Like what
he writes?
... Add *lderthandirt to your favourite agony aunts
Want to get in touch?
... Send *lderthandirt a private message | | | *lderthandirt's profile:I don't know about qualifactions or not but I do know I'm older than most of the folks that offer up questions and I have shared a lot of experiences that the folks seem to be zeroed in on. 46 years of marriage yes to the same woman. i've lived in Hawaii,California, Texas(currently in Texas) worked in Louisiana, New Jersey, Arkansas,Texas, and Indiana on a consulting engineering basis. I love to daydream about stuff[like living o a beach somewhere living off the sea, I lkie to write lyrics for proposed songs,like reading. I surf the net a lot. |
|
Should I Start To Pay?
Q. Hi I am married and my husband is not so rich. He works really hard to provide for me and and our child. Money is a hardship for him. However I have 30,000 pounds in savings. I haven't mentioned it to my husband as this was before we got mar...
A. 5 September 2014: In my world what is mine is hers too, ergo, what is hers is mine.marrage is (to me anyway) two souls becoming one. However if it's 'yours' you can make a bonfire with it if that helps keep you warm. goodness sakes what has become of this world?... (read in full...)
I'm in a high-risk pregnancy and he wants me to start earning?
Q. I have been married for 2 years,I had thought happily. After we got married, my contract terminated for my job. All very stressful but we started trying for a baby straight away. Well the upshot is that all was okay with me but there were male ...
A. 4 September 2014: Yeah, the baby is feeling your stress so stop it! If all you do is obsess over stuff that hasn't happened you'll end up in a looney bin. Straighten up! Malama Pono(look it up it just means take care of yourself).... (read in full...)
How can I invite her without it seeming wierd?
Q. Dear Cupid.. Basically I am having a small gathering on Sunday for my bday.. I am having some friends and family over and I basically really wana invite this girl.. Firstly I'm a girl, I'm 20 and have really fancied this girl for ages! However,...
A. 4 September 2014: To heck with what people think. If you think it's wierd then don't do it but don't worry about others. Don't worry about worry..life's too short to worry about small stuff and it's all small stuff.... (read in full...)
My Husband Reads Erotic literature
Q. I just happened to see my husband's browsing history while searching for a file . He seems to be reading erotic stories involving incest between mother and son .. This is the second time I ve seen him read this topic of erotic literature .. The ...
A. 4 September 2014: I had to laugh at th"is normal otherwise" comment as if he has joined a fringe group of not normal wierdos or something. Deep breath, he's as normal as they come.... (read in full...)
How has the porn industry shaped our view on relationships?
Q. I would like to know woman's view on the porn industry and how it has shaped our view on relationships. Are we being forced to believe that this is the way we should be having sex and to like it? Porn has changed over the last 20 years, the acts ...
A. 4 September 2014: Nope, don't agree at all, porn has been around forever at least since the days of the Roman Empire(they've found treasure troves of porn during excavation of Roman Ruins. As a guy, I don't see porn as having anything to do with "control". It's all ... (read in full...)
She wrote me this letter about her marriage. Should I forget about her and find someone who is single?
Q. This may be long enough but i'll try to keep it short and simple. I liked her from school. Never talked to her i was a shyguy. After college we meet on facebook. We started talking. Even she had feelings for me since school. The point now is that ...
A. 4 September 2014: Love is Blind and you just need glasses. Need to get off Facebook for good and have more realistic fantasys.... (read in full...)
What does he think now that he's seen that I'm really not skinny?
Q. Ok, so bare with me on this. I'm 24 and I have a "sex friend". We have been seeing each other for just over a year now, but I'm not a skinny girl, and you can see I'm not skinny. I'm a curvy 16 and I've never gotten completely naked with him. I've ...
A. 4 September 2014: Deep breath! you are who you are...if he don't like it tough t___y said the K___ty but the milk's still good!... (read in full...)
How odd is it that her pets are "brothers"?
Q. I've known this girl Aimée for about 3 months. Met her at work and she's really nice, seems genuine, she's not judgemental or anything like that. She seems like she'd be a good friend. Here's the catch though, we were talking about our families and ...
A. 4 September 2014: looney wouldn't be my word of choice, more like bltzo -friggy- crazy. Yeah, you might want to duck this one unless you want to share a straight jacket with her in phscho-ville.... (read in full...)
Do I owe it to my ex to give it another try?
Q. I broke up with my bf of four years about five months ago. We had a volatile relationship on both ends and even though I loved him, I was glad it was over. I felt free again. I started dating someone new about six weeks ago and we get on really...
A. 4 September 2014: You do seem confused but the 'giveaway' was the feeling of freedom you say you felt after your break-up. That tells me you felt less than free whilst involved and no one should feel that way when they are in a good relationship, ergo, I'd err on the ... (read in full...)
I don't like my best friends boyfriend at all but I don't know how to tell her I don't like him!
Q. Alright so I don't like my best friends boyfriend at all!! She started dating him about 8 months ago and all he can do is get on my nerves! So he is currently in the army and my friend is head over heels for him...she loves him. So to the reasons ...
A. 4 September 2014: Without know just how 'best friend' you two are, it's kinda hard to feel this out; Let's assume you guys have always confided in everything over the years; in that case sharing your concerns shouldn't be difficult. If however, you two are just great ... (read in full...)
I wanted to go slower than he did and asked him not to contact me
Q. I went on a couple of dates with a guy 18 months ago but he wanted the relationship to move faster than me at the time so I cooled it right off. We had both just got divorced and I wanted space to process things. We stayed in touch from time to ...
A. 4 September 2014: He doesn't take directions very well so why even try to reconnect? It's just asking for problems.... (read in full...)
How can I get him to miss me back?
Q. I've been dating this guy for over a year now. We live together. And things have been good until now. He's acting weird. Like he went to spend time with his family and friends and they live like 45 minutes to an hour away and he said he wanted to ...
A. 4 September 2014: I love what soveryconfused said,she has the deal pegged... (read in full...)
He tells me he's looking for a divorce, but ...
Q. Hi I've been seeing my ex boyfriend behind his wife's back for almost a year now. I was very much in love with him at one time. He dumped me and got married. We were together 13 years. He comes to my home and is very comfortable. He told me he was ...
A. 4 September 2014: Strong feelings or not he is demonstrating boldly that efen if you two were married, he could run around behind your back, why even entertain that future... (read in full...)
Should I warn my assistant that the man she's chatty with almost had an affair with me and is married? Or is it best for me to stay away and let this happen?
Q. A while ago I got chatting to a guy I work with and we got close very quickly. We both had a crush on each other and both wanted more, well I did anyway. He made me send him photos, chatted about sex a lot and I did really like him. He knew I liked ...
A. 3 September 2014: My gut tells me that if you stay out of it andshe gets hurt, she'll learn from it but if you get involved and it works out OK, she''l hold it against you. I keep quiet myself.... (read in full...)
Is it normal that my Bf wants to watch porn when he's getting oral? Leaves me feeling hurt.
Q. Sorry the Q is a bit long but I need to give you all the details, I really need your help!!! My boyfriend and I have an almost perfect sex life. Last night we came back very drunk from the club and started playing around for fun in order to have...
A. 3 September 2014: Ihave a difficult time try to understand why him watch porn while you give him oral sex would alarm you. It sounds to me like it would be an extra turn on for both of you to watch while giving oral.... (read in full...)
Whenever I make a move she reminds me we're friends
Q. So ive met this girl little over a year ago however we've only really gotten close these past 4 or 5 months. This girl is the best friend ive ever had, we always take each others advice on relationships and we can trust each other with anything. I ...
A. 3 September 2014: Honeypie has it correct.... (read in full...)
My husband looks down on me because I'm a housewife and he puts himself on a pedestal because he is the sole bread winner
Q. I do everything I can to be a positive uplifting person for my husband. I Build him up always say I love you first and I am the affectionate one. He can be affectionate but only on his terms. I can never do enough to please him he is always ...
A. 3 September 2014: Anyone that has ever managed a household knows it is one of the toughest jobs on the planet and if examined closely the argument could be made that a well run household would rate as the hardest job on the planet. Every day you must do more and more ... (read in full...)
Is she playing games?
Q. A young woman hired me to look at problems in her home and while I was out to fix them she was nice and even flirty, I thought this girl may even have a thing for me but out of the blue she went to my manager who insisted to come out with me on ...
A. 3 September 2014: It would be my guess that she's just alittle eccentric and is not really posturing for anything serious. Might out to just keep wondering for a good while. She just doesn't sound all that 'grounded' the way you describe it. Best lay low and play ... (read in full...)
The consequences of whatever's happened have left me feeling completely unsexy, undesired, unwanted and second best to the girls on the internet who my boyfriend masturbates to!
Q. Problems in a relationship, i moved a year ago to another country to live with the guy ive been with for 2 years now, we were long distance friends for 7 years before getting into a relationship, he was the most trustworthy, kind and understanding ...
A. 3 September 2014: Agree with wiseowl E... (read in full...)
My Husband Reads Erotic literature
Q. I just happened to see my husband's browsing history while searching for a file . He seems to be reading erotic stories involving incest between mother and son .. This is the second time I ve seen him read this topic of erotic literature .. The ...
A. 2 September 2014: Everyone has fantasy from time to time. I's no big thing!People get all bent out of shape over porn. Why? It's such a dumb thing to fret about.... (read in full...)
Why Did This Lady Act This Way?
Q. i moved area's a year ago and while here i met a lady who owns the local shop; she seemed really friendly and after some talks i invited her out for dinner one day to get to know her more as i didnt have any friends and thought to make a ...
A. 2 September 2014: I tell what to think; Think that you are much better off without a rude person out to gret you and realize this little hurt feelings would have probably been ten times worse if she'd have 'let you into her life' No sweat..just move on to another ... (read in full...)
I cheated on my wife and she won't forgive me
Q. Hello, everyone. This is my first time here. I would like some advice please. Ive been through hell for the past 2 weeks. I cheated on my wife. the worst mistake I could have ever make. My lovely beautiful loving wife, mother of my children. So ...
A. 2 September 2014: You made your bed, you're gonna have to lie in it.... (read in full...)
12 years together..will he ever marry me?
Q. Will he ever Marry me? We have been together about 12 years, we have 2 kids (6 and 8). I think I have finally come to except that he will never marry me. I don't want that to be true, but I keep bring it up and he keeps giving me excuses. The ...
A. 2 September 2014: Nope he has no "reason" to finalize ... (read in full...)
Am I being a "princess"?
Q. My boyfriend used to be my fiancé. Now I'm not sure if he's even my boyfriend anymore, but I guess that's where my question comes in. I called off the wedding about 6 weeks before we were to be married. It was a very unsatisfying engagement, ...
A. 1 September 2014: Sounds more like him trying to be a king rather than you trying to be a princess. However, leaving royalty out of the arrangement, he also sounds highly uncomitted leaving you in a position of trying to figure out whetjer or not this clown actually ... (read in full...)
I would like the power difference in our relationship to even out. Any suggestions on how to do this?
Q. I started seeing my boyfriend over a year ago, we've been official since December last year. Despite the fact that we have both been in relationships which have lasted longer, we have both discussed how this is our most serious relationship to date ...
A. 1 September 2014: the worpower does't belong in any relationship between a man and a women. Maybe between two boxers?... (read in full...)
Am I a fool to wait?
Q. Hi I need help on whether I should wait for a guy or just move on. here is the story: I recently met a man at a summer job who I began to have strong feeling for. When i chose to voice these, he reciprocated them, saying he felt a strong co...
A. 1 September 2014: OK, now, no, all men are not as stupid as this clown appears to be. And, no, you probably ought not to wait around for 'his highness' to check back in with you. This idiot will only bring you down again. Find a guy with more respect for women in ... (read in full...)
My Bf calls me insulting nasty names. I want to leave him. What can I do to ensure my future is happier?
Q. My fiancé accuses me of cheating every single day. He heard me get raped. Ever since then he has accused me of cheating. He constantly calls me a "c**t, a stupid worthless piece of s**t" and all these other fowl things. He expects me to tell him...
A. 1 September 2014: He is a dirtbag for calling you names. noonedoes that to their gf or bf. I'd suggest you leave the sob and find someone that knows how to respect you, Otherwise it will only get worse. Sounds like he grew up in a poor excuse for a homelife. Young ... (read in full...)
Is it normal that my Bf wants to watch porn when he's getting oral? Leaves me feeling hurt.
Q. Sorry the Q is a bit long but I need to give you all the details, I really need your help!!! My boyfriend and I have an almost perfect sex life. Last night we came back very drunk from the club and started playing around for fun in order to have...
A. 1 September 2014: I'd let him choose one or the other from now on, however, in his defense, since he was having a difficult time gettin off maybe he thought that some added stimulation would help. Put yourself in his place and think would I have a fantasy while he's ... (read in full...)
My husband gives me a kiss good night and a kiss good bye..that's all!
Q. My husband and I have stopped all physical contact in our marriage except for a kiss good night and a kiss good bye. At first i thought he was just stressed out but its been months and still hasnt kicked back up. He watches porn on our phone all of ...
A. 31 August 2014: Get a vibrator and make him watch as you writhe in pleasure, he'll get the hint!... (read in full...)
First-date tips?
Q. Hey guys, I have a quick question. So I got chatting to a girl on Friday night that I've seen around town a few times, I was pretty drunk but everything seemed to go well, ended up kissing a few times and ended up with her number. Been ...
A. 31 August 2014: Rule 1. make no comments about her physical appearance. "They" don't want you to be 'judgemental' and Rule 2. Pay for everything, open doors etc. Rule 3. Don't talk about you,what you think...what you like,etc. just let her her talk about her ... (read in full...)
Was this behaviour rude?
Q. HI everyone, So, I have a friend that asked if I wanted to meet up today. I told her I had a wedding to go to. She headed downtown (a 40 min drive) to hang out and asked to meet up after the wedding. So after the wedding I message her to let...
A. 31 August 2014: Of course it was rude to say the least. you got ditched(as we used to call it) take a hint and make new friends. this "friendship" has gone down the proverbial crapper.Good Luck, sorry for your pain but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger.... (read in full...)
I found out my wife was/is a call girl. How do I end this marriage with the least amount of pain?
Q. hi lovely people out there..... im really in mess. i do need your help so desperately .... please. Here is my story. i married a girl just 3 months ago. i knew her about a year. I happen to know her by a friend i used know. She was her relative...
A. 31 August 2014: my knee-jerk response is, you lucky dude you, an experienced and (I assume,talented) wife with an income. Then, I think, whoa this guy doesn't want that kind of response, so I think,OK he wants to hear how awful it is to be with her and is look... (read in full...)
Why does my b/f keep masturbating to porn when he knows how much I hate it?
Q. Okay, literally I have caught my boyfriend of one year masturbating to porn countless times. Every time he's doing it he's had the option to just have sex with me but chooses masturbation instead. I assure you that we have a sex life and a great one ...
A. 31 August 2014: Ciar is right, If you can't handle it(pun intended) then leave him!... (read in full...)
I bought the ticket, now I am not sure if I should go or not!
Q. This isn't really a big relationship questions, but it's bothering me a lot. I met this guy from Germany last month, he was travelling around my country with his friends and we hung out a lot, eventually made out and had a really fun week togethe...
A. 31 August 2014: You could ask, If he is in the slighest way a gentleman, he'll reply with a refund, other wise you're just screwed!... (read in full...)
He said marriage was not about money.
Q. Why does he talk like this? Is marriage about money or not? So I had an arguement last night with bf. I asked him if he's ready for marriage and he said yes. But said no, cause he's been out of job for 8 months now and he's reluctant ab...
A. 31 August 2014: Well, as a practicing curmudgen, I'd have to reply, "Are you kidding, everything is about money!"... (read in full...)
How do I make a text conversation fun?
Q. How do you make a conversation fun over text message. When I text my crush I feel like I can't continue the conversation with anything interesting. Whenever I would ask a question he would usually say yes or no and he'll put lol in every message. I ...
A. 31 August 2014: What I do, I don't know if it's funny or not, but I tell people that " If my reply is slow,it's because my thumb is broken and I'm having to use my nose" Some do an lol back..some don't reply at all which is the point anyway. I'm always amuse... (read in full...)
I'm worried I may be paranoid about them laughing behind my back.
Q. Basically I met this group of girls through my job. I've been there about 8 months now and I would like to think I get on with everyone, however, generally I just do my work and go home. I don't do 'office gossip' if you will. I am quite introverted ...
A. 31 August 2014: Betty Boop has it pegged! It reminds me of a guy I once worked with,We accused him of paranoia. And he answered,"Yeah. well I'd rater be paranoid than to find out later that the whole world realy was out to get me and I wasn't prepared!"... (read in full...)
Is my husband more interested in porn than he is me?
Q. Hi it's mine and my husbands relationship. We have been together nearly 4 years been married 18months, He works away on the turbines which he has done for 2 years he does 2 weeks away and a week at home, which is shortly changing to 3 weeks then 1 ...
A. 30 August 2014: Sounds like he's a workaholic and thus would have a tendency to be distracted from the 'normal' gifts of life. It's not about you, so clothes or no clothes don't worry..he just needs a break from work. Don't give up on him yet.... (read in full...)
Why don't I get approached by normal guys?
Q. I'm a young woman, and let's just say that I am very inexperienced with dating/guys/etc. I do have male friends but I've never gone on a date or had a boyfriend. I don't get out much nor do I meet many new people, but every single time I get hit on ...
A. 30 August 2014: I would hazard a guess that it is not you per se. The world has become a very course and rude place in the last few years. I see it all the time in younger men, they don't have respect... (read in full...)
Is my lack of sexual experience the reason I have so many doubts about my Gf's virginity? Was she really a virgin?
Q. I am love a very cute girl and she also, our relationship going on from last 2 year. our relationship going with love,emotions, some time fight, sadness but it is true great love having between us. one day we had decided that more close to ea...
A. 30 August 2014: Why don't you just believe her and let this nagging question leave your mind? Life is way too short to fret over such trival things. bust through a hmen is totally over-rated. and is not important at all. here is way too much emphisis plced on ... (read in full...)
Feeling guilty about walking away from my drug addict guy. Was I wrong to take some distance?
Q. Hi everyone I have been in a relationship for a few months with a guy who is a drug addict. He uses coke, meth, heroin, etc. We recently spoke about his drug addiction and I told him that I will be there to support his recovery. He just has to ...
A. 30 August 2014: yeh, I'd feel guilty too if I told someone I'd be there for them and then left when times got tough. But oh well, you can't fix stupid and doing hard drugs is stupid not a sickness. good Luck... (read in full...)
Why does my b/f keep masturbating to porn when he knows how much I hate it?
Q. Okay, literally I have caught my boyfriend of one year masturbating to porn countless times. Every time he's doing it he's had the option to just have sex with me but chooses masturbation instead. I assure you that we have a sex life and a great one ...
A. 26 August 2014: Alrigt then, why not join him? Just the two of you and the computer images...Spwend some 'together time' Or, find out what he like and do it for him. don't get all bent outa shape ove it. It's just images on a screen not a real thing.... (read in full...)
How has the porn industry shaped our view on relationships?
Q. I would like to know woman's view on the porn industry and how it has shaped our view on relationships. Are we being forced to believe that this is the way we should be having sex and to like it? Porn has changed over the last 20 years, the acts ...
A. 15 August 2014: I disagree with the last few lines regarding control. Some women ike that messy act. Porn has been around for a tousand years or more. It's just in the past decade there's been this outrage over it. I guess certain groups feel betrayed or left ... (read in full...)
| *lderthandirt's friends
These are mutual friends, so *lderthandirt has
added them and they have added *lderthandirt!
|
