A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: hi i recently met my cousin who i haven't seen since i was about 5 years old, i'm now 15 (he's 16) and i quite fancy him even though we haven't had any contact between this we've done pretty much everything with our lives the same. we have the same tastes in music and everything. i don't know what to do as i obviously can't tell him i like him in that way as he's family. he's asked me if when he comes down to visit if he can meet some of my friends and play dares. i thought he was joking but he was being serious i didn't want to say no as i didn't want to sound jealous or something so i said yes, he said that he wouldn't do any kissing dares or whatever with me, and although i know it's an obvious point and it would be immoral if we did but i can't help but think 'who cares dares is ment for fun and pushing you out of your comfort zone'.i would like help with how i can stop myself from fancying him and if i should tell him that i wont play dares when he comes down.he's coming down sometime in july so any help would be much apreciated and would be most helpfull before then.thanks for any helpanon
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cousin, jealous, kissing Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the advice, but what can i do about the dares? from what you've said it should be fine as it's not like he's my brother. also i doubt i'll get any stigma from people as most people think he's just a friend (i have a photo of him on my phone and alot of people think he's my boyfriend) and if we're playing dares i don't think we'd go announcing it to everyone as we would get alot of stigma obviously but do you think it would be ok for me to play dares with him? (the dares me and my mates play are quite intimate, pretty much no holds barred appart from below the waist) i can't ask my mum as she'd say no to me playing dares with anyone let alone my cousin
A
male
reader, anysecondnow +, writes (19 March 2010):
Haha, that's really cute, natural and normal I think to fancy a cousin. I wouldn't recommend you act on it too much, but if flirting with him adds some spice to your life, I wouldn't worry about it. Just know your boundaries and don't cross them.
Of course you are probably focused on him cause there are no other qualified candidates at the moment, so you could set about finding other attractive boys to get to know....
Don't worry too much, though. Enjoy the feeling of fancying someone... it's nice, isn't it?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 March 2010): First of all please dont feel any shame in fancying your cousin, like you said you havent seen him since you were 5, its not like you have grown up together or anything. And he is not your sibling, although its not neccerily an ideal situation it isnt unheard of infact its quite common for cousins to be married off all throughout history and even to this day. There is some biological issues with reproducing with close biologically related people butyour only 15 i doubt your planning on setting up home and having kids just yet! Just enjoy yourself, be careful, and dont feel bad about your feelings. its natural to fancy people. it doesnt mean you have to do anything about it but if you decide you want to there no harm in that. You may get some stigma from peers if they find out but thats about it. xxxx
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