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age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Whats the furthest you shuld go with a boy? I mean, i like to make out with them but they always want me to go further, and im not even 15 yet. I dnt wanna giv them BJ or or toss them up, but this makje sme seem like a total virgin! Wat shuld I do? Am I being too much of a virgin??? Thanxx Reply to this Question
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female
reader, AdiPaidy97  +, writes (30 September 2011):
heeey. i am exactly the same age as youu and so far i have done...stuff! and trust me if you aren't ready for it, its awful and i regret it so much ! do what you are comfortable with doing and follow your conscience !! boys dont realise how much it affects a girl so dont allow him to push you around !! hope this helps :) good luck xxx
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female
reader, lyrickchick +, writes (13 October 2007):
Do you know that you aren't even legal to have sex yet. If somebody found out you of this boy could be in srious trouble. Anyway sort it out talk to this boy and tell him that your not ready and if he don't let up then the best thing you can do is finsh with him beacuse he isn't doing anything good for you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 October 2007): Virginity is NOT a bad idea. It's only uncool for those who just want to get into your pants, and I guarantee that not as many of your friends are doing it as it "seems like." You're only hearing about the ones who are, not the ones who aren't.
Boys are gonna push you as far as you're willing to go, so get used to it. Not just "bad" boys, and not just when you're any certain age. It's the way the genders are designed by nature. Boys who don't push for more won't get more. They learn that when they try being nice just end up watching all their not-so-nice friends get more action than they do.
There are boys/men who do not push your limits, but they are in the minority (and they usually want it just as much as the ones who do push). You need to decide what your limits are BEFORE you get to that situation, because if you leave anything undecided within yourself then I guarantee you WILL end up doing it pretty quickly.
You're 14. Don't do ANYTHING you don't absolutely want to do, and don't do anything "just for him." I'm in my 20s, and the girls I was kissing when I was 14 are such a distant memory . . . looking back it would have been idiotic to for me to have wasted any of my "boundaries" or "firsts" on ANY of them. That's the truth. You've got A LOT of boyfriends ahead of you; maybe even a couple decades of them. You absolutely do not need to do anything right now that you have any doubts about.
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A
male
reader, Tommy7  +, writes (10 October 2007):
No more than 10 minutes of making out is as far as a 14 year old should go. You should accept dates that are aimed at nice fun times. Otherwise you are hanging with the wrong crowd.
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female
reader, Cateyes +, writes (10 October 2007):
 Personally...I think you should be PROUD to be a virgin!!! How many other's can say that? There are more that aren't then are. Once you have sex, you can't be "revirginized". You are one of the few and what wonderful young man wouldn't love to eventually marry you when you both get older who knew that you were with no one else because you believed in waiting to get married. Hopefully he might be to.
Never do anything you do not want to do. Never give in to pressure. Never have sex with out using protection because the world has more and more people with STD's, herpes, and AID's. (Just a reminder)
FYI...I am proud of you that you are still a virgin!! :)
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A
female
reader, toughlove +, writes (10 October 2007):
You are already going too far. Stop making out with "boys" who are only trying to get some experience and bragging rights. Why are you in such a hurry go grow up? Why don't you try pursuing more age appropriate interests before your hormones get you really hurt. Do you really think you are special to any of these guys? You are still a child, so instead of getting your love from people who are just trying to use you, develop a better relationship with your family and look for friends.
Believe me, I know what its like to be 15 and in a hurry to be in control, and I've made those mistakes too. I can see from how you are talking now you are just at the beginning of a downhill slide of spending the next couple of years doing things you won't want to remember afterwards.
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A
female
reader, Dbabycup +, writes (10 October 2007):
I don't think you are being too much of a virgin... I think I kinda know what ur saying and I can understand where that pressure is coming from...but honestly don't give into it. I'm a senior in high school and I just started doing that kind of stuff. It's nto something to rush into you know what I mean...I know it can be fun, but if you only do that for those reasons, it could harm your self esteem later on and possibly (b/c some guys talk) have a negative impact on your reputation. Just take things slow and always be confident in saying No if you don't want to do anything. If they try to pressure you, then they aren't the right one for you and you don't need to be around them.Trust me its a lot more fun when you do it with someone ur really falling for and not just b/c it's something fun to do.. be safe and take care hun.
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female
reader, flower girl +, writes (9 October 2007):
 I have to agree with Kenny,
You go as far as YOU want with a boy and never let them make you feel you should do any more than that babe.
Take care.xx.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 October 2007): You are only fourteen, and you have clearly stated that you are not ready to go any further. You should never be under pressure to do something that you do not want to do. I know you probably hear this alot, but it is that bit sweeter if you wait until you meet someone that you care about, and who cares about you. And trust me ... you are not too much of a virgin ! Just stick with making out, until you are sure that you are ready and people will respect you for your decisions in the long run. Also, have fun being young, do not be in too much of a hurry to grow up !!
Good Luck x
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A
female
reader, Emmajane +, writes (9 October 2007):
 Go carefully and as Kenny says, never feel pushed. In all the relationships I had when I was your age I was the one who initiated things, when I felt ready. 99% of guys understand that NO means NO, so be confident and use the NO word!
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A
female
reader, natnatxxx +, writes (9 October 2007):
 There's nothing wrong with waiting a while. Everyone's different about how far they want to go at certain points. If a lad loves you enough, he'll except the fact he cant get anymore than a snog and wait until your ready.
You are not a virgin or a frigdit if your not happy with people going further than you want to. The decision is totally up to you. When you get with a lad, draw the line with them of they're limits, so they've been warned!
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (9 October 2007):
 Never ever be pushed in to something you are not happy doing. If a boy is trying to push you to go further all you have got to say is NO, end of. It does not matter what anyone thinks, just what you think is important. You are only young, and under the age of consent to be doing anything sexual anyway, so wait until you are ready, and don't let those boys push you into anything. remember all you have got to say is NO!!!.
All the best & good luck x
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