Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, daletom  +, writes (23 August 2008):
An anonymous guy wrote:
" Original poster, now try saying you only want to be with a fellow virgin yourself. Try making this a prerequisite for poeple you date without being picked-on for it.
See if your virginity still gets all this respect from the crowd once you try to make it carry any actual weight. "
Something similar was discussed in the thread "Suffering because of my virginity - but it is my choice to be a virgin, until I meet my ideal girl. Do you think she exists?" at http://www.dearcupid.org/question/suffering-because-of-my-virginity---but.html .
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2008): Everybody loves to pat a virgin on the back when it doesn't cost them anything.
Original poster, now try saying you only want to be with a fellow virgin yourself. Try making this a prerequisite for poeple you date without being picked-on for it.
See if your virginity still gets all this respect from the crowd once you try to make it carry any actual weight.
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A
male
reader, inzlo +, writes (18 August 2008):
inzlo is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thanks guys/girls your answers helped out alot. Ever since I was 10 I thought about getting married to my dream girl(whatever that means)pretty girlish I guess. You've all helped keep me encouraged to keep looking.
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A
female
reader, Milana +, writes (17 August 2008):
It's nothing to be ashamed about. Just keep up the willpower and don't let someone try and manipulate you into having sex just so they feel more powerful. There are many conniving people out there. Hopefully you will find someone special that has this in common with you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2008): absolutely nothing wrong... kudos to the lucky girl
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A
female
reader, wildchica5687 +, writes (16 August 2008):
In my opinion I give you mad props!!! I'm quite impressed with a guy or girl who can still hold onto their virginity even after high school and they are in their twenties. I know I've heard from my boyfriend the crap that his guy friends would give him, but just hang in there. In my opinion, you did nothing wrong. Plus you don't have to worry about dieases!! :)
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A
female
reader, hannah76  +, writes (14 August 2008):
 And just to add....make a girl "earn" your virginity! H x
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A
female
reader, MidtownToDowntown  +, writes (14 August 2008):
It's a turn on!
You're proving to us that there are males out there who don't feel the need to screw everything with a vagina!
No woman will think negatively about it!
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A
female
reader, RogersK +, writes (14 August 2008):
I think it's admirable and unbelievably awesome that a 23 year old man would still be a virgin. There is so much pressure out there for guys to give it away and the fact that someone has kept that and not just thrown it to any girl is like so many of these ladies said, a huge turn on. I would be thrilled if I found a 23 year old virgin! So, awesome for you!!
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A
female
reader, hannah76 +, writes (14 August 2008):
Hi,
It's a turn on...plain and simple! hannah xxx
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A
male
reader, daletom +, writes (14 August 2008):
(A former 23-yr-old-virgin-guy replies)
More than you expect will be attracted to you. A few will be intimidated, often because they know their own early sexual activities were a mistake. And, truth be known, some will be turned-off by it.
But your sexual history is NOT tattooed on your forehead, and it's almost certainly not what you talk about on the first date. Don't assume that any particular girl will either prefer you, or reject you, based on your condition until the relationship has progressed to the point of specifically discussing it. Worry about the problem when it IS a problem.
I was once a 23-yr old virgin. The girl who took my virginity gave me hers in exchange - and we were BOTH quite pleased with the circumstances of that transaction!! We have been married (to each other) for 34 years.
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A
female
reader, puds123 +, writes (14 August 2008):
we think its a really great thing!!! a women will be more likely to trust u because she knows for not just after one thing and that you realise that sex is much more than just sex! =D
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A
female
reader, RitzaD. +, writes (14 August 2008):
 we think the best of them! So many young boys are worried about losing it before they get out of high school rather than being worried about graduating high school. =/
Any women would appreciate and feel turned on to the fact ur a virgen! if ur the type who wants a serious realtionship, then this girl has won her self the jackpot weather ur cute or not. Its just to rare to find a man ur age a virgin, but not rare to find a man ur age with some std/infection. It just says so much good about u, like for example: sex wasn't ur primary goal in life as to many who do set this as an achievement.
Just wondering, when u do decide to do it, are u looking for a virgin? Or the right one?
I could keep on going of what I think but u get the hint.
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A
female
reader, AskSusie  +, writes (14 August 2008):
It's definitely not a negative thing - sex is always very personal and should not be a topic which is taken so lightly. Good for you inzlo!
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A
female
reader, Jia  +, writes (14 August 2008):
 I think it's fabulous, too many men -- boys rather, loose their virginity too young! I think that a man who still has his virginity at 23 would (generally) be more considerate of what a woman wants when it comes to sex, not just groping the boobs first 'cause that's how how it went in a porno!
I agree with Tremor, looks aren't everything, like I mean a guy would have to be able to hold an intelligible conversation with me before I'd even consider f**king him, even if he was hot.
Anyways, good luck with whoever winds up being the lucky girl in the end, I'm sure you'll do just fine!
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A
female
reader, Honeygirl  +, writes (14 August 2008):
 Wow!!! A guy who is 23 and a virgin... so refreshing after reading about 12 and 13 year olds who seem to know more about sex than 35 or 40 year olds!! I am sure that when you meet the right woman she will really appreciate the fact that you are a virgin!
Honeygirl
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A
female
reader, Tremor +, writes (14 August 2008):
 A lot of women may well find it endearing - as Ruby said, it's a nice change from guys who have been banging since they were 13.
However, I don't like that being 'ugly or fat' are the only reasons you can come up with as to why a person might be a virgin. Looks are not the only important thing, as I'm sure (or at least, I hope), you realize.
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A
female
reader, superrrshawna +, writes (14 August 2008):
 honestly, i would find it a turn on. i don't necessarily like boys who have slept around. it means sex doesn't mean the same to them as it does to me, and we have different priorities in relationships!
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A
female
reader, RubyRouge +, writes (14 August 2008):
Personally, I think it's a refreshing change - so many guys lose their virginity so soon, and if you're still a virgin, for whatever reason, there's absolutely nothing wrong with it, and any woman who's worth losing it to will feel the same.
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