| Latest articles: How to keep a marriage ticking
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
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22 September 2010: Marriage in itself is one of the strongest words to exist. It comprises of a whole new chapter in your life. It brings about a change in your life which nothing else can. You have so many aspirations and dreams about the right guy for yourself. Some ...
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Am I bored with him or intimacy or both?
Q. So, I've been with my boyfriend for two years and for the past few months i've noticed i'm never "in the mood", we used to be sooo intimate at the start of our relationship and it was great and now the thought actually makes me feel negative. We've ...
A. 11 February 2014: If you are not enjoying intimacy with him, you got to first answer yourself, if you are enjoying emotional stuffs with him? Do you look forward to meeting him, spending time with him? If the answer to that is no as well, then you surely need a break ... (read in full...)
He acts like he likes me but says he doesn't. Was he lying?
Q. I think he lied to me. I have known this guy for about 4 years, and we had to spend a bit of time together for work. Anyway, so he is naturally flirty, all the girls like him, and I do too, he's a bit cocky to be honest, and knows he's hot. Anyw...
A. 29 January 2014: I think just push back. I am not sure if he was lying, but it sounds like he was quiet interested in you till you kept your distance. The moment you gave him some response back, he backed out. Maybe he is scared of commitments. In which case, it ... (read in full...)
Is he interested in me or does he only like me as a friend?
Q. I met this guy a few weeks ago. We clicked because we are both majoring in music and we both are passionate about art and enjoy deep conversations. I love how intelligent and creative he is and he's open about his feelings and that's refreshing to ...
A. 29 January 2014: I think dont jump into conclusions so soon. I would say that he is flowing with the flow for now. So probably you may use the same approach. This position is quite risky for both of you. Either of you could fall for each other while the other may ... (read in full...)
How do I leave my violent husband?
Q. I have been with my husband for 8 years and we have 4 young children together. My husband has always had a bad temper and drinks excessively, but both have gotten worse over the years. He screams and swears at me at least once a day for something ...
A. 23 January 2014: Hi,
Well you are in a very difficult situation my dear friend. No matter how much I understand, it is not enough. I think you must act quite immediately. If you have a violent husband like him, I do not think you should stay with him. He is harm... (read in full...)
He's been using the word 'love' in our chats, should I tell him I've noticed or just carry on as normal?
Q. hi just a quick one, been here before, just need a little advise on what to do, my man, who i have been with for over a year and half, and we are in LDR, but we are fully committed do all a LDR does, he has a bit of a hard time telling me his ...
A. 7 October 2010: Since he is quite shy and inexpressive of his feelings, I think its better not to tell him. That might make him conscious and he might stop saying so. Id suggest just enjoy this feeling for now...If it increases,and he uses it more often than just ... (read in full...)
I'm not confused anymore, but have I done too much damage?
Q. hi guys, iv got a problem....i caused it though, but want help getting my ex bf back! I broke up with my ex 3 weeks ago, just before my birthday, he gave me presents and spoilt me rotten..then i dumped him...i offered to give his presents back, b...
A. 7 October 2010: Well I guess, yes a lotof damage has been done. Now if you are sure you want him back, probably make efforts to win him back. Impress him with surprises, gift him nice stuffs, talk to him, spend more and more time with him, make him believe you have ... (read in full...)
Anytime my boyfriend seems withdrawn, I start worrying and feeling insecure!
Q. I've always believed an unconditional, stable kind of love was the real basis of a good relationship. But my ex was different; I could say something silly which he disapproved of and then I'd have to work for weeks to win back his "love". Now ...
A. 1 October 2010: First and foremost, you will have to tell yourself that this relationship is a new beginning in your life, and nothing to do from past. You can learn good things from your past relationships but not bad. So if you had to face this guy who was always ... (read in full...)
Boyfriend beating me--is there any safe way out of this?
Q. Ok, so I've been with this guy for 3 years, and he's been hitting me for a while now. A long time actually. After we were together for only 6 months he started to hit and it has continued these past three years. I had the option of course, like ...
A. 27 September 2010: The sfest way is to leave the house. When he is not home, just leave from there.. Call your friends who you can live with for few days, see if you can change your city for sometime. Just go away from this guy. There is absolutely no reason why you ... (read in full...)
This guy doesn't talk to me ever since we kissed.
Q. Hi, I'm a Chinese girl my family came to the States 2 years ago for my father's work and stuff. It took me a while to fit in this country but now I'm doing quite well. I'm in highschool and I have a big crush on this guy and I really want to make it ...
A. 25 September 2010: I think you should just stay casual and wait for him to approach you. If he has been avoiding you, then probably he thinks kissing you was a mistake, which was just such a lovely feeling for you. So I guess you just be calm and relaxed, which I know ... (read in full...)
I like this girl, but her brother is a good friend
Q. I am 25 years old and I like this girl that is also 25 years old. I would like to ask her out but there is one problem. Her brother, who is 21 years, is one of my best friends. We played football in high school (I was a senior and he was a fre...
A. 24 September 2010: It would be best to first talk out to your friend, and be open about it. Speak to him about how he thinks of this,and before you proceed with this girl, it would be better if you check with your friend. Your friend will also appreciate your honesty. ... (read in full...)
He doesn't understand me!
Q. Hi. I have been together with this boy for 1 and half years. I love him truly with all my heart. However, I feel so hurt at times because I feel that nowadays, his friends are more important than me. He misses me a lot only when he is alone. I refer ...
A. 24 September 2010: Well,
First thing is first, by just breaking up with him, you wont bring a bad name on you. If a relationship is not working for you, its not working for you.......period. You should not get into rights and wrongs for public image if you do not w... (read in full...)
How to keep a marriage ticking
Q. Marriage in itself is one of the strongest words to exist. It comprises of a whole new chapter in your life. It brings about a change in your life which nothing else can. You have so many aspirations and dreams about the right guy for yourself. Some ...
A. 23 September 2010: Yes I completely agree with you here....a very valid point!!!... (read in full...)
I know he is cheating on me with another girl but I cant let go of him, especially after we lost our baby....
Q. Hi im a 24 year old girl i met this guy in varsity, we were friends for a year and on our second year we started to have sex until i bcame pregnant. he told me he wanted nothing to do with the pregnancy but the child did not survive. he came back we ...
A. 22 September 2010: You will have to let him go. He does not seem to be a good person at all. If you do not want to lose touch with him, you will continue to be in pain and stress. Probably you can start with reducing calls and all. As it is your calls is just once ... (read in full...)
How do I start talking to him to get this started? I'm not used to making the first move!
Q. A couple weeks ago my best guy friend went out to a bar with one of his friends from highschool who is pretty hot I suppose (we'll call him drew). At the bar drew had asked my friend if he had a chance with me. The news got back to me and I was ...
A. 22 September 2010: Maybe you can suggest your friend to simplify things for him. Since drew checked with your friend if he has a chance with you, you can ask him to communicate a yes. Maybe then Drew can himself take a first move. Also, you can ask your friend to ... (read in full...)
I proposed but she broke up with me!
Q. i had a relationship with girl,I have loved her more than any one can imagine,the greatness of that love has suffered me even i was with her, it was a love out of control,i can not really descirbe how it has been.I told my parents about fiancing ...
A. 22 September 2010: Hey,
I can feel your pain from all that you have written. Its really sad and unfortunate she left. But I would say,it was not her fault. She was honest with you. Maybe it ended at the right time. She was not looking for a furture with you, and... (read in full...)
I need my girlfriend to grow up!
Q. I'm with this girl, and I don't say girl because she's a child, but because she's immature. We have a child together. Even before the child she was immature. We also JUST moved into an apartment together. We've been together for about 2 years as ...
A. 22 September 2010: You will have to talk to her out. There is no way apart from a mature conversation with her. Tell her how you feel about things. Tell her, it hurts you to see the house in a mess or that she cant take care of their child alone. Tell her she needs to ... (read in full...)
How do I keep our friendship from falling apart?
Q. My friend who i have been friends with for 3 years now, has just left my school. shes only going to another school at the other end of my town, but I'm going to really miss her! We've been best friends through out. But the thing is the new school ...
A. 21 September 2010: Hey, Dont be so sure shell change. Even if she has gone to school different from yours, she has her own set of values and her parents. Her basic nature will remain the same. So its not necessary for everyone to get affected by bad surroundings. I ... (read in full...)
My ex contacted me again - should I get back in touch with him or not?
Q. My ex just contacted me after having broken up with me for 2 months. We were together for just two months as well, but at the beginning the feeling were incredibly strong. He said he lost feelings for me. That he liked me and still cared about me ...
A. 21 September 2010: hey, well I completely understand your confusion. But you are right, if you start responding, things may start again, and it might lead you to build false hopes. But no doubt its a good sign he wrote to you. Probably if you want, you can just s... (read in full...)
Embarrassed by my father's affair!
Q. My dad has been having an affair for the last 6 months to a year and has now asked my stepmom (whom I am very close with) for a divorce after 18 years of marriage. To make it worse my dad is 59 and his the girl he has been having an affair is 32 ...
A. 21 September 2010: hey, please dont take any decision in anger.... It is never correct. Even if you want to end your relationship with your father, you may do that, but once you are in calm mind. Let your anger cool, take some deep breath, take your time and then de... (read in full...)
I never wanted to marry so young but I have come to accept my situation, but my husband is making life difficult plus there is another man......
Q. Yes... Mine was arranged marriage.. And I never wanted to marry so early... After marriage I realize that this is life and I have to live like this.. But... People are around me, they are not leaving me to live my life happy... Including my hus...
A. 20 September 2010: A mens mentality at the age of 30 is.....sex. My apologies to be blunt, but I am not too sure if his intentions can be judged by his age. But yes a man at this age could be desperate. Dont show him your vulnerable side, he may want to take advantage ... (read in full...)
My marriage is falling apart after only 2 and a half years!
Q. i have been married for only two years and a half.but my marriage is already falling apart.we fight and we also physical fight.he looks at other when i ask him he tells me hes admiring their beauty.is he the right man for me.because i think am ...
A. 20 September 2010: hey,
what are the reasons of the fight if I may ask? Why do you guys using physical action to fight? It should only be verbal. Please think of days when things were fine between you guys and try to figure out what went wrong and where. If he tells... (read in full...)
Did I love him or did I just want to be in a relationship?
Q. i just broke up with my bf and i dont feel sad. I'm 18 and im really attractive but i've never had a bf before him. We had been together for five months and he was my first bf. he is the most perfect guy ever, he is sweet, sensitive, smart, funny, ...
A. 20 September 2010: Hey,
If you didnt feel sad or anything inside to see him crying, maybe you did like him but liking was not sufficient to be termed as love. I think when you are in love, you would not ask anyone of it. You would know yourself what these feelings... (read in full...)
Embarrassed by my father's affair!
Q. My dad has been having an affair for the last 6 months to a year and has now asked my stepmom (whom I am very close with) for a divorce after 18 years of marriage. To make it worse my dad is 59 and his the girl he has been having an affair is 32 ...
A. 20 September 2010: Hey,
I completely understand your feelings, and I dont think you are mishandling it. Its extremely difficult to imagine your dad cheating on his wife. Somewhere for all of us, our fathers are our ideals. We look upto them, and if we see them doi... (read in full...)
Feel insecure in a long distance relationship
Q. Hello. I'm a 25-year-old girl in Asia and I've been dating my 24-year-old European boyfriend since February. Now, we're in a long distance relationship because he has gone back to his country to finish his school and it's been two months. (Sorry, I ...
A. 20 September 2010: Well yes you are insecure in this relationship. But long distance relationships are difficult to trust. Specially when you did have an incident in front of you which is diffcult to be put off.
It is quite difficult to trust him, and anyone woul... (read in full...)
I've fallen for a guy who's in a 6 year relationship... help!
Q. ok so i am 21 years old and i am really attracted to this guy, but he has a girlfreind.. i know all of you would be like forget him, he is committed i agree and i have tried not liking him but i cant.. i am drawn to him every time i pull back.. this ...
A. 20 September 2010: hey,
these feelings are quite natural....specially when even the guy is responsive....since his gf is not in the same town...he can easily text u, call you etc....but this is increasing ur liking for him....if u really want to get over him, you... (read in full...)
My husband cheated and got the girl pregnant
Q. I am a woman that has been married for 3 years just found out that my husband may have a son. I will not leave him but we are both trying to deal with the problem i personally think it was a trap for him because he was being stupid its not ok he ...
A. 20 September 2010: Hi,
I think its good for you to say you wont cheat on him. Cheating on your spouse is one of the biggest sin to commit, and just because your partner committed this sin dosent mean youll do the same.
But I am really glad to see you dont want to... (read in full...)
27, a virgin and a social recluse. How can I meet women/date?
Q. Hello, I am a 27 year old virgin, and to make things worse I am a social recluse and unable to ask out women or even flirt with them. I have recently decided to go back to university for a second masters degree to help me change my career direct...
A. 17 September 2010: Hey,
Well its not all that bad to be 27 and still a virgin. Please dont let yourself or anyone pity you for your status. Dont let anyone think you are unhappy being single or anything. Feel good about yourself first to make others feel good abo... (read in full...)
Trying to get my degree but found out I am pregnant! What should I do?
Q. I really don't know what to do. I am 22 in nov. and i recently got engaged and my fiance is in the army and i live in new york state and he is stationed in washington state. I am afraid that i might be pregnant, and i don't know what to do. I'm ...
A. 17 September 2010: Hey,
See the positive side of it. Your fiance cares about you. He is ready to move to fort drum which is extremely close you. I am not too sure if you can continue with your studies from fort drum,? But If you can, nothing like it. Pregnanc... (read in full...)
We're long distance dating..so how do I know he's still into me?
Q. Hi there! I'm 25 yrs old and i need a baby i'm working and my bf also working,but when i tell him, he says he's not ready to have a baby now mybe 2011,i think he's says this because he is no longer interested in me,yestarday was my birth day he only ...
A. 17 September 2010: hey,
After reading your question, I am not sure if you are married to your boyfriend? Do you want a baby with him before marriage?
I think at this point in time when you are not even sure if he is loyal to you or he is into you, this would n... (read in full...)
Should I just walk away? How do you turn off your feelings?
Q. I posted on here a while back and got some great advice. I was seeing a co-worker, but the relationship came to an end and she went back to her ex who was abusive. She stopped having anything to do with me and it got to the point that we didn't e...
A. 17 September 2010: Hey,
I went through what you have written here.
To start with, Ill say that I do understand its natural for you to still worry about her, even when you know how she is. Its human for us to feel for someone. Infact id say you can give yoursel... (read in full...)
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