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*ateadonut

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I split with my husband 3 months ago due to him cheating on me but I cant seem to move on and it still hurts so bad...

Q.   Why can't I move on, why is the pain still so raw? I split with my husband 3 months ago due to him cheating on me. I want to be able to move on, I want to smile again so why can't I. I still love him and wish I didn't because he as changed so much ...

A.   24 July 2011: It's really great that you're working through it. It's nice to see you looking for support. I guess maybe your friends are tired of hearing about it, and it's probably time for you to stop talking to them about it except every once in a while. It ... (read in full...)

My husband is away, I've noticed some changes!

Q.   Husband is away, noticed changes. We've been married 9+ years and have an 8y.o. My husband has left the country because of immigration reasons. He hadn't been back to his country for 14 years. He has been gone for 3 months. Before he left h...

A.   24 July 2011: My wife and I are like this when one of us is in another country. At first we will call a lot, then not at all. It is very normal, for us at least.... (read in full...)

Ladies, could I have your opinion? Is she interested in me or is it something else?

Q.   I have been out of the dating game for quite a bit of time now and recently decided to jump back in. As a guy I seem to find it fairly difficult to read the signs of a female. I met this girl a couple of weeks ago and we started to talk on and o...

A.   19 July 2008:  yeah. she likes you. kiss her to see if i'm right and get back to us. ... (read in full...)

People say I can get any guy I want but..

Q.   I can never get a real boyfriend. It seems like I can only sleep with any guy I want, but I dont want that. I want a relationship but guys just want me for sex and nothing else. I dont get it Im tall, thin (people say I look like a model) smart and ...

A.   19 July 2008:  Maybe you should try finding a charitable organization to volunteer your time. You might find someone in church or through your parents' friends. Do you have a habit of flirting? Maybe you're giving the wrong signals, also. ... (read in full...)

How do I pick up strange women I don't know?

Q.   For the majority of my teenage years I was obese so I never had much luck with women. Then during college I started working out, lost a ton of weight, now I look pretty good. I've only had one girlfriend. I was wondering if any of you guys had ...

A.   19 July 2008:  I have to disagree with pinktopaz. Don't offer to buy a woman a drink until you've found that you like her. You don't want to send the wrong signals to the wrong woman. Also, if you're at a bar to meet a woman, I don't think you should drink... (read in full...)

How can I lose a large amount of weight without it being unsafe?

Q.   Hi, this is my 1st time on this website and i'm asking for help... I'm classed as obese (BMI = 31.2) and i don't want to be anymore. All i want to know is how can i get into the 'normal' weight section on BMI... i would prefer it to be fast as i ...

A.   19 July 2008:  Great advice here from the other two. I just want to direct you to a good website: http://www.exrx.net Here's a part that shows a study about weight training compared to aerobics for fat loss: http://www.exrx.net/FatLoss/W... (read in full...)

I need some advice on the girl on top position! Any tricks I should know?

Q.   Just wondering how a girl should move when on top during sex, I feel like i'm not very good, even though my boyfriend tells me I am. Is there any tricks to it? different ways of thrusting or positioning to make it easier for me, I have trouble ...

A.   19 July 2008: it's ok to change your position when you need to. sit on him like you're sitting on your knees, and try moving back and forth instead of up and down. personally, i like the feeling of her thighs rubbing on my hips, and my penis still slides b... (read in full...)

Please help me lose weight!

Q.   Right now I am having a very hard time to lose weight. I keep on wanting to lose weight but it doesn't seem to work out. The main problem is I keep on craving for food. If I don't get those cravings out, I go crazy and it makes me want it more. So I ...

A.   19 July 2008: Here's another part that shows a study about weight training compared to aerobics for fat loss: http://www.exrx.net/FatLoss/WT%26End.html And here's a page with this quote: "Weight training intensity also seems to be the key component for fa... (read in full...)

Please help me lose weight!

Q.   Right now I am having a very hard time to lose weight. I keep on wanting to lose weight but it doesn't seem to work out. The main problem is I keep on craving for food. If I don't get those cravings out, I go crazy and it makes me want it more. So I ...

A.   19 July 2008:  Lifting heavy weights is the best way to lose weight. A study by the University of California showed that dieting alone only leads to short term weight loss, and no significant fat loss. 2 years after starting a diet, dieters were FATTER than ... (read in full...)

I lied and now I think I'm in love with a guy, but I'm married!

Q.   I am a married woman who has found love over the internet. I lied about my marital status, what should I do? I have been married for 10 years, and we have 2 daughters together. My husband is a great father and provider for our family, but we j...

A.   19 July 2008:  Your responsibility is to your family, not to your "self" or to your "happiness". Generous people are happy; selfish people are always striving to find their own "happiness". Your feelings should be kept private, especially from the object o... (read in full...)

How do I pick up strange women I don't know?

Q.   For the majority of my teenage years I was obese so I never had much luck with women. Then during college I started working out, lost a ton of weight, now I look pretty good. I've only had one girlfriend. I was wondering if any of you guys had ...

A.   19 July 2008:  "Hi," is a good starting point. "I saw you and I just wanted to talk to you," is a good second. Feeling nervousness as excitement instead is good. Not drinking is a good idea, if you're in a bar. Drinking will only give you something to c... (read in full...)

I embraced Christianity, but I still have the urge to be a swinger. Can anyone help me?

Q.   Wow this is scary, but I just thought it would be easier then going to a counselor or something. Before I gave my heart to Christ, my very beautiful and yes sexy wife and I played around with the thoughts of swinging. After we be came Christian we ...

A.   17 July 2008:  Oxytocin is a kind of chemical they can inject directly into a rat's brain to make them monogamous. Maybe you can get a syringe of it and inject it into your brain. Also, I think if you google it, the keywords like "oxytocin" or "monogamous ... (read in full...)

We broke up because we fight a lot, but could it work?

Q.   Hi, I just had a break up, my boyfriend and I were together for 2 years. We still have feelings for each other,but we have been fighting a lot. I have now figured out that the fighting has mostly but not always been because of me. I am insecure and ...

A.   17 July 2008:  Did you ever read the book, "Men are from Mars; Women are from Venus"? You both should read that book.... (read in full...)

I'm in love with my best friend and she tells me her sorrows. The pain just pierces my heart. I can't stand it any longer.

Q.   I'm in love with my best friend.she's dating someone else which really hurts me. But now her boyfriend went to another country, she told me about her sorrows which actually hurts me too. Now she's single and i don't wanna talk to her and meet her. ...

A.   17 July 2008:  How long have you known this girl? How long have you been in love with her? Without having all the information, I think you better kiss her. If she kisses back, great. If not, you're going to have to deal with letting go.... (read in full...)

What pet names can you call a guy?

Q.   A guy calls you 'baby, huni, sexy.' But what can you call a guy? ...

A.   17 July 2008:  I think couples start calling each other "Mommy" and "Daddy" after they have kids, because they're setting an example of what their kids should call their other half... then it becomes habit.... (read in full...)

Is this normal that he doesn't really call me?

Q.   I've been with (lets say) Max for almost 4 months. For the past month and half our relationship has been long distance. I'm eventually meeting Max in end of August. When Max was here, we had such an amazing relationship and now that Max is gone, he ...

A.   17 July 2008:  Sometimes my current wife has to leave for a few months at a time. I don't really like to talk on the phone, so I don't call much. I email her sometimes. I email her every day if I feel like she appreciates it. Are you with him? He's coming ... (read in full...)

How do I make him understand that overt flirtations and his forgetting my feelings is wrong. Or should I pretend nothing is happening?

Q.   I have been married for 23 years. Last year, I found that my husband had been texting and emailing a colleague (and she had responded over 200 times) with extremely explicit sexual language - It read as though they were having an affair - even ...

A.   14 July 2008: i really like justgirl's answer. i've noticed just recently that when i have the desire to flirt with other women, it always has something to do with my wife, like i feel that she doesn't like me, or something else... it makes me need affectio... (read in full...)

I've always been close to my cousin, but now he seems to be jealous of my boyfriend. What's with him?

Q.   So i have always been close with my cousin, even since we were babies we were born 3 days apart. We hang out all the time, staying at eachothers houses stuff like that. He is my best friend i can always rely on him and vice versa. But recently h...

A.   13 July 2008:  A boy friend and girl friend of mine started liking each other. I got jealous of both of them because they hung out with me less. Point being, he could be jealous over just losing a friend.... (read in full...)

The Understanding Male Species...or not?

Q.   After reading several of the replies submitted by Agony Uncles here on Dear Cupid, I have come to realise, or should I say, believe, that the majority of them are really very sympathetic, kind, loving, caring ~ but most of all understanding. But ...

A.   13 July 2008:  Sometimes I'll deliberately ignore someone who wants my attention; it's because you don't know whose real - my thoughts wander back to being a kid and having a girl flirt with me just to bolster her self-esteem. So, you might get a lot of the s... (read in full...)

I've always been close to my cousin, but now he seems to be jealous of my boyfriend. What's with him?

Q.   So i have always been close with my cousin, even since we were babies we were born 3 days apart. We hang out all the time, staying at eachothers houses stuff like that. He is my best friend i can always rely on him and vice versa. But recently h...

A.   12 July 2008:  A boy friend and girl friend of mine started liking each other. I got jealous of both of them because they hung out with me less. Point being, he could be jealous over just losing a friend.... (read in full...)

I was going to be a father, but she aborted the child...how can I not hate her for what she has done??

Q.   I don't know how to deal with her or this pain. I was going to be a daddy. That was taken from me. The child was too young for me to know the sex but I felt it was a boy, I don’t know why but I do. We were about one month pregnant when we broke up, ...

A.   12 July 2008: anonymous writer right below me: yeah. i agree. i think roe v wade was about 4th amendment rights - like, the government can't possibly know if someone's pregnant, so they can't stop the crime. (Actually, I just looked it up, they site the... (read in full...)

A married man has said he is interested in me, and I am interested in him...

Q.   Hi All A married man wants me to have an affair with him. He told me he was married straight away and that the decison was mine to make. I really liked him instantly and thats never happend to me before. I know that it's wrong but i dont think i c...

A.   12 July 2008: did you ever hear the beach boys song, "here today": "A brand new love affair is such a beautiful thing But if youre not careful think about the pain it can bring It makes you feel so bad It makes your heart feel sad It makes your days go... (read in full...)

How can I make myself become more independent and dismiss these fears?

Q.   How can I make myself become more independent? I am a female. And I realise that I have less passion for the learning and work than the men . I think about a boyfriend ,and a family ,even a baby even that I want to be a housewife. However ,I a...

A.   12 July 2008:  I guess this is a very common fear. In China, I think everyone gets married when they are 27 or 28, and if you get married earlier, you were young, and if you get married when you're 30 or older, everyone is amazed at how old you were when yo... (read in full...)

Why doesn't he show that he cares??

Q.   Im 15, He's 16. We like each other, but were not going out just yet. We are on the verge of going out though. Im totally unexperienced, and he is experienced, he has had sex more than once, and i haven't gone out with a guy, i haven't even kis...

A.   30 June 2008: he's a player.... (read in full...)

How am I going to get through the next few months working with this married man?

Q.   Hi, I recently met a guy through work... He is actually working with me for the summer and we immediatly got on like a house on fire, which is great as he is from abroad and we will be basically with each other 24/7 until September... We have so ...

A.   29 June 2008: I'm married and sometimes having girl friends (notice the space) sucks. Here's my rules: 1) No drinking. 2) I'm not allowed at anyone's house and they're not allowed at mine.... (read in full...)

"Oh, i'll just have to take somebody else with me and send you a post card"...What should I do about him?

Q.   Last week my boyfriend with whom i have lived with for 3 months asked me to go away on holiday with him at Christmas. I said yes and now he wants £2000 from me to go snow boarding with him, which i do not have. I told him that i do not have that kind...

A.   29 June 2008: that's a lot of money. why don't you just call angela on his phone and ask her what's up? be friendly though. she might not even know what's going on. (also, i've had women's numbers in my phone who i didn't really know and wasn't interest... (read in full...)

I think my cousin was flirting with my boyfriend! What's going on here?

Q.   my boyfriend and i had plans for this weekend but my cousin came down and those plans were trashed...so i jus invited him over to watch a movie with me but little did i know my sis and my cousin was in there the whole time so we had no privacy what ...

A.   29 June 2008: Something that someone is holding is more attractive than something sitting on a desk. Do you have more friends? Bring your cousin and sister out with your boyfriend and some more boys, attractive ones. See what happens and let us know.... (read in full...)

What do you think about my husband's leaving because I was not able to bear a pregnancy?

Q.   i am 36, i am not capable of bearing a child anymore for a uterus problem. my husband had left me for another woman for a reason that he wants to have a child. do you think he didn't love me anymore because he exchange me for a reason to have a ...

A.   29 June 2008: I can't imagine anything better than my children. I love my children WAY more than I love my wife, my self, or anything else. Before I get any objections about common-sense parenting, let me just express this as my rating on love: if my wife die... (read in full...)

If I continue like this at 15, will it affect me when I get older?

Q.   Im 15 and usually cum about once a day. If i continue this at this age will it affect me when I get older? Like when I want kids and that?...

A.   29 June 2008: no. you'll be fine. i once masturbated 5 times in one day, though, after the 4th time, my boner wouldn't go away. it was painful. based on that, i'd say three times at most. also, if you're going to masturbate that much in a day, use baby oil... (read in full...)

I like her so much that no matter how hard I try, I can't get her off my mind. Please advise me if you can.

Q.   I don't know what to do. I like this girl on a level that i have never felt before. She has a boyfriend and she knows i like her. We get along so well and she has told me that i am the only person that brings out the best in her. I once acce...

A.   29 June 2008: You might google the phrase "libidinal interest", but look for it in respect to the limbic system and stress reduction. also, try to make an "observer" in your mind. there should be two people in there. one who does things and one who sees you... (read in full...)

We split up, and he wants to see me again,should I? I'm still in love with him

Q.   My ex and I broke up about 6 months ago. We were together about two years and things ended pretty rough. Anyhow now we are both dating other people and I haven't heard from him in about a month, but I got online tonight as he asked if I would like ...

A.   29 June 2008: You could be falling into a trap. Men and women tend to really fall for the one who is aloof with their feelings for him/her. That's the only danger. If you can't handle it, don't go.... (read in full...)

I was too shy and bottled a good chance with the girl of my dreams!

Q.   Hi all. First off i'd like to say how much i like this site. I've been reading here since 2005 and posted a few questions in the past, it's addictive reading! Anyway i wondered if you could help me with a situation i have, i'll try not to make this...

A.   29 June 2008: Hey, I have some advice that's a little against what BigSis gave you. If you know her like you do, you shouldn't have to say, "I hope you don't mind..." Women usually like men. Even when you get married (like I am), your wife isn't going to... (read in full...)

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