How do I undo the damage I did by keeping contact with my ex wife?
Q. I must have done everything wrong that I could do in regard to my ex-wife. Even though she is now in a rebound relationship with the man she was secretly seeing for several months. The affair has brought out the worst in me. I know I wasn't the one ...
A. 24 November 2010: i'm the original person who asked for advice/input and i thank you for posting/replying. it has been a trying experience for me as a person. i'm still a single parent, my children live with me. i am the sole provider for my family. my exwife still ... (read in full...)
Am I unreasonble feeling bad that she sees her ex's without letting me know?
Q. Hi, I would be grateful of objective view of my situation. I have been with my partner for 4 years. We are in our early 40s. My partner sees ex's of hers on a fairly regular basis. There are 5 that I know about. She has mostly male friends. I don't...
A. 1 July 2010: I don't think you're being unreasonable. You have a right to know where your Partner is, esp with an EX! my exwife secretly talked with her Ex and it was wrong and we argued over it. i stood my ground. we are no longer together but i realize now ... (read in full...)
How do I undo the damage I did by keeping contact with my ex wife?
Q. I must have done everything wrong that I could do in regard to my ex-wife. Even though she is now in a rebound relationship with the man she was secretly seeing for several months. The affair has brought out the worst in me. I know I wasn't the one ...
A. 3 May 2010: thanks for your response. I have been taking alot of similar advice regarding my Ex. trying to focus on myself now and my family. Ex has been trying to create friction with my kids and me. she still won't visit, still involved with her bf, the one ... (read in full...)
Should I forgive my ex and continute to hope she will come back to me one day?
Q. I love my ex, we were together for almost 4 years. We were always arguing for probably 6 months (which was 1 of the reasons to me getting depression). The problem mostly was we never gave each other space, especialy her as she in very clingy. It ...
A. 27 April 2010: It's strange how the human heart works. Ur Ex craved ur attention when u decided to cut off communication with her. I myself did the opposite. when i caught my ex cheating, I was so upset that i lashed out via facebook and texting idk how many times ... (read in full...)
Broke up with my boyfriend for another man who I later learn is married
Q. I m a 22 yr old undergraduate and had a normal lifestyle. I m considered simple and naive as describe by my peers . I have a boyfriend (aged 25)of 1 year plus but I was not very happy in this relationship. He treats me well but we often argue over...
A. 26 April 2010: what the other people say is dead on. you seem to be a great person with all kinds of men coming your way. consider this a painful test that will enable you to have a sense of these opportunistic guys that will do and say anything to get into your ... (read in full...)
Was the whole relationship just a lie?
Q. I had an affair with a married man, I myself am married. The affair lasted for 10 months, it started out as friends, and built into a trusting, wanting, and deep relationship. My marriage was already in trouble and I was just co-habitating with my ...
A. 19 April 2010: I am sorry for this mess you and your ex-lover have gotten into. Two lonely, needy halves don't always make a loving healthy whole. The two of you didn't get the needs met in both your relationships and the need for a parent to be a part of the ... (read in full...)
I'm addicted to a cold and selfish woman who lies, cheats and accuses me of everything! Advice?
Q. Did anyone, male or female, ever come across this type of partner? We are seperated now. She lies about an affair and when lies couldnt' work anymore, she went on the offensive and blamed me for 9 years of not loving her and meeting her needs. I...
A. 17 April 2010: thanks for your replies. I am still struggling with this woman. I am starting to believe that she is a Sociopath: no remorse, no guilt,no empathy, no regrets for choosing this man over her own family. she continues to use me as an excuse to not ... (read in full...)
Exposed my former wife's lies, but still unsure of my future
Q. I'm in my early stages of a breakup and I'm pretty sure i want to go forward from here. i will keep it in point form as it is a long history: recently found out that my partner has been seeing another man, was/am super pissed off. she denied i...
A. 17 April 2010: hi, thanks for ur posts. my ex still continues to play games, like she's the victim and i'm the guy who caused all of this. she only came to visit once since christmas and that was for barely a day and a half at easter holidays. i tried to ... (read in full...)
Should I tell my ex I still have feelings for him even though we split up 5 years ago?
Q. should i tell my old flame that i still have feelings for him, though we broke up 5 years ago. and there has been others after him?...
A. 17 April 2010: why do u still have feeling for him after all these years? just curious. I thought most women forget men they had relationships so long ago. thanks.... (read in full...)
Cheating wife problem. The trust is gone so what should I do - short and long term?
Q. I have written before, when my wife and I were going through a difficult time, and some of the answers and advice were really useful. This is my situation now: we have been married for nearly 16 years, we have 2 daughters, aged 10 and 14. Our ...
A. 12 April 2010: Your wife sounds like my Ex. She cheated on me a few times (that i know of). This last time I shut the door. our kids are with me, she is with her fellow cheater. it won't last very long as I hear their relationship is already strained at best. it's ... (read in full...)
I feel depressed, withdrawn and wish there was some way to make it work. But she cheated!
Q. My girlfriend and I have had problems from the start - 8 years ago and counting. I've read through several other posts and this may seem all to familiar, but I need some advice - I'm currently taking anxiety meds to try and cope. When I met her...
A. 3 April 2010: No offense, but your story reminds me of the man who had to sleep in the same bed as his wife and lover, and each time the two cheaters were having sex, the husband kept apologizing for taking too much space in the bed and snoring too loudly.
t... (read in full...)
No longer find husband attractive, and ended affair, I'm really hurting
Q. (MOD NOTE: 2 posts combined) I no longer find my husband physically attractive anymore. I married him aged 24 I am now 40 years old. The last time we had sex I hated every second of it. I have two children, and honestly feel I am now only with ...
A. 3 April 2010: I don't know if women are hardwired to be more selfish when it comes to affairs. My ex seemed to thrive on lies and deception, it seemed to feed the affair she was having. Now that I put her butt to the curb, I have our kids with me, she has a ... (read in full...)
An affair that has destroyed me
Q. *OP's own title* won't go into the details the affair lasted over a year. We were caught four months ago. My husband wants to fix our marraige I don't. All I CAN think about is this other man. Will I ever get over this. Feel so alone. My heart is...
A. 3 April 2010: I think any affair definitely creates very bad Karma and the pleasure taken from it doesn't match the tremendous pain that affects everyone involved. You are full of remorse but still hanging on to those feelings for him. You have to let them go via ... (read in full...)
How do I deal with this ex who won't let go?
Q. My ex girlfriend has called once or twice a week for the past 2 months (I caught her cheating, again, with the same guy), but I never returned her calls. She Emailed me a few times, even invited me on a week-long trip to LA (2 weeks ago), and I ...
A. 3 April 2010: I admire your sense of boundaries and sticking to your guns. this is why ur ex is probably going crazy. My ex is starting to realize that her affair, I said 'good luck' basically, is not the perpetual honeymoon she thought it would be. two months ... (read in full...)
My wife was cheating with her cousin!
Q. My wife cheated on me with her cousin. They had sex multiple times and she was staying at his house. This was all while she was on vacation visiting her family. She just started getting to know them all including her father. He ran out on her mother ...
A. 2 April 2010: Often times a woman, when caught, will lie about the details of the infidelity. If lies don't work, then she will resort to minimizing "only had sex once." It sounds like your wife is in this state of mind right now. Usually it means that she ... (read in full...)
Should I confront her and let destiny run its course?
Q. I'm in-love with my wife, she is my soul mate, the love of my life! We been married for 16 yrs and 13 yrs ago I caught her cheating on me, it broke my heart. She promise me that she would end the affair and begged me to stay I forgave her and took ...
A. 2 April 2010: thanks for your post. i've been in a similar situation recently. i confronted her when i found out and it still hurts. she was trying to lie and rationalize,'its your fault, u never loved me, blahblah..i believe she's being used, she has low self ... (read in full...)
My world fell apart when my husband started this affair...
Q. My world fell apart when my husband began an affair on the 23rd of December 2009. As far as I knew all was well! Its made harder by the fact the girl is everything he has ever tried to change about me.. she is a large girl who is covered in facial ...
A. 31 March 2010: Sounds like you are more then accomodating in your role. your husband seems to get his own way most times. If I were you, I would begin to focus on my self. pick up a book on codependency, it may open your eyes. my guess is he's hoping you'll stick ... (read in full...)
Sleeping with a broken heart...
Q. Hello, Here's my situation: i found out through myspace that my boyfriend of 3 years has been cheating with an ex girlfriend for the past year. when confronted, he denied it so i confronted her and found out it was true. when he found out i talk...
A. 29 March 2010: I confronted my cheating wife's other man, and the same thing happened. she was furious. he was furious that his affair may be exposed. the coward kept pressuring me to leave him alone, calling me every name she could think of. I told them both that ... (read in full...)
She wants to end our affair to pursue a family life.
Q. Internally I'm going crazy! I've been holding this stuff inside for nearly 4 years without sharing it with anyone, and it is eating me up inside. I'm married, and I'm having an affair with a woman I met several years ago. We met innocently enoug...
A. 29 March 2010: the thing is, your wife has probably seen your warts and unwashed laundry thru the years,whereas your lover has only seen you on your best behavior, so far. it's unfair to your wife that she shoulder the burden of being a wife and mother, while your ... (read in full...)
He was a cheating man so I dropped him...did I do the right thing?
Q. I have been involved with a man now for 6 years and have known all along that there were things he was concealing from me but you know how it goes I bring it up he denies everything. So for awhile I leave things alone until the other day I call...
A. 29 March 2010: we hate to admit it, but there are people out there who are so insecure that they have to have a lifeline just in case one relationship doesn't work, there's always plan b. congrats for choosing that you are better then anybody's plan b.... (read in full...)
I feel unloved, both by my hubby and by the guy I had an affair with
Q. I am married and started seeing a married man. A little bit of history... I knew him back when I was 16 (he was 21) and we worked together. He never lead on like he liked me, of course I would catch him looking at me. I totally was crushing on ...
A. 28 March 2010: First off, the crack using issue raises a big red flag. Idk if this current marriage will every work out unless his demons are addressed first, then counselling should be considered if you decide if your marriage is worth saving. I know there are ... (read in full...)
I just found out my wife has been having an affair for 4 - 5 years and am devastated!
Q. I am a 56 year old man who has just found out that my wife of 36 years this year has been having an affair with one man for the past 4-5 years. I am absolutely devasted as one can imagine. My love for her is so strong that I rang her and asked her ...
A. 28 March 2010: I found out my partner of many years has been cheating, I don't know how long as she is trying to rationalize it so she will feel less guilt (I left you, you just didnt' know it, you cheated on me first 17 years ago, you never loved me). We have ... (read in full...)
He says my vagina is too tight. Is that good or bad?
Q. My guy and I have been together for a while. We just recently had a conversation about our sex life and he says that my Pussy is too tight. He enjoys himself, I am always wet enough, my hygine is great, but I'm too tight. I am 27 years old and all ...
A. 28 March 2010: if he complains about your pussy being too tight, there are millions of us guys out thre who would gladly take his place and treat your pussy like it should be treated and worshipped. his hell would be my heaven.... (read in full...)
Help - what do I do if he comes back to me??
Q. Just a little bit of help please, I was seeing a man for 4 months last year (he had separated from his wife and living apart). I totally fell for him as did he me. They have 2 children, aged 3 and 6. To cut a long story short, his wife, who is...
A. 28 March 2010: good for you for being this strong so far. he will probably try to contact you to see if you are a still a lifeline, in case it doesn't work out with his wife. a man who is obviously still has strong ties with his wife, and the ties are even ... (read in full...)
We started dating too soon after she broke up with her ex!
Q. I've dated a girl who is still getting over difficult relationship. Shes been with someone for a year and both were expected to get married, but out of the blue, he left her and that was it. 3 months later, we started going out. It went well, but ...
A. 28 March 2010: the woman is still to wrapped up in her ex that you don't really stand a chance, no matter who great you are or how great you treated her. she'll be always thinking of her ex and no matter how well you've treated her, she's probably already told her ... (read in full...)
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