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... Send *eenthere a private message | | | *eenthere's profile:Hi. I am 25. I am mum to 2 boys. I've been through a lot of things someone my age shouldn't have been through and certainly not as often. I use the name "beenthere" because, when answering relationship q's, I usually have been there or somewhere similar!
I am currently a full time mum to my boys and my 30 year old fiance!:)
The url there is the link to my poetry blog. Appreciate comments from anyone interested! |
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My partner seems to think that just going to work is enough of a contribution to his family...
Q. My relationship is in serious need of repair but I just can't seem to find any way of beginning. My partner is more attracted to the computer than me. I am full time mum and housewife. My partner behaves like a teenager, believes he shouldn't have ...
A. 31 March 2006: Well I've told him again that I feel he replaced me with the computer and that I feel rejected with that and with him going out all the time. He doesn't seem to have taken any notice. He still doesn't see why he should do anything in the house ... (read in full...)
We argue and spat over the way we got together. Should we ignore that, if all the rest is good?
Q. Me and my gf have been together for about 9 months and are having some problems. I would say our relationship is about 90% good, but there are a few things that keep coming up in arguments and are starting to sour the whole deal. The biggest of...
A. 22 February 2006: if it has no bearing on the relationship and the rest of the relationship is good then you should just try not to talk about these issues. i was with someone else when i got with my current bf and he gets jealous thinking i want to get back with my ... (read in full...)
We still care for each other, I know it. Will we ever get back together?
Q. Heya all....... well here I am 3-4 weeks on and I still ain't got her back and beginning to wonder if I ever will or if I should just walk now for good? Sometimes I wish I could but I can't; I love her too much and I still know deep down she has ...
A. 22 February 2006: try a bit harder. does she know you love her and want her back? if she doesn't, you might miss your chance. she might just be killing time wit h this other guy or has given up waiting for you.... (read in full...)
He gets too nervous to talk to me and I don't kow if I should just end it!
Q. I have been going out with this guy for about 7 months, I really like him. I think he is my first love. The only thing is we never talk in person; he gets too nervous. We hang around with the same friends but we never talk. I can talk to him by ...
A. 22 February 2006: that's a good question. and if i had a perfect answer i wouldn't have found this site! first of all i don't think there is any need to break up with him. i live with my guy but we still talk more via text and stuff than face to face! have you tried ... (read in full...)
My BF's cousin tricked me into thinking he wanted to kiss me. I'm thinking I should pretend to be someone else too...
Q. Hi, I'm 12 and I have a bit of a problem on my hands. You see last night I was texting my boyfriend on my cell. He wanted to know when were going to kiss. I practically jumped because he was way off topic all of a sudden. Anyhow I asked him 'when ...
A. 22 February 2006: yes it would be weird but when i was a bit younger, probably a couple of years older than you are now, i had a boyfriend who i thought didn't want to kiss me. so i asked him and he did kiss me! it might work. it might also be that he just wants to ... (read in full...)
I fancy him and he asked me out. Then at school he denied it. What's going on?
Q. Here's the problem: Last night I told the guy I fancy I liked him over Yahoo and he finally asked me to go out with him :D Then today in school he totally dissed me, and my mate said to him "I heard you were going out with Manda. I think that's g...
A. 22 February 2006: yes he is being immature. any guy who really wants to go out with you would not be behaving like this. i don't know why he has done it but just forget about him because he is not worth your time.... (read in full...)
I'm worried about when I start my period...
Q. My mum is really great and has told me all about sex and periods and everything, but I still cringe when she talks about it to me. I'm worried that when I start my period, I will be too shy to tell my mum about it, and what if I start at school? I...
A. 22 February 2006: yes you can use a pad forever. yes tampons can get stuck. whichever is most comfortable for you is the best. i personally have always used pads and don't like the idea of tampons but some people prefer them for several reasons. i think if you have ... (read in full...)
Am I overreacting to his phone call with his ex?
Q. Hi, a week or so ago my boyfriend's ex rang him to find out how his interview went... when she rang he left the room to talk to her and an argument ensued. When he came back into the room I asked if he was ok and he responded saying "Nothing, it's ...
A. 22 February 2006: I don't think it is anything for you to worry about. you are probably right in that he didn't want to hurt you. If he argues with her when he speaks to her then it might just be that he didn't want to talk about it.... (read in full...)
I hate feeling like I have to compete with my boyfriend's 6-year-old daughter
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for a little over a year. He has a 6 year old daughter that I seem to get jealous over. I feel really bad when I start feeling like that, I don't know what to do. I hate the idea of being second in his life, even tho...
A. 22 February 2006: i think this is quite common. I have a 6 year old from a previous relationship. I now live with someone else who i have a child with. I know he cares about my 6 year old but has told me that it hurts that he's not his and i understand that, just as ... (read in full...)
I like this guy and he knows how I feel but still he does nothing!!
Q. I've liked this guy for a couple months now and ive told him how ive felt but he still doesn't do anything. When we are together he'll be flirting with me the whole time.. why hasnt he done anything knowing my feelings for him?...
A. 20 February 2006: make the first move then! simple as that!... (read in full...)
I moved to the States to be with him but when I got there he was distant and broke it off. Now I found out he had somebody else and am hurt. Am i being too hard on him?
Q. Hi, I would really appreciate help. I have written before and been greateful for some good advice, now my situation has changed somewhat... I moved to the States to be with a guy. Before I moved here we never discussed whether we were dating excl...
A. 20 February 2006: i think you should give him a second chance. he probably did just freak out because you went straight from being in an open relationship in different countries to living together and expecting to be exclusive. try to build things up again and do ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is driving me crazy!!
Q. My boyfriend is driving me crazy! He has recently moved into my home...not even settled yet. He wants to hang out with his friends..but they seem to be all women. I have no problem with the ones that are mutual friends who are not afraid to call ...
A. 20 February 2006: you had good reason to question him but i wonder HOW you did it? if you just had a go at him without letting him speak then ofcourse he will go mad at you. this friend might have just made it up, heard rumours, etc. and your bf was angry because you ... (read in full...)
I punched him. Was that the last straw for our relationship?
Q. I have been with my boyfriend for 5 beautiful years, the first 2 of which was long distance, and we had been best friends 5 years previous to that. I have had difficulites with my insecurities and have often caused arguments in relation to them. ...
A. 20 February 2006: you are probably right. the "hole" is most likely to be a feeling that he does love you and want to be with you but can't cope with your insecurities. you both need to sort out your individual problems then, if you both still want to be together ... (read in full...)
Pretty sure my ex thinks he's gay. Do I tell him I know?
Q. Basically, i have recently (about 2 months ago) found out that my ex boyfriend and close friend who I am still very much in love with thinks he may be gay. He doesn't know that I know (no one else does either). I found his page on one of those ...
A. 20 February 2006: it is a bit awkward. maybe if you see a guy you think is attractive, you could mention it and see his reaction. but really you should leave it up to him to tell you when he is ready. he might not be sure himself. don't force the subject.... (read in full...)
Can I get my BF interested in sex toys?
Q. I am into using sex toys but my boyfriend is not. How can I get him into using them? ...
A. 20 February 2006: if you have a good sex life anyway then tell him you want to use the toys to spice things up a bit. maybe give him a demo ;) he might succumb to the idea. but some men just don't like them anyway. just like some women don't like certain things. let ... (read in full...)
I was just about to talk to him about going out when he announced to a group of friends that he's "too busy" for a girlfriend...
Q. Okay - here is my issue. I really like this friend of mine, James. I have for years but for various reasons have never acted on it, partly is that he was a few years older. I wanted to make sure that I really had feelings for him before I acted, ...
A. 20 February 2006: you could ask him anyway. i have known guys who say they are too busy for a girlfriend but then they find someone like 5 minutes after they've said it. providing you understand that he is busy at work and may not have loads of time for you, it can ... (read in full...)
When times were tough I bought everything. Now that he's solvent again, I still have to pay all the bills, or risk his wroth!
Q. Dear Cupid, My fiance changed careers about 2 years ago. He wasn't making enough money so I had to pick up the slack. I started buying all of the groceries, household supplies, even had to pay rent for him a few times. Well, 2+ years later, he is ma...
A. 20 February 2006: yes he is taking advantage. if he really needed help to pay for things then he wouldn't have a problem letting you know how much he earns. i thought my partner was unfair expecting me to pay most of the bills, etc. because he has twice as much money ... (read in full...)
Will I ever find someone who loves me for who I am?
Q. Hi, I'm a 21 year old girl who is all around pretty average, but very quirky. Most people think it's funny that I'm a little "out there" (think Phoebe from FRIENDS) but I feel like I'm never going to get a guy to fall deeply in love with me. Not to ...
A. 20 February 2006: i'm sure there are a lot of guys out there who would love you for who you are. i know it's hard if you are scared to get close but you will no doubt meet guys who are interested in you. people meet their life partners at different times of life. i ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend can't let go of the idea of my ex, and it's driving us apart!
Q. I'm a simple, average girl who has my Mr. Right, but now my relationship with him fell apart because of my ex. He kept insulting me about my past whenever he saw my ex, but the thing is, he knows that I love him so much and he knows that I hate my ...
A. 20 February 2006: without knowing any more this is a tricky question to answer but i have a feeling that your bf is a little insecure and may be concerned. he might see your ex as being better than him in some way and wants your confirmation that he isn't. i know ... (read in full...)
My family say I should be grateful for any girlfriend at all, but this situation doesn't feel fair to me...
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for 1.5 years. She is the first I have been with, while I am her 6th. I could have got over this but she kept on going to her ex's house at least 2 times a week to cook him dinner and watch movies with him...
A. 20 February 2006: no you are not being unfair. no one should be told what your friends and family are telling you. assuming you don't beat her up or exploit her or anything like that then ofcourse you deserve better. sometimes people stay friends with their ex and it ... (read in full...)
He snores but blames me!!
Q. Okay, my boyfriend snores-most nights-and it makes it impossible to sleep with him every night (although I try). Last night he told me that he was annoyed that I slept on the sofa, that when he woke up I wasn't there. I told him that it is because ...
A. 20 February 2006: yes he is being pretty selfish. does he know he snores? because some men don't realise. my partner snores when he has been drinking a lot so you could see if he is willing to cut down a little. that will help. i snore all the time and sometimes wake ... (read in full...)
Is this post-natal depression, or something else?
Q. This isn't really about relationships as such. I think I may be suffering from post natal depression. Are there any signs I should be looking out for? I got really bad baby blues when my baby was 4 days old. I wanted my partner with me but he was ...
A. 15 February 2006: no i wasn't offended at all. i came here for advice and that's what you have given. how can i be offended by that?... (read in full...)
Is this post-natal depression, or something else?
Q. This isn't really about relationships as such. I think I may be suffering from post natal depression. Are there any signs I should be looking out for? I got really bad baby blues when my baby was 4 days old. I wanted my partner with me but he was ...
A. 15 February 2006: i also feel that the other medicines you refer to have pros which outweigh the cons. from personal experiences, i can not see this with anti-ds.... (read in full...)
Is this post-natal depression, or something else?
Q. This isn't really about relationships as such. I think I may be suffering from post natal depression. Are there any signs I should be looking out for? I got really bad baby blues when my baby was 4 days old. I wanted my partner with me but he was ...
A. 15 February 2006: i didn't get this information from the media. i have worries because of the affects i have seen in my father and my best friend. my best friend tried to commit suicide several times while on anti-ds and my father also became much worse. also, i have ... (read in full...)
Is this post-natal depression, or something else?
Q. This isn't really about relationships as such. I think I may be suffering from post natal depression. Are there any signs I should be looking out for? I got really bad baby blues when my baby was 4 days old. I wanted my partner with me but he was ...
A. 13 February 2006: thankyou. i will try to speak to my HV about it. I am slightly worried about going on anti-ds though as i have seen some of the worst affects they can have. i have heard that st.johns wort is a good natural remedy. i'll find out about it nut just ... (read in full...)
Do spells work?
Q. Does anyone think spells actually work? I mean like voodoo or witches spells? Just curious....
A. 11 February 2006: i think spells can work but only if people believe in them. they work BECAUSE you believe in them. there are plenty of books/websites where you can find one. i subscribe to a magazine called mind, body, spirit. there are spells in there. make sure ... (read in full...)
I need some ways to ask her out and make her want me!
Q. I've been wanting to get this girl for a long time. Any tips on how to ask her out and make her want me more?...
A. 11 February 2006: Is she already a friend?Try just talking to her. Flirt wit hher if you can. Get t oknow her a bit better. You might feel more comfortable asking her out if you do this first. Or she might ask you!... (read in full...)
My boyfriend seems to spend more time flirting with his ex than with me!
Q. Hiya I'm in a difficult situation. I'm in a relationship with a boy called Kieran and he is still close mates with his ex girlfriend Gemma. He is always around her and they act more like a couple than close friends. Me and Kieran are close out of...
A. 11 February 2006: I'm guessing you are a young teenager. In which case being confused about boys in general is perfectly normal. Personally I think you should dump Kieran and, if you like him too, ask Matty to go out with you.... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm going to wet myself
Q. I know this may sound strange but anyway; I am a 21year old girl only recently had my first boyfriend. When we start to mess around in bed I get aroused, but then just as he is about to enter me I feel like I am gonna wet myself. Im scared this will ...
A. 11 February 2006: hi. i sometimes get that feeling. if i'm about to be intimate, i usually nip to the loo just before, and after as well! but then, i have had 2 kids. just to reassure you though. even though i have had 2 kids i have never actually "wee'd" during ... (read in full...)
Can't bear to watch my good female friend dating other guys (and her ex!), when I still fancy her!
Q. This girl took an interest in me a few months ago. After getting to know her for a while, we went out a few times, and then I told her I fancied her. At the same time, her ex, who mucked her around last time they went out, told her he had feelings...
A. 11 February 2006: she might just be waiting for you to tell her that although i see where she is coming from with not wanting to destroy a good friendship. seems to me that she is confused. tell her how you feel and that you don't want to ruin the friendship. then ... (read in full...)
My cheating wife kicked me out, and moved her boyfriend into our house! Now she says she's finished with him...
Q. Hi, my name is Adam. I got married 7 years ago. We met throught her parents. Within two months we decide to get married. After one year, our daughter was born. She loves me more then her mum. After the birth, my wife started taking A-class d...
A. 11 February 2006: you don't say hwo old your daughter is. she may be able to choose which parent she wants to be with. i understand that you love your wife but after all she has done, i fear she is simply using you. keep in mind that SHE left you and that she went ... (read in full...)
Is this post-natal depression, or something else?
Q. This isn't really about relationships as such. I think I may be suffering from post natal depression. Are there any signs I should be looking out for? I got really bad baby blues when my baby was 4 days old. I wanted my partner with me but he was ...
A. 11 February 2006: thanx "i no how you feel". i have thought a few times about committing suicide. thank goodness for the love of my kids or i wouldn't be here! i have already self harmed. my partner and his mum asked how i had got the massive cuts on the back of my ... (read in full...)
Is this post-natal depression, or something else?
Q. This isn't really about relationships as such. I think I may be suffering from post natal depression. Are there any signs I should be looking out for? I got really bad baby blues when my baby was 4 days old. I wanted my partner with me but he was ...
A. 11 February 2006: thankyou willywombat. that is kind of how i have been feeling but difficult for me to put into words. i have often felt like i just want to walk away, leave everything behind. i feel like this even when my baby is perfectly ok. happy and not crying, ... (read in full...)
She's my flatmate and I'm falling for her-but she has a bf! What should I do?
Q. My flatmate and I have been living together for almost 3 years and spend a lot of time in each others company, but recently I have started developing feelings for her. Problem is (yep you guessed it!) she has a boyfriend. She has been dating this ...
A. 11 February 2006: sounds t ome like she is confused. she is having problems wit her long term relationship and needs a shoulder to cry on. that's you. i'm not saying she's using you. she probably just feels she can be this way with you. it's not surprising that you ... (read in full...)
We've been dating 10 years-there are communication issues. What should we do?
Q. - we've been together for 10yrs - we do not want to get married as on both our sides our parents have gone through 3 marriages - there is no longer any communication besides for the norm, hello etc - we love each other - have discussed have a b...
A. 11 February 2006: i think i know where you're coming from here. i've been with my bf for about 2 years and there is already a complete lack of communication! commitment doesn't have to mean getting married. you love each other and want to have a baby together. i'd ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend's best friend triggers a reaction in me that I don't understand
Q. me and my boyfriend have been together for about three years, i am really truely in love with him, but something has been making me really uneasy. When ever his best friend is around me he acts really weird,my boyfriend has noticed this as well. But ...
A. 11 February 2006: it is quite common to think you are falling for your bfs best mate. it doesn't always mean what you think it does. often best mates have a lot in common. it could be just that he is showing you the things you see in your boyfriend but you notice it ... (read in full...)
I get irritated when he wants to hug me...am I changing my mind about the relationship?
Q. I just got attached for about 4 months and I am starting to feel that I want to have some time to myself. And I sometimes feel irritated if he comes to my room and just want to hug me. I'm not sure if I am starting to change my mind about the ...
A. 11 February 2006: you may just be feeling the strain of study if you have just come back to it. had you been spending a lot of time with him before? that can be nice at the start but then you feel you don't need that any more. it doesn't necessarily mean that your ... (read in full...)
We are both committed to others...yet there is this attraction
Q. I'm 35 and married for 8 years and have been working in a local factory for a little over a year. I have been working with the same lady (age 42)and we have become very close friends. She is in a 6+ year relationship. Over the past year our ...
A. 11 February 2006: if you love your wife then you shouldn't let anything happen. if you don't feel guilty about the situation then there is probably nothing to feel guilty about. i have a really good male friend who i sometimes feel closer to than i do to my other ... (read in full...)
How can I be what he really wants and become something he has always dreamed of?
Q. Need advice from both male and female. I have got back with my boyfriend. I really really love him and want to really make him want me. He says that he does now, but i really want to shock him and become something he has always dreamed of. I want to ...
A. 9 February 2006: you shouldn't need to change yourself for any man(well obviously there are some exceptions like if you're actually doing something wrong. smeedle is right. he's with you. he should be with you because you are who he wants not because you could be ... (read in full...)
I have a crush on Sis's best friend, but I can't tell her!
Q. I really like my sister's best friend. I have kept this secret for 3 years. Every time she is round, I just want to kiss and tell her, but I can't. Please help me....
A. 6 February 2006: if you've felt that way for 3 years then it's time to do something about it! i got together with my bf when i was 23. he'd fancied me since i was 16 but always thought i was too young for him! are you close to your sis? maybe you could see how she ... (read in full...)
My partner seems to think that just going to work is enough of a contribution to his family...
Q. My relationship is in serious need of repair but I just can't seem to find any way of beginning. My partner is more attracted to the computer than me. I am full time mum and housewife. My partner behaves like a teenager, believes he shouldn't have ...
A. 31 January 2006: our family wasn't really planned but i had a child already and my partner was willing to be a family with us. i have given him every chance to be as involved as he wants to be. he has started trying but he only wants to do "man" things. for example. ... (read in full...)
My partner seems to think that just going to work is enough of a contribution to his family...
Q. My relationship is in serious need of repair but I just can't seem to find any way of beginning. My partner is more attracted to the computer than me. I am full time mum and housewife. My partner behaves like a teenager, believes he shouldn't have ...
A. 31 January 2006: hey. just a quick update. i think, although i am not sure, that my partner has finally realised there are problems and that he needs to do something. he seems to be making an effort to improve the relationship. he still goes straight to the ... (read in full...)
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