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... Send *olddigger99 a private message | | | *olddigger99's profile:I have been married since November 2009. I am a full time college student working on her Master's in Educational Reading. My husband and I are not perfect by any means, but do our best on any given day, therefore, I am not qualified to give answers, only my opionion on issues.
Life is short, and it is important not to let it pass you by. If you are not happy, only you have the power to change that. I find it important that you continue to work towards your goals and not sacrafice who you are or who you plan to be for the interest of others. You are who you are and only you hold the power to be who you want to be.
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Can he change? There's good and bad.
Q. Married five years. With the exception of my pregnancy, my husband has emotionally and physically abused me the entire time. He talks down to me and expects everything in the house to be done his way from meals to laundry. When I do something wrong ...
A. 7 May 2016: I can honestly say that I know what it's like to live with someone like that. My husband constantly talked down to me, grabbed me rough, was never happy, yelled and threw temper tantrums. He got out of the military in 2008--after 8 years of service. ... (read in full...)
What do women think of very hairy guys?
Q. What do women think of very hairy guys? Is it a turn off and a major deal breaker when a guy is very hairy on his body? Be honest....
A. 7 May 2016: Very hairy? No, not me. Somewhat hairy? Yes. All women are different, but it's important to just be yourself. If you constantly try to conform yourself to everyone else's likings, then you will never be happy. Just be you!... (read in full...)
Gym is packed most of the time, so how do I go up to him and start a conversation? Scared of rejection.
Q. Okay so I have been going consistently to the gym since january. Back when I was freshly single. I spotted someone very cute but I looked awful cause I go to work out not look at guys but something about this guy makes me want to go talk to him. ...
A. 14 June 2015: I am a regular gym-goer also, and I agree with everyone who has commented so far. Take things slow...say hi with a wave of your hand or a smile at first. After a few weeks of doing this, speak to him when you're near equipment. If he lifts weights, ... (read in full...)
What are your thoughts on the Mrs. America Pagaent?
Q. I was wondering what people actually thought about the MRS America contest. Do people think it is a good thing for married women to try out for or do they feel sorry for these women trying out or that they may have self esteem issues and need ...
A. 19 June 2014: Do they still do the bathing suit "fitness" thing? If so, scratch it off your "to do" list. I read that one of the former contestants of the Miss America pageant suggested a "boot camp" type event to help gauge a contestants fitness level. She could ... (read in full...)
Married 19 years and my wife has never had an interest in sex. Why does she not like sex?
Q. Hi, I, too, have the common (and perhaps the oldest) question: Why doesn't my wife like sex? I have been married for 19 years. I've been very successful, we've traveled, and we even purchased our dream house and live a comfortable life. 19 ...
A. 25 April 2013: sex is different for females as we don't crave it as often as men do. Personally, I had a pituitary tumor that messed with my hormones. This hormone imbalance caused me to lose interest in sex. You've mentioned that you've gone to see a counsel... (read in full...)
My Mom seems to want me to be more like her. But that's not me. How can I handle this problem?
Q. hey aunties and uncles, it's not a relationship question, well not of the romantic kind anyway. just a quick background, As a child I wasn't very shy but as the years passed I suppose I became shy with strangers at school I wasn't bullied, ...
A. 25 April 2013: Don't be anyone but yourself man....she's your mom...she has to accept you!... (read in full...)
Why do I keep coming back to him for sex when the sex isn't even good?
Q. Dear Cupid, I have known this guy for about 3 years give or take. He's 4 years older than me. Ever since I met him I have had this strong sexual attraction towards him. We first hooked up when I was 18, then the second time when I was 19. I am abo...
A. 8 February 2013: Sometimes, it's not about the sex, but about the attraction. Remember, attraction isn't just physical. If he's an honest, good-hearted man, then that's attractive to most women. You might also be missing the physical connection that you feel with ... (read in full...)
Wisdom teeth problem
Q. more of a health issue than relationship, but advice is appreciated, aunts this is so not a relationship question but it's bothering me , I was fine till recently I realized my wisdom teeth was coming out I thought I didn't even have them, I went to ...
A. 8 February 2013: It all depends on how they're coming out. If they're infected or impacted, you need to have them removed. Seriously though, even if they're impacted or infected, it's rare when all 4 of them are like that. If you do need to have them removed, ... (read in full...)
Do I persist? Or break up? We argue quite frequently.
Q. okay so I would appreciate some good advice. I got into a relationship extremely quickly a couple of months ago, in hindsight I wish it wasn't as sudden as we didn't have time to get to know each other better. We argue quite frequently and h...
A. 16 December 2012: EVERY and I do mean EVERY couple argues. However, I agree with Red591, if you don't love him and don't see a possibility of you loving him, then you're just wasting your time and his. ... (read in full...)
Sure I have not visited her. But I need directions. How much more effort should I put into this friendship?
Q. Not a love question, just friendship. I have this girlfriend that we are not that terribly close, though enough to be friends for the past 4 years. She is the most unreliable person on Earth, I think. It's impossible to make any decisions ...
A. 16 December 2012: Friends grow apart. Look at the qualities she possesses now. Do those qualities define the type of friendship you are looking for? In my opinion, there's an easy fix--stop trying to be her friend. ... (read in full...)
Do you have to be physically attracted to someone to have sex with them?
Q. I think I worded a question wrong the other day, but what I really wanted to know is do men sleep with women that they aren't physically attracted to, especially more than once. I think my suggested question title got changed and people basicall...
A. 11 June 2012: I asked my husband this question and he's helping me reply: I haven't read your first post, but according to my husband, a man CAN have an errection without being attracted to a person--especially if he has been drinking or is drunk. He al... (read in full...)
Is he more than a sex buddy? I'm confused, what should I do?
Q. I have a sex buddy and I'm always understanding towards him. I don't want him to think I'm so demanding or clingy so I play it off. There are times when I get jealous and show it, like last week. We were in the pool and my friend splashed water ...
A. 11 June 2012: Love? Definately not. When you love someone, you are NOT afraid to show your true feelings when others are around--even your brother. But...with that being said, it does sound like the two of you "like" each other. Since you've only told him that... (read in full...)
Should I try and improve myself for my g/f or break-up and concentrate on my job?
Q. Hi everyone, I'm a 24 years old guy who has a 22 years old girl. We have been seeing each other for a little over 9 months. We're both working in the same company albeit different office. We're doing sales. It's a very time-consuming line of work ...
A. 10 June 2012: My advise--LEAVE!!! Run as fast as you can and stay away!!! From what you've described this girl to be, she will be the death of you. I mean--you can't even have female friends and she is high maintenced??? Boy--you can do WAY BETTER THAN THAT! She ... (read in full...)
Was I justified in losing my cool?
Q. Hey aunts, I need some help... I have been with my gf for over a year. As a couple, personality-wise and the like, we are great. We share many common interests and opinions, and when we talk, we can talk for hours and never run out of stuff to ...
A. 10 June 2012: A few things come to mind when I read your statement. First of all, you didn't mention exactly what you said. If you cursed at her and threatened her in any way, then NO, your argument was NOT justified, but if those things did not happen, then ... (read in full...)
How do I talk to guys?
Q. Alright. I'm 16 and a girl. I'm known for being quiet and shy. Some say I'm mature. But lately I've come across an observation that made me doubt it. I act SO immature infront of guys. Not only guys I like but guys in general. I've developed ...
A. 8 June 2012: What you're going through is normal, especially for someone your age and for someone who has had to move to a different country. 1. Talking to a guy is like talking to anyone else really--especially someone you don't know. The first thing is t... (read in full...)
Is that a chance to date her or is she just pushing me aside?
Q. So there's this girl (isn't there always?) in my class that was being ever-increasingly nice to me over the last few months, saying she liked my clothes, being funny, joking, etc. Eventually I ran into her at a coffee shop to study for an AP exam ...
A. 8 June 2012: Well, one important detail that you left out was whether or not her "friend" that you saw her with was a male or a female.... But, let me be clear, I don't know any females, including myself, that would hang out with a male if she wasn't intereste... (read in full...)
Is it wrong that I get naked for this European guy online?
Q. I have been chatting with this guy in Europe for about six months now. I am VERY attracted to him and I think he feels the same way. We always have great chats and make each other laugh. He constantly tells me how beautiful and perfect I am and that ...
A. 8 June 2012: 6 months is quite a long time for a long distance "chat". Are you guys in a relationship or are you just friends? My husband travels a lot and I'll admit that I've done this a few times with him--but just like AuntyEm stated, we are in an ... (read in full...)
My parents cant stand the thought of me having a boyfriend! They want me to marry a good Indian boy, but I'm old enough to decide what I want
Q. Hi, I'm 24 years old. I've got a degree, job and unfortunately for Indian parents a boyfriend. I've tried my hardest to tell them I was in a relationship. I would tell them then the next time they saw me they would act like they had forgotte...
A. 30 April 2012: I'm not Indian, so I don't understand the tradition, but I do have a tiny insight into a similar scenario.
I'm of Mexican-American origin. Typically, you're told to marry within your race, within your religion, young and have kids immediat... (read in full...)
Boyfriend is going on holiday with his ex wife and kids, should I just accept it or should I say something?
Q. Iv been dating a guy since January and he has just told me that at the end of may he will be going on holiday for a week to Tenerife with his ex wife and their two children. He says it's just to make the children happy but I still feel jealous and ...
A. 28 April 2012: First and foremost, you said you were "dating". Is this casual dating or are you exclusive??? Is he your boyfriend? If the answer is YES, he is your boyfriend and you are exclusive, then I think it's fishy! Why would he go on vacation with hi... (read in full...)
My girlfriend had violent ex and she slapped me last night. Is she into that?
Q. I have a wonderful girlfriend- we get along super well and even though we have disagrements, we never fight and have a great chemistry. A few years ago, she came out of a bad relationship where the guy she was with would insult her, call her 's...
A. 28 April 2012: I don't think she likes the abuse, that's why her ex is her EX!!! Although, I agree with Odds. I don't know a woman, including myself, who doesn't like a bit of dominance in the bedroom. Start off easy. I honestly don't like pain--like bitin... (read in full...)
I'm curious about how others would describe the way it feels when their significant other touches them
Q. I'm curious about how others would describe the way it feels when their significant other touches them. :) I know when my girlfriend touches me, it's almost indescribable--she'll stroke my back, shoulders, arms, hands etc., sometimes really lightly ...
A. 27 April 2012: My husband travels a lot with his work, so when we finally are together--it's magic!
Just seeing him makes my heart flutter. I know this sounds silly, but I understand what you mean! When he touches me, not necessarily sexually, but when he holds... (read in full...)
Please help, I feel disgusted.
Q. I feel ashamed of myself after masturbating over webcam to my friend, I found it a buzz at first, but now I feel sick of myself and hate myself for doing it. Is it normal to feel this way? Is it even normal to do it in your mid teens? I can't look ...
A. 27 April 2012: Well, if he's gay, he probably enjoyed it.
Honestly though, if you don't feel comfortable with it, don't do it again. I agree with C. Grant...this is a learning experience for you.
... (read in full...)
Afraid to tell my parents that we're getting married?
Q. Hello all! I am 20 and my now fiance is 23, so we're pretty young, but we are so excited to get married! My only problem is that I am EXTREMELY nervous to tell my parents. We want to tell everyone and get the plans going (we want to get married n...
A. 27 April 2012: I agree with the other posters here....you already live together, so they'll be expecting this at some point, right?
I would venture to say that you're nervous telling ur parents that you're getting married because you're afraid of what they'll ... (read in full...)
Should I keep doing No Contact and wait for him to contact me first?
Q. My boyfriend (or ex) and I have been together on/off for over 2 years. We are both in our mid 20s. Our relationship is serious that we actually talked about our future togehter like getting married etc.. Everything was okay until a few months ago...
A. 27 April 2012: Wow! Girl...if he asked for the 'no contact' then give it to him! His loss anyways. There's nothing more disturbing than a woman who can't give a guy the time he 'needs'. But honestly, if I were you, after 2 weeks, I would've considered myself ... (read in full...)
Is she just being friendly, or is she trying to hint at something?
Q. There was this girl in my classes (both lecture and lab), well, from what I know there's not really a strong vibe between us (from my end anyway). We sat across from each other in our group of 4 in lab (I'm the only guy in the group by the way...
A. 27 April 2012: This girl is really weird!!! So...she says she's in a relationship, but then hints that she might like you??? Doesn't sound like anything I would to if I was interested in someone, but what do I know--I'm married? Ever since I tied the knot, my game ... (read in full...)
Can anyone share any success stories after having IVF?
Q. I am 28 years old and have been with my partner for 3 years he is also 28. We have been trying for a baby for over 1 year now and have just been told that my partner has a low sperm count and we will need help to have our baby. We are going to have ...
A. 27 April 2012: I don't have any information to share with you, only well wishes. My husband and I have been trying for a child for 2 1/2 years already, but it turned out I had a pitutary tumor which was causing infertility. After my surgery, I ended up with ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend wants me to move in with her, should I do it when we cant really afford it and I'm not ready?
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for like a year and a half. I go to school and work and i try my best to make time for her. I'm not the perfect man and i've been told by her that i'm not the best listener and i understand that. When we where dating for ...
A. 27 April 2012: If you're not ready--don't do it! You are not being a mama's boy, you're just being smart with your money. Honestly, in this day and age, that's a good thing! I stayed at home while I attended college and it saved me a LARGE amount of money! If you ... (read in full...)
How can I tell my teacher that she is like a second mother to me?
Q. first of all, i have an english teacher and i love her very much as a second mother but she doesn't know that. and i really want to tell her that i love her as a second mother but i don't know how she is going to react if i told her that. so, what ...
A. 7 October 2011: I agree with Doe Eyed Beauty.....You don't have to tell her that you think of her like a second mother. Try using different words to express your fondness of her. Simply tell her thank you for being a great teacher. That will get the message across. ... (read in full...)
I am flattered but is it too early for him to be saying all these things? We've been dating 7 weeks....
Q. I have been dating a guy for about 7 weeks now. things have been really good and we get on so well. He works away mon-fri after getting a job promotion and is doing really well. He told me about his childhood and how traumatic it was.. His mum was ...
A. 5 October 2011: My husband and I fell in love at the very beginning and we've been together for 8 years already. It is not uncommon for people to feel a strong bond to one another, but after two days of sharing an attraction, my husband and I fell in love. It was ... (read in full...)
Does she regret what she did, does she miss me
Q. My gf and i broke up about 3 months ago.We dated for 3 years.She also has a 3 and a half year daughter,which i took as my own,because the childs father wanted nothing to do with them,he has never seen the child.She broke up with me to be with the ...
A. 3 October 2011: I agree completely with 19reginna84. Unfortunately a mother will always have feelings for the father of their children. Whether they be purely platonic or something more, her child's father will always be a present thought in her mind. I too am very ... (read in full...)
I met him on a trip, but after we got home he became distant. What happened?
Q. I met a guy while working in Alaska this summer. He'd been there for about 6 months and I was scheduled to be there for two. It was a really great opportunity for me to get out of my home town and away from all these people that I didn't like and ...
A. 3 October 2011: First of all, your behavior raises a huge red flag! I know you are concerned and are really fond of this guy, but as my husband puts it, you are "nagging" him! 1 day without hearing from someone is not a big deal. Remember, you are only dating--long ... (read in full...)
I'm only 15, if nothing's happened with a guy yet, will it ever?
Q. im 15 and i have not had any interact with a boy. ive never been kissed, or had a boyfriend or had sex. i get attention quite a bit from older men. but im worried that if i havent manged to do anything so far it will neverhappen. like i keep ...
A. 3 October 2011: You are too young to be worried about sex and boys. At 15, a female is just beginning to mature. You have plenty of time in the world to worry about these things. Do not ever think that you have to settle with someone. When you are ready to have ... (read in full...)
I have never been pursued by a guy.
Q. Through out high school, and now in college, I have watched my friends have guys coming up to them, flirting with them and getting their numbers. This has never happened to me and makes me feel extremely sad, unwanted and lonely. The only two guys I ...
A. 2 October 2011: Some guys are intimidated by pretty girls, and assume that they already have boyfriends so they don't even try to approach them in the first place. It is also possible that your friend told you you were pretty to not hurt your feelings, but a true ... (read in full...)
I'm regretting that I broke up with such a sweet girl
Q. I recently broke up with my girlfriend. We were together for almost 2 years. I felt I need to break up since i didnot want to be in a relationship right now. I have too many problems and want to work through them. I have been in a relationship since ...
A. 15 February 2011: Are you really regretting breaking up with her for the reasons you stated above, or are you regretting breaking up with her because of how she took it? Either way, two ears is a long time to spend in a relationship, and to end it by saying that "I ... (read in full...)
Girlfriend prefers having guys as friends rather than girls
Q. Hey guys, ill try to make this as short as posible. Me and my girlfriend (my first) have been dating for 9 months, we were friends for a few months before we started dating. We love each other to pieces, best thing in my life, and same with her. ...
A. 6 February 2011: It's completely normal for a girl to have nothing but guy friends. At least, it's normal for me. Almost all the females I know how only guy friends. My sister and I both had only guy friends growing up, only because from our experiences, girls can ... (read in full...)
It hurts when we make plans and then he blows me off
Q. ok sooo recently i've been sleeping over my bfs house a lot and he loves it. problem is he lives with his friends family. usually during the day he goes to work and we hang out later that night. lately in the morning he keeps telling me he wants to ...
A. 6 February 2011: I'm so sorry you're going through this, but I agree with metoo... about talking to him and letting him know how you feel.
Unfortunately, most guys need to be told what they're doing wrong. If you never bring it up to him, he'll never stop. An... (read in full...)
I'm pregnant but he wants to wait to have a baby!
Q. I'm 24 yrs old I've been with my boyfriend for 4 yrs and we are still going strong however I got pregnant and he doesn't want me to have it atm he wants to wait a few more years till he's out of med school ...
A. 6 February 2011: This is a sad situation, and no one can make this tough decision but you. My opinion though...he was man enough to get you pregnant, so he needs to be man enough to live up to his actions. Everyone forgets that having sex can come with conseq... (read in full...)
Tips for my first job interview?
Q. So not a relationship question but I don't really know anyone else I can ask. I have my first ever job interview on Wednesday, I'm speaking to the lady on the phone on Monday for her to tell me a little bit about the role. I've got the whole 'dr...
A. 5 February 2011: I took an entire class on this! I'm sure I can give you some pointers.
Try the following:
- Sit up straight
- Speak up, don't mumble
- Sound sure, don't question what you say, believe in what you say
- Keep your hair away from your face
- C... (read in full...)
I said I'd propose, but I'm not ready!
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for over a year now in a long distance relationship. There's about a 700km distance between us but we still manage to see each other nearly every month. Ever since we started going out, she's brought up engagement an...
A. 2 February 2011: If you can see yourself being together in the future, then try giving her a PROMISE RING. A promise ring symbolizes your final committment to her before an engagement. It's also a huge step, or at least it is in the US, although it is loosing ... (read in full...)
I can't masturbate unless I think of penis... and I'm male! Why is this?
Q. I am straight and male, but i cant masturbate unless I'm thinking about penis. Outside of masturbation, I love girls no guys at all, but when I maturbate that is all I think about. Why?...
A. 2 February 2011: I'm a female, and I love breasts! I'm happily married by the way, but when I have sex, I enjoy picturing them. Maybe it's more normal than we think???... (read in full...)
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