A
male
age
,
*idges
writes:It boils down to this. Every time I meet a woman and see her as a potential partner I discover that she is married or in a relationship. I have had little success in getting any partner in my lifetime.This is compounding my situation because whenever I am in a new situation such as a job, or new social gathering, I very soon get found out that there have been no significant others. This raises suspicions as to what is wrong with me.I have tried and tried throughout life to just be myself but this is not good enough for any potential mates and very soon they seem put off.I have had to lie about a relationship recently to a woman at work who asked about my personal life. She too was separated but I don't know whether she wanted to start a relationship. I was able to show a picture of a girl from my teenage years and pass it off as a girlfriend. Otherwise I don't know whether she would have been put off.It's not PC i know but the only women I attract are downright unpresentable, ugly and unattractive to me. I am beginning to despair. How can I turn my life around.My friends who have been divorced and with children seem to fare better. They are respected by women and have no trouble partnering up again. I dont know what to do to improve my situation. I am in my forties - Male.
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female
reader, SoftlyCaress  +, writes (15 January 2009):
 HMM Well you say the only women you attrack are ugly women and not presentable how so?? A person can be not attractive and be a beautiful person . Seems you are having a hard time cause you only want to look at the outward appearance .I think if you step back and look with in these women you so call ugly and not presentable you might just find a beautiful person.As for being attractive to a woman that is married or in a relationship it is very easy to want what another has and that will bring you nothing but heart ache . And if you give these so called ugly women a chance you might just see they are very pretty and you two can become beautiful together and even make these ugly women have better self esteem and both be happy ...
A
male
reader, StudentOfLife  +, writes (15 January 2009):
 Others see in us what we see in ourselves.
If you don't feel attractive, confident etc... how can you expect others to see that you are?
Smiles often make a difference in how others see you. When you smile, it shows that the person to which you smile to makes you happy.
The foundation of a relationship is trust, how do you expect to have one if they can't even trust you from the start? Everybody lie to girls to try to show how "Big" they are compare to others, if you truly want to be "Big" around her, do something that the others don't do ... don't lie.
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