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*dvicegem agony aunt

*dvicegem

United States  (Female   XML/RSS

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*dvicegem's profile:

Hi,

I am currently in the best relationship of my life, but it wasn't easy getting here!

I met him while we were both in other relationships, and 4 months into our relationship we had to do long distance between California and Washington. Luckily that was temporary and then we lived together for almost 3 years.

Now, for the past year, I have been living in the Netherlands while he is in California due to visa issues (I am British, he is American). In the past year, we have seen each other only twice... The first time, he proposed to me, and this past time, in May, we had the most perfect wedding at my father's home in the south of France.

Now we have finally been approved for my visa and we will officially start our lives together next month.

I hope that my experiences, and the fact that we have come through the other side happier and stronger than ever, will help and inspire you.

Please feel free to ask me anything and add me to your firends list if you like my advice, I'll be happy to reciprocate :)

Looking forward to hearing from you,

xoxo G

What should I get them as a present? Their mom died.

Q.   my friends mom died two years ago today and I feel like I should get them something. they are two brothers, 15 and 17, and I want to let them know I'm thinking of them. I was gonna get a card and a cookie cake and a gift card for them to go out ...

A.   24 June 2009: Honestly, I wouldn't do the cake and gift card. This is the anniversary of their mother's death... it is better to take their mind off it, such as your dinner idea, or go out for a movie, and if their mom comes up, embrace that conversation and ... (read in full...)

Should I be worried that it's over, or am I making a big deal over nothing?

Q.   Hello all, hopefully someone will help me. I have been dating this girl for about 2 months now. At first we stayed talking on the phone for like 5 hours a night, and now it is 15 minutes here 45 there. She never wants to talk on the phone to me ...

A.   24 June 2009: It sounds like there are two possibilities. First, she's "just not that into you", and considering you have only been dating for about 2 months, I would say you should let that one go... problems this early on usually lead to more problems... (read in full...)

Cancelled the wedding and I don't feel bad about it!

Q.   I just left my fiance of 3yrs and cancelled our wedding. He was very insecure and always gave me hell if i wanted to go out with a friend, we wanted different things in life and grew apart over the years. He is beyond devestated by my leaving, but I ...

A.   24 June 2009: Yes!! You made the right choice, and the fact that you are still comfortable with your decision afetr having made it only confirms that. Yuo have the advantage in being the one calling off the relationship because you obviously had to think ab... (read in full...)

Would this be classified as rape or no?

Q.   I basically wanna know if this classes as rape and if the guy still has an interest in me or not. Well about four months ago i went to meet a guy off the internet. He wasnt the first person id met off the internet and i always have an incling ...

A.   24 June 2009: First of all, you need to cut off contact with this guy. Your profile says you are still quite young and any "relationship" where you have to even ask yourself this question, is not a relationship you should pursue, or encourage. Since you say ... (read in full...)

Who is more important - his friends or me?

Q.   hi guys. recently iv been haveing a few problems, and i think its really affecting my relaitonship. im suffering from depression and i think i have a few other issues. recently me and my partner have been falling out a lot and things are close...

A.   24 June 2009: Hi Jenna, I think you answered this question at the beginning of your post, "things are close to an end". It sucks and you won't want to hear it, but honestly... if you were in a happy relationship, this issue with th eparty would be old news... (read in full...)

He wants sex but I don't. What should I do?

Q.   Noone dont find me attractive ive ony sortaa hadd a boyfriend for a few month but he sed i was boring because i didnt want to do anything sexual with him. We kissed and hugged butt i didint want to be forced to do things.hes wierd with me and outs ...

A.   24 June 2009: Hi there, First of all, you are 13-15 years old!! You should be having fun, not worrying about sexual pressures! How old is this boy? I'm not saying don't go out with boy's, or have relationships etc... but you are too young to be having this d... (read in full...)

How can we get financial assistance?

Q.   my fiance and me are trying to find legal help. leagal aid has told us they will not help us. we are living on employment that is not possible to pay for an attorney. we are being sued for financial hardships by her ex husband because we had no ...

A.   24 June 2009: Hi scrow113, Could you give us some more information? You mention that your fiance is paying child support to her ex. I assume that means he has custody? Is she paying the full amount as ordered when they went through their divorce? If this is ... (read in full...)

Why did he cheat if he says I'm the best thing that happened to him?

Q.   This is new to me, so forgive me. I'm usually the one giving the advice, not asking for it. But for once, I'm stuck. I've known this guy for two years, and we've always been great friends and just about 6 months ago we started talking every si...

A.   24 June 2009: I can answer the second part of your question quickly, so I'll do that first. This guy cheated on you, and now that it isn't working out, he's coming crawling back to you. If you take him back, he will do it again because he knows he will have you ... (read in full...)

Overpowering urges, can anyone help me control them?

Q.   heya I'm having a problem. I'm a male, 17 and I want to control my urges to females. Its natural for me to feel a greater desire at this age but I want it to stop. I feel that when I control this desire I will be able to talk to girls more confi...

A.   24 June 2009: I think firstly you need to find a way to change your attitude towards these feelings. Right now it sounds like you may be talking to a girl, start fantasising about her and get embarrassed, therefore making your approach less confident. Everyone ... (read in full...)

He masturbates to my cousin's naked pics! I'm so angry about this..am I over reacting?

Q.   I have a 20 year old cousin who works as a model. Recently I found my husband keeps naked pictures of her in his sock drawer. We see her at family gatherings and I'm scared he will want to have an affair with her. She flirts a lot with him but ...

A.   24 June 2009: You just need to ask yourself if you can trust your husband or not. Your cousin doesn't really come into it as he can walk away regardless of what temptations she may throw his way. To me, it sounds like what he said it is, a harmless fantasy... (read in full...)

Why won't she return my call?

Q.   I met this girl about a month and a half ago, and we started talking, and hanging out all the time. She would stay the night multiple times, sometimes days at a time. She would also leave her things over at my place. Ive met her parents and she has ...

A.   24 June 2009: Hi there, First off, you didn't mention your ages... the way you are describing the relationship sounds like you guys might be quite young? This doesn't mean your relationship has any less value, just that more thought goes into the process and ... (read in full...)

What would be the best way to get answers without making myself look like a idiot?

Q.   hi all, i posted a question yesterday booty call vs feelings and got some grate replys now this bloke seems very kind an likes to please me he likes it when i say iv enjoyed something he has done for me and he makes me feel safe, something i have ...

A.   23 June 2009: I think you know what the answer is here... You're having a sexual relationship with someone who is in a "committed" relationship with someone else... it's a booty call. Now this doesn't mean he doesn't have feelings for you, this is a separate ... (read in full...)

I have a boyfriend but I may just have feelings for this other guy! What do I do?

Q.   okay, Dilemma. I have a boyfriend, a past guy hurt me and now he is trying to come back into my life. the story: I moved schools and met a really nice guy (he had a gf). So at first it was really nothing, at least to me it was just a fr...

A.   23 June 2009: Okay... you may not like this answer, but I think you should be honest with yourself so that you don't get stuck in a relationship you will regret. Do you keep talking to this guy? I would suggest no. If you have feelings for him, you will onl... (read in full...)

If you're in an LDR and it's working, PLEASE respond!

Q.   I need to know if Long distance relationships work. So for all of you in happy LDR's, please respond and tell me that they work and you're happy. Also, how often do you see eachother? the guy i like is 6 hours away from me and we both are broke ...

A.   23 June 2009: Craig and I had to do long distance twice in our relationship. The first time was when I transferred from a JC in California up to Washington State University. This was quite earlyon in our relationship, and it was actually not too bad. Having our ... (read in full...)

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