A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm new to online dating, but I met a guy, we started talking, and decided to meet in person for coffee. He suggested a place, I agreed to it. I looked up the directions, it's about a 50 minute drive for me and 5 minutes for him lol. It's by his place. Would it be appropriate if I asked to change the meeting place to somewhere half way between us? Or should I stick with the original plan? I don't want to appear rude Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2010): Yes, start off by making sure he's someone who will come halfway to meet you not just in distance but in compromise. It will tell you a lot about him.
A
male
reader, Illithid +, writes (20 December 2010):
 Negotiating over a place isn't rude at all and going somewhere in the middle would be more fair, certainly, but if he was suggesting places, he'd naturally want to pick somewhere he knows and has been before, which would mean somewhere near him. If you think there's a good chance you'll see him a second time, perhaps go ahead and meet him at the place he suggested (home ground, where he'll feel more confident) and next time, suggest that he meet you at one of YOUR favorite places in your area.
I don't think he's as much being inconsiderate as he's just not comfortable picking a place at random off of a map somewhere he hasn't already been to and can trust for a first date.
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A
female
reader, Nouvelle32 +, writes (19 December 2010):
No, I don't think that would be rude at all. If he knows how far away you live, then I think it's a bit inconsiderate on his part to only drive five minutes from his house, but expect you to drive 50. Suggest it and see what he says, if he doesn't want to do that then that would be a red flag for me.
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