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female
,
anonymous
writes: what do you do when your husband tells you that you cant go out and if you do, he will leave and take your son? Reply to this Question
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reader, Your big sis +, writes (27 January 2006):
 Your husband is abusing you. Abuse is not an accident. It is an intentional act used to gain control over another person. Be warned these are three of the first signs of domestic abuse. There are 8 paths to an abusive person's power and control. They are: intimidation, isolation, emotional abuse, economic abuse, using male privileges, threats, using children, and blame & denial. Every time a path is added to the heap, it brings the victim closer to physical abuse. It is every person's right to live without fear, abuse, or oppression. Your husband is an abuser and you are a victim. You get help from your local police department and they can refer you to some options at no cost to you. Also, your husband cannot legally "take" your son from you, especially since he is an abuser. Have no fear of that. Your next step is to decide whether or not you will continue being a victim and staying in your present situation. Know that there are good people in your community and churches who you can reach out too. Take care of yourself and your son.
A
reader, Your big sis +, writes (27 January 2006):
Your husband is abusing you. Abuse is not an accident. It is an intentional act used to gain control over another person. Be warned these are three of the first signs of domestic abuse. There are 8 paths to an abusive person's power and control. They are: intimidation, isolation, emotional abuse, economic abuse, using male privileges, threats, using children, and blame & denial. Every time a path is added to the heap, it brings the victim closer to physical abuse. It is every person's right to live without fear, abuse, or oppression. Your husband is an abuser and you are a victim. You get help from your local police department and they can refer you to some options at no cost to you. Also, your husband cannot legally "take" your son from you, especially since he is an abuser. Have no fear of that. Your next step is to decide whether or not you will continue being a victim and staying in your present situation. Know that there are good people in your community and churches who you can reach out too. Take care of yourself and your son.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 January 2006): Your husband obviously seeks to control you and he is using the threat of taking your son to do this.He may threaten that he will leave you and take your son with you, unfortunately for him fortunately for you it is not quite that simple. If you love your husband and want to stay with him then I suggest some sort of marriage counselling to address your husbands control issues, if you do not wish to stay with a man who threatens you and seeks to control your every movement then my advice is to get a solicitor and start both divorce and custody proceedings, whatever you choose to do make it clear to your husband that he will not take your son without a fight and that you will involve police and the courts lets face it you cant just take off with a child life is just not that simple. Good Luck
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