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... Send *oughlove a private message | | | *oughlove's profile:Hello, my name is Elena. I've recently broken up with my boyfriend of one year even though we were (and still are) in love because he was abusive and violent, which I've found out by accident.
I picked this name because I believe a person has to love, but he or she has to be strong. The words of God teach us that one must not love anyone more than they love God and the truth: to not love your wife or your brother your mother so much that you follow them to hell.
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Would I be better off alone even though we love each other??
Q. I fear I love my man too much. Currently, I'm living about a 2-hour commute away from him, in my parents' house, because I'm student teaching, and the school I teach at is close to my parents' house. I always look forward to weekends, because ...
A. 3 February 2008: I am in a similar situation. I recently broke off a relationship with a guy because I felt like I was doing more than he is. We would make plans but then some other stupid bs that leads nowhere has priority over what he knows he has to do for us to ... (read in full...)
Bullies and really confused.
Q. hello im 15 and at school i am always bullied mentally/verbal. i dont know what to do because they are starting to get to me and it really depressing i want to move or switch school but my parents push it away when i bring the topic up. how should i ...
A. 16 October 2007: When I read your questions, I see that what you seek is escape. It's ok to have that, you even need it, but only temporarily. Run away from all your problems.... and then run back and tackle them - either head on or otherwise. You have to find your ... (read in full...)
I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. What do I do?
Q. so here we go! Im 17 years old and will be 18 in november. Im a freshman in college and am persueing a law degree. I have been dating this guy for about 1yr and a half off and on. We dated for a good year and then he went away in nat. guard. H...
A. 14 October 2007: Generally, the relationship has the validity over a new attraction because you aren't supposed to start other #$@# while you are in a relationship, but I am not sure this applies here because you have both been treating your relationship like a ... (read in full...)
What should I do to make my dad understand?
Q. So yeah, I'm a 13 year old girl, turning 14 next year. and i have a new boyfriend who is 17 My mother knows about us and she told me not t do anything I don't want. One time he asked me if i wanted to have sex. I said no and he dint argue. He said ...
A. 14 October 2007: If you want him to understand, you have to understand him first. That means you have to hear some things you don't want to hear and see yourself in a way you refuse to see yourself. This is your first challenge as a young adult, so it might seem ... (read in full...)
I don't know what to say, and feel bad for what happened.
Q. ok well i had a boyfriend i was with for 8 months we was always arguin like everyday and then he started pushing me over and i was fallin on my bottom and hurtin myself then he started threatning to hit me but he never did he was starting to push me ...
A. 13 October 2007: Demand respect and act respectfully. You need to go slow to let yourself heal: do not just jump into another relationship as soon as you decided your are through, give yourself time to really be sure about your decision, recover from your loss, and ... (read in full...)
My best friend no longer cares.
Q. my best mate doesn't care any more. My best m8 and i used to be really close, like, we'd do everything together, always together. But gradually sh'e been speading time with lots of other girls who i don't really like. She never says hello to me w...
A. 13 October 2007: It is really good to hear that you are not following the crowd and sleeping around. My heart goes out to you for what you must be going through. One strong person's influence over everyone is usually stronger than they themselves realize or than ... (read in full...)
I am obsessed with my appearance!
Q. How do I learn to love how I look? I've struggled with my self esteem for most of my life. I hate my body and I hate my face. People do compliment me on my looks but I feel that they are probably lying for my benefit. I eat a very healthy diet and...
A. 13 October 2007: All anyone can offer to someone like you is a hug. Seriously. Find someone who can give you a big, warm, long hug, and if there's noone around give one to yourself. I am sending you a big hug from far away in the US, through the customs and the ... (read in full...)
Is he interested?
Q. hi i just wanted some help im trying to figure out if a guy likes me. i go to university with him basically in lectures he always sits near me and my friends most of the time he is directly behind me. he also touches me like he will grab my arm when ...
A. 13 October 2007: YES... (read in full...)
I want a threesome, she's reluctant. What do I do now?
Q. Ok here's the story, I hooked up with this chick I met a little while ago and we get along famously. We speak often, have a good time when we go out, great sex albeit a little infrequently due to distance constraints. It hasn't been going long ...
A. 13 October 2007: Just went back and accidentally found your response! The fact that your ex did this is definitely relevant to your obsession! I noticed, when you talk about this new girl, you do not sound like you like her or respect her very much. She was an easy ... (read in full...)
He came home at 6 AM with lipstick on his collar!
Q. I have been with partner for 2 years, we have just bought a house only 2 months ago. i love him very much but i dont trust him. he went out with work and didnt come home till 6.30 in the morning, while he was out i tried to phone him several times ...
A. 13 October 2007: You know he's cheating on you! I guess it's one of those things that's called "sticking it where it hurts". It's anyone's nightmare and it's happening to you! Sometimes things are so bad that you cannot bear to see the truth, even if you are staring ... (read in full...)
I walked on him and my gay brother having sex!
Q. I Have a problem....I've been seeing my boyfriend for two years now and last night I walked on him and my gay brother having sex!!! I really really love my bf and my brother and I know that I should dump him but I really love hi and he says it was ...
A. 13 October 2007: I think you should seek more qualified advice on this than you'd get from people on this forum, including me. I'd ask some people who know more about homosexuality and do some research.
I can definitely sympathize with what you must feel though. ... (read in full...)
I still sleep with my husband and father of our child, even though he is STILL sleeping with another woman. What can I do??
Q. Like I said in the question, you couldn't make this up. I will give you a bit of background and I would appreciate any advice, please do not be nasty or just rude, this is very very hard for me. We were together for five years, got together when I ...
A. 12 October 2007: Oh my God, you have a child!!! If that is not enough to pull you out of this, I don't know what is. You have someone's unconditional love, this beautiful person in your world, someone to build a whole world and a family with, you are so lucky ... (read in full...)
I'm a scheming little minx - should I break up with my ex?
Q. i met this guy 8 months ago.i liked him,so i said i give it a try.we were a couple for 6 months.he loved me,but i didn't share his feelings.i just liked him.so,our relationship was all about me!we broke up and then get it on again so many times,just ...
A. 12 October 2007: What goes around comes around. You try to play the system, and you get played. The only way to really win is to have good intentions. You keep trying to test these universal forces and "win", feel some sort of a superiority over another person who ... (read in full...)
My girlfriend doesn't make herself up at all! Is there any way I can address this?
Q. I have a question about something that is bothering me regarding my GF. She refuses to get a tan of any kind. OK that's fine. She doesn't want skin cancer. I can appreciate that. I am 44 and she is 40. Today she met me for lunch but she did not ...
A. 11 October 2007: I also don't wear much makeup. Most of the time if you see me I won't have any on. I am really shocked that there are men out there who think like you, like, who are afraid to be seen with a woman when she doesn't have any makeup on. If you tried to ... (read in full...)
I want a threesome, she's reluctant. What do I do now?
Q. Ok here's the story, I hooked up with this chick I met a little while ago and we get along famously. We speak often, have a good time when we go out, great sex albeit a little infrequently due to distance constraints. It hasn't been going long ...
A. 10 October 2007: Try including the word "love" in your lexicon. You talk about hook ups, relationships, experience, getting along, but you should focus on love. From this whole earthly experience we are all on, it is the only thing that lasts.
You obviousl... (read in full...)
What's the furthest you should go with a boy?
Q. Whats the furthest you shuld go with a boy? I mean, i like to make out with them but they always want me to go further, and im not even 15 yet. I dnt wanna giv them BJ or or toss them up, but this makje sme seem like a total virgin! Wat shuld I do? ...
A. 10 October 2007: You are already going too far. Stop making out with "boys" who are only trying to get some experience and bragging rights. Why are you in such a hurry go grow up? Why don't you try pursuing more age appropriate interests before your hormones get you ... (read in full...)
What happened to me? I think my drink may have been laced?
Q. Hey there! Im really really confused and getting really down about what has happened as i dont understand how/or what happened. The other week I went out with a group of friends. I had a few drinks and was feeling abit drunk (but Im usually re...
A. 10 October 2007: It was not your fault!!!! Your job now is to find places and people that will give you the love and nurturing you need in order to heal from this experience. You are here, which means you already know that.
Rape is said to be one of the most tra... (read in full...)
She had a one night stand and I'm struggling to accept that. Should I stay or should I go?
Q. Hello, I am flattened by emotions right now and need a little advice. Today I learned that my girlfriend of 6 1/2 years had a one-night stand about 3 months ago. She tells she was wasted and doesn't even remember how it happened. I am very confus...
A. 9 October 2007: You really love her, but now you are wondering, just how much does she love you? I am sure she feels horrible about what she did and wants to go on with you, but for 6 1/2 years, you've just been sitting there in limbo, and, if you are going to ... (read in full...)
I'm worried, he missed the time he said he will call, and I haven't heard from him in three days. What should I do?
Q. 3 weeks ago my boyfriend said we were on a break because he was depressed. He works 2 jobs and has a lot going on with his family. He said it isn’t fair to me that I can’t have a boyfriend who can come over for dinner and take me out. I told him I ...
A. 9 October 2007: It sounds like he's gone. It also sounds like his constant working and family problems and need for space are clues to hi commitment-phobia. You do deserve better, that was the one honest thing he said. What you've described is basically the ... (read in full...)
I'm worried, he missed the time he said he will call, and I haven't heard from him in three days. What should I do?
Q. 3 weeks ago my boyfriend said we were on a break because he was depressed. He works 2 jobs and has a lot going on with his family. He said it isn’t fair to me that I can’t have a boyfriend who can come over for dinner and take me out. I told him I ...
A. 9 October 2007: It sounds like he's gone. It also sounds like his constant working and family problems and need for space are clues to hi commitment-phobia. You do deserve better, that was the one honest thing he said. What you've described is basically the ... (read in full...)
Am I right to doubt my boyfriend?
Q. Ok, here's the problem, I love my bf but lately he has been saying how nice looking and open-minded my best friend is, my brother has told me to leave him because he thinks he is cheating on me and I want to leave him but we live in the same house ...
A. 9 October 2007: Just because he complements your friend you are thinking of ending the relationship? You are really going too fast both ways - 1) You shouldn't have moved in and agreed to share a bank account with someone with whom there's so little trust, 2) You ... (read in full...)
Am I right to doubt my boyfriend?
Q. Ok, here's the problem, I love my bf but lately he has been saying how nice looking and open-minded my best friend is, my brother has told me to leave him because he thinks he is cheating on me and I want to leave him but we live in the same house ...
A. 9 October 2007: Just because he complements your friend you are thinking of ending the relationship? You are really going too fast both ways - 1) You shouldn't have moved in and agreed to share a bank account with someone with whom there's so little trust, 2) You ... (read in full...)
Am I right to doubt my boyfriend?
Q. Ok, here's the problem, I love my bf but lately he has been saying how nice looking and open-minded my best friend is, my brother has told me to leave him because he thinks he is cheating on me and I want to leave him but we live in the same house ...
A. 9 October 2007: Just because he complements your friend you are thinking of ending the relationship? You are really going too fast both ways - 1) You shouldn't have moved in and agreed to share a bank account with someone with whom there's so little trust, 2) You ... (read in full...)
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