A
female
age
30-35,
*elp is at hand
writes: Noone dont find me attractive ive ony sortaa hadd a boyfriend for a few month but he sed i was boring because i didnt want to do anything sexual with him. We kissed and hugged butt i didint want to be forced to do things.hes wierd with me and outs me down wen hes with his friends but wen hes on his own hes loverly to me But one things a problems hes always got sex sex on his mind. What shud i doe because i love him Please please please please hlp me im realy stuck on what to do! Many thanks x Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2009): dump him he's obviously looking for sex out of you not love
A
female
reader, betty_black +, writes (24 June 2009):
 Youre too young to be having sex! You wont get any pleasure out of it and the guy is clearly using you for sex! You seem like a smart girl to have not given into his pressures already, so stick to that and no matter what he says dont. If he continues, finish it! Tell him its not what you want, your too young and if he cant accept that then its over! As Uncle Phil said, all this guy will do afterwards is go bragging about it to his mates. It wouldnt suprise me if hes already done that to other girls, or preteneded he has to seem tougher to his mates. Boys at that age are not mature enough to be having sex. Steer clear.
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A
male
reader, Harry Castle +, writes (24 June 2009):
 Yes to all answers so far, especially Uncle Phil.
I want to be as honest as possible for you, so please don't be offended....
If, as you say, you aren't the most beautiful of girls, my guess is that he regards you as an easy target for sex, since you haven't been able to attract many boys and thinks that,m in your desperation to keep him you will be ready to do what he wants.
This also explains his attitude towards you in company - he doesn't want his mates to think he is fond of a "lesser attractive" (sorry) girl and is playing up to them.
If he really isn't as keen on you as he pretends and his attitude amongst mates is the true one, his behaviour when you are alone is simply to get into your knickers.
Bluntly, young boys (and some not-so-young ones) are like that: a harsh fact of life, I'm afraid.
Just refuse all attempts to persuade you into sex, because he will not respect you and, as has been said already, be likely to brag about and even embroider what you have let him do.
He will then leave you and go off to find another target, all cocky and full of himself that he is now a "man"!
I will also offer the usual caveats....it is illegal, you will be prey to STDs, pregnancy and a broken heart.
Harry.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 June 2009): Let me tell you a few simple truths.
If you have sex with him he'll brag about it to all his mates, and they will in turn come banging on your door looking for some of the same. At your age, even letting him feel your tits will have the same effect.
It will probably hurt because your body isn't ready for it.
Sex at an early age gives you a higher risk of getting cervical cancer.
He probably won't really know what he's doing and it will be embarrassing all round.
You would regret it as soon as you'd done it and probably spend several hours in the shower trying to cleanse not only your body but your mind as well.
The next posting you put on here will have the title 'Could I be pregnant?'
Save your body for someone who will appreciate it and who loves you as much as you love him. Having sex is an adult activity that requires an adult mind to cope with it.
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A
female
reader, advicegem  +, writes (24 June 2009):
 Hi there,
First of all, you are 13-15 years old!! You should be having fun, not worrying about sexual pressures! How old is this boy?
I'm not saying don't go out with boy's, or have relationships etc... but you are too young to be having this dilemma.
If he won't take no for an answer, then he doesn't deserve you. Also, if he really has feelings for you, he will show that in public as well as in private.
As for loving him... love is a very powerful feeling and hard to ignore... but if love is making you think about doing things that you are not ready to do, or don't want to do, then I would say that isn't love.
You're young, and you obviously respect yourself, so hang in there. Have fun and make friends!! One day you'll meet the right person who will respect you and your beliefs and love you back.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (24 June 2009):
 You need to stick to your guns. Being forced or pressured to having sex is NOT love, honey.
Yes, he is full of testosterone and most likely like a lot of young teenage males a horny young fella. If he can not respect that you aren't ready then you need to let him go. There really is more to a relationship then sex.
If you do deside to have sex with him because you love him so, you will regret it.
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