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... Send *oftlyCaress a private message | | | *oftlyCaress's profile:I am a 53 yr old woman who has 3 grown daughters and 7 grand kids . I work full time and very distant from my family seems like no matter what i try i cant please any of my girls which are all grown . I try to not let this bother me and not sure if it is just me or letting anyone get close to me or vise versa but I can tell you I feel alone I like going camping and kayaking and there are times I wish i had someone who enjoyed the same things I do but no luck . I am Married but it has fallen apart because we are so very different filing for a divorce asap . I have lost both my parents and on 1/1/2019 a still born grand daughter not sure how to deal with that or anything else right now I guess Im just grasping at straws I feel as though the past 2 yrs my whole world has been a nightmare and keep wanting to wake up. I know I am not the most beautiful or perfect person but at this time I am so very very lost mentally and emotionally .. Just grasping for my happiness back again ! I WANT TO LIVE LAUGH And LOVE AGAIN !!! |
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All I want is someone to love me! I need some advice!
Q. Here we go, I am going to try and do this without breaking down into tears . I have only been divorced since May of 2012 however my husband left in 2008 I met this man and started seeing him and at the time i didnt know he was married because he ...
A. 14 November 2013: Ok so I come home from work today to find him GONE and all his stuff as well ! Found out he had found some guy on Craigslist that would take him to his house down south and as soon as i left for work he packed all his things and bammmmmmmmmm I ... (read in full...)
All I want is someone to love me! I need some advice!
Q. Here we go, I am going to try and do this without breaking down into tears . I have only been divorced since May of 2012 however my husband left in 2008 I met this man and started seeing him and at the time i didnt know he was married because he ...
A. 11 November 2013: I agree with you all , But it is not in fear of me being alone but him being alone .Its not the fear of not being able to make it either cause i do very well in that department . I want to be happy and I am starting counseling and will take it from ... (read in full...)
Is it truly possible for two people to stay faithful to one another for many years?
Q. Is it truly possible for two people to stay faithful to one another for many years? I'm starting to lose hope! It seems like loads of people are finding their partners cheating on them on line, sexting, etc :( Can anyone be satisfied just by ...
A. 19 July 2012: I might not be the best person to answer this since i just got a divorce after 30 yrs of marriage . I think it is possible for it to happen my parents did till my father passed . i know a lot of people who have however my ex wasnt able to ....... (read in full...)
How can it be love if they need to be drunk to have sex?
Q. Is someone really in love with you when the only time they have sex with you is when they are drunk?...
A. 2 July 2010: I dont think it should be . I am seeing this man that is the same way and I refuse to have sex with him when he is drunk because that is all it is (SEX ) hell a person can get sex anywheres but you cant get love anywheres . I say if that is how he ... (read in full...)
Can I trust him again? He's always showing signs of cheating!
Q. Im a 32 yr old who has been screwed over by every man ive ever been with..when me and my husband now got together i accussed him so much,but he would always say he would show he was different.Well oct.of 08 i found out he was txt a girl from a bank ...
A. 2 May 2010: You will always find it hard to trust him if that is what he has done but if you really want to save your marriage try counseling and it will have to be couple counseling .Im not sure that will even help because a man can say all the things he ... (read in full...)
Smelly green discharge?
Q. hey i have had this kinda clear/greenish discharge for a few days its not itchy or sore but it is a bit smelly i am getting kinda worried and i dunno what to do. i know it cant be an sti cuz i am still a virgin but it is kinda getting to me. ...
A. 1 May 2010: Ok Sounds like you might have a little infection could be yeast of some sort you should really go to the Doctor but if you cant do that then go to any pharmacy and get and over the counter medication and if you ask for help at the counter they will ... (read in full...)
The guy I am seeing wants to engage in incest themed role play!
Q. Sorry, I'm sure you get questions like this all the time... Anyway, I'm 18 and I'm "seeing" a guy who is mid 40's, he is divorced and has no kids and I'm going off to uni soon so it'll be goodbyes in a bit, the other day we were laying in bed and he ...
A. 1 May 2010: I think pretty much the same while it might sound sick to you it is just a fantasy and nothing wrong with that you are not his daughter and I am sure if you was he would not have even suggested it at all So Go ahead step out and enjoy yourself go ... (read in full...)
We've been dating for 4 months, he says he loves both me and his wife and now she's coming back!
Q. Hi there! i have a serious problem here. i met this guy in december 2009, he told me his wife has left him for 14 months, then we started dating, now were are so emotional involved he just told me a week ago that the wife is coming back from ...
A. 1 May 2010: I agree with the two post before me . I would say he is pretty much making it be known that he is in love with his wife so walk away . And even if she isnt coming back to be with him ,He has told you he still loves her so its not good for you to ... (read in full...)
What should be used to shave "down there"?
Q. hey how do u shave down there i mean can i use a guys shaving razor??if not how else can i shave down there(pubic hair)please let me know...
A. 6 April 2009: I use a regular razor and some cream and it works fine all you have to do is just like your legs and under arms and be careful ............ (read in full...)
I'm so used to fighting my paranoia that I can't make head or tail of the situation
Q. I've been dating this girl for about 8 months now. Originally I rebounded from a previous relationship to her, but it couldn't have been a better person to find. We were friends before hand, but here's where things get tricky. She's, more or less, a ...
A. 31 March 2009: I agree with Erin if you dont have the right plumbing you might have all your going to get and that is a good friend .You can love someone and not have anything sexual but as for a relationship if you feel as she is gay then you might want to ... (read in full...)
I really don't mean to be confusing. Any explanations would be very helpful.
Q. Hi, just looking for some ideas and feedback on a situation I am in. First things first, met this girl about a month ago through some friends, got talking and soon after we met up on own... Didn't do much the first time just hung out. Got on well...
A. 31 March 2009: I think maybe you could probably ask her how she liked the date and it wouldnt be confusing .Also you could maybe let her ask you to come over and hang out sometimes this way it would make her feel as if she is kinda in control of where the ... (read in full...)
Should there be an agreement on when to hang out with our own friends?
Q. My boyfriend and I are going our separate ways on Friday night..hanging out with friends that we haven't seen in such a looong time. We do this every now and then. Should there be an agreement between both of us? We've been dating for over (2) ...
A. 31 March 2009: I think its not a bad thing to let each other know you made it home safe but at the same time that is the only time I would call and touch basis. you arent married and you dont own each other it is a good thing to be away from each other they ... (read in full...)
Dazed and confused! I can't advance in my LDR due to family problems.
Q. So, here I am once again, reaching out to my fellow Aunts! I need some magic words that will make everything better, and I know that's unrealistic. Never the less, I need something from you guys! Any suggestions or words of encouragement will be ...
A. 5 March 2009: Just hang in there things will get better and if your bf loves you with his whole heart it will work I out .I would think about going on with everything and as I saw that my mom or dad needed me more I would then either take a leave of absence and ... (read in full...)
We are really nervous. What is the cause of strange symptoms after sex?
Q. So I've had unprotected sex with my girlfriend about 2 weeks ago and i finished inside of her. She has not had sex before that for a while. After that night i had sex with her again but she said when i went all the way inside of her she had pain ...
A. 5 March 2009: She should probably see a dr but this is things that can happen if you have a uti or yeast infections as well as other infections if the pain continues or if you are that worried maybe she should make a appointment and see the dr someones health ... (read in full...)
Is this something she's going through or is it just me should I stay or should I go?
Q. With our first child she wanted sex all the time but with our second child which she had early b/c she had high blood pressure and had 2 have the C section, everything has changed she's always tired she says or the couple of times she did it's like ...
A. 23 February 2009: I think you need to calm down she has been through alot and it might take sometime for her sex drive to pick back up .I wish one time a man could go through what a woman does during pregnancy maybe they would learn some patience .There are ways to ... (read in full...)
In a relationship with a married man and scared of being alone again, help!
Q. Hi I'm 41yrs old,and in a awful mess. Long story short. In a relationship with a man who is married, we weren't suppose to take this any further than just that one time. Now its been 9months. He is the one who plans everything,we have seen each ...
A. 21 February 2009: It is important for your mental state to part from him.I know I went through a deal like this and he would tell me he loved me and all the same bull. That most men will feed you who is married and wants a little extra on the side but if he hasnt ... (read in full...)
Does my husband love me or is it over for him?
Q. I have been married over 8 years my husband works a lot of hours and he is always busy I got sick a while back and I was very week I asked him if he can stay with me that day His answer was I am not a doctor or do you want me to stay and hold yo...
A. 16 February 2009: Sounds like he has other things on his mind like supporting you and the family .Sometimes its hard to just stay home because one is sick (these days anyways ) times are tough and as man supporting a family he probably has allot on his mind .I am ... (read in full...)
I always run back to him although the relationship makes me feel depressed, help!
Q. I am a women over 40 and been dating a guy for 6 yrs. now. If u size it up may be considered 3 yrs.total because of the long distance. I am I feel totally depressed all the time with this relationship. I think he is a BAD HABIT like being addicted ...
A. 16 February 2009: I know what you mean have found myself in that position also .But you have to do what is best for you if you arent happy and the relationship depresses you then it isnt worth your mental health or physical health. It is hard but you have go to let ... (read in full...)
He doesn't want to spend Valentine's Day with me!
Q. Me and my boyfriend have been going out for almost a month now ... but he doesnt want to talk to me on the phone ! I dont get it ? He tells me to hang out on valentines day ... but now hes telling me that hes going to a sweet 16 and that gets me mad ...
A. 13 February 2009: Hey girl do your own thing dont let no guy bring you down you are young and you have your whole life to to live .I am 42 and I am just learning to do the same I refuse to let a man dictate to me how I am going to spend any of my holidays ...I tell ... (read in full...)
G spot questions
Q. would you girls stimulate your man's G spot and would you guys let your girl do it to you? ...
A. 13 February 2009: LOL I Guess To Each his own but i aint going to poke nothing in no mans rump no matter how bad they want it.I think I would take him to the toy store and Buy him a thingy and say hey bub your on your onw................ (read in full...)
I've never had to share my boyfriend before, his little girl makes me mad at times!
Q. my boyfriend and i have been togeather for 4 months now and we both have daughters. Mine 8 and his 5. I love him sooo much but i am jelious of his daughter and his relationship with her.We dont fight about anything but his daughter or his ex. I know ...
A. 13 February 2009: You should look at it this way g/f will come and go but your kids will always be your kids so i suggest to you that you grow up and get mature about the matter she is a baby whom needs her father and you are a grown up .You have to remember when it ... (read in full...)
What do I do if he never mentions Valentine's Day?
Q. I have been dating this guy for about a month and a half and he hasn't mentioned Valentine's Day at all. He is a really nice thoughtful guy, he goes out of his way to do nice little things for me and I have seen him do the same for friends of his. I ...
A. 13 February 2009: You dont worry about it I have been with a man for awhile and he is like that also isnt romantic at all........ (read in full...)
If he's telling the truth why won't he take the lie detector test?
Q. My husband of 10 1/2 years says he didn't cheat on me. However, I don't believe him and want him to take a lie detector test. He said, "I will not take one because of my integrity. And, I know I didn't do anything." So, my question is...if he ...
A. 13 February 2009: I will tell you this if he has nothing to hide he should take it and if he does then he needs to come clean and start a fresh way.As for having numbers and description on people that does massages what the heck does it matter what they look ... (read in full...)
Shouldn't I love him no matter what?
Q. I love my bf, he's a great guy. But sometimes I wish he were better looking. I make him wear a hat all the time cos his hair is awful and he's going bald. But I sometimes feel like that is really messed up. Shouldn't I love him no matter what? But ...
A. 11 February 2009: YES you should love him for who he is not how he looks and if you cant be proud of your man chances are you need to let him go because all you will do is bring down his self esteem.Its not fair..You say he has a great personality then go with that ... (read in full...)
4 years and I'm bored with my boyfriend!
Q. help please, I'm driving myself crazy. i've been with my guy for four years. He made me really happy and i used to believe he was the perfect person for me. However, four years later i'm beginning to doubt us. He's been a perfect gentleman, and a ...
A. 11 February 2009: Ok well I suggest that you start trying to go off on like weekend getaways together maybe one weekend have him plan something romantic it will put the flame back in the relationship... Dont give up on it if you miss him when he isnt with you and ... (read in full...)
I am having a lesbian affair even though I'm not gay. What is wrong with me!
Q. Dear Cupid. I am in a loving relationship with a guy who i am intending to spend the rest of my life with. And i think i am about to start a serious affair with a GIRL from work. I know what i am doing is wrong and immoral and do feel guilty. How...
A. 10 February 2009: I dont think you are a lesbian but it could be that you are bi or just bi curious .I have also went through the same thing and went through with it .I enjoyed it and know what it is about probably wont do it again but at the same time dont know ... (read in full...)
Is it wise to expect a good friendship with my ex so our children could be proud of us?
Q. Seperated for 2 years but not yet divorced. Recently found myself thinking back over the good times and sad for what we could have had. I do not wish to be back in his arms but he was so much part of my life and with grown up children who could be ...
A. 9 February 2009: Are you really wanting to be a friend for you or Just for the kids? I am doing the same thing and my outlook is we have shared 26 yrs together which is to long to let go of friendship so in my case I want to be his friend for the reason that we are ... (read in full...)
Sad and Lost husband
Q. Recently, my wife told me that she want to split with me, reasons being that she does not have the spark and feeling with me anymore and she can untie that knot from me. She told me that the relationship have been detoriated since 8 or 9 years ago ...
A. 9 February 2009: I Went through the same thing pretty much.And the only thing you can do is give her the room she needs maybe she will realize she still loves you in my life that wasnt so i am now without a hubby .You need to think about you and take care of you ... (read in full...)
Should I put up with his moods to prove that I care, or just move on?
Q. I met this totally awesome guy a couple weeks ago. We go out or just hang out at his place. We have so much in common it's crazy. I've never believed in the soul mate thing till I met him. Everything was fine. He told me he was falling in love with ...
A. 9 February 2009: I dont think I would play the game he is playing we deserve better then what they deal us at times there is more fish in the sea and you should dive in and then if he really is in love with you maybe it will jar his brain a little and he will wake ... (read in full...)
I am pregnant and don't know who the dad is? One is white, one is black
Q. I am 4 months pregnant and my boyfriend who thinks he is the dad and is in prison. My midwife worked out my due dates and the baby could have a different father, who is black called W. I slept with them both within a day of each other (as I...
A. 29 January 2009: If you used a condom with W I wouldnt worry about telling your boyfriend just dont do it again . And as long as the condom wasnt broke or leaking or anything you should be safe . if there is a chance of any of that happened you could 1 of 2 ... (read in full...)
French kissing & oral sex
Q. Would you french kiss a girl who engage in oral sex with her ex boyriend 3 years ago? Next question is it true that if you kiss a girl that engage in those things it will come in like you kissing the guy private part?...
A. 21 January 2009: Im sure you have kissed other girls right? Have they all been virgins? Have any of them gave oral sex? Are You Sure? Or have they done it and you know nothing about it ? Anyways Im sure your g/f brushes her teeth and it has been three yrs not 3 ... (read in full...)
Friend seems to think I am gay and is following me around
Q. Hi, well ill get straight to the point, i'm 15 and have a friend (i wouldnt call him a friend but he would probly call me his best friend) who i think may be gay (not that theres anything wrong with that) but he seems to be following me lit...
A. 21 January 2009: Well I think the best thing for you to do is to let him know you are straight and if he is gay also let him know you dont hold it against him at all but there is somethings you just dont like to do and dont like to have done to you.You need to be ... (read in full...)
My g/f hates my ex wife and its almost destroyed our relationship
Q. Hello, I'm a divorced father of three girls. I have known my ex wife for over 18 years. We vowed to stay friends after the divorce for the sake of the kids. We talk on a daily basis about the goings on with our girls. They are in many activiti...
A. 21 January 2009: Well Im in the same place as you but i am the ex wife .Its very cool you and her are still friends you have shared life together and should keep it friends for you and the kids sake. My ex hubby and me are best friends we have shared 26 yrs ... (read in full...)
She doesn't know and I'm ready to go!
Q. ok so im at uni in 1st year and living in student halls. i started to like 1 of my flat mates early on and its grown into more. i mean we always kiss and sleep in each others beds and we have had sex once at the very end of last term. this term ...
A. 15 January 2009: I would ask her what her feelings are and where you all stand . could be Like Gina said and she isnt wanting to have a relationship go serious because of study.If you are wanting more let her know and if you two cant agree on it and feel opposite ... (read in full...)
Eight years ago and I still think of my ex
Q. How can I still have feelings for an ex, when its over 8 years ago? I am currently with someone else, for quite some time, but i often think about the other guy, often think what it would of been like to still be going out with him, i often have ...
A. 15 January 2009: I agree with the other 2 post thus far .Until you resolve what there is that needs ti be resolved then you will never be completely over this other guy and never be happy with anyone else . If you have unresolved feelings or not sure what happened ... (read in full...)
He shagged like a porn star in his affair!
Q. My husband and I have been married for 14 years, with 2 kids. He is 40 I am 37. For a long time (possibly always) our love life has not been right. He is very highly sexed, and would want to make love every day, and several times a day if ...
A. 15 January 2009: I would tell him so long you are better then how he is doing . If he is so happy with the way this other woman is sexing him up then let her have him. Its not worth you feeling like a sex slave . Sex should be awesome but seems he is a nympho ... (read in full...)
I just need other opinions, maybe some good thoughts...
Q. What does it mean when your ex of seven years says "sorry Jade, I can't acccept your facebook friend's request until you go to treatment and better yourself bff (best friends forever) love Jay" but yet he will talk to other girls on facebook that...
A. 15 January 2009: I would ask Him what he meant by it and also at the same time that he probably needs to clean up around his own back door before he starts cleaning yours.. Truly if you are either using drugs you can better yourself by leaving them alone and let ... (read in full...)
How can I turn my life around?
Q. It boils down to this. Every time I meet a woman and see her as a potential partner I discover that she is married or in a relationship. I have had little success in getting any partner in my lifetime. This is compounding my situation because ...
A. 15 January 2009: HMM Well you say the only women you attrack are ugly women and not presentable how so?? A person can be not attractive and be a beautiful person . Seems you are having a hard time cause you only want to look at the outward appearance .I think if ... (read in full...)
Do you think I have done the right thing?
Q. Hi firstly I would like to thank all whom left an answer in relation to my previous questions the last few days. Yesterday when I cuddled her it was like cuddling a dummy. No emotion, no reaction. She said she would like to catch up over the week...
A. 15 January 2009: I think you have done the right thing a relationship cant be a one way thing it has to be 2 way. I know it probably hurts but I feel she has found someone also or is on the prowl and if this is true you are better off without her and moving on ... (read in full...)
And oh, the kids and all the crappy divorce war, I just don't know how to go on...
Q. How long can a marriage hold on? Do most marriages fail? I keep reading over and over again too many miserable stories and mine is on the rocks too, after 25 years. I have an unloving, gloomy husband... No affection. I'm so scared, I feel I should ...
A. 14 January 2009: Sorry about you being unhappy. I am going through the much dreaded Divorce after now 26 years and it is a very scary thing to do when you are used to depending on someone else for finances and everything else but I can tell you if it is as bad as ... (read in full...)
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