I'm conflicted. Since I'm a virgin is it unreasonable to want to find a girl who is a virgin to date?
Q. I don't really know how to approach this topic eloquently, so here's it in a nutshell: I'm extremely conflicted right now about sex. I'm 22 years old and have never had a girlfriend, and am still a virgin (obviously). I've never even kissed a gi...
A. 26 April 2013: Given that you are a virgin then no, it is not unreasonable, despiste people thinking that is stupid or unrealistic, that is irrelevant, because that has nothing to do with the fact than the only way for you to be unreasonable is if you didnt held ... (read in full...)
I'm confused...am I a virgin or not?
Q. I was in a relationship 1year back but that guy ditched me very badly. We once tried to have sex. That time he didnt enter me compltely but I was having some pain when he started entring me therefore I ask him to stop and remove from inside me. ...
A. 20 March 2013: No, you are not a virgin... (read in full...)
My girlfriend lost her virginity at 16 and it makes me extremely jealous of her
Q. I've been going out with my girlfriend for months now, she is my first proper girlfriend and the first person I have sex with, I am 22 and she is 20 , she lost her virginity at 16 and it makes me extremely jealous of her , I cant stop picturing her ...
A. 25 January 2013: I Will add even one more option to those of yos and serpico:
Take a break and go experiment with other girls, once you get a past too you Will be able to relate more to girls who also have a past, Either that or just look for girls who have sex... (read in full...)
A virgin dating a player. I'm scared about having sex with him!
Q. Hey everyone, I'm dating a well known business man of my city,and even before I knew him I'd read about how he's a player and is not really looking for a relationship,I never ever thought for the life of me I'd date him some day!so when I got into...
A. 25 January 2013: dont be naive girl, if he is a player AND you know he is a player, then why are you in this relationship?, dont be silly, people dont change that easily and they will rarely change themselves for someone else. as chigirl said your skills in bed are ... (read in full...)
Why is there such a double standard regarding men's and women's sexuality?
Q. Hi, I am openly dating. And my brother seems to think that I am a potential hoe even though I do not have sex with these men. He's young and is influenced heavily by society and the media and the defintion of what a woman is "supposed" to normally ...
A. 2 December 2012: i agree with cerberus and male anon, feminism is more about giving men a hard time than making them equal, they asume that men have it so easy when it comes to discrimination in the sense that they think men aren't discriminated like women are. in a ... (read in full...)
Why is there such a double standard regarding men's and women's sexuality?
Q. Hi, I am openly dating. And my brother seems to think that I am a potential hoe even though I do not have sex with these men. He's young and is influenced heavily by society and the media and the defintion of what a woman is "supposed" to normally ...
A. 1 December 2012: Cerberus hit the nail in the head, I couldn't have said it better myself ... (read in full...)
Does her sexual past matter? Would I prefer this new friend over my GF just because of my Gf's sexual past?
Q. I have never been the jealous type and I am not sure I would define what I feel as jealousy. My new girlfriend sexual past is really affecting me. I have had quite a few girlfriends in my life and never felt anything like this before. Not even c...
A. 24 August 2012: couldnt have said it better than the last anon answer... (read in full...)
Is it me or is my boyfriend using my past as an excuse to break up with me?
Q. I have been seeing this guy for well over a year now. We attended high school together but didn't really know one another. We have a mutual friend 'Jeff' that I slept with one time almost 20 years ago after we all graduated from high school. I did ...
A. 13 August 2012: you said that he recently asked you if you slept with jeff, then i dont see how he had the power from day one to say no if he only knew recently, and then there is the fact that when he asked you long ago if you had slept with someone of your social ... (read in full...)
My wife cheated on me and is now worried that I'm cheating on her. Its causing a great deal of stress in our home
Q. I had recently discovered that my wife of 12 years was having an affair for past one year. I confronted her with the evidence I had and she admitted it. She has promised to end the affair, which I presume she did, and work on marriage. I do not ...
A. 15 July 2012: i reccomend that you divorce her. she destroyed your trust in her, and even if you can work on that you will never trust her fully again, and you shouldnt, because if she was unfaithful to you once, what makes you think she wouldnt do it again?, ... (read in full...)
I want to lose my virginity before I turn 22 in a month's time, but I do not want my first time to be horrible.
Q. Growing up I was taught to respect women, and to never use them. As I finally turned twenty one last year I realized something very sad, that I'm the last of a kind. The 21st century dating world is very different from what I was taught to live in. ...
A. 12 July 2012: i agree with you, while for most people this does not sem like a real problem, it is obviously a problem for you, and is your situation, so i suggest to just do what will make YOU feel better, and if that mean to go and lose your virginity by any ... (read in full...)
Lost virginity to two Malaysian hookers. Should I feel bad?
Q. I am in the navy and am 21 years old. When i was in Malaysia a couple years back, me and my friends were partying at a club in downtown Kuala Lumpur. We were all drinking and getting pretty drunk. Then late into the night, the club started to ...
A. 23 June 2012: people say that most women wont like you for that, but when a man doesnt like something about the sexual past of a woman, everyone will quickly come preaching you with ''the past doesnt matter and only what you both do in the future'', ok then, dont ... (read in full...)
Can't deal with your lover's sexual past? Why not leave her / him if they have different morals to you?
Q. Hi guys AND girls, I've read a lot on DC about retroactive jealousy, or "his / her sexual past", and people having problems with it. Some very smart people here have made some very good suggestions on how to deal with it. The thing is, that i...
A. 30 May 2012: a lot of people dont like their partners sexual past, is just that most of them have learned to keep quiet about it because of this very same issue: because people think that this is a mental dissorder. people who do care about their partners past ... (read in full...)
My wife has changed, she's become so cold hearted and to make it worse I find out she's lied about her sexual past! Am I crazy or should I feel hurt?
Q. Please anyone give me advise ...I'm hurting more than I ever have in my life, so here's my story I'm 30 years old married 5 years and together 6 years. we have 3 kids two she had from a former marriage but the dad was a deadbeat, thug, gangster in ...
A. 19 April 2012: if you really are miserable because of this, and she has treated you horrible as you say, then you should end this relationship, this kinds of problems continue because people let them continue, they force themselves to try and suck it up in false ... (read in full...)
My wife has changed, she's become so cold hearted and to make it worse I find out she's lied about her sexual past! Am I crazy or should I feel hurt?
Q. Please anyone give me advise ...I'm hurting more than I ever have in my life, so here's my story I'm 30 years old married 5 years and together 6 years. we have 3 kids two she had from a former marriage but the dad was a deadbeat, thug, gangster in ...
A. 19 April 2012: I agree with male anon. The responsibility is on her, those were her decitions and is now her issue to deal how those choices reflect the kind of Person she is, is not fair that you are the one who should deal with the pain that her past brings, ... (read in full...)
I want to put more effort into repairing our friendship
Q. My bestfriend is a girl Cassidy, and my other friend Martha said you've been helpful on her friend problems so I'd be grateful if you can help me. Cass is 16 and I'm 17. We've been having problems because I don't put a lot of effort in and i ...
A. 30 March 2012: o, this is really not as hard as it seems, is just as simple as doing things you both enjoy while also enjoying each other company, you know, enjoy to hang out together. if you want to try to compensate her, then take the inniciative, invite her ... (read in full...)
There was never any intimacy when we were dating, but now she's changed her mind
Q. Hi everyone! So, in my final year at school about 5 years ago, I'd never dated anyone, dating never really interested me at the time. Then I met the most beautiful girl. She asked me out. She was REALLY shy, almost to the point of awkwardness, but...
A. 30 March 2012: well, that depends entirely if you and her are willing to be in a relationship, i guess she would like it, because she is letting you know that she would like one with you, im guessing that she missed you as a boyfriend after you two broke up and ... (read in full...)
I am asking the questions about her past, and she says its none of my business
Q. I am almost 40, married, to my grade school crush, I love her, more than anything. We were found each other 2 years ago after over 20 years graduating high school, we led very different lives, and now I am having big trouble dealing with her ...
A. 4 January 2012: i cant believe this, people are still blaming you and accusing you of being the insecure jerk, and i cant really understand their logic. if what you say about the other guys thet are still in her life is true, then the problem is her, her past ... (read in full...)
Losing my virginity.....what do I need for my first time? How do I make sure I last long enough?
Q. Okay so when I was 16 I promised myself myself if I was 21 and still a virgin that I would lose it to someone of that year. Well here it is 6 years later and its come to the unfortunate time that I was dreading and excited for. This girl who I ...
A. 2 January 2012: but just keep in mind OP, that you should be very sure that you can take having casual sex and giving up the chance to lose your virginity and not regret it later, because if you arent sure that you could take it and live with that, then you should ... (read in full...)
Losing my virginity.....what do I need for my first time? How do I make sure I last long enough?
Q. Okay so when I was 16 I promised myself myself if I was 21 and still a virgin that I would lose it to someone of that year. Well here it is 6 years later and its come to the unfortunate time that I was dreading and excited for. This girl who I ...
A. 30 December 2011: "The reader Aresu clearly understands my predicament so dont say I only listen to men." I'm not sure if you mean that you think I'm a girl or if you are referring to something I said.
Just for the record im a guy, and by the way, I'm happy to... (read in full...)
Losing my virginity.....what do I need for my first time? How do I make sure I last long enough?
Q. Okay so when I was 16 I promised myself myself if I was 21 and still a virgin that I would lose it to someone of that year. Well here it is 6 years later and its come to the unfortunate time that I was dreading and excited for. This girl who I ...
A. 29 December 2011: Chigirl what I mean with the wasted time is not that I'm saying that waiting for someone special is hard work, what I'm trying to relate it to is to sacrifice, if you work hard for something and it doesn't accomplish anything then that was a ... (read in full...)
My Bf thought I was a virgin, because I lied. But someone sent a pix to him disproving that. How do I fix this?
Q. Please don't judge me, I know what I did was wrong. But when I meet my current boyfriend I couldn't believe having found such a lovely guy. Having been used by guys in the past, my previous relationship were just sex. No love at all. But this guy ...
A. 29 December 2011: I cant say much that hasnt been said already, but i wanted to say that if i were in your boyfriend's shoes i would never forget it, and would always still hurting, even if he broke up with you he will have to live with the tough that someone he ... (read in full...)
Losing my virginity.....what do I need for my first time? How do I make sure I last long enough?
Q. Okay so when I was 16 I promised myself myself if I was 21 and still a virgin that I would lose it to someone of that year. Well here it is 6 years later and its come to the unfortunate time that I was dreading and excited for. This girl who I ...
A. 29 December 2011: the answers you are getting OP shows that they dont understand you at all. people are big hypocrites, telling you how wrong and immature you are, when you were saving yourself and keeping a good head and knowing how you wanted your first time to be, ... (read in full...)
Please be fair about this : I'm a virgin. How can I make it easier for me to find a girl without a sexual past??
Q. okay, i have a problem and i would like some help if you guys have the time to give me some advice, is not the first time that i bring this question here, but i feel that the last time i didn't express myself correctly and only confused the readers, ...
A. 6 November 2011: Thanks everyone for your support and your opinions, it really is hard to find a girl like that, and people often like to make me feel bad for it, because they don't understand it, so is nice to see people that are cool with it. One thing that all... (read in full...)
Wife's sexual past is tormenting me
Q. I was a virgin when I met my wife. More than that, I didn't even have another serious girlfriend before then. Meanwhile, she had a bit of an adventurous past. At the time we first dated I didn't really care. However, once we fell in love it reall...
A. 5 November 2011: I think you should divorce her, this is something that it will not leave you and will make your life miserable every single day. I agree with everyone else that tracking down her exes is not something you should be doing, but what I don't agree wi... (read in full...)
She's my first everything, I'm her seconds....
Q. I'm 26 and had never dated or anything up until a year and a half ago (not a lot of confidence in that department). I've been with the same girl now for that time frame. She's amazing. She told me early on she wasn't a virgin (I am). She has only ...
A. 1 November 2011: im going to be very honest with you, but everyone who says to just get over it, they don't really know what they are talking about for someone who is still a virgin. im sure their intentions are good and really want to help you, but i highly dou... (read in full...)
Retrograde jealousy
Q. DearCupid sees many stories about men and women who find out after they are married that their partners have more sexual experience or partners than was initially understood. It is a very real problem for the one who is devastated to discover the ...
A. 20 October 2011: this is a very interesting thread, and i would want to contribute too as best as i can, and hopefully bring more insight in this topic.
OK, first of all i want to start saying where i stand in all of this. im a virgin male by choice, and from a v... (read in full...)
She had sex before we met, now I can't trust her.
Q. Hi everyone. I need some advise on what I should do. I have been with this girl for the last 5 years. The problem is that I cant resepct her or do anything nice for her. She has a past, she lost her virginity when she was 15 years old and stayed in ...
A. 14 October 2011: i can understand the issue of past sexual partners, as im a virgin myself and would only get with a virgin. but what you are doing is terrible and unfair to this girl, when you don't like someone as your partner, the only thing that you should d... (read in full...)
The reality of an open relationship is not so good
Q. Hello - My husband and I have been married for 8 years. We have talked about an open relationship and I thought this was a good idea. I had sex with another man a couple of months ago. It was only one time and it truly was just sex. It was ...
A. 23 September 2011: open relationships are always a bad idea if you want commitment, and that is because open relationship means no relationship. because if you think about it, is no different than having friends with benefits, and someone will always, always will wan... (read in full...)
I cheated on him, now he wants me to pay
Q. Hey! So, cheated on my bf and I know it was bad and all. So, please, please, please, no judgment. Trying to win him back. He says he loves me, but his trust is gone. Then he came over to my place tonite and tried real hard to have sex.I refused cos ...
A. 23 September 2011: i cant believe it, i just cant believe this. and i dont mean your problem, i mean people defending you girl over the guy, now the double standards are against men it seems. you are the one who cheated, and people are defending you, i dont agree wit... (read in full...)
Is it wrong for a virgin guy to want to marry a virgin girl?
Q. dear cupid, is it wrong for a virgin guy to want to marry a virgin woman with great personality,respect,trust and love? It seems when i mention this to women they think am crazy or i have insecurities....
A. 7 September 2011: if you have kept yourself virgin, then is a perfectly understandable standard to have, im also a virgin by choice and would only keep a relationship with a virgin woman, so you know you are not alone in this.
i agree with male anonymous who says... (read in full...)
She lied and told me she was a virgin, the truth came out while drinking
Q. Dear cupid, the woman i am suppose to marry is a liar. 2 years ago i asked her if she was a virgin because i am and didnt want to waste each orther's time if we had different ideals about premarital sex. She said she was a virgin, now that i am ...
A. 6 September 2011: you should leave her, not only you have different moral values, but she lied about something that she knew was very important to you, and she did it without remorse, had she not got drunk, you would still believe otherwise and she would still be ... (read in full...)
The fact that my GF was not a virgin when she met me, is breaking me down.I cant handle this relationship anymore...
Q. Ive being going out with my girlfriend for nearly two years now and early on in the relationship i found she wasnt a virgin. This was painful for me to hear for two reasons: 1-I belive that you should lose your virginity to someone you love and want...
A. 5 September 2011: you know what i have realized??. there is a double standard against chaste men who want chaste partners. people dont care if chaste men have stayed without sex for all their life, and they want someone who has too i dont see why it should not be ... (read in full...)
My wife was not a virgin
Q. Hello, my wife and i have being married for 4 years, i just found out she had a hymen reconstruction, i though we where both virgins now am stuck between a rock and a hard place.. I feel like cheating on her for what she did to me.what do you think ...
A. 4 September 2011: i really cant understand the logic of the people who are defending your wife. she lied to you and made you think of her as something she isnt, and you fell in her trap and fell in love with her. she didnt do any "sacrifice" for you, she did it for ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend has turned mean but I gave up my friends so he is all I've got
Q. Okay, so my boyfriend of a year and a half is just really mean lately, but here's the story. Everything was so good the first year we started seeing each other, He's the only person I've trusted 100%, and now I'm just hearing that he supposedly ...
A. 10 August 2011: well, you have benn very vague about what he is doing to wear you donw, you arent even sure he cheated, and about the yelling thing, some guys get very upset if they think that they girl is doubting them, so it could be that too. but one thing you ... (read in full...)
Is it okay for me to let my boyfriend touch my boobs?
Q. 16 yrs of age. My bf and I are dating for almost 2 yrs. We are in a long distance relationship. We opened a topic via texting about anything no malice no green mindedness,we talked about our pleasures. We're both virgins, and he ended up with a ...
A. 10 August 2011: I would say that.... No, is not okay, and for several reasons: 1. You both are very young and should not be doing it anyway. 2. Is a long distance relationship, so it Will most likely wont last long. You would regret it if you let him, when m... (read in full...)
My Fiance has had many sex partenrs before me, how do I deal with it?
Q. Hello there, I am a 21 year old girl and I am currently in love with a wonderful guy who even asked me for my hand in marriage. He is 23 years old sweet, kind and always make me smile when I am around him. But the thing is... One day he aske...
A. 10 August 2011: Well, i havent dealt with a situation like yours, but i think i can relate, because im a virgin and i want the girl i get with to be a virgin too. So i can relate to the feeling of the difference in sexual experience. Well, i think it depends... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 8 August 2011: at female anonymous: no, maybe i dont have a right to expect women to be virgins, but i don have a right to what i want in a pertner, as everyones does. anyone can decide what is a dealbreaker for them, you cant force them to just deal with it and... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 8 August 2011: at chigirl:
im so thankful to you, you really have answered and beign really atentive about my question, so i cant thank you enough. all yout answers have benn very helpful, so yea, im deeply greatful, i think you are the first one to have giv... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 8 August 2011: Share Bear:
yea i know it may sound like im putting more emphasis on virginity rather than love, but is not like that, of course i want you get to love somone and that they also love me, is what everyone ultimately wants, is just that the virgin r... (read in full...)
My friend that I love tells me to find a girlfriend but I can't think of anyone but her
Q. There is a girl who is my childhood friend but her family went to another city when i was 11..i used to like her at that time.now after ten years i contacted her.and we do lot of chatting and phone calls now and i love her a lot now and i even told ...
A. 8 August 2011: wow, 10 years is a lot of time, that shows that you really really like her if you cant stop thinking about her even after all that time.
im sorry that you are hurting so much, and seeing her family and remind you of her must be hard, but you need... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 8 August 2011: at chigirl: im so thankful to you, you really have answered and beign really atentive about my question, so i cant thank you enough. all your answers have been very helpful, so yea, im deeply greatful, i think you are the first one to have give... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 8 August 2011: Share Bear: yea i know it may sound like im putting more emphasis on virginity rather than love, but is not like that, of course i want you get to love somone and that they also love me, is what everyone ultimately wants, is just that the virgin ... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 7 August 2011: im very thankful to everyone who has answered, is very good to get the opinion of different people and outlook in this matter.
at chigirl:
special thanks to you, you have been very attentive to this question, and im very thankful for tha... (read in full...)
My friend that I love tells me to find a girlfriend but I can't think of anyone but her
Q. There is a girl who is my childhood friend but her family went to another city when i was 11..i used to like her at that time.now after ten years i contacted her.and we do lot of chatting and phone calls now and i love her a lot now and i even told ...
A. 7 August 2011: im sorry about your situation, i know is hard and forget about her in a romantic way is going to be very difficult, but for your sake and hers as well, you will need to stop thinking about her like that or you may push her away from you, and may ... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 6 August 2011: at chigirl: thanks for replying again, your attention is appreciated, i just want to point out some things to make them clear. okay, maybe you didnt feel that having lost your virginity was anymore special just because he was one too, and thats c... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 6 August 2011: at anonymous female reader: i know that she may not bleed or anything, i know that the hymen can be broken by a lot of other things, and some women may even be born without one, and some can even have sex and it doesnt break and some non virgins... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 6 August 2011: at deirdre11:
i aprreciate your insight and yes im aware that nobody is perfect, im not perfect either and no one is or will be, and i know it may be very difficult borderline unrealistic, im aware of the complications my criteria will bring me... (read in full...)
Finding that special girl is so hard...how can I meet my dream girl who meets my standards?
Q. Ok, im making this question because whenever i tell someone what i want in a girl, im misundertood and generally dont get empathy with people. What i want i a girl is obviously that i like her, both physically and mentally, that she doesnt do drugs...
A. 5 August 2011: thanks everyone for helping me out and giving their thoughts, is much apreciatted and i can see the matter at hand from other people perspectives. i just want to make something clear, im not religious, im an atheist, and i wouldnt mind if she is u... (read in full...)
| *resu's friends
These are mutual friends, so *resu has
added them and they have added *resu!
|
