He says he got rid of his porn for me. Should I believe him?
Q. i have a question that is mostly for guys.. i want to start by saying that i am very aware that when a girl tells a guy she wants him to get rid of his porn, usually he just hides it.. but in my case, i never told him how i felt about it, the to...
A. 8 April 2011: Whether he did or didn't, he is with you and not with those porn stars and either way he clearly likes you a lot-- enough to consider your feelings in regards to things like porn and enough to try to make a gesture to show you how attracted he is to ... (read in full...)
Part of me wonders if he is hoping for a reconciliation?
Q. My boyfriend's ex fiance was a photographer. They broke up over two years ago, after being together for seven years. Now, we have only been together a few months, but I gradually came to the realization that he still has some of her pieces hanging ...
A. 8 April 2011: I brought it up to him, finally, after some odd behavior by him, and he told me that none of the pieces in his apartment were taken by her, and that the one picture of her, that was in that nook, leaning against the wall, was one he had taken down ... (read in full...)
Part of me wonders if he is hoping for a reconciliation?
Q. My boyfriend's ex fiance was a photographer. They broke up over two years ago, after being together for seven years. Now, we have only been together a few months, but I gradually came to the realization that he still has some of her pieces hanging ...
A. 14 March 2011: Thanks for the responses. I don't think I'm going to bring this up to him right now. I agree that art is art and I think that the images are very aesthetically appealing and in general have no issue with them. the only one that bothers me is the ... (read in full...)
She lied to me and I was completely honest with her!
Q. Hello everyone, I just need some help and advice. I am m27 engaged to someone I truly love and adore f21. Both of us know each other for last 8 months. I cleared and said everything about my past and she did the same as well. Now 3 days back, i...
A. 10 March 2011: That doesn't sound like an emotional affair to me, and since she is of legal drinking age, I'm a little confused as to what the big deal is. Again, if you have different standards in regards to drinking then maybe it is a big deal to you, but in ... (read in full...)
She lied to me and I was completely honest with her!
Q. Hello everyone, I just need some help and advice. I am m27 engaged to someone I truly love and adore f21. Both of us know each other for last 8 months. I cleared and said everything about my past and she did the same as well. Now 3 days back, i...
A. 9 March 2011: First, what do you mean by "indulged in drinking" ? Are you both as a couple and as people against drinking? If so I can understand some distaste in the idea that she has been drinking and lying about it. Is there an implication that she may have a ... (read in full...)
Why does he date me but yet still go to online dating all the time?
Q. Dear All, I need your advice here, as I really can't work this guy out. I met a lovely guy online 6months ago, (he's 45, I'm 41yrs, we are both single, he never been married, me divorced, was married a long time ago)we chatted for about a mont...
A. 9 March 2011: In my situation, things went a lot further. I told the guy that I was displeased with the fact that he was still on a dating website and we both agreed to delete ours (this was after dating for 2 months or so) and I found out much later that after I ... (read in full...)
Why does he date me but yet still go to online dating all the time?
Q. Dear All, I need your advice here, as I really can't work this guy out. I met a lovely guy online 6months ago, (he's 45, I'm 41yrs, we are both single, he never been married, me divorced, was married a long time ago)we chatted for about a mont...
A. 8 March 2011: I agree with CaringGuy. Unfortunately, this is a common issue in the online dating world. The internet has made it so easy for this type of behavior, and I agree that the lines he has used are pretty text book. I have been in this situation b... (read in full...)
I get paranoid there's a camera in my bedroom!
Q. This isn't really about love or relationship, it's about health I suppose, I'm not sure what's wrong with me! Here's the problem, every time I go into my bed room, I have to check in every corner that there's not a camera watching me?? I get real...
A. 8 March 2011: Sounds like you may have a compulsion. These can be derived from a disorder like OCD, Bipolar, Schizophrenia, Borderline, etc. Or it could be based on some instance of trauma like a post traumatic reaction. Maybe a bad nightmare or some instance in ... (read in full...)
Is her discomfort an excuse for not wanting more?
Q. So I read tons of stuff on here about girls being able to go for round after round of sex, and Its left me with a lot of questions. My girlfriend and I have, from what I can see, a very good sex life. Though we are both in high school, we do it...
A. 8 March 2011: It's normal, especially if you are her first. I would say that if you want it to last longer/have a shorter recovery period, steer away from over stimulating the clitoris because that is most likely the area that is most sore and I think guys can ... (read in full...)
He 's active on a dating site..does this count as cheating?
Q. I have been dating this guy for a month. In general everything has been pretty good. From our first date on, things have just been pretty serious. Our dates tend to be all day affairs, we see each other 3-5 times a week, we talk on the phone and ...
A. 21 February 2011: So, I confronted him, just explained that I felt mislead, and that I knew that he was still on a dating website and still active. He apologized and explained that he had tried to delete/deactivate the account but because of his payment plan for the ... (read in full...)
Should I lie? Or wait a while before I reveal my problem, when I date someone new?
Q. Ive asked about my memory loss before but this is a little different. I'll cut the story short i'm 20 and only have memories of the past 7 months, everything before that is gone and i've been told it wont come back. I was just wondering if i were to ...
A. 20 February 2011: First, I would say your focus should be memory recall, controlling your seizures and recovery, not necessarily dating.
I have seizures and issues with night terrors and memory recall as well, so I understand your concerns and of course relation... (read in full...)
Not sure what to think about wife's spanking-fantasy...
Q. My wife wants me to spank her before/during sex. This probably sounds like every guy's dream but there is a bit of a sinister twist that is making me feel a bit uncomfortable. When I asked her where the spanking fantasy had come from, she said t...
A. 19 February 2011: Sexual fantasies come from all over the place. The fact that hers is so directly correlated to her adolescence is not uncommon. Often people develop sexual fantasies from experiences that were not at all sexual. I guess maybe it was a bit tactless ... (read in full...)
Sometimes even after a few hours this guy can't finish!
Q. I have been sleeping with the guy that I am dating for a few weeks now and in general it's great. The one problem is that it takes him forever to finish and sometimes even after sex for a few hours, he just can't finish. Whenever he does finish i...
A. 19 February 2011: I really don't see him as the drug-using type, but I guess I will keep an eye out. I have been trying to set clear standards on when I am and am not willing to have sex based on my energy level, or telling him that we have to go to sleep by such and ... (read in full...)
Sometimes even after a few hours this guy can't finish!
Q. I have been sleeping with the guy that I am dating for a few weeks now and in general it's great. The one problem is that it takes him forever to finish and sometimes even after sex for a few hours, he just can't finish. Whenever he does finish i...
A. 16 February 2011: He is circumcised so maybe that could have something to do with it? He is 30 though, not in his early twenties, I know everyone is different, but it's gotten to the point of me not wanting to have sex with him because after getting up at 5 am every ... (read in full...)
Dating a guy with the same name as my ex is leading to trouble
Q. I broke up with my ex of 1 and a half years in July 2010 and though we have talked a few times since then, in general I have moved on and started dating again. The problem is that the guy that I am dating (we have been seeing each other for a...
A. 7 February 2011: Thanks, I think that is really helpful advice :)... (read in full...)
So what comes next? I don't want to jump right into sex so do we start using our hands next?
Q. Alright. I'm 24 and I've been dating a guy (26) for a little over a month. I like where things are going with him but am a little uncomfortable with the idea of sleeping with him just yet... it hasn't been proposed but let's face it, it's on his m...
A. 4 February 2011: I think you might be over thinking this. In some ways you may just want to listen to your body and take cues from that. These things aren't always meant to be so planned out. To more fully answer your direct question, I would suggest sensual ... (read in full...)
Advice for how to deal with a sibling with border line personality disorder?
Q. Hi I have a sister who I believe has border line personality disorder. I'm not a doctor, but she seems to have all the signature traits. I want to preface what I say about her by saying she's actually a pretty smart person. She's a doctor ...
A. 4 February 2011: These do sound like the traits of borderline personality disorder, or possibly a form of bipolar disorder. If you haven't already i would suggest reading up on the subject "Stop Walking on Eggshells" by Mason Kreber (I think I might have the ... (read in full...)
Is there a better word for female juices, and is this common?
Q. Im not at all sure how to formulate this question, so I hope you will understand what I mean. When I get wet.. and then don't wash right away afterwards, the juices dry up. And then it starts to itch. Once dry, the juices also start to "flake". I ...
A. 4 February 2011: Ummm, discharge would be the more commonly used jargon I think.
I think that is kind of common, generally post getting wet it is suggested that you urinate and wipe up down there. Having moisture down there can be irritating any if you are not ... (read in full...)
Why are women devalued after sex but not men?
Q. Why is it that after sex , a man devalues a woman and views her as " cheap stuff " or " slut " but you don't hear women calling men " cheap " ? Why is it that for a woman to be able to make the man stay interested in her, i.e. want her not jus...
A. 4 February 2011: Number one, I think you are meeting the wrong kind of men. Not all men devalue women post-sex. However, I understand your frustration and struggle because I agree that many men do. This is generally speaking because of how our society for the past ... (read in full...)
Our personalities are drifting apart but she can't see it. I feel I need to leave.
Q. I've been with my girlfriend for nearly 3 years now, things are excellent, she is almost perfect and a guy like me couldn't ask for any more from a girl, she knows all the ways that make me happy. The problem im having is that our personalities ...
A. 4 February 2011: If you are 100% sold on breaking up with her, then just let her know you need to have a serious discussion about the course of things. Try thinking up some clear reasons why you feel things are't/won't work out so that you don't leave her with ... (read in full...)
Sex drive issues, it's all going downhill!
Q. Im 21 and my spouse is 30. we've been together for almost 4 years now. the problem with us is sex. I want it all the time and cant get enough of it and well, he hardly ever wants it. when we first started dating, we had sex a lot, every chance we ...
A. 4 February 2011: First, would hold off on any marriage plans until you get this worked out. Marrying someone who doesn't fulfill you mentally, emotionally AND physically/sexually won't lead anywhere positive. I would suggest really trying to get to the heart of ... (read in full...)
Was he just using me to make this other girl jealous?
Q. I met this guy a month ago, we talked a lot and have gone out on a few dates. On the first date, after 4 or 5 hours hanging out and talking, we ran into some of my friends and I introduced him, he seemed fine with it and we continued hanging out and ...
A. 1 February 2011: He finally called me and told me the whole thing was a misunderstanding and that he was sorry etc. But I am still skeptical. I really am not sure how to take the whole situation. ... (read in full...)
No contact from girlfriend... Should I be worried?
Q. Well I have been seeing a girl for two weeks and last weekend was massive, had dinner at a nice restaurant, the next night i met her best friend, and then the next night was dinner at her parents place. Things are going really well and she has said ...
A. 1 February 2011: Give it another day and then call. You don't want to seem needy or clingy, but it is rude to not respond when you guys clearly have a precedent set for regular communication. She may be confused about her feelings for you and need a little space, ... (read in full...)
Does a life threatening illness affect your decision to enter into a relationship?
Q. I have met a really lovely guy. We have only had two dates so far but they have both been amazing. However before our dates I found out he has a few girls on the scene that he calls just for sex. He knew I knew about it so the conversation came up. ...
A. 1 February 2011: I have a serious illness, it's controllable so it's not exactly life threatening, unless it were to get out of control. Undoubtedly though I have had some near death experiences and will probably die younger than most and it definitely factors into ... (read in full...)
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