My married bf gave up the best sex with me to go back to a sexless marriage. How is that even possible?
Q. I'm hoping to get advice from all of you wise people because I have no idea what's going on. My married boyfriend left me. He said he's going back to his marriage because his wife found out about us. We've been together for several years. I...
A. 17 September 2020: Quite often when you hear about a man wanting or having a mistress people say stuff about how he has found someone else. They totally do not get it. The man is often older than the woman. He is very limited in time and money. He cannot be seen out... (read in full...)
If he is dating other women then what does he want from me?
Q. I was in an on again off again long distance relationship for 4 years. We were not together for more than 5 months before he would leave again. He said the relationship wasn't working out for him because he wanted a real life in person relationship. ...
A. 16 September 2020: I am sorry but I do not believe that you are tired of him and do not want him back. If that were true you would not be spending hours on sending this website an email and eagerly reading all of the replies. People do that in the hope of reading ... (read in full...)
Dating a escort and need advice
Q. So I recently started dating a escort who I had seen a few times. We really hit it off well and I knew after the first visit it would be hard not to fall for her, come to find out she wad feelings for metoo just not quite as strong at the time. We ...
A. 16 September 2020: I think you posted here recently saying very much the same thing. You contradict yourself a lot. On the one hand you say you are sure of her love and how wonderful it is, then you bring in negatives and doubts, it cannot be both.
Has it occurred... (read in full...)
Is my ex playing games with me?
Q. Me and my ex were together for 6 months, he is 5 years younger than me I'm 31 and he is 26. We live 2 hours drive apart,but we never let any of those factors affect the relationship. The only factor that did come into play at times, was covid didn't ...
A. 16 September 2020: When you reach my age you will have forgotten all about the few months you sort of knew this guy. Right now you cannot see that it is nothing and barely worth thinking about or remembering.
Think of women who have been living with or married ... (read in full...)
My married bf gave up the best sex with me to go back to a sexless marriage. How is that even possible?
Q. I'm hoping to get advice from all of you wise people because I have no idea what's going on. My married boyfriend left me. He said he's going back to his marriage because his wife found out about us. We've been together for several years. I...
A. 16 September 2020: I had a friend who was very respectable and decent. At the time she was aged about 40 and single, having become a widow. By chance she met a married man and he pursued her, he pestered her relentlessly saying he needed her, loved her, must spend ... (read in full...)
I’m having problems refusing invitations coming from people who either do not take the virus seriously or have their own biases on what is safe, usually justifying what suits them
Q. Hi uncles and aunts, I have recently come across a question on « how to say no » and read your great answers. Even though my question is similar, I would really need your help, because it is specific to this pandemic situation. I’m having pro...
A. 15 September 2020: Most of us have had at least one similar scenario since the lock down. My partner and I are like you, we are very cautious. He actually stopped working for months - at great financial loss - rather than keep meeting strangers who could pass on the ... (read in full...)
How to cut off a toxic and controlling friend whom I see often?
Q. I want to cut off a toxic and controlling friend but don’t know how. Normally, I would’ve just blocked her and said nothing. I don’t believe that’s necessarily the right way, as being direct and adult about it would probably be better. But I don’t ...
A. 15 September 2020: Most of us have been in a similar situation at least once.
Firstly you need to be more picky about who you class as a friend. People you meet up with when you go to a group are not necessarily friends. They are acquaintances. Real friends are peop... (read in full...)
My friend tried to kiss me knowing I have a boyfriend
Q. I met with a guy friend over the week end for lunch. We hadn't seen each other for about 9 or so months but message each other maybe on average once a month. I have been in a relationship for 18 months and my friend knows this as I regularly talk...
A. 15 September 2020: You sound quite young. This sort of thing has happened to me many times - sometimes the guy is chancing his arm and trying it on and at other times it is totally innocent. There is no need to be a drama queen and make a big issue out of it. No need ... (read in full...)
If he is dating other women then what does he want from me?
Q. I was in an on again off again long distance relationship for 4 years. We were not together for more than 5 months before he would leave again. He said the relationship wasn't working out for him because he wanted a real life in person relationship. ...
A. 14 September 2020: It was clear when he said he had a room mate that it was a female, a lover, someone who had moved in with him as a partner, but of course he would not tell you that - instead he preferred to push and pull and go hot and cold and cancel skyping at ... (read in full...)
I'm worried and feeling impatient that my falling out with my friend isn't getting sorted
Q. I feel silly writing this but here goes I fell out with a friend over something I did with best intentions but my friend didn't see it that way As they are busy working in had to WhatsApp an apology I was genuine as I felt awful and told th...
A. 14 September 2020: Your friend may not see this your way. Maybe your friend thinks but you meant it then, it is easy to say sorry after simply because you do not want to lose their friendship rather than because you really are sorry.
Concentrate on your family, ... (read in full...)
Why is my married boyfriend emotionally torturing me? He keeps leaving me and then coming back!
Q. Why would the married man I've been involved with keep leaving me and coming back? He left me in July and came back. He just left me again. He said he loves me and that's why he has to let me go. Cause he can't stand seeing me suffer cause I want ...
A. 14 September 2020: I am sorry that you are struggling, it hurts, but you need to see things as they really are. When a man is selfish enough to get a woman to become his mistress you know that he is selfish, you accept it, you do not try to turn it around into him ... (read in full...)
He's the perfect guy who's been there for me in the darkest of times but why is he not making it official? Is he stringing me along?
Q. Mid June i met the most amazing guy, he’s brought a lot of happiness and Comfort to me at a bad time. My mom was diagnosed with blood cancer around six months ago and shes has just been on a steady decline, shes been hospitalized weeks at a time and ...
A. 14 September 2020: Your man has told you why he is holding back. He is devoted to you in many ways, so many ways that you rejoice and are over the moon. But before he can be 100% he wants to meet your family - which makes him cautious and old fashioned. How is this ... (read in full...)
How did you finally make the jump to get married? I'm terrified at the thought of it!
Q. Should I get married now or wait? My fiancé and I have been together for 5 years we’ve been granted since 6 months after we met. I waited all this time to get married because I felt though I said yes to marrying him I wanted more time to see how ...
A. 14 September 2020: You do not need to get married to be commmitted. I have been married, years ago and ended up insisting on a divorce - so much for that commitment eh. Now I am far more committed to a man who I have been living with for years, we have no intent... (read in full...)
What do I write to this troubled man in prison that is a friend of the family?
Q. Dear Cupids, My husband and I bought a house in a village 6 years ago. We go there a couple of times a year and hope to retire there. When we came there, we met a couple. We’re in our forties and they are 55 and 64. They have two grown chil...
A. 12 September 2020: I find it strange that this is so important to you. How do you usually spend your time and why give some of it to this? This seems to be very time consuming yet pointless. Some people like to feel important. Like a knight in shining armour c... (read in full...)
I feel lost in life and myself. I don't know what to do
Q. I am truly lost in life and myself. i cry constantly and have anxiety and feel alone wherever i go. i just break down in tears in the street and at home everywhere i grew up with an abusive father who called me names and put me down and wouldnt...
A. 12 September 2020: Thank you for posting again. But I honestly believe that you need to stop dwelling on how your family were with you. Lots of people were abused as children, far worse than you, some were abused to the point where their family went to prison. You ... (read in full...)
I feel lost in life and myself. I don't know what to do
Q. I am truly lost in life and myself. i cry constantly and have anxiety and feel alone wherever i go. i just break down in tears in the street and at home everywhere i grew up with an abusive father who called me names and put me down and wouldnt...
A. 12 September 2020: Thank you for posting again. But I honestly believe that you need to stop dwelling on how your family were with you. Lots of people were abused as children, far worse than you, some were abused to the point where their family went to prison. You ... (read in full...)
I'm worried my ADHD husband might hurt himself don't something that isn't even important
Q. My husband suffers from ADHD. He was diagnosed as an adult, which explained why he was so physically active, had problems with memorizing people's names and birthdays (never-mind their children's names or birthdays), kept losing his stuff... and as ...
A. 12 September 2020: I have a lot of sympathy for you. You have done everything you can and more, you have been resourceful and diligent and a wonderful wife. I think you need to be reminded that you cannot do more and your husband is very lucky to have you. It is not ... (read in full...)
How can I avoid so much conflict in my relationship and be happier?
Q. I have been with my(27) bf (29) for 6 years. Recently things have been quite intense because of lockdown and I feel like we keep falling into certain arguments. My bf is funny and can be sweet and we have a lot in common. However, he struggle...
A. 10 September 2020: He wants to be with you so he can feel superior to you and talk down to you - something about his own past making him insecure in himself and using you as a whipping post and building block to feel better may suit him, but how does it suit you? This ... (read in full...)
What do I write to this troubled man in prison that is a friend of the family?
Q. Dear Cupids, My husband and I bought a house in a village 6 years ago. We go there a couple of times a year and hope to retire there. When we came there, we met a couple. We’re in our forties and they are 55 and 64. They have two grown chil...
A. 10 September 2020: You could spend a lot of time thinking about this, talking about it and posting about it but where does it get you or him? Unless you are determined to look good and try to be seen as helpful to the parents there is nothing else that can be gained ... (read in full...)
How do I stop feeling the need to give a valid reason when refusing something?
Q. How do I stop feeling the need to give a valid reason when refusing something? First of all I'd like to let you know that I never blame other people for trying to get their way. This is ALL on me. I had this problem for as long as I can remembe...
A. 10 September 2020: I feel sorry for people who feel that they must justify their decisions and defend themselves, it shows a lack of confidence and self esteem. People pick up on this and take advantage and twist it to their advantage. You need to decide which is ... (read in full...)
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