A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Can some of you please explain the mind set of today's young women in their early 20's?I am in my mid-30's and have recently entered the dating scene. Although I am 35, I am in great physical condition and most people say I look 25. I married my high school sweetheart, who was the only girlfriend I ever had. She passed away of cancer 2 years ago and until recently I did not feel emotionally stable enough to think about dating. I miss her so much...Well I went on some blind dates that were set up by friends and family. A family member set me up with a 32 year old professional woman and we really hit it off. We had a normal date and parted that evening and went home.Next, some friends at work set me up with 2 dates recently, one girl was 22 and the other was 23 years old.Both girls were smart and very attractive which brings me to my question.On the very first and last date with both girls, they attempted to give me oral sex. On the first date! When I dated my wife, we were together for almost 9 months before our relationship moved to that level. I thought the first date was a fluke, so I politely explained that I appreciated the effort but I had to work early the next day. So I got out of it.The very next date with the 22 year old, the same thing happened. We had dinner and a movie and during conversation I let it slip that I was older than 30. When I dropped her back at her place she started to unzip my pants. I asked her why she was doing that and she said that she liked me a lot and that it's what's expected of girls these days. She said because I am in my 30's I am out of touch with what the kids do these days. She said I should "check out this new thing called the Internet. Oral sex is all over it and its perfectly natural."Is this what has happened to girls in the year 2010??
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female
reader, scythe  +, writes (22 February 2010):
 That's quite shocking! Were you in a suggestive location, such as a bed?
I would never consider any form of sexual contact on the first date, except for a polite kiss.
I can't speak for all ladies my age though (early 20's).
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (21 February 2010):
 Each succeeding generations have become more and more permissive with the easy availability of smut and porn through the internet.Our society is becoming more decadent .
The new sexual revolution and the morality has all fallen below the ocean. Peer pressure could be another contributing factor.
I believed there are some girls in some places who thinks it is the norm.
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A
male
reader, bharat mehta  +, writes (21 February 2010):
 What female reader,'Angzw' mentioned in a single statement,'That's why they are calling it the porno generation!' is true to large extent.
Of course, internet give good knowledge about sex also, all about esoteric tradition of ancient civilization, about pagan culture of Greece and of Indus Valley civilization. All about spiritual aspect of sexual life, but such material and good comments on it, remain as unacknowledged.
One philosopher has observed, that modern culture has loss grasp on reasoning mind. People do not see unity of sex and love. Modern thinkers say, enlightenment is fraud, than what is it we may termed as 'frank?'
All want sex, without learning how to respect and admire? Without learning how to see the 'person' within an 'Individual' we call the 'PERSONALITY'
Anyway, this site 'CUPID' is relevant with ancient civilization. Cupid is all about desire, and knowledge of desire...which is philosophy.
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A
female
reader, Stayc63088 +, writes (20 February 2010):
 Nah you just happened to pick out 2 immature whores, excuse my language. Or atleast exhibiting whore-ish behavior. I am 21 and wait about 3-4 dates before even kissing a guy... So it isn't all of us. I mean I would agree a lot more girls are giving it up easily nowadays according to stories from my male friends. But not all of em as you can tell from the many posts from females here who do not. But like the last poster said, please don't group all of us young ladies together :)
PS- Kudos to you on declining! Nice to see that men can turn down a girl basically throwing themselves at them! You truly give me hope for guys in this not so great time I am going through.
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A
female
reader, marder  +, writes (19 February 2010):
 This is not the "tramp generation". Perhaps all men are disgusting pigs. It doesn't seem fair to lump all men into one category, does it? Please don't do it for women.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010): I'm 25 and i haven't given oral sex, or had intercourse , at all !. So , no, not all women in their twenties are like that, thank god ! : )
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A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (18 February 2010):
 Hi there - personally, me (being 23) would never give oral sex on the first date. Not the second, third or fourth. My fella had to wait a looong time before we got to that point. But, that's not to say that I don't know PLENTY of girls who would do that kind of thing - a lot of my friends most certainly would and have in the past. I don't judge them, but it is difficult watching your friends indulging in such risky (kind of icky) situations.
For you, I would keep your mindset strong and definitely don't start expecting this kind of behavior. Show women that you respect them and value getting to know them. Show them that you like them for who they are, not the grade of ass they give out. You'll find a classy woman who isn't out to snag a guy by giving him sexual favors. As for the 'quick-to-please' ladies, not all women are like that, but there's DEFINITELY a handful who are.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (18 February 2010):
I know so truly wonderful girls my own age (early twenties) who don't act this way. Some do because they think it's normal. Don't give up, just make sure you take your time getting to know women.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2010): I'm a female in my mid 20's and even though I'm not considered that "old" there are a few things I have noticed amongst younger women.
First off, there are SO MANY attractive young ladies these days. Women (by nature) are competitive with each other, so this automatically causes them to fight for attention from guys. One way women compete against each other is to act slutty or very sexual toward men... this is how they "beat out" their component(another woman.)
Most women have self esteem issues. This causes them to become physical (like you've experienced) because they feel this is a way they can make you like them. They don't necessarily want to put out, but it's a way to get you hooked.
Last off, the age difference may be intimidating for these younger women. They might feel like your expecting them to be sexual because you're older. So, to prove that they're at your level of maturity they choose do it in a sexual way. This is just an opinion but I hope it helps...
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A
female
reader, Hard_decision +, writes (18 February 2010):
As a female myself in my early 20's Id have to say not all of us are like that. I enjoy giving oral sex, however I would never do it on the first date no matter how much I was into the guy. When I was younger I used to think that you had to kiss on the first date or I would think you werent interested. Now that Ive matured alot more I dont expect to kiss someone on the first date.. If I want something serious with a guy I would take it slow... not snail pace, but def wouldnt be offering oral on the first date!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2010): It depends what you are after. If you are after a serious relationship, drop these girls immediately. I do not want to believe they are all like that, at least I hope not.
Usually you get to know each other fall in love and then sex. However it is very lickely that these girls have been taught to behave like this by other men their age or else they would have been rejected or laughed at: peer pressure you know.
Anyhow since you asked the question it seems you are uneasy about the situation so I would suggest you wait for the right girl and stop this blind dating. Believe in fate and destiny and let things come your way. Eventually they will. Do not search for girls and love at all costs.
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A
male
reader, Illithid +, writes (18 February 2010):
 I know not every girl is like that. I've been in two serious relationships, one even getting as far as engagement, and I've yet to receive oral sex. I'm only 26.
Meanwhile, I've talked to a few of my female friends and they won't do that either. Not on the first date... or the tenth.
Just like with everything else in life: Different people act differently. Some girls will be perfectly happy to give you oral on the first date, some allow full sex or even anal on the first date, and some sleep around casually with friends they aren't even interested in. But there are also girls that are more mature and take things slowly. You just haven't been dating the right girls.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2010): that's depressing.
i don't know girls who do this on the first, second, or even third dates, but then i don't know people from all social circles.
i guess it makes sense that younger women are doing this, as the internet does promote these things inadvertently. still depressing though, and perhaps it is more likely to happen if you are being set up with someone.
meet someone on your own who you get to know on a casual basis first, before going on a 'date.' it's more awkward to want to blow your friend than some guy who's going on a date with you, i suppose. well, to me, it's awkward to blow any guy i don't know well. just hearing your story makes me feel kind of sick.
hopefully in five years these younger chicks will have out grown their insecure need to gain approval through sucking d*ck on the first date.
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A
female
reader, MonksDaBomb +, writes (18 February 2010):
 Well I am 26 but am considered (and consider myself!) more mature for my age, so what those girls did, I would never dream of doing, especially on a first date! Not really sure what else to add there except I can't image ALL girls in their early 20s are like that, so hope you find the right one. I guess girls these days think that if they don't act sexy and offer sex, then the man would lose interest and move onto an "easier" target - sickening, in my opinion. And I am so sorry to hear about your wife - that's so sad.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 February 2010): yes it is im also 35 and i do give oral sex but not on the first date, but now a days young girls for some reason think its safer than having actual sex but its not. they are not really concerned about the disease itself but about getting pregnant and feel its the safest way not to its ok to let a female give you oral sex you might actually like it but wear a condom every single time because if she is so quick to give it to you then no telling how many other guys she has given it to diseases are out there all over the place just stay safe and be careful dont turn all of them down its a trend now and everybodys doing it if thats the case you might find yourself alone for a very long time
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A
female
reader, Angzw  +, writes (18 February 2010):
That's why they are calling it the porno generation!
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