A
female
age
41-50,
*rowneyes1983
writes:whats happening????I met a guy on the net 2 years ago and we have become very close, get on wicked its unreal and we have a great connection... he says he loves me and wants to marry me... we havent even met each other yet!!!he occasionally spits his dummy out for no reason and dosent ring or text for days!!! what does this mean??Just recently we had a argument because i found out he as slept with someone else... while im sat around waiting to meet this guy because i do genuinly love him and i believe he feels the same, so i kicked off on the fone... and he said we're not married it has nothing to do with you.. but yet he tells me im his soul mate and now he is totally ignoring me, he knows this hurts me.. is he doing this on purpose or isnt he interested.. I've been waiting a long time to meet him but he hasnt come yet PLS NEED ADVICE ITS DRIVING ME NUTS, IM HEARTBROKEN
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female
reader, dreamingbella  +, writes (1 November 2010):
 If you decide to find out the truth instead of waiting for the answer. Then go for it but as many readers have given their own opinions as well as my own, you could get hurt.
Chatting online is completely different from taking a walk together and chatting about what you two just go across. Believe what i'm saying, it's different. I've known my fella over 3 years online. He's a world apart. Once we met, he's completely different from how i imagined about him. His voice, his walk and the way he reacts towards everything. So that's how i say virtual life and real life is not the same. Be practical my dear!
It doesn't mean people you met online are all rubbish. Only one works it out and makes it real is the one you deserve. If not, then that one is just an entertainment you ever had. Go out and you'll find men are out there. Who knows you would bump into a nice guy walking on the street instead of in a chat room!
One more info for you, my fella hasn't ever talked about "Love" or "Marriage" online. He only said, there're things need to be talked face to face. Once he only accepted that he likes me, that's all. And be sure to you, when we met, he told me he was with a woman months ago, then i told him i was with a guy a few weeks ago. That's normal i should say! Call it cheating when you're committed. If not, it's his own life as well as yours.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, browneyes1983 +, writes (31 October 2010):
browneyes1983 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank u bimbim....im kinda finding it hard to belive that he hasent no interest in me..becos hes made me feel like he has...has he/hasent he i really dont kno anymore...im gunna go to his home town and find out for myself once and for all maybe it be a bad idea i dont kno but i need to kno or im going to be left wondering wat if ;-)
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (31 October 2010):
 Why were you sitting around waiting to meet him? What a waste of a precious life ... sitting around waiting to meet somebody ... at last, after two years of sitting around waiting you have recieved something special, the opportunity to turn your life around, and instead of sitting around waiting you can now get on with living!
STEP AWAY FROM THE COMPUTER ... go outside, breathe the air, look at the sky, join a pottery group, learn the names of the different trees in your nearest park, sign up for a gourmet cookery class, get out there and start living, you dont need to have game players like this online prat in your life, if he spits the dummy and doesnt text for days, sleeps with other girls etc etc its an indication HE was not sitting around waiting to meet you.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek  +, writes (31 October 2010):
 This is the bad part about online romances....unless you really meet the person and get to know the person,they can tell you almost anything. And a "boyfriend" really isn't a "boyfriend" when you haven't even met the person. I'm sorry, I know this is very painful for you, but people get caught up in the romance of an online relationship, but being with someone online isn't the same as in the REAL world. In his mind, he wasn't cheating because you in a sense aren't REAL to him. I'm sorry. You are a fun little distraction to him, but in the end you didn't mean enough for him to be honest or faithful. So sad to sense, he wasn't interested enough to hold true to what he told you. He's not worth your tears.
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A
male
reader, mrvhappy +, writes (31 October 2010):
Maybe I'm wrong, but you havent met so how can he have cheated on you? This is only a "internet relationship". Its not a real one just virtual one...until you meet and agree to date etc
You cant have an online relationship and claim that you love/wanna marry someone until you have met them and spent time with them.
I mean most if not all relationships are based on "chemisrty" between 2 people and hopefully from that chemistry love/affection/trust etc developes with a view to moving the relationship to the next level and maybe one day marriage. But that CAN ONLY happen once you have met them and got to really know them.
In an online relationship, people are not always who they say they are/appear to be
Hope this helps
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A
female
reader, browneyes1983 +, writes (31 October 2010):
browneyes1983 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionsry denise i rated u wrong i was meant to rate u 5*
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A
female
reader, browneyes1983 +, writes (31 October 2010):
browneyes1983 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank u denise u made a lot of sense..altho he always says hes coming to see me,dosent actually mean he will i suppose...but y tell me he loves me and theres no other like me..i just dont get it......
JMTMJ.....he told me he had slept with the women becos i was on the fone to him and she wrang his other fone and he switched it off,and wen i asked who it was he told me and he said shes pestering him......wow how much of a mug am i ;-(.........thank u for ur replys x
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A
female
reader, Denise32 +, writes (31 October 2010):
 Unfortunately you have placed way too much faith in something that has no basis in the "real world."
His interest in you - sorry to say - just isn't there. If it was he would have tried to meet you in person a very long time ago.
Have you never heard that "talk is cheap" and "actions speak louder than words"?
Didn't you wonder why he never suggested meeting? On the other hand, why didn't YOU suggest meeting him?
Well, by now its a moot point. He spun you a fine tale with all his talk about soul mates and wanting to marry you but that's ALL it was: a web of deceit. In one way he's right: there was absolutely nothing to prevent him from sleeping with someone else. Had you two been dating for a while and agreed to be exclusive, THEN you would have had a strong case for bawling him out.
I'm sorry. You need to recognize this man had no intention of ever meeting you and developing a real relationship. I hope that in time, you can dry your tears and let it go.
If you are still in online dating sites, remember that after you exchange three to six emails with a match, then is the time to actually meet. If they're not willing to, then you have to conclude "he" is wasting your time........
Better luck with the next man......
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A
male
reader, Jmtmj +, writes (31 October 2010):
 How did you find out that he slept with someone else?
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