A
female
age
36-40,
*tonestaughtmetofly
writes:Is my boyfriend a pedophile for looking at cartoon porn depicting very young children? We've been going out for 6 months and since we've moved in together I've been secretly snooping on his laptop and have found many things that have disturbed me. Lots of rape porn, shemale and bestiality also, but the most disturbing of all that has left me very shaken is his interest in cartoons depicting toddlers and babies having sex with adults. Also, he reads stories about men molesting little girls. I love him a lot, but I keep getting disgusted by these things I find and I haven't confronted him about it because I don't want to admit I snooped and humiliate him ,but what I find greatly disturbs me and I don't know what to do. I keep thinking its just fantasy stuff and it doesn't mean anything but I can't get the images out of my mind and I think I may be in denial. I have no one to turn to about this since it's quite embarrassing for me, and I want to scream at him but so far I haven't told him I've been snooping on him. what should I do?I really need advice, I'm so distraught over this. He seems to only watch really disgusting types of porn, and I've losing respect and some love for him over it.
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female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (27 June 2013):
 @asnon of June 27th : then I am afraid that your knowledge is incomplete.
In 2003 the Us Congress passed a law subjecting obscene depictions of fictional minors to the same legal standards as actual child pornography.
It's called 18 USC 1466A. It refers to visual depictions of ANY kind, including drawings, cartoons, sculptures and paintings.Regardless of. the realism of the depiction.
Of course , for not being obscene , thereby not illegal, it should have, at least in the eyes of the judge,
"SERIOUS artistic level " - on par with, say, Picasso . . A masterpiece.
It's a seldom enforced law, I agree. I guess the courts are busy with other stuff. But I know two cases of guys who got the book thrown at them for lolicon. One was in Iowa, a guy named Chris Handley. The other in Virginia, guy named Duane Whorley. He got 20 years.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 June 2013): @CindyCares, to my knowledge there are no laws about cartoon porn or hentai/lolicon in the US. We have freedom of speech here.As general advice, there's nothing wrong with having a fetish for lolicon or cartoon porn. The people who are into that draw a big red line between 2D porn and real child porn. Most of them are not pedophiles, except in the most technical sense, because they're not attracted to real children and abuse. In drawn porn, sexual features are exaggerated and drawn out of proportion. It is a problem if he obsesses over it or if he's attracted to real children.You never have to tolerate a fetish that makes you feel uncomfortable. If someone you're dating is into lolicon/hentai, and it weirds you out or makes you feel unsafe, then tell him so. You can break up with him. But don't beat someone up over it.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2012): He has a mental problem and needs support. Confront him and say that if he want's to see you he needs to see a specialist. He may have been abused as a child. Male survivors sometime have problems with porn. Since they feel weak and like they have been dominated, they seek images of domination. If you love him then help him, but also keep yourself safe. He needs a professional but also someone for external support. This is going to hurt him he knows this is wrong. If he faces this it will be painful.
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female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (17 April 2012):
@Pedo Bear 666: Isn't there in USA a pornography law banning the depiction of fictitious or cartoon characters drawn to look like minors engaging in sexual acts ?...
Yes, I know there's no specific law against lolicons- but there's one about diffusion of obscenity.Particularly involving minors.
Make sure that some cute little judge does not decide that you'd better spend some time in a cute little jail .
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male
reader, PedoBear666 +, writes (17 April 2012):
Ok... Don't worry, he is not a pedophile. He is just watching anime. There are many kind of animes out there. The ones he watch is called "lolicon" or maybe "siscon".
Lolicon is when there is a cute little girl that has sex or maybe just make out. Siscon is when a guy has sex with his little sister. Don't bother confronting him. I watch it too.
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female
reader, peacelovecandy +, writes (25 March 2012):
 He sounds like a normal guy for the most part. Some people watch strange porn and get a laugh out of it, it doesn't necessarily mean he was turned on. You can't possibly call the police on him for finding it on his laptop when hundreds of other people are also watching it - possibly cracking up! I would just confront him - without acting angry. The stories are a bit strange, unless they are on the news. If he reads them from some type of erotic story site, things will have a twist.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 March 2012): Be an honourable person and do the right thing; report him to the police. I hope predators like him all go to jail, and drop the soap.
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reader, Vikki0611  +, writes (4 March 2012):
OKOK .. HERE'S THE THING ... The question is ... Do you want kids??? Could you have them with him knowing what you have seen withou thinking an awful thought...? If not then why Have the fall out.... Your life .. Your wants, thoughts and feelings.. If you can't just move on he's not your "problem" to solve. You have to have complete trust... Or really, what is the point? X
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reader, malletchick76 +, writes (4 March 2012):
 Bring it to his attention immediately. As some of the other aunts and guy posters have mentioned, he might not be completely aware, just focused on the arousal state. If he becomes defensive, that is a warning sign. Get him to professional counseling as soon as possible.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2012): What I was taught- As a man thinketh, so is he.
When we entertain thoughts of lust, it isn't too long when the lust and desire builds to the degree that men and women are willing to cross the line from fantasy to reality and ACT on such desires.
To Catch a Predator is a prime example when porn falls into the wrong hands.
I say this man is on a path where he treads that fine line.
I have no problem reporting such a man and then leaving him.
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male
reader, Beingblack +, writes (3 March 2012):
 I am not convinced that your boyfriend is a paedophile, but I do know he has some very serious issues.
As many aunts here have suggested, there are hundreds of 'types' of porn, and most people will only watch the type that turns them on.
If he watches, (and keeps) cartoon, or any kind of child pornography, you need to make him aware that you have this knowledge, and see how he reacts. What are you afraid of? Him? If so, the issues go far deeper than porn.
I love sex, and watch porn from from time to time, last time about three months ago with my partner. I also watch only a certain type, everything else turns me off completely.
If I found out that anyone ( and I do mean anyone) in my circle of family and friends watched cartoon child porn, I would batter them. I'm not sure I could help myself, thats how strongly I personally feel about child porn.
Children should be allowed to grow into young adults without fear of abuse of any kind, and those who take advantage of a TODDLER need help. A man who gets off on this type of porn needs help just as much.
The only question you need to ask is when you confront him today, right now, in an hour, the next hour or the next. I'm not sure what you're waiting for.
Also, I am sorry to say that I really dont know what drives a person to snoop on someone else's laptop. I personally find that behaviour disgusting.
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reader, Miamine +, writes (3 March 2012):
 "Example... you are a black lady, right , Miamine ?. Suppose that you find your caucasian bf saved on his PC a lot of videos about black women being raped, battered, debased, humiliated. Supposed he has a slave market fantasy and fantasizes about torturing and flogging black slaves."(cindycares)
Fantasy, staged, fine, battering is illegal and he should go to jail. ummmm... I read erotica, I've come across them stories before. Nope, doesn't cause me problems and I don't assume that anyone reading such things are part of the Nazi party. Them kind of erotica are read by women too. Lesbians I hear are very into S&M and that's what that category of porn comes under. S&M is into equality, they torture their men too, and anal rape them (fantasy), but again, no-one has an issue with that. The guy who has slave porn, doesn't actually own a slave, that is left to the men who run perfectly legal companies. Most modern day slaves are owned by very rich families in cities like London, most of them are very religious and don't look at porn at all. I wouldn't deem somebody a racist because he has strange porn, I'd deem him a because he like's the Nazi's or has very offensive views on black people. The porn is immaterial. Black guys look at rape porn of black women, are they racist to themselves.
As I've said, the guy has animal porn, which is illegal, how come nobody worries about that? In fantasy, people do all types of strange things. Yes it's probably immoral to write down or video, but it doesn't go away, and if it's legal then many people have considered it, and deemed it acceptable. You can't create thought crime and remove the impulse some people have to think about such things, unfortunately.
Should you date such a guy? Tough call. But you should make your choices with a full consideration of all the facts. Don't think I could date him, because the stuff on his computer would always be in my mind and that would spoil the relationship.
Campaign to change laws if you want this sort of stuff stopped, probably the best thing to do. But if you think you can protect yourself, by saying, that person who looks is evil, that person who doesn't is good, you are fooling yourself. Probably the people who like to look at this stuff the most, are teenage boys who shouldn't be looking at all.
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reader, Miamine +, writes (3 March 2012):
Probably my problem is I've seen a lot of paedophiles, and spoken to abused children and adults.If I was looking for a paedophile, it would be your husbands, your brothers, the guy at church I'd be looking for. The guy holding the bible or the school book is the one to watch out for. People like to overemphasise the stranger danger, the guy with funny porn. Most kids are killed by their parents, most paedophiles are already in your family.NO most child molesters and rapist look just like you. And could even be some people on the board giving advice. I've seen children pushed to kiss "dear uncle" or sent to stay with "nice grandpa"... how do I spot an abuser, by the way the children cringe away when their parents force them to go to some family guy they don't like at all. By the way their extra child friendly, but their eyes or always on the kids, not on the grown women (or men) with tits. Or the male teacher who no young girl will take detention from. No adults ever seem to notice this behaviour, and there never seems to be anyone to tell.Adults who think that paedophiles live in a strange world of strange things are the biggest danger to kids. And kids don't like when you shout about such things, then they keep everything secret. It's always best to be calm when talking about paedophilia.Sorry I'll stop now.
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reader, CindyCares +, writes (3 March 2012):
Of course he may have some, or even several, good qualities. I read a biography of Ted Bundy , the serial killer, and under many respects he was an outstanding guy. His employers appreciated him, his colleagues loved him, he even volunteered lots of his time to a famous helpline for people in distress. He still was Ted Bundy.
But,ok, this is an extreme example, your guy may never come even remotely close to act out his fantasies. And ?
I guess the question is " can, or should, you judge people for what they think " ? I think, yes, in certain cases you could and you should.
Most of the times I agree with Miamine's opinions , but not this one. First, what a person thinks about and focuses his interests and curiosities on, says a heck of a lot about him /her. He may be " just curious " , but one wonders WHY and how can he be curious about things that would make most of the world vomit.
Second, there are some issues where one can't be just a neutral observer. There's no neutrality, because being neutral IS taking a stand. It's like condoning, or implying that's not a big deal, or that these things could be allowed to pass . There are issues that ,when you are not speaking against them, you are speaking FOR, just by your silence.
Example... you are a black lady, right , Miamine ?. Suppose that you find your caucasian bf saved on his PC a lot of videos about black women being raped, battered, debased, humiliated. Supposed he has a slave market fantasy and fantasizes about torturing and flogging black slaves.
But, in real life, he 's a nice guy. He treats you well, remembers your birthdays ,bring you flowers.
Would you still feel the same about him ? Would you think he is just curious and his fantasies are innocuous ?
I doubt you would, and if you were... you'd help perpetuating racism. Change begins with changing THOUGHTS, and as long as we say that anything people thinks is fine with us if they don't act on it,... we are helping perpetuate the actions.
Of course I guess this guy did not choose voluntarily to be turned on by child porn and can't do much about it, unless he embarks on lengthy, intensive therapy. but the OP CAN disassociate from this crap, and the men who like it.
If you are against drugs, you don't date a drug dealer. If you are an animal lover, you don't date a vivisectionist.
Your life is about your choices, and your choices include not only what you fight against, but also what you decide to NOT fight.
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2012): You can look at online porn without downloading it, right? If your bf is only curious it seems to me he wouldn't have it on his computer. The fact that he downloaded all this stuff is what's most disturbing to me. Personally, I find it repulsive and cannot imagine wanting to be with someone who is so interested in toddler porn that he's downloaded it to his computer. I don't know him at all, of course, but I have to wonder if his comments about hating to see women in pain and so on are attempts to deflect you from his real interests. And if some of the other posters are correct and he's watching this stuff because he was abused in the past, then he really needs to get help.
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reader, Shadow Rose +, writes (3 March 2012):
 I agree with Miamine. Dont just jump the gun. I mean, my boyfriend likes to tease me and say that he likes to kick corgis, just because he knows it'll make me mad, and he's an asshat sometimes (But I love him, because I'm an asshat to him too sometimes). You dont see me calling ASPCA on him.
Talk to him about it. Apologize for snooping, but tell him you were disturbed by the porn you found.
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reader, Miamine +, writes (3 March 2012):
It's a big decision you have to make, one that affects your life (and his) no-one else. Just to remind you, the guy has bestiality porn, rape porn, shemale porn and carton porn of kids having sex with adults....
Paedophiles aren't turned on by bestiality or adult rape or shemales. They are only turned on by children.
The guy has some strange sexual porn, some of it is illegal, much of it is immoral. How will you feel if you leave? Can you stand to look at him if you stay?
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reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (3 March 2012):
 One of my friends was living next to a pedophile. Her parents thought he was a kind, good-natured, gentle old man. No one in the neighborhood suspected that he was a pedo. Just because you're a pedophile doesn't mean you're a horrible person. You may do horrible things, you may have a vie sexual preference, but it doesn't mean that your entire character is a list of negatives. All serial killers, pedophiles, rapists, ect have some good traits. They are people after all, and people are complex. We all have good and bad traits. Of course your boyfriend has some good characteristics. He's human after all! At the same time, just because he has some positive traits doesn't mean that he is not a sexual creep. Just because he has some pros and you love him doesn't mean you should stay with him. You have to realize that the two are not mutually exclusive.
I was once in contact with a pedophile and I didn't know it at the time. He was very intelligent, creative, funny and witty. I never thought in a million years that he was stalking and manipulating teenagers online, but there it was. Sometimes you need to look at the facts and stop tying to fit people into these ridiculous good and evil categories. Pedophiles are just people with a serious and unacceptable sexual preference. Could you in all honestly have your youngest family members, or friend's kids around this man without some hesitation and worry?
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2012): RUN RUN RUN as fast as you can! Even criminals can be nice... but eewwww your boyfriend is too twisted. RUN honey, RUN
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reader, anonymous, writes (3 March 2012): If he is sexually aroused by images, cartoon or otherwise of men sexually molesting toddlers and babies. And he likes reading material about men sexually molesting little girls, then he is a paedophile. And I agree with you, you are definitely in denial. He has a sickness and he doesnt want help or he would seek it. You can not help him, you will just be dragged down with him. He is not the man he appears to be, so dont be fooled by his `nice` persona. Underneath, he is rotten. If I were you, I would leave now before you become any more involved than you already are.
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reader, Mr Anonymous +, writes (3 March 2012):
I've got to say I share a similar view to Miamine.
Of course he may very well be a "pervert" (the definition of which will change from person to person)and even possibly a paedophile, and the images you found may be indicative of this.
I do however think that the majority of the posters here have completely jumped the gun and made pretty serious accusations about a person they know very little about.
Try to picture something about yourself that you keep secret, whether its something you do or something you think, and you know a fair amount of people would find it unpleasant. Most people, if not all, have something like this (as Miamine stated). Now imagine that a group of people that you have never met you are told only this one "dark" secret of yours, and know nothing else about you...what do you think they might say?
Many posters here are so confident in their assertions that they are essentially saying:
"There is no possibility that your boyfriend could have just been bored/curious"
This of course is just crazy....2 girls 1 cup anyone? How many people have seen this? Why, because of arousal? Er no,I think I would be right in saying the majority did so out of curiosity.
Only the OP here knows this man. Does he have other strange or worrying behaviour? Any known psychological issues? If his actions are that of a decent guy who has got his sh*t together, I doubt there is anything wrong that requires you to "call the police" as suggested by some responses...
I think you should definitely talk to him as this will play on your mind, whether you leave him or not. He might go on the defensive as he will no doubt be very embarrassed, but just try to approach it calmly if possible. If his answer is good enough for YOU and you trust him, then I don't think that you need to leave him. If you don't trust him and feel edgy about this still, I think you need to break it off.
Good luck,
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reader, Miamine +, writes (3 March 2012):
Here is a link I think you should read:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_status_of_cartoon_pornography_depicting_minors
Child cartoon porn is considered illegal in most countries.
I am actually reading the link, and it's a bit more complicated than that. Many countries have a qualifier, are the cartoons realistic or not. In some countries you can go to jail for sexual images of the yellow children in the Simpsons, in other countries you can't.
Anyway it's all besides the point, if the guy is looking at beastality porn, then that is something illegal.
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reader, stonestaughtmetofly +, writes (2 March 2012):
stonestaughtmetofly is verified as being by the original poster of the questionSome of these responses have been harsh, but then again if it wasn't happening to me I'd probably respond the exact same way.
I'm confused and divided because my boyfriend is the sweetest man I've ever been with, he's attentive, supportive, loving, gentle. He makes me feel loved and secure, and says things that completely contradict what I find him watching - he says he'd kill anyone who'd hurt a child, he hates seeing women in pain, etc.
I suppose I cant come to the realization he might not be who I think he is and its extremely painful, so I needed outside voices to remind me of what to do. Thanks for the answers, I know what I need to do in my mind but its' still hard since I love him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): I find it disturbing you snoop and find it acceptable!!!! Stop the habit NOW!!!!
Also, he's a weirdo so get rid of him.
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reader, DanceInTheDark  +, writes (2 March 2012):
 Run. Run fast.
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reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (2 March 2012):
 Get away. Stay away. Call the police. That is sick behavior with the cartoons. Read up on pedophiles. Many have a version of child porn on their computer. Thats awful. He needs serious help
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): Here is a link I think you should read:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Legal_status_of_cartoon_pornography_depicting_minors
Child cartoon porn is considered illegal in most countries. How is he getting this porn anyway?
YOu need to leave him. If he hasn't acted out on his fantasy, there is the potential that one day he could.
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reader, CindyCares +, writes (2 March 2012):
Child porn ? TODDLER porn ?
" I keep thinking it's just fantasy and does not mean anything ". Yeah, it only means he's a sick bastard and you'd better stay way clear of him.
Maybe he was abused as a child, that's sad but it is his problem, yours is to disassociate yourself from this kind of filth and do not enable / endorse / facilitate it with the excuse that, until it stays in his mind only, nobody gets hurt. So ? If you had a boyfriend who gets a massive boner everytime he sees, say, a documentary about Nazi death camps and the treatment of those unfortunate prisoners , would you not have a problem with that, also if there's no chance that he could ever open his own little Nazi camp ? If your answer is : No as long as it's fantasy it is fine with me .... then maybe you have a problem too.
I don't care if I sound judgemental or if it sounds that I want to censure thoughts, yes, maybe that's exactly what I want to do- you've got to draw the line somewhere!, it can't always be " anything goes because it's the free expression of a personal mental and emotional world "- who cares, if this is his world, - let's all make sure that he keeps his filthy digusting degrading world well, well away from that of regular folks.
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reader, mystiquek +, writes (2 March 2012):
 I would have been horrified if I found something like that on my mate's computer. Sickened beyond belief. I agree with the other aunts/uncles. You didn't need to ask us if something was wrong, you already knew it was. This man has some serious problems going on, far deeper than what you can help him with. How you can stand to let him touch you is beyond my imagining. I wouldn't even try to explain why you are ending things, just end it and GET OUT NOW!
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reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (2 March 2012):
 I have NO problems with PORN…. I have problems with KIDDIE porn. I have problems with porn that are about rape and beatings…
There is something SERIOUSLY wrong with this man you love…
He needs serious therapy and help and it’s beyond what a loving woman can provide. I strongly encourage you to tell him that he needs to get help and I recommend that if at all possible you end this relationship…
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): Agreed. He could face charges, fines, and jail time where his porn viewing is going.
This is common decline in morality when porn leads from 'mainstream' porn to deviant and unnatural porn habits aka beastiality and pedophile themes, let alone rape.
The mainstream porn no longer excites his lust to now he has to venture to things, perhaps he normally would have been repulsed by.
I say walk away from him. He has an addiction and most likely views porn way too much to get that same 'high' sexual excitement before getting off via masturbation.
Most healthy men do NOT need porn to masturbate to.
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reader, Miamine +, writes (2 March 2012):
I don't think your boyfriends a paedophile. Paedophiles usually look at sexual pictures of young children (not babies) and they don't bother with shemale's or bestiality, because it's children they are interested in. Bestiality pornography as far as I know is illegal, cartoons of babies having sex (lolicon as Jannipeg describes it) are not illegal, because they are cartoons, not real images and you can't hurt cartoons. Same issue came up when they tried to ban The Sims, because it was possible to make them nude and watch them having sex. Sexual images of real children having sex is also illegal.
The list of pornography your boyfriend watches, bestiality, shemale's, lolicon, rape, doesn't make me think he's been abused or is a sick pervert, what it points to is a man who has watched so much pornography that he is bored and he keeps looking for more and more extreme images to turn him on. There is no indication that he will rape women or horses or start to fancy little babies. Instead he'll eventually get so bored that he'll give up on porn altogether. There is no indication that these things even arouse him or he uses them for masturbation purposes. It's more likely that he's bored and curious, rather than perverted and horny.
How do you tackle it, seeing as you've invaded his privacy and are now upset because you didn't expect to actually see the dirty corners of his mind. I suggest you don't tell him. Spying on people isn't nice, and as you found out, you often find things you didn't want to know. Same if someone managed to find out all your secrets, everybody on earth has something they don't want anyone to know. I suggest you try to talk to him about sexual fantasies, you tell him one of yours, something probably you've never admitted, then he tells you one of his. It won't be anything about the porn, them is not his fantasies and he probably sees them as harmless but knows that society will judge him. The whole point is to create a position of open discovery and honest discussion about sex. Once you two can start talking about that, then you get a chance to say you find things like shemale, lolicon, bestiality, rape fantasies disgusting and you would leave a guy in a second if you ever found him looking at that stuff.
Hopefully he will take the hint and clear his computer right away, and stop looking at such disturbing stuff. When it comes to fantasies, people like all kinds of weird stuff, just like some women like to dream about having sex with unicorns, or many women have rape fantasies themselves, it doesn't mean that you got to be careful with women and horses or many women are out there dying to get sexually assaulted. The idea that you can know all of somebodies secrets, all their hidden desires and you know every corner of their mind is unrealistic. People have past secrets that they don't even admit to themselves and desires that only come out in their dreams, things about themselves they fight hard to deny. That's why Freud talks about the hidden subconscious.
Read Nancy Friday, that's an eye opener about Women and fantasy, and they like all the stuff your guy likes and more. Now go and try to create the space for you to tell him what is allowed and not allowed in your relationship.
If you don't trust the guy and have to snoop on him, you really didn't know him well enough to move in and live with him after only 6months. Be glad you didn't find only stories of raping and killing women on there.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): Actually I should have just said this:
Do you seriously have to ask us whether a guy that fantasizes about raping children, is a paedophile? You really have to ask whether that's the case? Really?
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reader, person12345 +, writes (2 March 2012):
 Who other than people who rape, pedophilia, and animal rape arousing (rather than horrifying) are the ones watching this kind of stuff? I do not buy this whole argument that if someone is aroused by it, it's alright so long as it's arousing. Sorry to say it but anyone who can watch children, animals, and women being raped and find it arousing rather than horrifying and sickening needs help. No matter what. Perhaps janniepeg is right that he was sexually abused as a child, but either he needs to get help or you need to leave. If he ever decided to act on any of these "fantasies," someone will get hurt. You don't want that to be you or any of your loved ones.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 March 2012): Yeah, he's a grade A paedophile.
"Is my boyfriend a pedophile for looking at cartoon porn depicting very young children?"
Yes, that's the very definition of being a paedophile. I mean come on, what kind of person likes to look at even cartoons of children being raped? Or read stories about that kind of sick crap?
You're in love with a sick paedophile who also gets off on rape.
Forgive me OP but what the hell are you confused about? Why are you here asking us what to do about your guy who fantasizes about raping children? Why are you still with this sick freak?
That lolicon crap is classed as child porn here in Ireland and people who download that kind of crap are legally considered paedophiles because that's what they are. Even stories of such crimes that are not used in an academic sense or protected under artist laws are illegal.
Forget past abuse or any of that other bullshit OP, you're not here asking why he is a paedoscum, you're asking what you should do, not to make excuses for him. So again I ask your own question right back at you. What do you think you should do? Be an idiot that lets "love" keep her in a relationship with a guy like this? Or do the sensible thing? Your choice.
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reader, janniepeg +, writes (2 March 2012):
 He could be sexually abused as a child. The porn he sees helps him feel in control. Your view of him probably changed from boyfriend to victim, someone who needs your compassion. I have tried to love a man like that but gave up because he would rather choose to live with his heart closed, and I suspect when the damage was too great a person could never be cured. Sexually abused people do want to have normal relationships, but found out that the other partner will never satisfied because you don't feel loved by them, you don't feel a real connection. Lolicon is prohibited in Canada by not in the US. In my view he is doing something unlawful because lolicon does promote child violence in real life. I do understand people who get secretly aroused by accidentally coming across a picture of a child sitting on a man's lap. But downloading LOTS of questionable porn is something else, and you should be worried.
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reader, YouWish +, writes (2 March 2012):
 OMG...yeah, there is something wrong with your boyfriend. I didn't even know they made cartoon toddler porn! I would as fast as you can break up with him and one of you move out. Going out for 6 months is too soon to be moving in together anyways!
He's bringing in child porn. What if you had a niece or nephew or even had children of your own? If he's sexually attracted to them, you're opening their lives to being molested, and this is how it starts.
I would also talk to your parents and trusted family about this as well. These things (child porn, bestiality) are illegal. If he ever used your computer and downloaded child porn onto it, he would put you at risk for jail time for having child porn.
Sorry this happened, and I would be distraught too. This isn't mere fantasy that he can have in private. This is no good. Molestation and bestiality isn't some victimless crime.
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