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| | *onelyButNotAlone's profile:I'm just a guy in his mid-twenties who would rather hit someone (and be hit) with the cold hard truth rather than beat around the bushes.
People are too dishonest. If we could all only be a little more honest, half of our troubles would disappear.
I live in Iowa, work for a living and am going to school to become a pharmacist. I like horror movies, video games, biking, drinking, and that sort of thing.
After a year and a half long relationship and a bad break-up (girlfriend cheated on me with a guy she met online, told me she never loved me, I had to move out), only a month later I've started seeing someone else. My new girlfriend and I have been together for a little over a month now. |
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Can I give or receive oral sex without passing on my oral herpes?
Q. if i have oral herpes and i have no outbreaks can someone give me oral sex without me giving it to them?also can i give oral to someone without passing it on if i have no outbreaks at the time?or can i never have oral or give oral ever?...
A. 20 November 2008: but oral herpes only effects a person's mouth and my vagina
is different right?so does that mean that i can't have unprotected sex without passing it either?
No, you can... Actually, you're very unlikely that you'd pass oral herpes through unpr... (read in full...)
I want to break up and have my time of FUN, but what if it's not possible to return to my boyfriend later? Should I take the chance?
Q. So I've been in a relationship with my bf for about a year and a half and I am pretty sure that I want to end up with him. The problem is, I'm only 19 and I feel like I haven't gotten to do a lot of the things I'd like to do. I live with him, so ...
A. 18 November 2008: The fact that you're having these feelings now says that you're not ready to settle down... and not to sound pessimistic, but... if you were to marry him now, you'd likely run into marital strife as a result of your unrealized desires to experience ... (read in full...)
Can I give or receive oral sex without passing on my oral herpes?
Q. if i have oral herpes and i have no outbreaks can someone give me oral sex without me giving it to them?also can i give oral to someone without passing it on if i have no outbreaks at the time?or can i never have oral or give oral ever?...
A. 18 November 2008: You can still pass on herpes, even if you're not having an outbreak.
The herpes virus, like many viruses, will only exhibit "outbreak signs" under times of stress, improper diet, and improper use of the drugs you use to treat the symptoms... (read in full...)
It's hard for me to come onto guys and know if they feel the same...
Q. okay, i want to pursue this guy that i find really attractive. But i don't know if he's attracted to me, so i'm a little hesitant. I'm a shy person, and not very outgoing. I find it hard to come on to guys. So i would like some advice on how to. ...
A. 18 November 2008: If he's shy, you may be hard-pressed to find any real "tell-tale" signs that he fancies you.
Does he seem to try and engage you in idle conversation or small-talk? Does he try to stand near your or close to you when in a group with other people? ... (read in full...)
Must I just be patient?
Q. My phone is temporarily off and I was talking to someone who I care about but when I asked him to come over my house he didn't show up, maybe he was busy but my phone has been off and he does work. I haven't really heard from him but I wonder if I ...
A. 18 November 2008: I'm assuming that when you say your "phone has been off," you mean that you ran out of minutes or were waiting for the month to roll over so you could use it again?
If your phone has been "offline," he might have had to cancel meeting up with you... (read in full...)
I'm really confused by the behavior of a girl I am interested in.
Q. I'm really confused by the behavior of a girl I am interested in. We have hung out a few times during the week but the last few weekends I've called her she never answered or called back. Last week she asked if I wanted to hang out with her but she ...
A. 18 November 2008: She just sounds flighty to me.
Good luck on your night alone with her!... (read in full...)
Do I get out and lose the trust from both of them?
Q. I'm a horrible pathetic person, I really am. I should really have asked this question a few months ago, before I got involved. So, I'm first of all going to ask a question as I would have a asked back then, and then I'm going to ask what to do ...
A. 18 November 2008: I'd say get out now, before things go any further.
You're not in a relationship with this girl for the right reasons and your feelings for her mother probably won't change in any amount of time.
You'll probably lose their trust and respect, but... (read in full...)
My new partner's ex is trying to break me and ruin my life.
Q. I am really struggling. My new partner's ex is trying to break me and ruin my life. They were never married - she fell pregnant when they dated for a few weeks - so they have a child together and share the parenting. But she controls him by ...
A. 18 November 2008: Baby-mama drama... and there's no appeasing a woman like that. She obviously feels like she's been scorned by this man and is out to make his (and your) life a living hell, indefinitely.
You say it's your "new" partner? How long have you been see... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for me to like him, because he is my friends ex?
Q. Ok, I'm in a weird dilema... Me and this girl were good friends. And she had a boyfriend. She graduated last year and me and her boyfriend and our mutual friend started hanging out a lot, since she wasn't at school, her and her boyfriend weren't ...
A. 18 November 2008: All's fair in love and war... but you shouldn't be inconsiderate of your friend's feelings about it.
If your friend and her ex parted on bad terms, you're essentially creating a problem by trying to remain friends with her whilst developi... (read in full...)
I really want to get intimate with him yet he doesn't seem interested at all!
Q. Been dating my bf of almost a year...we moved in together a little over two weeks. I really want to get intimate with him yet he doesn't seem interested. We've tried to get intimate about 4 times but I think he was nervous or something because ...
A. 18 November 2008: Some medications have a way of affecting a person's libido and their general desire for sex... if it's something he's too embarrassed to bring up, he could be taking anti-depressants, hair-loss medications, etc. Or it may be as Campbell said that ... (read in full...)
Problems with maintaining erection, could you give me any tips?
Q. I have a girl that i really like her i have tried having sex with her 4 times but it won't go up i don't know why, i have never experience this problem before its not like i don't like her because she is the finest one i have had and i mean fine, ...
A. 17 November 2008: Could be a number of things.
Could be medical, diet-related, stress-related, drug-related.
Seeing as you haven't had this problem in prior relationships, I would probably recommend seeing a doctor and seeing what he recommends.
I... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has been masturbating to his ex's photos...
Q. I just found out my BF of 2 years has been masterbating to his EX these 2 years. I came out and asked him and since he told me. She has huge boobs...he is a boob guy...I have great boobs 34D but they are not gigantor. I am very hurt about t...
A. 17 November 2008: I think it's pretty disturbing, too.
It's one thing for someone to fantasize over pornography, but in my opinion... fantasizing about an ex-girlfriend or boyfriend is drifting into more hurtful territory.
If it were just about breasts, there a... (read in full...)
Should we cut off all communication- to help us both decide what we want??
Q. My ex and i went on a break after five years and a year of that having been engaged. After 5 months, he met someone and was ready to move on. I was absolutely devastated, went through a debilitating depression and all the stuff that supposedly ...
A. 17 November 2008: Why'd you two decide to split up? Was it his decision, yours, or a mutual decision?
Regardless, it sounds like he's being unfair to you by keeping your emotions on a string while he spends time with someone else.
You're correct in your thinking... (read in full...)
Is it possible to have an allergic reaction to a partner's sperm?
Q. Is it possible to have an allergic reaction to a partner's sperm? I had sex with a male friend. He ended up ejaculating on my stomach. Now I have a mild rash on the same area he let his sperm out on. Is that possible? It's the only cause I can think ...
A. 17 November 2008: Yes, strangely enough... it IS possible to be allergic to your partner's sperm. It's extremely uncommon, but it is possible.
I'd recommend bringing it up with your doctor and seeing what he advises.... (read in full...)
Could my reaction to orgasm be a turn off to a guy?
Q. Hi, my question is kinda embarrassing. I had my first orgasm today and my entire body was just shaking like mad, like I was extremely cold, which I wasn't. Is that normal and if so, would that be a kinda turnoff for a guy when I do eventually have ...
A. 17 November 2008: Nope. Speaking as a guy, that wouldn't turn me off at all. Don't worry about it.... (read in full...)
Do guys like girls with wide hips and small boobs
Q. Do guys like girls with wide hips and small boobs? Because thats how i am. I like me and i wouldnt change anything. But if i get together with a guy...do you think he'll lke my body?...
A. 17 November 2008: Guys like girls with all types of bodies. Some guys might be particular about the things they want, but in general, you shouldn't stress out about it.... (read in full...)
She doesn't love me any more and she's doesn't even feel guilty about her behavior! How do I get revenge?
Q. This is a bit of a lengthy story, but I think the context of it all is important. My girlfriend and I just broke up this last Sunday. We've been living together for over a year and a half and things were great until about 2 months ago... I ha...
A. 27 August 2008: Thanks again.
The reality is that I'm trapped till I find my own place. I don't have any friends that I could impose upon.
I don't really see her during the week because of our work schedules. Maybe I'll spend my weekends at the library. Dro... (read in full...)
She doesn't love me any more and she's doesn't even feel guilty about her behavior! How do I get revenge?
Q. This is a bit of a lengthy story, but I think the context of it all is important. My girlfriend and I just broke up this last Sunday. We've been living together for over a year and a half and things were great until about 2 months ago... I ha...
A. 27 August 2008: Thanks... I've calmed down a bit since I wrote that... I mean, it was literally only hours earlier that this all came together.
I just feel so trampled on... I wanna get out but I feel like I'm trapped there for at least a month or so...
... (read in full...)
He's a virgin, I'm not. How can I make it meaningful for him?
Q. So I've been seeing this guy for a while. I had known him before, but now we are really connected. So we went out last night to chat under the stars, and I ended up finding out he was a virgin. I was shocked but totally cool with it. I'm pretty sure ...
A. 22 August 2008: I think as long as you are understanding that it might be a little strange and surreal for him and give him a little guidance if he's having trouble, everything will be fine.... (read in full...)
Am I still a virgin if I was given oral sex from a female?
Q. Am i still a virgin technically speaking, if i've never had sex but have received oral from a girl when i was 15-16. I wished it was more but that was my last encounter with someone else sexually....
A. 22 August 2008: Technically, no. Oral sex is still sex.... (read in full...)
I think I may be resentful of my boyfriend and his life. Am I selfish?
Q. Hello all- I have a problem. I have realized recently that I think I may be resentful of my boyfriend and his life. I have been dating my guy for almost two years and he's a really great man. But as of lately, I've noticed that he has the life ...
A. 22 August 2008: You're not being selfish at all! If anything, you're quite courageous. At least in my book. It takes a strong will and a good heart to make the kind of sacrifices it sounds like you've made for your parents.
And you shouldn't feel bad for being je... (read in full...)
I'm into animal erotica. Can anyone answer questions on "fish" sex?
Q. Hey, Im kind of new with this.So anyway, Im a 39 year old female, Im overweight, lonley, and I need to get my freak on, Im so used to my 9-5 shifts anyway Laitly Ive been turned on by animal erotica, I had a moment when I was 10 with a dog that Ill ...
A. 22 August 2008: Careful q1605, you don't wanna encourage her to do something just for the halibut. It sounds like what she really needs is a good man that will trout her right.... (read in full...)
My ex left me and has moved on, but I want him back.
Q. my ex left me 2months ago, and he got a new girl friend very soon. After I found out, I tried to confirm with him, he just said not telling me because he doesn't want to hurt me. I know its bullshit! but I still can't help missing him, I tried to ...
A. 22 August 2008: He's got no right to feel angry. He's merely re-directing things on to you because he knows he's being unfair. He's acting extremely immature about all of this. I'm sorry, it must be very frustrating and painful.
You're sure to find someone ... (read in full...)
Why is "I Love You" so scary to say?
Q. There’s a new term of affection out there in case you haven’t noticed. It’s a phrase rooted most likely in some rap song… I would appreciate it if someone could reference the first use if it, I know I am curious about it. Well the term is “Show ...
A. 22 August 2008: You and I must be on the very same wavelength, sir. It was only but a minute ago that I made this post to the forums:
http://www.dearcupid.org/forum/romance/1202
You're spot on with everything you've written. It's very scary to say. It hurts to... (read in full...)
Double whammy...I need advice!
Q. I need help,im almost 16 an my boyfriend is almost 14.We dont go to same school anymore but,we reallyyy like eachother, yet we've been a couple for only a week now.And,he wants to have sex with me badly.I'm not sure if i'm ready an if i am ready,i ...
A. 21 August 2008: If he dumps you merely because you wouldn't sleep with him, he's not worth the time. If he really has strong feelings for you, he'll respect you if you tell him you aren't ready.... (read in full...)
I don't want to hurt his feelings but I do need to tell him he's not relationship potential! How?
Q. Two weeks ago i went on a date with a guy i knew on MSN for one and a half years. I'd blocked him for a year because i was not sure about him, but six months ago i unblocked him and we found we had a lot in common. So we became friendlier, then, i ...
A. 21 August 2008: Just give it to him straight. Say that you had a good time on your dates, but you're just not interested in pursuing a relationship with him. Tell him that you were looking for some sort of "spark" and that you just didn't feel it when you dated. It ... (read in full...)
I came home and found my husband in bed with our doctor! What now?
Q. My name is Christina and I am a 30-year-old woman, my husband is 32, and we've been together for 10 years, married for the last 5 out of those 10 years together. I came home from work one night about a week ago to find him in bed with our GP/doct...
A. 21 August 2008: hlskitten is right. Report the GP to the General Medical Council. They have strict policies against sexual relations between doctors and patients.
http://www.gmc-uk.org/concerns/index.asp... (read in full...)
With my girlfriend for five years, want to marry her, do love her, but total confusion in the relationship, breakdown in communication and other things, need help, whay should I do?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for 5 years now and this year was the year I was going to ask her to marry me, we're both 28. She recently came back from a night out with work and woke me to tell me that she and a guy from work had kissed. We ha...
A. 21 August 2008: It sounds like you've been doing everything you can to make things work. You give her space when she needs it, offer her support when she needs that. It sounds like she knows what she wants... but she's had sort of a "picture of how things ough... (read in full...)
Should I be worried that my bf spent half an hour on the phone with my sister?
Q. ok recently i found out that my boyfriend had called the house asking for me and because i wasnt there my sister answered. When i returned home she told me that she had talked to him on the phone. I later found out it was for half an hour. I asked ...
A. 21 August 2008: Have you noticed this ever happen before?
If this is the only time it's happened, I wouldn't worry about it too much.
If your sister were really trying to steal your boyfriend, I doubt she would have been so upfront about talking with him... (read in full...)
There's no spark with my current guy, but my ex turns me on.
Q. I have a question. I'm in such a hard spot right now. I been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years and we should have broken up after the first week. I don't feel attracted to him anymore because he makes me so upset all the time. He is like a f...
A. 21 August 2008: Seeing your follow-up definitely changes my perspective.
I agree with the other posters. It sounds like you've given this guy way more than enough time and chances.
Getting mad because you give concession to your own child? What a jerk!... (read in full...)
Is it fun to watch a girlfriend have sex with another guy?
Q. im thinking about asking my girlfriend to have sex with another guy while i watch. is this fun?...
A. 21 August 2008: Depends on who you are. It's not uncommon anyways.... (read in full...)
There's no spark with my current guy, but my ex turns me on.
Q. I have a question. I'm in such a hard spot right now. I been with my boyfriend for almost 3 years and we should have broken up after the first week. I don't feel attracted to him anymore because he makes me so upset all the time. He is like a f...
A. 21 August 2008: Have you tried talking with him about it? He might not realize that his "antics" are bothering you to the extent that they are. If you've been together for 3 years, I think you at least should try to work things out.
Pretty much everyone on this ... (read in full...)
I want to be a boy toy!
Q. I've dreamed about a mature older women taking me in as her boy toy for, like, forever. She doesn't have to be rich, per se, but I want her to wear the pants. (I find being dominated totatally sexy) How can I find a woman like this and signal ...
A. 21 August 2008: Looking for a cougar, huh?
I would suggest online personal ads or see if you can find a meat-market kind of club near you that features a slightly older group.... (read in full...)
My ex left me and has moved on, but I want him back.
Q. my ex left me 2months ago, and he got a new girl friend very soon. After I found out, I tried to confirm with him, he just said not telling me because he doesn't want to hurt me. I know its bullshit! but I still can't help missing him, I tried to ...
A. 21 August 2008: If he hooked up with someone very quickly after breaking up with you, there's a possibility that he may have been seeing (or at least speaking) with that person before the break-up.
I'm sure that he still cares about you, but his comments about "w... (read in full...)
Does anyone have any ideas as to how to manage time effectively, combat stress and balance out my studies at school?
Q. Lately school has been getting really tough. It's my last year of high school and I'm trying to do my best to get accepted into a good college, but my grades are slowly slipping down because of all the stress. What are some ways to find time to ...
A. 21 August 2008: Schedule time for studying and stick to the schedule you make. Give yourself a set number of hours MINIMUM that you have to study each week and stick to it.
Also, you'll feel less stressed if you study and work on assignments a little bit each day... (read in full...)
My boyfriend and I agreed to a break, to meet new people, he got angry when I talked to a guy, I am confused, please help?
Q. my boyfriend and i are on a break for 2 weeks now and he said no one can get mad if we meet new people. but he overreacted when i started talking to this guy? that i just met. he said he doesnt want to worry when hes in college. does that mean he ...
A. 21 August 2008: It sounds like he really didn't want to break up, but he's likely hoping that some time apart will strengthen your relationship in the end.
He views your talking with another guy as a threat to that possibility.... (read in full...)
I feel sad. Am I depressed?
Q. huhh latley i have been sad and not been able to sleep or not wanting to eat and well sad am i depressed oh yea for a really long time i feel llike im goiing to cry but hold it in so like am i? cuz school is soon to start and i dont wanna be sad...
A. 21 August 2008: You could be depressed. Is there anything in particular that's bothering you?
Even if there isn't, you could be clinically depressed. The chemicals in your brain might be causing you to feel down on yourself, unhappy, and fearful.
You should tr... (read in full...)
I was with a man I truly cared for, but he was verbally abusive, we split up, now my confidence level is basically non-existence, I need advice on how to recover from the damage done to my pysche?
Q. Hi, I came on here before and got some good balanced advice which was really helpful so I've come back again to ask about a problem. I feel really stuck ... in February my partner of 5 years walked out on me whilst I was unwell (it since transp...
A. 21 August 2008: I'm sorry to hear about the way this man treated you. No one deserves to be treated that way, especially by a loved one. You sound like a very smart and lovely woman.
I think that you should take a little more time to relax and not worry too much... (read in full...)
My boyfriend prefers porn to sex with me
Q. My boyfriend (24) and I (22) have been together for almost 2 years. I have never liked the fact that he looks at porn and he has cut back for me. Which I really appreciate. But lately I have been begging for sex and he's constantly turning me ...
A. 21 August 2008: This is definitely not typically the case, I'll admit.
For why he might prefer porn... it's quick, it's easy, it's convenient, he doesn't have to worry about satisfying anyone but himself and it allows him to satisfy any type of fantasy, no matte... (read in full...)
I want to get in contact with my ex! How do I go about doing it?
Q. Hey, I want to get in touch with my ex-bf. Bad idea or not, I'm going to do it anyway so I'd like advice to make it go as smoothly as possible. We broke up in June. I'm not gonna talk about getting back together or what happened, I just REALLY wa...
A. 20 August 2008: Bad terms, huh? In that case, I'd probably recommend something along the lines of returning the book, like you suggested.
I wouldn't recommend saying you wanna meet up because "you need something." He might think that you merely intend to just use... (read in full...)
I want to get in contact with my ex! How do I go about doing it?
Q. Hey, I want to get in touch with my ex-bf. Bad idea or not, I'm going to do it anyway so I'd like advice to make it go as smoothly as possible. We broke up in June. I'm not gonna talk about getting back together or what happened, I just REALLY wa...
A. 20 August 2008: It depends on what kind of terms you parted on. Assuming they were good, I think any of those excuses are fine.
But... he's still likely to see you contacting him out of the blue as a sign you want to get back together.... (read in full...)
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