can shed some light, I would be truly grateful! My...
A. 26 January 2006: His comment to the staff member is a clear sign of previous "kissing & telling." Apparently your trainer is known to people there at the gym that he has a history of duping woman into sex. And what's worst is he's so big-headed on himself that he ... (read in full...)
What do you think his intentions really are?
Q. DOES HE REALLY LIKE ME...OR AM I FOOLING MYSELF? I need advice on a Man in my life.... I just cannot seem to work him out. Usually I am pretty good at this sort of thing so please if any one can shed some light, I would be truly grateful! My...
A. 26 January 2006: His comment to the staff member is a clear sign of previous "kissing & telling." Apparently your trainer is known to people there at the gym that he has a history of duping woman into sex. And what's worst is he's so big-headed on himself that he ... (read in full...)
What do you think his intentions really are?
Q. DOES HE REALLY LIKE ME...OR AM I FOOLING MYSELF? I need advice on a Man in my life.... I just cannot seem to work him out. Usually I am pretty good at this sort of thing so please if any one can shed some light, I would be truly grateful! My...
A. 26 January 2006: His comment to the staff member is a clear sign of previous "kissing & telling." Apparently your trainer is known to people there at the gym that he has a history of duping woman into sex. And what's worst is he's so big-headed on himself that he ... (read in full...)
What do you think his intentions really are?
Q. DOES HE REALLY LIKE ME...OR AM I FOOLING MYSELF? I need advice on a Man in my life.... I just cannot seem to work him out. Usually I am pretty good at this sort of thing so please if any one can shed some light, I would be truly grateful! My...
A. 26 January 2006: His comment to the staff member is a clear sign of previous "kissing & telling." Apparently your trainer is known to people there at the gym that he has a history of duping woman into sex. And what's worst is he's so big-headed on himself that he ... (read in full...)
Why can't she see I'm sorry for my lies... ?
Q. hi there..... me and my gf are going through a tricky patch i have been seeing her for 8 months now and love her dearly and want to be with her so much i am 29 she is 21, recently i lied about a job i lost and money to her which caused her pain and ...
A. 26 January 2006: She is right to feel wounded. Now she wonders if you had lied about anything else such as your sexual faithfulness. Think of it like this, if you had lied about 2 major deals (1. Job-a big deal, 2. Money-huge deal), what else could you get away ... (read in full...)
Does he want me back or has he moved on?
Q. my ex and i have been broken up for almost a year now. He's the one who broke up with me. Since then, he has never expressed a desire to get back together to my face, but has hinted at it. we had a few months away from one another, but have been in ...
A. 23 January 2006: Maybe during the latter part of your relationship he became very insecure about himself, you know. Maybe he felt that he wasn't "good enough" for you or "good looking" enough to have you by his side. Maybe his insecurities overwhelmed him into ... (read in full...)
I cheat on my boyfriend, usually when drunk, leading to feelings of self disgust and loathing. Could I be a sex addict?
Q. Hi, i am 21 years old and have been with my current boyfriend for 2 and a half years. i love him to bits and i know he loves me, but he has mood swings. The problem is me. i cheat on him and i dont know why because i dont get nothing out of it excep...
A. 22 January 2006: You are not a sex addict. Sex addicts don't have to be drunk to have meaningless sex. I believe there's deeper cause to why you act this way. I believe low self-esteem plays a huge part in your behavior. You drink yourself into an oblivion so ... (read in full...)
He's 34-I'm 16..he wants to take me out for my birthday...provided I give him my virginity!
Q. i really like this guy i work with he's 34 im 16. he's always flirting with me and has offered to take me out for my birthday as long he can take my virginity. i really want him too, but im worried about what people might say. he makes me feel s...
A. 22 January 2006: This is wrong on so many levels. Darlin' you're 16. He's basically a pediphile. What he has proposed to you is illegal in all 50 states. Have some respect for yourself sweetie, you're worth more than a dinner plate. Save your precious virginity ... (read in full...)
For the sake of my little girl should I try to make a go of it with this ex-drinker, computer game playing, lazy, unemployed, emotionally incompetent and verbally abusive man?
Q. Ok, I am a 22 year old single mother of a beautiful 19 month old girl. I am currently with a man who is 10 years older than me, emotionally incompetent and verbally and emotionally abusive. He used to drink alot and spend 98% of his time playing ...
A. 22 January 2006: Oh sweetie, you are in danger just being with him now. I was a single mother too and had my own ups and downs when I was in relationships. He didn't "weasel" his way back into your lives, YOU allowed him to come back. Don't let him use that ... (read in full...)
My GF likes to give -- but not receive -- oral. I just want to please her like she does me!
Q. My girlfriend who I've been with for six months acts a little strange about oral sex. She has no problem giving it to me, but she won't let me go down on her. She says it's just nasty. I would like to be able to please her the way she does me. What ...
A. 22 January 2006: Hi there! What a kind and caring attentive boyfriend you are!! Ladies hats off to this guy! Ok back to business... Your girlfriend is probably VERY self conscious about how she smells or tastes down south. Maybe she had a past boyfriend who ... (read in full...)
Please help me with my jealousy...
Q. i am 18 and ihave a baby with a man who is 7 years older than me. he i very controlling and im am very jealous due to the way i was raised. i am very insecure about my looks and my attitude. he often puts me down harshly and he is very secret ...
A. 22 January 2006: This might be a time to seriously question whether or not to be with this man. A healthy relationship consists of honesty and trust from both partners. He is not honest and you feel you cannot trust him. I also must comment on his "harshly ... (read in full...)
Does he want me back or has he moved on?
Q. my ex and i have been broken up for almost a year now. He's the one who broke up with me. Since then, he has never expressed a desire to get back together to my face, but has hinted at it. we had a few months away from one another, but have been in ...
A. 22 January 2006: I had a friend kinda like yours. He was always showing interest such as talking to mutual friends about our past relationship and doing all the things you mentioned. But in the long end, he simply wouldn't commit to a relationship again where I ... (read in full...)
We haven't even dated yet... Has he broken up with me already?
Q. Dear Cupid, Last month I met this great guy on match.com, he was everything I wanted and I was everything that he wanted in return. We talked over instant messenger and talked over the phone for hours. We both knew how each other looked liked, so...
A. 20 June 2005: Sounds as if your date is only interested in a one night stand. He was all gung-ho about you and doing the little lovey-dovey things for you. Until he met you. Maybe he had a different mental picture of you in mind. Maybe he was disappointed ... (read in full...)
We've been attracted for 12 years & he lives in another country. What next?
Q. I have a very difficult problem. Twelve years ago I met a man who was a tourist in my country. We liked each other very much but didn't have a relationship. When he left for his country we spoke on the phone and corresponded regularly. Two year...
A. 20 June 2005: Oh dear, I believe you should go ahead and let this one go. He's married for one reason and if he really wanted you, he'd divorce his wife and fly right over to get you. I really feel that you are just a sexual fantasy for him right now. Maybe he ... (read in full...)
My new partner won't tell her kids about us... even after 18 months!
Q. I left my wife after 20yrs of marriage, after 18 months my new partner will still not tell her kids (10 & 14) about us. I am now divorced she is not even legally separated from her ex. She lives in her own apartment and I in mine. I have tried so...
A. 10 June 2005: She is a mother and You knew this getting into the relationship. Who knows children better than their mothers? Who are you to say that 18 months is more than enough time? How can you be so selfish? She's not doing this for herself, but for her ... (read in full...)
A former friend of the family is now my ex-husband's partner and I'm still hurt...
Q. Why does my ex partner not want me to move on with life? He left me and 2 kids for a new partner. Kids refuse to have anything to do with dad's new partner because she used to be a friend of the family. They are happy to see their dad every day, ...
A. 10 June 2005: Your ex-partner wants you to get on with life as he did. You are dwelling on this past and it's not healthy. Time heals a broken heart. Usually I tell people to give themselves space from their exes, but I won't tell you that because you share ... (read in full...)
The communication has stopped and he says he doesn't love me, only "cares for" me...
Q. A couple of weeks ago my partner of 10 years told his daughter to go back to her mother, which she did. He has tried on many occasions to contact her but no luck. The problem now arises that he has gone very quiet and will not talk. He has also tol...
A. 10 June 2005: Your partner is feeling VERY guilty for kicking his daughter out. Now his feelings seemed to have progressed to depression. He feels that way toward you out of anger at himself, or because you had a hand in it, or out of plain depression. Advise ... (read in full...)
Since Mark moved in with my sister and me, things have gone downhill...
Q. Dear Cupid Mark and I have been in a relationship for three years, he moved in with my sister and I three months ago. Since then, our seemingly perfect relationship has gone downhill and I feel like we hardly speak to each other and feel like we...
A. 10 June 2005: You and your sister will need to work out some sort of a schedule where she goes out for the entire night so you and your boyfriend can have some intimate time together so you can re-connect. Take turns on the schedule, when your sister requests ... (read in full...)
We live on different continents, and we've managed to stay faithful, but where do we go from here?
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years, but we've only actually seen each other for 6 months out of those two years. We live on different continents and email all the time and occasionally call. I have to stay in Europe for work, but he ...
A. 10 June 2005: I think you should be asking him all those questions, not me. When you get your answers, you'll know more where you stand and what action to take. You and your boyfriend have to communicate these things no matter how small they seem.... (read in full...)
We're attracted to each other, but she's put up emotional barriers that are hard to overcome!
Q. I am very attracted to a 31 year old female both emotionally and physically. I am a 44 year old female. We have hung out several times together. We have only known each other for 5 months. We have told each other that we are attracted to one ...
A. 10 June 2005: Ask her if there is any possibility that she could change in the next 6 months to a year. If you could prove that she can trust you, would that be enough for her? If not, I don't know what to tell you. I used to be very shut in when it came to my ... (read in full...)
Can I trust him not to betray me again by masturbating to porn?
Q. I recently found out that my boyfriend looked at porn and masturbated. He said he wanted to stop for me because every time he did it he felt like he was betraying me. This has me so worried because if he felt like he was betraying me and couldnt ...
A. 10 June 2005: What is it with women not wanting their men to look at porn? I don't think women understand the physiology of a healthy man. Even if we were in the days of old where T.V. didn't exist, there was still pictures- drawn or painted to look at and jack ... (read in full...)
My g/f has been seeing my best mate, but I only hate him. Why?
Q. Dear Cupid, I'd been dating a fantastic girl for over a year when she dumped me last week. Things have been difficult for a few months as I had a new job and she was in the run-up to her final exams at university. Yesterday I discovered she's...
A. 10 June 2005: You can't get mad at her because you feel guilty. You blame yourself for her leaving. Wake up! You did not put her in your best friend's bed. She did that herself and she went willingly and happily. She made that choice. You did not drive her ... (read in full...)
I'm in Canada and he's in London... and it might be 2 more years before we can meet!
Q. Boyfriend lives in London and I live in Canada. What do I do? But I'm only 16. I just got out of a 3 year relationship and thought I knew what love was until I met this guy. He makes me feel so great inside, but we can't see each other in person, ...
A. 10 June 2005: Let him go. My God! Are we women so hard up for anyone to tell us that we need a man to tell us that we are beautiful and lovable that we would even consider a convicted felon? Honey, you don't need that! Of course, he says he needs you! There ... (read in full...)
Recently, he asked if we could have an open relationship and if he could sleep with our new flatmate...
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 9 months next week and living together for 8 months. Over the last few weeks he has been hot and cold and recently asked if he could sleep with our new flatmate or have an open relationship. I was hurt as ...
A. 10 June 2005: If you don't want to have an open relationship, then don't. You have a say also! Tell him how this request makes you feel. If he can't understand your point of view, I'm sorry, you may have to consider leaving him. Cause if you stay and you ... (read in full...)
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