How do I change?
Q. Hi,iam 17 years old and have been daeling with a lot,now iam ready for change.iam sexually active but after sitting down and thinking about it i asked myself 1 question (what have i really gained from having sex?)my answer was a lot of ...
A. 19 March 2010: My thoughts aren't very organized.... It sounds like your relationship to your mother is really important to you, and that you could use her love and understanding right now to break out of the downward spiral you are in. My guess is that yo... (read in full...)
Married but have been seeing someone else for 8 years and I just can't let her go...
Q. I am married, happily married with a baby, i know.. i know it is very easy to say if you are so happily married why do you cheat? I met this wonderful girl, that is gonna make any guy very happy one day, we have been together for 8 years and are ...
A. 19 March 2010: Obviously you have a conscience even if you aren't behaving morally. Somehow you have to find the good guy within you and do the right thing by your wife and your mistress.
You might also gain self respect and lower your own stress.
... (read in full...)
Another threesome story... should I do it?
Q. Help my boyfriend asked me if I would be willing to have a threesome. I am not attracted to women, but I would do anything to stay with him. We have a 6 year old son together, and he is the love of my life. I offerd to turn a blind eye and let him ...
A. 19 March 2010: I think it is a really bad idea for you to do that. Obviously you feel really insecure about keeping him, but this will not do anything to make your marriage more secure. It will just humiliate you.
You are a dear for wanting to please your man... (read in full...)
He wants it all the time but it hurts!
Q. Advise please...... Know this guy for 3 years as distant friends, hes sweet funny and a workaholic, stood up twice by him in past due to work then after some convos on msn we met up with a bunch of his mates for a night out (was soo good) his fr...
A. 19 March 2010: It may be that he can only get excited when it is a bit rough. If this is true - and rough sex totally puts you off - then you have a problem.
Maybe he would be a different kind of lover without the alcohol.
In any case, you have to communic... (read in full...)
How can I stop fancying my cousin???
Q. hi i recently met my cousin who i haven't seen since i was about 5 years old, i'm now 15 (he's 16) and i quite fancy him even though we haven't had any contact between this we've done pretty much everything with our lives the same. we have the same ...
A. 19 March 2010: Haha, that's really cute, natural and normal I think to fancy a cousin. I wouldn't recommend you act on it too much, but if flirting with him adds some spice to your life, I wouldn't worry about it. Just know your boundaries and don't cross them.
... (read in full...)
Is the saying true... once a cheater ALWAYS a cheater?
Q. I would like to ask the best way to handle my current situation. I just found out that my girlfriend had about 10 or more secret relationships before and while we were together (3 years). Whenever I asked her she said No or she said that guy is...
A. 19 March 2010: Don't get too emotionally involved with her. She is superficial and narcissistic. She doesn't respect you. She is playing with you and will only hurt you.... (read in full...)
He fell asleep on me during sex. Should I have said what I did?
Q. Me and this guy started out like 5 months ago... we are both very busy people, and just get to see each other after 12pm or on weekends, since he works at morning and I work on evenings. He sometimes picks me up from work and we go est something. ...
A. 19 March 2010: Of course you didn't say anything wrong. You were understandably a little frustrated.
But next time you could just say... yeah, sorry love, I don't feel like it anymore, and just ask him to hold you. That way you will make him feel valued a... (read in full...)
I'm annoyed that he couldn't be honest and give me a straight answer!
Q. I'm gay and I love one of my best friends and I told them a couple of months ago. They made it clear that they aren't, but they said that they respected the fact that I'm gay. I feel awkward when ever I pass him in the halls at school and I tryed to ...
A. 19 March 2010: You shouldn't be too angry cause it is kind of your fault that this situation happened. But you can be sad about it ;-)
It is not easy to love someone who doesn't feel the same way about you. You made yourself vulnerable to this person and he h... (read in full...)
Is the saying true... once a cheater ALWAYS a cheater?
Q. I would like to ask the best way to handle my current situation. I just found out that my girlfriend had about 10 or more secret relationships before and while we were together (3 years). Whenever I asked her she said No or she said that guy is...
A. 19 March 2010: I don't think you have a good future with this one and agree with what all the others have said.... (read in full...)
Girlfriend is giving very mixed signals... what does she want??
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for about 6 years; everything went pretty well, except for the past couple months when we both had a lot of stress from our jobs. Things are better now though (better work hours). The problem now is that she ...
A. 19 March 2010: Happy for you Dekken. Hope things work out and she comes to appreciate what she has in you.... (read in full...)
Wonderful man but not enough sex and bad at housework
Q. Hi I have been seeing my boyfriend for four months and he moved in to my apartment after two and a half months. I know this seems soon and it is! However, I know others who have managed this successfully and we thought carefully about doing this. It...
A. 15 March 2010: I agree with most of KCs answer.
I would add that you really should try not to sweat the small stuff. Some of the things you mention really sound like your own control issues and if you succeed in breaking his balls and getting what you think yo... (read in full...)
What goes through someones mind after a breakup?
Q. Hey everyone, my girlfriend broke up with me a little over two months ago. Im a lot better than what I was after it happened. She wont talk to me now for some reason. I would just like to get a better idea what goes through a girls mind after they ...
A. 15 March 2010: When you break up with someone, you feel really bad about it cause you know you are hurting them. But once you get the point where you decide to do it, you want it to be over and final.
I think she is being a coward (something we guys are usua... (read in full...)
He wants me to be honest with him, but when I am he goes mental!
Q. My boyfriend always tells me to talk to him and be honest, but whenever I am honest with him about something he's done to upset me, he goes mental. He doesn't hit me or anything, but he just argues constantly with me when all i want to do is get i...
A. 15 March 2010: He sounds pretty immature. You may have to give up on this one. I mean, if he won't open up and talk, what else can you do???... (read in full...)
Does he want me or not? I don't want to risk anything and lose him!
Q. Im stuck and it hurts so much. Before i continue i need you to know that this guy is NOT a player of any sort. he has never used anyone, hes never had a proper girlfriend i dont think, he is a very nice guy, abit big headed but then again sometimes ...
A. 15 March 2010: I don't know how to break this to you... other than stating the obvious. He's just not that into you. He obviously likes having you like him, and he cares for you. But he is not boyfriend material. (Prove me wrong, but that's my take).
You s... (read in full...)
Why did he spend so much on his cheating ex girlfriend but wont even put in a little bit of effort when it comes to me?
Q. Hello - as shallow as this sounds, give it a chance as I really need hep with my thoughts. I have been in a three year relationship with a man. Before he was with me, he was with a girl for two years. During those two years, he spent so much mo...
A. 15 March 2010: I guess she was better at manipulating him than you are ;-)
But, seriously, his stinginess with you does raise questions... I guess you feel undervalued by him, taken for granted.
I am all for mature relationships where both partners pull th... (read in full...)
Rules for a MMF threesome?
Q. Hypothetically speaking what would your rules of engagement for a MMF threesome be? I know the risks as we have discussed them. We have a strong line of communication and respect for each other and know that this is strictly for fun. With that...
A. 15 March 2010: I have definite bisexual tendencies and an MMF threesome is pretty near the top of my fantasy list. That being said, the one experience I had was strictly non-bisexual (at least for the other guy ;-)). I guess some mention of that aspect of t... (read in full...)
14 and may be pregnant. What should I do?
Q. I'm 14 and just lost my virginity one week ago. My boyfriend and I didn't use a condom. I was suppose to have my period this week but it hasn't came yet. Is this normal or may I be pregnant? I don't think he cum inside me but I'm not sure because it ...
A. 15 March 2010: I don't know, but let's hope that everything works out ok this time. But get it through your head - you have to use birth control. Condoms are the best protection against STDs (and a good policy generally), the pill is the best protection again... (read in full...)
Girlfriend is giving very mixed signals... what does she want??
Q. My girlfriend and I have been together for about 6 years; everything went pretty well, except for the past couple months when we both had a lot of stress from our jobs. Things are better now though (better work hours). The problem now is that she ...
A. 15 March 2010: I have been through something very similar and played for the fool, so my advice is a bit jaded...
It sounds to me like in the back of her mind she has made a decision, and you are already out.
A woman is typically no longer "in love" when s... (read in full...)
How often on average to people have sex?
Q. Just another question out of interest. but how many times a week is it considered normal to have sex? I heard a guy at work the other day say He and his partner had sex at least 4 times a day. I thought that sounded pretty excessive? I realise...
A. 15 March 2010: This is a question I would have asked when I was (unhappily) married.
These days, 5-10 times a week is normal for me...... (read in full...)
His libido is gone and I'm not sure why?
Q. I have been dating a great guy for a little over 5 months. We are both in our 20's. He has a very demanding job, and is extremely busy, while I am a college student with a much more flexible schedule. Our sex life has always been great- we have ...
A. 15 March 2010: The reasons seem completely legitimate, but you never know.
A month does seem to be a long time. I would say that you could afford to be patient for awhile longer, but...
You haven't been going out that long and I don't think you are under an... (read in full...)
I have no idea what's going on in her head..need advice!
Q. Last month my ex called to say that we were over and she needed a break from us, we'd been going out for 2 1/2 years,we'd been arguing a lot over the last few months,and I guess she'd just had enough. taking a step back from us has made me see some ...
A. 15 March 2010: You reflected on the reasons for the breakup and took responsibility for your part. You have begun to get your act together and work on your issues. Bravo!
You told her you wanted her back, and she told you her very legitimate concerns. But she ... (read in full...)
Get back together or no contact - did I make the right decision?
Q. My ex boyfried dumped me about a month ago, I don't know why, and has been texting me recently whilst I've been sticking to NC (Mod note: No Contact). I replied to the first few just incase he had changed his mind, but after realizing he was just ...
A. 15 March 2010: Yes, you made the right decision. He just isn't that into you and you are obviously still into him. I think tuning him out is the best thing you can do for yourself. If he comes crawling back, it's just cause you are easy prey. You really can't win ... (read in full...)
How can I make things less awkward?
Q. Ahhhh. Ok, so last night my best guy friend was having a huge party, after we both had a lot to drink we started dancing. We went from one dance party to another in separate rooms. When we got to the second he kissed me. HE initiated it, but I ...
A. 15 March 2010: It really isn't a big deal. This kind of stuff happens all the time. Roll with it, act like nothing happened. Laugh it off. ... (read in full...)
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