A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:i moved area's a year ago and while here i met a lady who owns the local shop; she seemed really friendly and after some talks i invited her out for dinner one day to get to know her more as i didnt have any friends and thought to make a friendship.She replied that I would have to wait a month as she had 3 businesses and was busy until then. WELL we exchanged numbers, but I never ever chased it up. Its been over a year now and although we've had little contact she never brings up or messaged me on why we never set the food day.Things like that annoy me...i avoid her these days... any advice why she did that to me?p.s since then ive made new friends nowbut i always wondered why that lady acted that way?I guess i should let that go though? and move on?that lady gave me a bad impression because she seemed so nice and friendly...it felt like a frendship rejection.. just wondering what to make of it?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2014): I am the original poster.I dont want to appear desperate or needy by trying to talk to her ... thats why i've been avoiding her and dont go to her shop anymore or message her phone.However i know that cant last forever. If i see her i would say hello but i wouldnt want the dinner date now? it was her behaviour which really got to me.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2014): I think you're being a bit immature about this. She was honest with you - she has 3 businesses to run and said could you wait. If she never contacted you about that, but did invite you to other things, then maybe she slightly misunderstood and just thought you wanted a friendship.Or, maybe she was just busy and thought that if you were really interested you would persist. You really are getting upset about this because you're assuming the worst and then being immature about it - you're not really thinking of things from her perspective and giving her the benefit of the doubt. If I had 3 businesses and a guy came into my shop and asked me out for dinner I would probably just think "Okay, if he's serious he will ask me in a month when I'm less busy". It would be very hard to think of dating whilst running 3 businesses. I think you are being rather unkind.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (2 September 2014):
 Why ignore her? If you run into her, talk to her or just say hi. If you WANT to get to know her, MAKE the first move?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 September 2014): I am the original poster.
I did not ask for the food day because from what I understood she was the one who was meant to contact me when she was free - and she never did!
since then she has invited me to 2 food party events but that was not exactly what I asked for.
Any advice? i keep trying to avoid her... should i stay away from her? or do i just put this down to misunderstandings?
she's iranian by the way and not english.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (2 September 2014):
 well why didn't you ask her for that "food day"?
if she's really busy then it may have slipped her mind.
I would not take it personally at all... just let it go and move on.
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A
male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (2 September 2014):
 I tell what to think; Think that you are much better off without a rude person out to gret you and realize this little hurt feelings would have probably been ten times worse if she'd have 'let you into her life' No sweat..just move on to another challenge.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (2 September 2014):
Maybe she thought you weren't really interested? As you never followed up or contacted her?
That would kind of make sense to me. Specially if she has a lot of business ventures that keeps her busy maybe making new friends who seems a little reluctant might not be on her list.
I don't think she did it to be malicious.
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