A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I'm a Chinese girl my family came to the States 2 years ago for my father's work and stuff. It took me a while to fit in this country but now I'm doing quite well. I'm in highschool and I have a big crush on this guy and I really want to make it work with him. Since lots of people here tells me I look like Kelly Hu or Jamie Chung(I heard she was in the movie 'sorrority row', for some of you who's not familiar) and my girlfriends told me about how guys in school checks me out all the time, I think I'm kind of good looking. And I've had quite a lot of boyfriends. But the thing is, most of them were black/hispanic/asian (nothing offensive about the race) and this guy I'm in right now is white. And he is not just a white boy, he's the quarterback, and everyone seems to vote for him for prom king, and of course he looks just so hot. But it's not his popularity or reputation or appearance that I like, it's that he is really sweet and a total family guy. I know that because he told me a lot about his private stories about his family after we've done some school projects together and we are really close than he is with other girls I think. We had a lot more in common than I ever expected and I was totally surprised that a guy like that is not at all shallow. Because I always thought of a guy like that as a jock with no brain. Anywayz... as far as I know every girl he's dated were white girls, most of them blondes. I know that some white guys feel insecure when they don't get to date white girls, but I don't think he is that kind. And one thing I'm sure is he has feelings for me too, cuz he kissed me the last time we hung out after school. And it was not just a quick short kiss but a really long french sort of thing. But after that, we've never had a chance to talk or even bump into each other, or maybe he's hiding from me to avoid what we did? It's been almost 4 days and I'm dying!! OH, and I'm pretty positive he's not a player, and a lot of other girls agreed. I hope this has nothing to do with race but I'm worried if it were. I can't believe how desperate I am! I've never fell so deeply for a guy like this before and I'm so worried he'd break my heart. Should I go talk to him first? And if I did, what do I have to talk about? or should I just wait until he comes up to me? God help me!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, misLadYd..  +, writes (25 September 2010):
 wow!maybe the kiss was bad.but just to clear things up,go talk to him.hear frm him whats up and dnt sound desperate.be open about how you feel
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 September 2010): Hey there,
I think that race is not an important issue nowadays and I dont think this guy has been avoiding your for your race. I dont think that he has feelings for you, because if he did he would express the joy of the kiss. I dont mean to be harsh but he kissed you in a moment of lust or a moment of attraction after the vibes you gave him, while after that realizing that it was a mistake. My point of view only and I hope im wrong. Take care of yourself and concentrate on studying more because these are just passing relations for a high school students .. the real thing comes later .. ask an expert:)
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A
female
reader, Priyanka09  +, writes (25 September 2010):
 I think you should just stay casual and wait for him to approach you. If he has been avoiding you, then probably he thinks kissing you was a mistake, which was just such a lovely feeling for you. So I guess you just be calm and relaxed, which I know is not easy...but still.. I think let him take the first move.
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A
male
reader, KidfromLA93 +, writes (25 September 2010):
I am foreign too and i get it a lot that i am attractive too and they say i look like some guy from twilight , and i moved to the U.S 3 years ago , i can relate to your situation. Let me tell you something, people of a race can't have the same pattern in their behavior , it depends on each individual how they act, maybe they can have common interests ,but that also does not depend on race. And people only would feel insecure dating a other race if they would feel that they wouldn't share interest or they would assume that they need a different treatment, which is not true,because when it comes to love everybody speaks the same language.
If you see him in school and he does not even come up to you or when you say hi and he ignores you ,than there is a problem. If he is not even in school then there is something going on which keeps him busy, but if i would be him i would text or call you at least, even if i am in the hospital.
You totally have a right for a explanation what is going on with him,i recommend try to get to him and ask him , maybe the situation is not as bad as it seems. You have to find out because its going to bother you for sure.
You can write me what happened if you want to, i've been thru something like this but i wasn't lucky unfortunately , i really hope that this not the case in your problem ,i wish you the best luck !!!!!
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