A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:okay so I would appreciate some good advice. I got into a relationship extremely quickly a couple of months ago, in hindsight I wish it wasn't as sudden as we didn't have time to get to know each other better.We argue quite frequently and have a few problems, I really like him a lot but I am not 'in love' with him, I love him as a person and he makes me so happy but I know in my heart there is a lot missing but I can't make it be there. I know he really likes me and each day I feel like I'm making him like me more and I don't want to hurt him in any way. I am really struggling as I enjoy being with him, spending time together, cuddling, kissing and other things BUT I know there is something missing but I don't know what it is. Would you suggest staying together to see if it gets better, or just break it off, but I truly like him alot but I understand I wouldn't be asking this if it was all okay. Thankyou.
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female
reader, tennisstar88  +, writes (17 December 2012):
 How did you two skip the honeymoon phase and enter the make it or break phase that fast?
Yes, every couple argues. Friends argue, family argues. It's life. However, if you two enter the relationship arguing all the time, it's not going to fix itself later down the road. There's no "it's going to get better". This is how it is between you two.
The missing part is you two aren't compatible. He's not who or what you thought he was. It's time to cut your losses on this relationship.
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (17 December 2012):
 You write: "....We argue quite frequently and...."
Arguing is NOT the basis of a "good" or "adequate" or "great" relationship. It IS what children do, on a school yard......
IF you would like to have an ADULT "relationship" then find someone with whom you can spend time... and NOT write about his and your "relationship"; "We argue quite frequently and..."
THAT's what life is about....
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, golddigger99 +, writes (16 December 2012):
 EVERY and I do mean EVERY couple argues. However, I agree with Red591, if you don't love him and don't see a possibility of you loving him, then you're just wasting your time and his.
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A
female
reader, Red591 +, writes (16 December 2012):
 I would talk to him and tell him something is missing. He may feel the same. You guys could also try and figure out what is missing and work on that together. However....if it simply that you are not in love with him then you need to let him find someone who will be or you are wasting his time and yours. There comes a point where you are leading someone on and not protecting them from pain. It hurts much worse when someone has invested more time on you
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