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*adlib

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Why can't I get wet with my new boyfriend?

Q.   I just want to start by saying that I've never had issues getting wet with my previous boyfriends and I also have no problem getting wet when I occasionally watch porn and masturbate. But for some reason, with my current bf, I can't get wet and ...

A.   20 December 2011: I think your jumping to conclusions about not being compatable with him just becuase you don't get wet...unless there are bigger things going on here that you didn't mention as far as your relationship goes. Sure kissing might be the trigger for ... (read in full...)

Revenge cheating...will it help ?

Q.   i found out that my wife slept with someone while we were engaged a few weeks after we got married. It has been 5months since then and i have not been able to forget or fully forgive . Im heart broken . Ive become very cold and mean to her, ive ...

A.   20 December 2011: Revenge cheating is a way for your bruised ego to act in a way that puts you in the made up belief that you are once again emotionally in control of yourself and in having feelings that make you feel superior to your wife...never in these situations ... (read in full...)

So hard to walk away after so many years. Where do I find the strength?

Q.   So the holidays are fastly approaching and I am dreading every minute of it. My husband and I have been together for 18 yrs now and it is now over. We decided a few weeks ago that he needed to leave after the holiday (only stayed cause of our 3 ...

A.   19 December 2011: Let him go...often in this society we hold on to things out of fear of loneliness/finances/security/routine...really it is a sign that our own self esteem has diminished and we no longer have confidence in ourselves that we are beautiful enough, ... (read in full...)

Do I have the right to be mad?

Q.   My husband and I rarely go out. We visit alot with his family and we go out as a couple often. But we dont go out with other couples. He has has a job almost a year now, and we have gone out 2x with the owner of the company and with the own...

A.   19 December 2011: This is one of those situations where your husband was just trying to do the right thing, but unfortunately you were both were along for the annoying ride. I remember in college and in my early adult years being put in the situation of ... (read in full...)

Wife is away, does husband want to play?

Q.   Can anyone please tell me why a married man has made it a point to tell me that his wife is out of town on business for a few days? Is this an innocent statement or is there a reason he is saying this to me?...

A.   18 April 2011: Could be a variety of reasons but we need more details....has he flirted with you before? Is he a hermit? Is he a player confined to a marriage that he constantly disses at work? I mean if you are already bugged out about it then your intuitio... (read in full...)

Girls, thoughts on chewing tobacco?

Q.   Quick question for the girls on here. How much would it bother you if your guy dipped. By dip i mean used chewing tobacco. Enough to leave him or view him differently? What if you have been with him a while and you barely find out hes been dipping?...

A.   7 April 2011: fracking disgusting...it is disgusting kissing a guy who was chewing and its even worse seeing him holding a cup around with him and spitting in it every couple of minutes....not attractive and totally not cool looking. I grew up around guys who ... (read in full...)

He says he wants to, but I am afraid I will ruin the relationship if we have sex.

Q.   okay, so i've been with my boyfriend for about 3 months now, we've been close friends for about 5 years. I'm the first serious girlfriend he's ever had, even though i've had quite a few boyfriends before him. the thing is... i'm not a virgin, an...

A.   7 April 2011: if you are already worried about breaking his heart, you need to ask yourself why and back out now....if you really were in love with him, you wouldn't even be asking yourself this question. If you are thinking of having sex with him because you ... (read in full...)

We were each other's first for everything and she broke it off. How do I get her back?

Q.   My girlfriend of 4 1/2 years broke up with me about 6 weeks ago. She told me she didn't love me anymore. She started talking to a new guy almost right away, but every once in a while she text me or calls me and says she misses me or is thinking ...

A.   7 April 2011: how old are you guys? She wants her cake and wants to string you along too in case the path of singlehood gets her nowhere. Move on- she left for a reason and if she wanted you back she would be with you right now. Go out, hang out with your ... (read in full...)

It's over, but he calls about five times a day. Is this harassment?

Q.   I recently broke up with my boyfriend of 7 years. We have a 3 year old daughter together, so obviously we keep in touch. He sees my daughter on weekends. I'm getting constant calls of him. My mum says I'm over-reacting but I don't think I am, I'm ...

A.   7 April 2011: Harassment: behaviour intended to disturb or upset, and it is characteristically repetitive. In the legal sense, it is behavior which is found threatening or disturbing....if you are feeling he is taking it to that level first try talking to him ... (read in full...)

He was jealous and possessive, but says he's changed. Should I risk going back?

Q.   I hope there is someone out there who can help me. I have been dating this guy for almost three years I love him so much. We recently broke up because he is extremely jealous and possessive and things seemed to get worse. Since the break up he has ...

A.   7 April 2011: Is his jealousy founded or is it speculation? Usually jealousy is a result of low self esteem and not considering ones-self of worthy or of value to their partner. Are there other signs of these behaviors? If so, it takes a long time and serious ... (read in full...)

Whenever b/f has to chose between me or friends & drugs, I lose!

Q.   I have been with my boyfriend for almost two years now. We've always had a great relationship- going out together a lot, regular good sex etc. We even ended up going to the same University together, which although many people said was a bad idea, ...

A.   7 April 2011: You are faced with one of two choices: a) accept him for being the social pothead that he is and not resent him for it...obviously he is semi addicted to the ritual of smoking with his friends as well as to how it makes him feel. He loves you beca... (read in full...)

Should I stay in this relationship and if so do you have ideas on what I/we can do?

Q.   Me and my girlfriend have had a roller coaster of a relationship...we are at a point now where we fight all the time and I have resorted to reading articles about how you know you are in a toxic relationship or not...so i went through and answered ...

A.   30 June 2010: I asked if she would consider writing down what it is that i do and how it makes her feel and we would exchange and talk about it...she said she was tired of reading books and just wanted to talk....so i suggested that we write down 2 or 3 "rules" ... (read in full...)

Husband has a fetish with my soiled panties!

Q.   We've been married 11 years, together 14 years. A few months ago, I discovered by accident that he's been stealing my soiled panties and keeping them in his home office. I just happened to go into his desk to look for the car keys to move one...

A.   2 December 2009: Yeah, this is just a regular fetish, nothing that should cause you to feel he has gender or sexuality issues....I have a guy friend who pays women for their used panties because he gets off on the sexuality of a woman's juices on the erotic ... (read in full...)

Clingy friend who wants to be more is driving me insane!

Q.   I have a friend who has been in love with me for the last 3 years. I have tried to be sensitive towards his feelings but it is getting to the point where I can't handle being the reason for his happiness or misery any longer. I have continually ...

A.   25 November 2009: Doesn't sound like he has a clear idea of where his friend boundaries lie...if you are feeling uncomfortable at work then as his employee and personal friend you need to make him aware of why. You don't have to threaten or be a bitch, or have ... (read in full...)

Guys, would you really love someone enough to let them go?

Q.   My boyfriend and I broke up. He feel into legal trouble, financial issues and family issues. I tried to be supportive, my life just kept progressing. We were happy together but we didn't spend as much time together since he was working to pay off ...

A.   25 November 2009: Yeah, his depression sounds like an issue...he sees you advancing and he isn't.. He probably feels threatened or insecure with being so unstable...financially, emotionally...sounds like he is following the traditional thought that he is supp... (read in full...)

Am I being unreasonable to expect him to help out?

Q.   The other day, my Italian boyfriend says to me "why do you always get quiet whenever you clean the kitchen". I tell him that it would be nice if he were to help someday, even just once, too. Immediate defenses go up and he tells me that it...

A.   25 November 2009: He sounds like he is looking for the same kind of woman that grew up in his household...Italian households are similiar to Latin households..the women care for the men and are in charge of the house, the cooking, the cleaning, the maintaining of the ... (read in full...)

He says vaginas are gross and doesn't want sex anymore. What can I do to have sex in my marriage?

Q.   My husband and I are very much in love, we have been married less than a year and we have been together about three years. Before we got married, sex was great. I was intimate and exciting. I am very much aware that this stage will fade some as ...

A.   25 November 2009: He said you should be with a girl huh?...hmmm...my alarms are going off here...is he big on appearances? Did he get married becuase he truly loves you or because it is the next stage of what he needs to accomplish on his todo list...were his ... (read in full...)

My girlfriend has genital warts, but I don't have them. Does that mean she cheated?

Q.   my girlfriend of a year got pregnant over 7 months ago and noticed some warts on her women area and didnt take much notice now there a group of them. now she claims shes as not slep with no 1 else. and shes not cheated. the doctor as called them ...

A.   25 November 2009: that sucks...they are the vagina version of a cold sore....she could have been a carrier and it just remained dormit until now...she could have gotten them from someone going down on her ages ago who had the beginnings of a cold sore or who also had ... (read in full...)

I'm in love with a married man who is in an unhappy marriage! What should I do?

Q.   Ok so there's this guy. I've known him for about ten years, infact even longer than his wife. He's actually a family friend and all we have ever been is friends. However about 7 months ago after me, his wife and him went out for some drinks, we went ...

A.   25 November 2009: I have been in this situation...actually his...and let me tell you this....no matter what he says or does...he is not ready to be in any relationship with anyone else until he is separated from her and has some time under his belt to let go and find ... (read in full...)

My wife has no sex drive but loves me very much. I don't want to cheat but what can I do?

Q.   I am bored with my wife. She has no sex drive and I don't know how to get her going. Every other part of our marriage is great. We get along great, in fact, we love each other very much. Everyone says how lucky we are to have each other but if they ...

A.   25 November 2009: Sex is another expression of your love for each other...I mean you guys created a baby from your love right?...and despite her religious beliefs, even god looks down on the comunion between man and wife as a good thing....did she only have sex with ... (read in full...)

Clingy boyfriend!

Q.   I am living with a super clingy boyfriend. Yeah... I never thought I'd ever have a problem with an overly clingy, affectionate man, but its been happening to me for over 3 years now. I am still so much in love with him but to an extent he's almo...

A.   25 November 2009: Have you told him how you feel? Is there reason for him to feel so insecure about the relationship? Does he feel you aren't interested in him anymore? Does he just need to hear that? Usually these actions come from some sort of action that cre... (read in full...)

Is that considered sex? Am I still a virgin?

Q.   if a guy stuck his penis all the way in my vagina but he just stayed there and didn't move. like there were no thrusting or humping motions, is that considered sex? or sexual intercourse? am i still a virgin?...

A.   25 November 2009: Everybody defines sex differently these days...virginity is based textbook wise on penile penetration..which he did...he might nothave moved around but he still did the textbook version...in the movies they imply it can be bloody, but that is just ... (read in full...)

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