A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Whats wrong with fat gals? Im a fat gal. I take good care of myself. Better than a lot of skinny gals. Why dont i get noticed? My best friend is skinny and she smells ,always have dog hair all over her cloths ,her handr are dirty ,whx do guys like her more?
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 April 2011): Nothing at all darlin' You're probably very sexy because big is sexy. PERIOD
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2010): I dated a girl who was over 100kg, i'm around 80kg. I loved her personality and had fun with her, but when it came to the bedroom i couldn't stand it...., the bed moved every time she rolled over, she would have breathing problems when having sex, i would never go down on her - scared her legs would crush my head...it just wasn't very nice. I thought i could get over the size but when the sex life is no good then it effect's the whole relationship...not worth the effort. i know it sounds horrible but ask a guy honestly, and he will say 9/10 times men are seeking a slender girl, not a surfboard (they are boring) but a healthyweight range. We also want our partners to be around and not suffer from illness or premature heart attacks, we want them to conceive children and be happy with themselves, and being a healthy weight will do that. Also society is not going to change and accept fat people, you can tell yourself that it will ...but your kidding yourself it won't. How many fat chicks get attention, less promotions, treated worse etc, almost second class citizens. If your overweight, get a trainer, invest all your time and effort in looking after yourself, spend the money on the gym, or a good dietician or doctor to find out why your putting on weight...not everyone can help being overweight but the majority can.
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male
reader, joe101  +, writes (23 October 2009):
 THERE IS NOTHING WRONG WITH FAT GIRLS,THEY ARE MY FAVOURITE AND I CANT WAIT TO MEET AND GET MARRIED TO ONE COS IT AS BEEN MY DREAM TO HAVE ONE AS WIFE.............I CARE SO MUCH AM JOE
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2008): Nothing is wrong with fat girls. You are sexy, you've got lumps and bumps that I don't have. Some guy I met is looking for a woman just like you. I'm too small. Give me a private message via mail and you can talk to him direct. He likes the gymn, he's got lots of muscle, but his looking for a larger lady, and I just can't compete. Many guys like the larger ladies, so don't dispair. Your beautifull, no matter what society says. There's many guys out there who like the bumps, lumps, curves and celulite, you just got to find them. Please contact me, my friend likes bigger ladies, I'm too small and I'm not sure what to do. I promised to put on some weight, but I think you suit him more than I do. Your beautifull, you have tits, I can't compete. I'm just a slim thing, I'm jealous of you bigger girls, who have curves and lumps in the right placess and drive men wild. Different strokes for different folks I think.
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female
reader, LaydeeOfSorrows  +, writes (11 July 2008):
 Im slim, and i hardly get noticed either!
So i don't think it's a weight thing.
Maybe you should just try to meet new guys
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 July 2008): No, some girls aren't meant to have curves. Girls are meant to look however GOD made them to look. Holla!
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 November 2007): This is like asking why girls don't like fat guys.
It's just because the media portrays skinny people as sexy and fatter people as ugly. I think if you truly are in love, weight doesn't matter, but for personal preference, i like skinny girls. I find them better to look at =/
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 July 2007): nothing is wrong with being as you are!! I used to think skinny girls got all the fun, how wrong i was, I 've been married and divorced and am now extremel happy with my new partner of 4 years who is the father of my son. Big girls, stop finding excuses, guys love you, but don't know how to approach you.Have fun
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2007): i don't think the answers here are truthful of what most males think. i can't find the right words as to what to write here, but i just thought you needed to know that. I literally wrote almost an essay here about a male's view on fat women, and the definition of what we think fat is, but .... don't think it would be welcome here.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2007): Nothing. Nuff said.
I'm 130, looking at a 150 ish girl, and shes hot so why not? dont judge on that weight stuff. Who cares?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 July 2007): nothing is rong with fat girls .and keep on keeping your self smart
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2007): The reason you don't get noticed is because most guys are shallow superficial arseholes when they're in their teens.
Yep, i was also and i think i missed out because of it. I don't remember ever REALLY caring about any girlfriend i had at that age because they were such high maintenence bitch princesses.
Were more like bragging rights....
Maybe you should be concentrating your efforts on a different group of guys?
If you have patience, you'll find the boys of more substance when you leave high school and go onto university.
Some do stay like that forever unfortunately but in my experience they are usually complete knobs to start with (think loud mouthed overly macho football playin' dumbass bogan tradesman types)
My girl is large but she has gorgeous eyes/face/smile/hair/tits.... etc, is intelligent, looks sexy as hell naked, is great in bed and our personalities compliment each other perfectly. Luuuuvvvvv herrrrrr.
And no, i'm not a "chubby chaser". I don't really think it matters much what size a girl is ... although to be fair it has to be within reason. Stick thin girls(the air and water diet variety) have no tits and have too many pointy edges. Always feels like you'll break them if you hug too hard. The other extreme is also true - too much and you start to lose your womanly shape. If the definition and shape of your facial features have been consumed by extra necks or you have to lift a belly out of the way to have sex then you can't really blame the boys for not looking.
Girls are meant to have curves! They just don't look or feel right without them.
And no i'm not promoting being overweight, it's not healthy.
And no I'm not ugly, quite the opposite.
And no, fat girls aren't great in bed "because they have to be".
Been with plenty of thinner hotties who were SHITHOUSE. Are quite often completely selfish and lazy in bed. It's as if they think all they have to do is undress, be a starfish and they're doing you a massive favour.
I think the point i originally had in my head hasn't really come out right in this rant. Man i write like an arsehole, sorry folks. Not sure if i've helped here :-(
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2007): I completely agree with Jonty.
What a great friend you must be to slag this poor girl off.
Obviously it not your looks putting people off its your personality!
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male
reader, Jonty  +, writes (16 July 2007):
 I dont think it has anything to do with your size. From what you have posted you are slagging your best friend off over the internet, saying she smells and is dirty! A much nicer person would approach their friend about this and not to the whole world on the internet, granted we dont know who it is, but nether the less, its not a very nice thing to do.So instead of blaming your weight, why don't you look at the way you are treating people, maybe this is why you are not getting the same attention???
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2007): Aside from Dr. Pete's usual good advice, I think your weight ratio to size and age really depends on a few things. Are you just meaty, possibly a bit over the ideal weight as 'prescribed' by health specialists, or are you unhealthy in the amount of weight you have?
Also like HanBan kind of mentioned, what does your shape look like? What I mean is for me personally, a woman's shape matters more than whether she is thin or not. If she is thin by has no 'extended' features, I may find her physique lacking in attractiveness, or if she is meatier but she is round every where with no distinct features, then that may also not be attractive as well.
Another thing to think about is how health is associated to looks. If you are 200 pounds of fat at 5-5, you might want to do something to firm yourself up and lose a bunch of it. If you are 80 pounds of skin and bones at 5-5, you may also want to do something to fill up the void and gain some pounds.
Lastly, as no one had mentioned, sometimes, it's not just a person's body that a guy or a girl looks at. I mean, say a girl is a bit chubby, but her face and smile brings you a sense of enlightenment... Or say a girl is chubby but her face has warts all over and a huge crooked nose and hair in frilly pink...
Ah can't formulate words today.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2007): big girls need loving two, am a big girl i get mine, its all about how you feel about your self, walk with your head high and i promise you will see
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female
reader, cuddlyserenity +, writes (14 July 2007):
 there is nothing wrong with being 'fat'.
i am a larger lady and have a wonderful man who loves every inch of me.
a lot of men like to have women with curves.
too many people tend to think too much about the outer wrapping and not the inner being. i bet you are a lovely person who will help anyone and given time, people will see this quality in you.
just enjoy life and those who cant see past the size of you, arent worth knowing.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 July 2007): Hi my darling,
There is absolutely nothing wrong with you!!!!!!!! And to the anon male 13th july how very rude, that is not how all men think at all... That kind of shallow answer gives men a bad name you have no heart or soul, that may be how some people feel but not every man hunny.. Dont take any notice of that kind of imature answer...
My sister is on the larger side she goes on holiday to barbados and the men out there like large women she said it would be pointless me going as im far to slim,:) Dont put yourself down sweety someone will come along and like you for who you are and beauty lies within hun and im sure you are just lovely TAKE CARE OF YOU LOVE MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2007): Your problem is that you are fat. It is the most politically incorrect thing to admit but, as usual, it is the truth. Guys like skinny girls over fat girls and that is a fact that most men will admit if honest. Looks have a lot to do.
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female
reader, Shan14  +, writes (13 July 2007):
 There's nuthin wrong with u!!!!!!! I'm sure ur very pretty, who cares about weight cuz I sure don't.... I'm sure boys do notice u but their just scared cuz u got body(which is a good thang not bad) and they go for ur friend cuz they know she's not as stong and beautiful as u r!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2007): Your problem has nothing to do with your weight. Be honest with yourself, don't blame the problem guys not liking "fat" girls.
The problem is you don't feel confident and you don't feel attractive to men. When you admit these insecurities you'll stop blaming it on the weight and you'll notice the men that are attracted to you and that your friend has nothing special about her at all.
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female
reader, bemused  +, writes (13 July 2007):
 Hi Sweetie.
I just read your post and I paticularly liked the input from Carina as she lives in South Africa as you do. I think what a lot of the other posters are saying is that...yes you may not get as much attention as your thinner friend but there will be people out there who will find you attractive. In my travels I have seen lots of heavier' gals who do just fine in the romance department..some of these people have fantastic personalities and confidence and it makes all the difference. I think how you dress and feel about yourself makes all the difference as well. The fashion industry has finally clued in and you can look sexy and attractive. On a personal note my neice is a stunning young woman and an actress in this country. She visited me recently and was upset and embarressed about the attention to her looks that she gets wherever she goes....the grass is not always greener. Hope this helps hun xxx
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male
reader, Andy00 +, writes (13 July 2007):
 "What's wrong with Fat girls?" - Nothing!
Nothing is really wrong with fat women, only that they are obese, which can lead to physical problems for them. Other than that, there is no real reason for men to have anything against dating fat women. If they do, chances are, they are uncomfortable with what other people think of them, or possibly just shallow.
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female
reader, in my opinion +, writes (13 July 2007):
 hi
being big myself i also once thought that guys only liked skinny girls. trust me they dont!
ive had plenty of guys ask me out on dates and show interest! i guess it depends on maybe ur looking to find someone to much?
its a preference that not only guys have, some girls dont like bigger guys, it works both ways!
be proud to be who you are, and let ur confidence shine through.
all the best
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female
reader, Jendorset +, writes (13 July 2007):
Perhaps they show more interest in her because they think she will be easiest to get into bed. I never used to get noticed (when you do, its just annoying) but i was glad then when i did it was someone who genuinely liked me.
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female
reader, LynstHolin +, writes (13 July 2007):
Because guys in your age group are too worried about what their friends will think. I was considered 'too fat' in high school, and no one ever asked me out. When I graduated and got out into the real world, many men (not boys!) found me attractive, and I married the most wonderful of them.
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female
reader, Carina +, writes (13 July 2007):
 Well, I identify with you completely because I've always been large and I also live in South Africa. Unfortunately a lot of South African guys do seem to prefer thin girls. Frankly, they're missing out on something good. I'm old enough to remember when British guys thought like that too. They were brainwashed by the media. Luckily that's changed in the last twenty years and now there are loads of men admitting that they've always liked bigger women.
So, I'm certain that underneath it all there are many South African guys who really fancy curvy and fatter women. Think of it this way: if someone is shallow enough to worry what size you are then they're not worth knowing. Be proud of who you are and look around you at all the gorgeous big beautiful women in the world. Keep confident and keep loving yourself and you'll soon meet someone genuine enough to admit he fancies you like mad. There are millions of them out there. Promise!
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female
reader, O Connor  +, writes (13 July 2007):
 hey hun im a believer that guys find curvier girls more attractive and i think its sexier to have a womanly figure!!u sound like u have alot of self confidence and wen the right guys come along they in turn will notice this and love you!!!obviously the guys that u speak of that are attracted to your friend are not worth anyones time and defo not your worrying!be happy smile and dont worry about wat guys are overlooking you - just be happy that the one who wont is the on that is worth it!
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female
reader, love-him +, writes (13 July 2007):
 Hi babe, ive learnt to understand many men prefere the bigger, women to the skinny ones.. its becoming more and more common now-a-days.. like midge said, if a man isnt noticing you then dont bother worrying about them.. u will find the right person.. sooner or later =)
I hope i helped =)
Mail me if you would like to talk x
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female
reader, Straight Up +, writes (13 July 2007):
 some boy or men like thin girl personally i think girl with curve and meat on them look better.
i'm curvy and junky and i wouldn't changed my size for the world so don't worry about it somebody will come your way
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female
reader, Midge +, writes (13 July 2007):
 If people arent taking notice of you when you are well groomed, regardless if you are a big girl, then they really arent worth loosing sleep over.
I am not the smallest person in the world and what you see is what you get. If they dont like it, tell someone that cares 'cause I dont! I am what I am and what you see is what you get!
You are still very young, so I wouldnt concern myself about it just now. Just have fun and most importantly be yourself! Dont let the vision of what other people perceive to be the "perfect" man or woman loose you sleep! Us big girls can be just as much fun as the skinny ones, and if people cant see that, then they genuinely are not worth the hassle.
I know that South Africa can sometimes be very focused on the slimmer figure, and I never conformed to that. However, I never tried to, because this is me and if you dont like what you see, make sure the door doesnt hit your backside on the wayout!
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female
reader, hugs2muchgal +, writes (13 July 2007):
 There is nothing wrong with being "fat". Some guys wants women with more meat on their bones and some want model thin. In high school though most boys look for atheletic girls and well, boobs. Simple as that. By the time you are in college, you'll find more people who appreciate you for who you are, not what you look like.
And this might not be what you want to hear, but maybe it's your personality driving guys off. Guys like girls who are confident in themselves. What you've done in this post is put down your bestfriend to make yourself look better. Guys HATE when girls compare themselves to other girls (or atleast the guys I know do). Besides, what kind of friend thinks bad things about another, your friend could have a great personality that shows which could be attracting the guys.
You have to learn to love the body you've been given and since you say you take care of yourself, continue to eat right and excercise and you will find a guy who will love you more than any of your "skinny" friends.
Good luck.
-Hugs
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female
reader, Ask_HanBan +, writes (13 July 2007):
 Nothings wrong!
being curvy is so kwl! guys like curves!
maybe because of all the media attention on skinny celebs and wat great "sex appeal" they have!
i personally think curves are kwl but i'm just saying that because i am curvy.
but be proud of ur figure,
when curves come in, you'll be there!
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