Hopeless romantic...
Q. Ok. So here's whats going on with me. Sorry if this ends up getting too long. A bit of background as to why I even ask this question. Typically I am the one helping my friends with this sort of thing. I mean, I'm going into couples counseling, but I ...
A. 13 June 2011: Sounds to me like you have already answered your own question. The thing that I have learned in relationships is that if something seems fishy, there is probably a reason behind that. Seems to me that there probably was something going on with that ... (read in full...)
Why do I still love this woman even though she hates my guts? And how can she erase me so quickly from her life?
Q. I was dumped 3 weeks ago for the third time by who was then my Fiance. We dated for 2.5 years. We were a day away from moving in together and we got into an argument. After apologizing for the argument and telling her that I love her very much ...
A. 9 June 2011: First of all I want to say how sorry I am to hear you are in such pain. I too had a similar situation a year ago and I am still not over it completely. I still break down often over how badly I was treated by someone I loved more than anything. I ... (read in full...)
I want something more! How do I change our situation?
Q. i ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years.i am 29 and he is 32. in july he broke up with me because latelly we had problems. basically as time passed i wanted a more serious commitment from him,but he got pressured,and he started going out all th...
A. 19 January 2011: This is just an example of what I am talking about.. ACTIONS SPEAK LOUDER THAN WORDS:
From me June 2009:
When can we talk to someone about getting pre-approved for the house?
Are you ignoring this because you don't want to do it or because ... (read in full...)
I want something more! How do I change our situation?
Q. i ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years.i am 29 and he is 32. in july he broke up with me because latelly we had problems. basically as time passed i wanted a more serious commitment from him,but he got pressured,and he started going out all th...
A. 19 January 2011: Yeah, my boyfriend didn't leave me for someone else either, he left me for his own selfish, self-serving reasons. You are going to do whatever it is that you want to do because you feel very deeply for him & obviously no one will be able to help you ... (read in full...)
I want something more! How do I change our situation?
Q. i ve been with my boyfriend for 3 years.i am 29 and he is 32. in july he broke up with me because latelly we had problems. basically as time passed i wanted a more serious commitment from him,but he got pressured,and he started going out all th...
A. 16 January 2011: You write: "And also...since he wants to be alone,why does he constantly see me? From my point of you if you want to break up with someone, you dont keep in touch with that person and more important you dont do things together which you would do if ... (read in full...)
Am I being realistic, or will finding the right guy always be a fantasy?
Q. I m in my early 30s, and at this point of my life i m more than ready to start a family. I m doing a lot of dating, but most of the guys that i meet are not financially stable. I feel bad at times to base my choice on their financial situatio...
A. 14 January 2011: I disagree with the first two responses. Yes, no one is perfect, but there are things that you can live with and things that are deal breakers. It sounds like that you want someone who is financially stable and on your level financially and if ... (read in full...)
Why do men play games... how long should I wait for a call or should I call him?
Q. Just wondering from a man's perpective... how long should a girl wait for a guy to call? I met this guy on Facebook and we have a lot of mutual friends.. actually, he went to my high school, so I'm sure we'd have tons in common. Anyway, we kept ...
A. 4 January 2011: He's actually asked me to hang out twice, the first time I was out of town and the second time I already had plans.. I like the more casual style of dating... like meeting up with friends or whatever, because to be honest, I don't like the dates ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend finds me physically repulsive now
Q. I would like to get a read on what is considered "normal" loss of attraction in a relationship, so I can at least put upper and lower bounds on what would be reasonable as it applies to my circumstances. Backstory: I am 31 years old, and have be...
A. 30 December 2010: Go back to the gym if that makes you happy.. and it's' good for your health as well. As for the girlfriend, I really don't understand what is going through her head. 15 lbs. is not a lot of weight at your height.. and this girl is supposed to love ... (read in full...)
We love one another very much, but we can't go on like this...
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together for 2 years. Our relationship has had many ups and downs. We're very different people and we've both gone through major crises while being together. It put a lot of stress on our relationship. The last year has ...
A. 30 December 2010: I'm going to answer your question because nobody else has offered any input. Lack of communication and respect are kind of a big deal in a relationship because otherwise you are going to end up fighting all the time (which it sounds like you are). ... (read in full...)
Can any of you ladies expain to me where I'm going wrong with women??
Q. Hi there Can any of you ladies expain to me where I'm going wrong with women. I'm 32 and find it hard to meet girls, and when I do, I keep failing. Most of my friends are settling down now so my only choice seems to be online dating. I'm geti...
A. 24 December 2010: I have to be completely honest... I've done this before myself. And you know that saying, it's not you it's me? In my case, it really is me, not the guys on match.com. I was recently dumped horribly and am terrified of dating.. so everytime I set ... (read in full...)
What is wrong with guys?
Q. k, what is wrong with guys? everysingle time i say basically anything or try to talk to my boyfriend about anything he thinks i am bitching.... like at dinner tonight for example.. i cooked (like always) and told him hes guna do the dishes for once. ...
A. 24 December 2010: I don't know what's wrong with men, but what you just wrote reminds me of a scene in that movie "The Break-Up" with Jennifer Anniston and Vince Vaughn :) I totally understand your pain though... I felt like I did everything in my last relationship ... (read in full...)
Should I meet him half way?
Q. I'm new to online dating, but I met a guy, we started talking, and decided to meet in person for coffee. He suggested a place, I agreed to it. I looked up the directions, it's about a 50 minute drive for me and 5 minutes for him lol. It's by his ...
A. 19 December 2010: No, I don't think that would be rude at all. If he knows how far away you live, then I think it's a bit inconsiderate on his part to only drive five minutes from his house, but expect you to drive 50. Suggest it and see what he says, if he doesn't ... (read in full...)
Distance is murder to your relationship.....
Q. Me and my girlfriend love each other really much but she lives in Florida and I live in the Netherlands. I only get to see her once a year. Thus far we have been togheter for 9 months, meaning I only saw her once for a short period of time, next ...
A. 11 December 2010: She "loves" you, but yet she kisses and has crushes on other guys. Sweetie, that's not real love... I hate to break it to you. You are young so you should be out meeting girls your age who live in the same country you do. Long distance ... (read in full...)
How can I tell him that it's never going to happen, but without hurting him?
Q. Hello. I'm really close friends with a guy and we get along great. We share a lot of interests and we always have fun just talking with each other and hanging out. But recently I've kind of been getting a vibe that he may like me as more than a ...
A. 11 December 2010: I find that it's best to be as honest as you can (without telling him you prefer women).. Just tell him that you like being his friend and enjoy his company, but that you don't want to have any sort of relationship because you think it would mess up ... (read in full...)
What could I do to get him? Should I try making him jealous?
Q. Heey. I recently broke things off with the guy i liked because he said he isn't looking for a relationship as he isn't willing to work and is too immature for one. He said that he prefers to be single. He also implied he isn't looking for sex beca...
A. 29 November 2010: Find someone else to like.. this guy doesn't want a relationship with you & he told you as much. When a guy tells you he doesn't want something or is not ready for something, you should believe him. I know that sucks to hear because you like him, ... (read in full...)
Why do cheaters feel entitled to lie, sneak and hurt others?
Q. Hi all, when I read through questions and answers I read about people cheating on others (my ex did it to me) It literally tore me apart. But my question is; If you are a cheater, Why do you do this? Why can't you get out of a relationship honestly ...
A. 29 November 2010: People who cheat make me sad. Relationships are so not easy, but I think if people were to communicate better about what their needs are in and outside of the bedroom, it might help. I could go on and on about this, but I'm just too tired. On a ... (read in full...)
Do guys say cute stuff that they don't mean?
Q. So you know how everyone says, guys always say stuff they don't mean. Well I was wondering is that really true, cause now I'm starting to think sometimes when my boyfriend says cute stuff that maybe he doesn't mean it. I know this kinda sounds ...
A. 29 November 2010: Yes.. boys lie. Men lie too if they think they will be able to get into your panties... Beware! :) Don't give them any until you have known and been dating them for a long time... and by that, I mean months and months... and then use protection!! ... (read in full...)
Husband doesn't like being with me in Public
Q. I'm 38 and married to a younger man. He and I have great chemistry at home (awesome, in fact) but he completely withdraws and doesn't want to be with me in public. I love to dance and he will not dance with me in public although he will dance with ...
A. 29 November 2010: How much younger is he? This sounds a little sketchy to me. There should be no reason why your husband should be embarrassed of you out in public.. and the fact that he cheated is also crappy. Why are you so stuck on this guy if he treats you ... (read in full...)
I can't trust him again!
Q. We broke up with my boyfriend for 8months bt he kept calling me until i gave up en agreed for meeting , we broke up because he cheated on me bt i still love him very much my problem is now i cant trust him again now im confused wht should i do...
A. 28 November 2010: You won't be able to trust him again. If you want a relationship with no trust, then go for it. My advice is to find someone else who won't disrespect you like that. Healthy relationships are built on trust and when a person betrays your trust you ... (read in full...)
She broke my heart and married another, now 10 years later I don't know if I can be with her.
Q. Dear Cupid, I am a 37 year old male with an issue that I really really need help with. I have been looking on your site and it seems as though this question has been asked before, and to my amazement; It seems as though I am not alone. Still, I ...
A. 19 November 2010: I understand where you are coming from... If my ex came back begging, I would probably feel just like you because I loved him more than I've ever loved anything and he just sh** all over that. When someone you love betrays you and you lose your ... (read in full...)
Surviving being left for someone else, and coming out on the other side a stronger person
Q. Four months ago my long term boyfriend of three years dumped me for another girl. It has been a long, hard and painful journey, but it does get better. I have learned a lot from my experiences and have actually become grateful for this in some ways. ...
A. 19 November 2010: This is soooooooooo awesome... I posted yesterday, but somehow it didn't show up. I just wanted to tell you that I cried when I read this, so thank you for posting it. Everything you wrote here is exactly what I went through/am going thru and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend thinks he's ugly but yet he cheated on me!
Q. im in so much pain, i dont trust anyone anymore and i dont know who to turn to for help! i was with him for 2years where our longest breakup only lasted 2weeks! he always told me how much he loved me, how he could never do without me, how he could...
A. 18 November 2010: Dump him and don't ever look back... trust me, you are too young to put up with this crap... obviously, he has so many issues with his self esteem and is screwed up in the head that he doesn't know is ass from a hole in the ground right now. I've ... (read in full...)
She broke my heart and married another, now 10 years later I don't know if I can be with her.
Q. Dear Cupid, I am a 37 year old male with an issue that I really really need help with. I have been looking on your site and it seems as though this question has been asked before, and to my amazement; It seems as though I am not alone. Still, I ...
A. 18 November 2010: I almost think it's sweet that you loved someone for so long... You must be a great guy, but also a little foolish ;) My question is, has she made you any promises? Did she promise to marry you or be with you after the divorce is final? You should ... (read in full...)
He keeps telling me I need to lose weight and it's really hurting my feelings.
Q. OK, here's a cliche situation. I am an older, married woman with two kids. I have a demanding job and I take on the bulk of the child care responsibilities. I work out abotu 3 times a week. My husband has repeatedly told me that I need to "take ...
A. 18 November 2010: I don't know how old you are, but 26-29 I wouldn't say was "older." :)
To be quite honest, I have had this in the past from ex's who ended up leaving... is that the "real" reason why?? I'll never know. I'm actually 5'6 and about 15-20 lbs. ove... (read in full...)
Is he using his depression as a cop out?
Q. My ex boyfriend broke up with me 6 weeks ago because he was depressed and didn't know what he wanted he said he needed time to figure things out. He said we may get back together in the future but we may not. Anyways i tried to do things like send ...
A. 8 November 2010: Sorry, I was so moved by your post that I had to offer a little more because your situation sounds so similar to mine. I have been through depression, and like I said, I still needed those around me who loved me to offer support. Had a been in a ... (read in full...)
Is he using his depression as a cop out?
Q. My ex boyfriend broke up with me 6 weeks ago because he was depressed and didn't know what he wanted he said he needed time to figure things out. He said we may get back together in the future but we may not. Anyways i tried to do things like send ...
A. 8 November 2010: I've had something similar happen to me. He said he had some issues from his childhood/past (repressed memories and whatnot) to work out and needed to do it alone because he feared he would hurt me in the process. It just about killed me because I ... (read in full...)
Hey what's the deal?
Q. he says he doesnt want to be with me anymore ever again and that he has let go of all his feelings for me. and that he isnt in love with me and probably never will be again. when i got kicked out of my house he opened his doors for me (i know h...
A. 2 November 2010: I don't know... My ex did the same.. He came over and we talked and had sex and then I went to sleep and I had gotten a text message that I hadn't read yet and he opened it and then woke me up to hand me my phone, so I knew he had looked through it. ... (read in full...)
Does the fact that he has difficulty feeling love and empathy mean he's a narcissist?
Q. Does the fact that he has difficulty feeling love and empathy mean he's a narcissist? He has admitted to me that he doesn't love easily. He has had several relationships before me (one that lasted 2 years!) and claims that he never loved his prev...
A. 2 November 2010: Honestly, I would be concerned too. I agree with Caring Guy on this one... I think he's spot on. And honestly, why would a guy spend two years with a woman and not love them? That's a long time to spend with someone as he was not only wasting his ... (read in full...)
How do you know what to choose...love of your life or great career opportunity?
Q. How do you know when to choose a great career opportunity over the love of your life, or choose your love over the career opportunity?...
A. 2 November 2010: Why can't you have both? Does this person not want to go with you? I guess it depends on how long you have been together. If it hasn't been that long, like less than a year, then it's a tough call. I always say, keep the love... but that's just ... (read in full...)
Are baby steps the right way to go about this?
Q. I am in love with my ex still, its been 3 months till our horrible break up and well, he called me (i was strong) and he said he wanted to work things out, things were okay and kinda flirty, but if hes working things out or trying to work things out ...
A. 1 November 2010: I'm going to be honest with you here... if the break-up was his fault & it sounds to me like it was, if he really wanted to work things out, you would know it... he would be calling and apologizing and you would be seeing each other instead of you ... (read in full...)
Is she growing fed up of me?
Q. I'm in a long distance relationship right now. I Love my girlfriend deeply and care about her very much and think about her all the time. I've sent letters to her, and she knows how much i feel for her. She was recently up here from mexico for two ...
A. 1 November 2010: To be quite honest, if you are asking these types of questions on an internet site, then could this really be the one for you? Real and lasting relationships begin with good communication. I hate to tell you this, but it doesn't sound good. First ... (read in full...)
If you make a mistake do you own up to it?
Q. Hey just a general question. If you make a genuine mistake, and then lie about it, would you say you was bad person? What if you wouldn't get found out, but your conscience preys on you? Would you finally own up, even though you know people woul...
A. 1 November 2010: Yes, if you made a mistake and you realize you made it, you should own up to it. That's what being a good person is all about. Everyone makes mistakes, but another part of being a good person is being able to brush aside all your personal issues ... (read in full...)
Unresolved questions from my break up, please help me!
Q. My live-in boyfriend and I broke up 5 months ago and while I am better, it's still painful when you trust someone so much and believe in everything they have told you. All I want to know is, why after you have been so close to someone, woken u...
A. 30 October 2010: I appreciate all of your answers....It's just hard & there is probably nothing anyone could say to make it 100% better, although I love reading the responses. I hate coming home to an empty house. I don't want to go out because I loved having the ... (read in full...)
Unresolved questions from my break up, please help me!
Q. My live-in boyfriend and I broke up 5 months ago and while I am better, it's still painful when you trust someone so much and believe in everything they have told you. All I want to know is, why after you have been so close to someone, woken u...
A. 29 October 2010: I get what you are saying and I completely agree, but why would someone leave a person they still have feelings for? I don't get that. Even a week after he moved out, he came over and kissed me so passionately and said that he loved me sooooo much. ... (read in full...)
Should some part of me actually believe my ex???
Q. My ex and i were together for a almost 4 years. We had a year of no contact after the break up. We have been talking for almost a year. He isn't the type to just jump back into a relationship. To him, I don't think its a switch you turn on and ...
A. 5 June 2010: How old are you two? I feel for you, I really do because I am going thru the same exact thing right now except me and my ex have been split for only one month with no contact. We lived together and he moved out. Every day is a struggle. I just ... (read in full...)
What is it with men and pride????
Q. My boyfriend and I of two years - he lived with me for 1.5 years... We were perfect for each other.. We had our share of ups and downs but seriously we were the couple that everyone envied.. both attractive and totally lovey dovey smitten with ...
A. 5 June 2010: I appreciate all your comments and I will take a piece of each of what you said to heart..Just FYI, I WAS calm about the situation and talked with him calmly at first... and this has been going on for a while (over a year) & he's been very secretive ... (read in full...)
Should I tell him about the secret bank account?
Q. Well my boyfriend and I have been together for about 3 years and we always talk about everything, we are totally honest but that doesn't mean we agree or we come to a compromise. I am the most financially stable thinker between the both of us, I ...
A. 4 June 2010: I think you are smart to have a secret acct. I will do the same in my future relationships. My boyfriend of 2 years just moved out.. why? Because we kept getting in fights about money.. He makes more than I make... let's just say he makes over ... (read in full...)
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